Helllloooo :) So this is an idea that has been in my head for a while now and I decided to share... This is just a preface kind of thing and the next few chapters will explain and make everything more apparent. It is set after the diamond of the day (amazing episode by the way) and since we haven't seen part 2, I'm assuming that all the knights are still there and everything. I will not change it around part 2 of the finale.
I do not own Merlin blah blah blah.
Merlin had to admit it- he was absolutely terrified. He with all his might had not a clue what to do. The difference between these two paths was both minor and major. One path could destroy his mind and all its worth, the other could leave him physically unable to continue the quest. Both paths would lead to the same ending and both paths would only affect him. Arthur knew he did not have a say in this matter- it was entirely Merlin's choice. Arthur knew he had no right to comment, and so he didn't, he allowed his warlock to decide his own fate.
That damned coin was their salvation and their curse. It would save Camelot but break Merlin. All of the knights had practically begged- even though it was futile- that they take the burden of the coin, and Merlin simply refused. Their warlock would never in a million years toss this burden aside for his king to carry.
Merlin was completely still as he chose his torture. Did he lose his mind? Or destroy his body? He was consumed by the choice and the hideous battle roaring on in his mind. Never before had he faced a decision so… difficult. Before these events he would always make decisions based around Arthur, based on what was best for his king, based on what was best for his kings future and Camelot.
Now- it was him. What was best from him, what would affect him more in the long term. It was a completely selfish value which most people had plenty of practice at. But Merlin, now he thought on it, never did anything for himself. And he didn't mean that in the moanish I-never-do-anything-for-myself-oh-my-god-my-dinners-late-again type of way. He literally only ever thought of Arthur's well being- and he liked it that way.
Merlin hadn't a clue what to do, and it was at this moment the king chose to place his hand upon Merlin's shoulder, as if he could hear the distress in Merlin's mind. And that was it. Merlin needed no further encouragement. Arthur was there to pick him up should he fall.
Merlin had been lifted so high be the comforting touch of Arthur's palm, that he lost sight of the true horrors that would become him on this path. Yes Arthur would be there to pick him up should he fall, but even this great warlock has his limits. And even with a hand to hold, should your strength fail you- dessert you- the hand shall be made redundant as you seek solace in your minds dark corners…
Soooo.. review please, I will try and get the new chapter up ASAP, but I need to know if you liked it and if I made any boohoos! Thank you :)