Hindsight, Foresight, and Blind
She knows the way out of Lima, and it doesn't involve contemplating the smell of rain light enough to walk in without getting soaked. It's best if Quinn just avoids thinking about the baby at all, even if that is virtually impossible.
"Cause I was feeling fat that day…" she stares in the mirror with her hand resting on her stomach and thinks Oh, if I'd only known.
It doesn't matter, though. It doesn't matter what it takes, what she has to sacrifice, how many people she'll have to step on to get there. Quinn is getting the fuck out of here the first chance she gets. She thinks she might love Finn, or the idea of Finn, or maybe just that he's hers hers hers, but she'll leave him behind too if that's what it takes.
There is a fever in her skin, itching and loud. Maybe it won't be the Cheerios, maybe she's just not Rachel fucking Barry voice enough to ride out that way, but Quinn is smart. She's not beyond compromising herself and her integrity too.
The end (of her reputation, of her relationships, of all but one of her dreams) justifies the means.
Quinn knows the way out of Lima, but it's not going to be easy.
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It's not going to be easy, Rachel thinks, but she wouldn't have it any other way.
Winning is an addiction, but the challenge is the real drug. She can feel it in the ache of her body after a good work out, when she hits that note just right, (oh god and nothing could compare to his form pressed against hers--just knowing what he'll deny). Somehow winning has become all about Finn watching her, hearing her, feeling her. Sometimes she thinks he's an overdose waiting to happen.
He'd told her once that he needed her, and, okay, he needed her to support a family with Quinn, but he needed her. He could lean on her. Quinn? Well, Quinn was the burden. Rapidly becoming a rather heavy one.
Rachel is a good person, but no one in love is that good.
So when she leaves Lima, she is going to damn well do it with Finn by her side.
Her dreams are bigger than him, yes, but she's starting to suspect that her dreams won't be worth much in the long run without him. This angers her, makes her regret that she didn't slap him harder, because she knows he'll make a liar out of her. Everything will be fine, she can be a liar for him if he'll let her make a lover out of him.
She's not leaving high school a failure; that's just not an option, and she knows the way out of Lima.