Unwelcome betrothal
Alistair ran a hand through his hair in order to stay the headache brewing but to no avail. Being king had been one long headache from the get go, he never played host to migraines before he ascended the throne, but he had be plagued with them ever since he put on the blasted crown. He never thought he had more freedom in templar training before but it was becoming a regular thought. Being king had taken him from the life he loved, being a warden was true freedom whether male or female dwarf, human or elf, mage or otherwise the wardens didn't discriminate, and although the impending doom of a blight, the calling oh and of course the nightmares all that seemed a small price to pay for true freedom.
"Ugh maker save" He sighed. He had been held up in his office for the past three days with paperwork and however hard he worked the pile never seemed to a bait. The fact that Arl Eamon's boy servant kept interrupting him every few hours requesting an audience for his master was becoming an unwelcome irritation. After a few hours of these interruptions the king decided to take a break and tell the boy the Arl could come.
"Pardon me your majesty" The boy did a deep bow. Alistair nodded and waved him to continue.
"Boy it appears you and your master have a fondness for me today as this is no less than the third time you have shown yourself in my presence" The king was not an unkind ruler he was gentle but firm, but today a headache was now in full bloom and he was in no mood. Upon hearing the king's words the boy bowed again.
"May I speak your majesty?"
"Do pray"
"The Arl requests an audience with your majesty he says it is of the upmost importance he speaks with you and says he is indeed your regent so should not have to ask three times, for such an audience considering his station and rank within the palace as your majesty's number one advisor" The boy bowed again clearly upset and flustered at having to relay the Arl's demanding and disrespectful message, well it did get Alistair's attention which he supposed was the desired effect.
The king blinked clearly shocked but made his face a calm mask, he waved the boy over.
"Come here boy" The boy began to walk over slowly clearly shaking, he stopped just in front of the king's desk. Alistair stood up and the boy clearly winced, the king was huge even without his armour, he crossed the distance around the desk and stood in front of the boy.
"What is your name boy?" The king asked.
"Samuel your majesty" The boy said in a whisper without looking up.
"Hold out your hand" The boy looked up slowly clearly alarm was written across his face as well as apprehension for what was to come.
"Do as I say" The boy shakily held out his hand and closed his eyes in apprehension. The boy suddenly felt three cold coins pile into his feeble hand; he slowly opened his eyes and saw that they were three sovereigns, his eyes turned as large as saucers. The boy's general appearance and expression told the king that the boy had never seen this much coin in all his short life.
"Your majesty?" The boy asked incredulously.
"Your old master who was he?"
"The Arl of Denerim sire I was only a small boy of eight when I was sent there" The boy answered still transfixed on the coin he held.
"Eight but then how old are you now?"
"I am twelve my lord" Alistair paled at that; being underfed had clearly made the boy appear a lot smaller and younger than he was but by the maker he only looked six.
"And he used to hit you?" The king asked clearly scared of the answer he would receive.
"Why yes my lord, I been in service of many noble houses and they have all punished me when they saw fit" The boy looked at the king as if to say 'Why are you asking me all this'
"Well Samuel have no fear I shall never hit you nor will any of my staff here at the palace, take this coin and give it to your family, oh and if anyone does raise a hand to you Samuel they will have me to deal with, you will report it to me if anyone attempts to punish you even if it is the Arl himself?"
"Why yes your majesty, sire thank you sire you are most kind and generous" Alistair smiled down at the boy and ruffled his curly blonde hair, then motioned for the door dismissing him. Samuel pocketed the coin and took a deep bow, smiled and turned to leave but before he could the king called out to him.
"Oh and Samuel tell your master he may have his audience, tell him to come by immediately"
Samuel smiled and bowed again then left the room clicking the door shut. Alistair sighed and sat back at his desk and the huge pile of paperwork was still there worst luck.
"By the maker he really thought I was going to strike him didn't he?"
"Well my lord for a minute I did" the answer came from his personal guard Gerrard but Gerrard was more than a guard he was a friend.
"Oh stop! In the four years I have been king have you ever known me to act unjustly or ever for that matter strike a child, I am no tyrant" Alistair dragged a weary hand down the length of his face and sighed again.
