Making her happy
A/N: Thank you very much for all your reviews and to everyone who urged me to go on writing. This is really the end and I think you'll all be satisfied with it. While Insecurities didn't really turn out the way I wanted it to, at least this part did. So, on with it!
Usually everyone in the Slytherin Common Room down in the dungeons was quiet. It was cold and clammy because of the constant humidity and even the crackling fire couldn't warm the room up. But that didn't matter, since nobody really relaxed down there. The Slytherins were always plotting their next move, spreading rumors and preparing. They sat together in small groups, talking in hushed voices and always watching out for unwanted listeners. Usually. But not at four o'clock in the morning. Then it was empty. Usually.
No, it wasn't a common sight that greeted Blaise Zabini at exactly that time, when he stepped out of his dorm to grab some water and found Draco Malfoy, angrily pacing the Common Room. The glass of water forgotten, Blaise cleared his throat.
"Alright, I can't stand by and watch this any longer. What has been wrong with you for, let's see, a month now?", he asked, as Draco didn't react. Still, no reaction. "You stopped plotting", Blaise continued. "You stopped sleeping around the female inhabitants of our dungeon. You haven't used the word 'Mudblood', man, you didn't even hex any Hufflepuff! And I can't help but to ask just where I can find this amazing woman, who did this to you". The dark-haired boy sniffed angrily after his little speech, during which his best friend hadn't looked up even once.
"Just leave me alone", was the only answer he finally got.
"Okay. Fine", said Blaise and held his hands up in defeat. "I'll just go then and leave you and your heartbreak alone".
That brought the desired effect. Draco turned on his heel to face Blaise. "I'm not heartbroken", he replied heatedly.
"Uhuh. Sure".
Another silence but finally there was eye-contact between the two friends. Blaise had seen Draco torture himself long enough – Draco needed him now, even if he didn't see that himself at the moment.
"So, I guess it doesn't have to do anything with a certain bushy-haired Gryffindor Princess?", Blaise asked, a knowing smile plastered on his face.
Draco didn't even ask how he knew about that. "We agreed that there were no feelings. I don't have any feelings for her, except for lust maybe, so I … I ...", he murmured, letting the sentence hang between them. "Merlin", he groaned, falling into a rather hard and uncomfortable armchair. The ones in the Head Tower were far better.
Silence stretched between them again, only occasionally broken by Goyle's snores that could be heard from the dorm. Another thing that Draco liked about the Head Tower – he didn't have to bother with his smelly, dumb companions or whatever they were. But he didn't sleep there anymore, not since she had moved back to the Gryffindor Tower. Without her it just seemed too empty.
"She must have hexed me or something like that", he muttered darkly.
Blaise laughed. "It isn't her fault that you fell in love with her"
"Love?", Draco asked incredulous. "Who said that I'm in love? This is just some misplaced desire".
"It's not love? Then why are you here and not sleeping in your bed at this ungodly hour?".
"I just … the Head Tower is so empty since she doesn't sleep there anymore and reads and spreads her books all over". His eyes wandered to one of the empty fireplaces but he didn't really see it. His mind formed the picture of Hermione sitting next to a crackling fire, bent over some huge book and positively radiating with warmth. He felt a cold chill.
"I want her to come into my bed late at night again and when I hear that she's spending so much time with that Gryffindor douche bag Thomas, I -". He stopped abruptly, relaxing his hands which had balled into fists. Malfoy's didn't say those things. They didn't even think them. Because they didn't feel them. And even though Blaise was his only true friend in Slytherin, Draco was still embarassed.
Blaise leaned back in his seat, smirking. "That's what is commonly called love".
Draco stood up. He picked up his pace again. He was desperately thinking up some way to admit his … situation to himself and keep his pride at the same time. He finally came to the conclusion that denying his feelings and running away from them would be more cowardly than just admitting them. Because he knew it, had known it all along deep down. "I love her. I love Hermione Granger. Gryffindor Princess. Mud -", he stopped. He couldn't say it anymore. There was nothing dirty about her. "Muggleborn", he said instead.
"It's nothing to be ashamed about. Even your father fell in love with your mother. Now, just go and get her", said Blaise, standing up and feeling like he had done something good.
"I can't", said Draco, horror clouding his mind. "She hates me! She hasn't set foot in our dorm for the last month. Not even once!". He couldn't believe it. The first time he didn't only lust after, but really loved – and he had totally messed it up.
Blaise groaned. Apparently he couldn't believe it either. He thought about it for a moment. "You know what, Draco? You have nothing to lose. Tell her your feelings. Your honest feelings. Maybe she'll choose you". He shrugged. "But at least you tried".