"Well true you are no tyrant but you are intimidating even without your armour I think the boy is just used to beatings from masters I don't think it was personal sire don't worry you are a fair and just ruler"
"Thanks Gerrard"
Alistair sighed again and began to wonder what Eamon could want so urgently that he sent a servant to him three times in two hours. He hoped it wasn't anything to do with the Orlesians again, since the blight they had being trying to take over some of the lowlands worst hit by the taint, with so many refugees, burned out cities still rebuilding and orphaned children still not over their loss the last thing Ferelden needed right now was a civil war with the overbearing country. A knock at the door broke him from his bleak thoughts. A servant entered and bowed deeply.
"The Arl of Redcliffe your majesty"
Alistair straightened as the servant side stepped the door to allow the Arl passage through the door. Eamon bowed and Alistair waved him over to a seat in front of his desk.
"Your majesty good of you to permit me an audience...eventually" He sniped.
"Well your grace if the plan was to irritate and disturb me from my duty until I condescended to your audience it worked" The king countered. Both men stared each other down and then chuckled at the same time.
"How are you anyway your majesty?"
"Busy and please Eamon must you always be so formal even in private?"
"I know you hate the formality sire but you never know who is listening, spies are everywhere, and walls have ears you know" Eamon joked. The king smiled and gestured for him to continue.
"So your grace pray tell me what did you want to see me about?" Eamon folded his hands atop the desk and leaned forward so just the king could hear his whispers.
"Actually my lord it's a rather delicate matter, I had wondered if we could speak privately?" Eamon whispered and gestured with his chin towards Gerrard. Alistair then began to panic; the situation with the Orlesians must be truly dire if his own guard could not be privy to Eamon's revelation. He nodded and looked towards Gerrard.
"Guard captain" Gerrard bowed.
"Yes your majesty?"
"Leave us" Gerrard immediately bowed and made swift exit and clicked the door shut. He nodded for Eamon to continue and leaned forward in anticipation for the announcement of an impending war.
"Alistair you are aware that this coming month marks the fourth year of you reign, ascension and coronation of king" Eamon said levelly.
"Yesssss...what about it? I'm aware of how long I have been in office Eamon" He said back by the maker than man really knew how to drag out bad news.
"Well since the blight, you have become a just and fair ruler, the nobles who questioned your rule have now come over to your favour, you have so far had a reign to challenge Maric's and without question challenge Cailin's rule, but there are still people who favour Anora as queen and want to usurp you"
"Oh for the makers sake Eamon! The woman is dead, I signed the execution order myself remember, and most nobles here in the city agreed with the decision to be rid of her. Are you honestly telling me that after three years without Anora suddenly there will be an insurrection in her name? Everyone agreed she was to be put to death" He said angrily he was sick to death of hearing about bloody Anora she was enough trouble when she was alive. Alistair hadn't wanted to put her to death, but when the determined woman had sent the Antivan crows to assassinate him was the last nail in the coffin. If it wasn't for Zeveran's heads up and connections in the crows Alistair would no doubt be dead, so with the backing of the nobles he sent the woman to the scaffold.
"Yes Alistair but you can't sway some stubborn people, yes she is dead but there are still some underground supporters for her, the king's guard will route them out be sure of that, but it begs the question of what if another attempt on your life is arranged, and maker forbid succeeds, Ferelden will be left without a ruler and no doubt a civil war will begin"
Oh maker so this is what this was all about, he thought it was about a war with Orlais but no it was worse Eamon was harping on about him marrying and producing an heir again.
"Oh so your true purpose becomes clear" Alistair stated as he leaned back in his chair and folded his arms over his taut chest.
"You need an heir" Eamon stated plainly.
"You know where I stand on this subject" Alistair stated just as plainly clearly irritated that Eamon had broached this particular topic again especially after the last time he had brought it up disatourosly.
Eamon wrung his hands nervously and leaned forward once more. "Alistair please listen to reason, you are the last of the Therrin bloodline, after you there is no one else, consider the times we live in maker forbid, if you die the country will be in uproar, Ferelden is still not over the worst of the blight we are still vulnerable a civil war will finish us off" He took a breath and began once more.
"You have not long returned from Kirkwall have you not? You have seen with your own eyes what happens when two people or two groups of people lay claim to one title, with no one to mediate on it that city is in disarray since the viscount died think of Ferelden!" Eamon exclaimed.
"For the love of the maker Eamon!" Alistair shouted as he hit the desk with his fist, Eamon visibly winced but stood his ground and ignored Alistair's loss of control. Alistair visibly took a breath to calm himself, he hated Eamon trying to convince him to marry, but moreover he hated arguing with the only father figure he had ever known.
"All I have done since I took this crown is think of Ferelden, I fought the blight for Ferelden, I killed Logain for Ferelden, I executed Anora for Ferelden, I took the blasted crown for Ferelden and I let the only woman I had ever love... loved sacrifice herself for Ferelden... isn't that enough for you and your bloody Ferelden" Alistair leaned back in his chair and coughed to clear his throat of the tears that threatened to flow.
Eamon clearly deflated and softened his face, he hated upsetting Alistair and after four years the loss of his love was still raw for him. He softened his voice and began to speak again. "Your still in love with her aren't you? The warden?"
Alistair's eyes flicked up to him clearly full of pain "Elveria, her name is... Was Elveria you know it as well as I" He almost whispered. "Yes I apologize Elveria; she was a good woman, because of her sacrifice we live today. You know son I don't want you to marry only for the sake of an heir I worry about you tis not good to be alone especially a young man with so much love to give, you changed when she died, became colder but underneath it all I still believe you are soft and crave affection as any man"
"I have no love to give, I gave it all to her, don't you understand I knew we could never marry, she was an elf me a human and was going to be a king, any vows I ever took I wanted them to be with her, when I knew I was to be king I promised myself I would never marry unless by some miracle I could marry her. As you know no king could have married an elf let alone a Dalish they would have never let her go, so I decided long ago I would never marry" Alistair cleared his throat once again talking of her was still hard even after four long years without her.
"I do not believe she would want you to be alone forever, you are very loving by nature she would have wanted you to be happy" Eamon stated wishing Alistair would stop blaming himself for her death.
"Don't you think it would be terribly unfair to my wife, if I were in a mind to take one that is, she will never live up to Elveria, what woman or person would want to live in the shadow of their spouse's former love? Also being a Grey warden I do not even know if I can even have a child. It would be cruel for my wife to live in my previous loves shadow but if I cannot even give her a child what comfort will she have in our marriage?" Alistair said looking miserable at the prospect of making another as miserable as he was.
At this statement Eamon got up and skirted around the desk to where Alistair sat distraught and gently touched his shoulder. "Alistair you are like a son to me, I just want you to happy, I never thought I would find love again after Isolde was taken during the blight but look at me and Jane, yes I still love Isolde but Jane makes me happy and Conner loves her, What I am trying to say is it may seem unimaginable to love again but it is possible another could make you happy, she will never replace Elveria and what you have lost, but she could make you happy and content" Eamon squeezed Alistair's shoulder and after a few seconds the king began to nod slowly.
"Okay Eamon, make the nessecery arrangements for no more than ten candidates for my hand, be sure to pick virtuous and kind ladies Ferelden does not need another heavy handed queen, and I would at least like to enjoy my wife's company" Eamon squeezed the king's shoulder again and moved towards the door to leave.
"Oh and Eamon"
"Yes your majesty?"
"Thank you truly"
Eamon nodded, bowed and then turned on his heel to exit the room eager to sort out the arrangements, happy that it hadn't turned into a full scale argument like the last time he had brought up the prospect of marriage, that particular discussion had ended with the king swiftly asking Eamon to leave the palace for a while, he had been called back after two weeks or so but Eamon still felt awful about it.
Alistair sighed and got up from his chair and walked to the large stained glass window and stared at the huge tree with its branches blowing in the wind, keeper Marithari has planted the tree of life she had called it in remembrance of Elveria and with a little elven magic the tree had grown full and strong within months. He always felt as though a part of her was bound within that tree, he would often seek comfort and strength from it.
The door clicked shut and Alistair made no move to turn around to see who was bothering him now.
"Your majesty are you quite well?" Gerrard asked clearly apprehensive for the answer, he must have heard at least the raised voiced parts of his exchange with the Arl from his post outside.
"Quite Gerrard I am to take a wife" He said without preamble.
"Oh" Gerrard said clearly shocked.
"Indeed" Alistair said still staring out at the tree and offering no further explanation to Gerrard. He closed his eyes and he could see her, soft golden waved tresses blowing in the wind, gentle tattoo's covering her forehead and those beautiful green as grass eyes wide and innocent. He opened his eyes and the tree's leaves swayed from side to side, a single tear made a path down his cheek and he said in a whisper so Gerrard could not hear
"Forgive me"