And without waiting for an answer – not that Draco seemed ready to be giving one, his mouth was hanging unnaturally wide open – he patted his friend's shoulder and returned to his warm and cozy bed.
Hermione sighed softly and turned restlessly in her bed. It was her first night back in her own dorm in the Head Tower. And only one wall separated her from Draco Malfoy.
This month had been so hard on her. She had forbidden herself to look into his eyes because whatever she would have seen would have hurt her. And she felt like she had hurt more than enough for a lifetime. But even though her mind knew that she'd made the right decision, her heart felt differently. Her skin longed for his touch, his kisses and the sensations only he could make her feel.
She couldn't do it. She had to see him. And he'd be sleeping. He'd never know that she'd been there. She tiptoed out of her room, opened the door and peeked into his bedroom. She frowned. He wasn't there. Where …? But Hermione didn't finish the question. With a pang in her chest, she realized that she didn't want to know if he was shagging Daphne Greengrass or Pansy Parkinson right now.
Panting he reached her room and threw the door open. And frowned. Where …? Oh, right, she didn't sleep there anymore. Because she couldn't stand to be near him. He leaned against the wall closing his eyes. He had so messed up.
Still. She had to do something. Anything to make her longing stop. She stepped in front of the bed, looking down on the neatly made covers – the house elves sure were tidy. Of course it was green silk. Smiling, she stroked over the fabric lightly, enjoying the surge of memories that awakened from the sensation. Only when she noticed the wetness on her cheeks did she realize that she was crying.
With a loud pang, the door opened and an apparently tired Draco Malfoy appeared in it. The circles under his eyes were dull and lifeless. But to Hermione he looked like an angel.
Draco was equally stunned. Just when he had halfway accepted that he had lost her forever, here she was, standing in his room and seemingly stroking the covers of his bed.
Time seemed to stop, the earth seemed to stand still and all those other clichéd things seemed to happen as they stared into each other's eyes.
Draco found his voice first. "Long time no see", he croaked, taking a small step towards her as if he feared that she would run away.
"Yeah", she whispered, taking a step as well.
A moment passed between them where all thought left their head and only they existed. Hermione blinked and it was over. She was still breathless but she remembered that he had probably been gone the whole night.
"Had a nice night?", she asked, slightly bitter and winced inwardly. She didn't want to know this.
"I have had better", he answered, not realizing what she was thinking and not catching up on her tone. Hermione had to blink back tears.
"I guess I have to congratulate you", he said, gazing into her eyes sadly. This was it. She was here to say goodbye forever. And he would have to let her go.
"What on?", she asked quietly. Congratulate her? On falling in love with he villain?
"On your new boyfriend. He seems … nice. Gryffindorish. Good for you", he said, feeling his hate for Dean Thomas again. His jealousy had made his life hell for the past month. The rest of his mind was wondering whether she had always been this pretty.
"He isn't my boyfriend", she breathed, licking her lips nervously. The room wasn't that big. They stood so close already that she could have reached out and touched him. And even though the urge to do so nearly overwhelmed her, she restrained herself. It wasn't too late, yet. She could still around and leave. Except that she knew that it was too late for that since a long, long time ago.
Draco didn't have that much control. As soon as he heard that she did not love someone else and gazed into her torn eyes, he made a decision. He had never been good with words. Instead he would let his actions speak.
He brushed back a stray strand of her hair and leaned closer. His other hand went around her waist. "Screw Dean Thomas", he said before his lips met hers and all her thoughts were blown away. The kiss was gentle at first, but when Draco's tongue begged for entrance, she eagerly opened her mouth. She explored his face with her hands, caressed his cheek, his chest, his neck. Due to lack of oxygen they finally parted. Draco leaned his forehead against hers, his breathing erratic.
"I missed you", she breathed, gazing into his gray eyes. She didn't expect a response and was all the more surprised that she got one.
"I" - Pause - "missed you, too." And the moment she smiled, he felt that he could confess those things more often. Only to her, of course.
He kissed her again, slower and less hungry than before. She tasted so sweet. Of mint and strawberries. When he pulled back, he noticed the tears. He brushed them away gently.
"I love you", she said almost proudly. There was a slight glint in her eyes, a recklessness he had never seen before there. As if she just wanted him to know where she stood.
And because of the mushy atmosphere and because he really hated her tears, he forgot for a moment that he was Draco Malfoy and that, if he spoke those words, he had to tell everyone and would most likely have to spend time with St. Potter and the Weasel. But it would make her happy and that was, as Draco realized, the only thing that mattered to him.
"I love you, too".
This is really the end. A little review?