Ok tell me of I should continue this, I don't know yet if I should. I tried something a little different, and I kinda like it. Sorry for being so inactive lately :3
D:
There was a boy who sat by the window
The boy never spoke or smiled or laughed
But he was beautiful
The boy had blue eyes, black hair, and buck teeth.
He was truly beautiful
J:
There was a boy in my class
He always wore long sleeves no matter the weather
But he was beautiful
He had blonde hair, shades and the most perfect smile
I was in love with him
D:
The boy with the blue eyes came up to me today
He then uttered a word
"Hey"
My cheeks went red and my hands went shaky
I stuttered a word back
"Hi"
We stand there awkwardly for a while
Until the blue eyed boy speaks
"I'm John."
"I'm Dave"
The silence continues
J:
"I'm John." I say
"I'm Dave."
This boy Dave was absolutely perfect
I wanted to tell him that
I wanted to tell him I loved him
But what if he rejects me
I know he will
I'm disgusting
But I say it anyway
"I love you"
His cheeks go red
Oh god he doesn't like me
He looks me in the eyes and says
"I love you to"
"I love you."
D:
My cheeks went red
He loved me
I loved him
Does that mean anything
So I say it
"I love you to."
J:
Dave then cups my face in his hands
He leans in close
Was he going to kiss my disgusting lips?
He then pressed his lips on mine
He did
He kissed me, the disgusting, fat me
I kissed back
I loved it
I was in love with the blonde haired kid
The one that was perfect
I wasn't
I was far from perfect
He was perfect
Skinny
Strong
I was
Ugly
Fat
And an asshole
I hope he never finds out about what I do
The thing that destroyed me
Anorexia
D:
I felt John kiss back
He was such a great kisser
I wasn't
I was terrible
I don't deserve him
I was too fucked up
There's a reason I never wear short sleeves
And that reason is
Scars
J:
Dave then turned away
He pulled his sleeves over his palms
I sigh
I knew he would never like me
I knew he was lying
I start walking home
Maybe I was too gross
That was probably it
Maybe if I threw up
Then Dave would want me
D:
I started walking away
John didn't want a broken fuck like me
He deserved someone better
Not me
Someone who didn't have the scars I own
I got my bag and ran to the bathroom
He would maybe leave if he knew what I did
I locked the stall door
I rolled my sleeve up
Held the blade to my arm
And cut
Cut
Cut
J:
I walked home in silence
He didn't want my lard ass
He wanted a perfect woman
Her perfect legs
Her flat stomach
Her butt
I was just a guy
A broken
Fucked up kid
Not some model
Fuck he probably didn't even want to touch anyone male
He was probably lying
I opened the door to my house
No one was home
That was normal
I then saw mom had left a note
I didn't bother to read it
She had left some food
I knew I was going to eat it
And more
Which I did
I ate
Ate and ate
Then I vomited it all up
God I hate myself
D:
I wrapped the wounds I made and rolled down my sleeve
No one knew this habit
So I continued
John hates me
He wants someone better
Not broken
Not hurt
Someone who knows how to care for themselves
Not me
I grabbed my bag and started making my way out of the school
I got to my car and drove home
There was no fighting when I got there
There was only one voice
Bro's
I knew it
Everyone else had left me
he heard me walk in
By his expression it showed he saw I knew
"I'm sorry"
it was all he said
I hugged him
Then with tears in my eyes I left to my room
It soon all was let out
Tears staining my clothes
I fell asleep crying
J:
For the third night in a row
I was sitting on my bed
I had vowed I wouldn't eat again
I had broken that promise
Damn I really can't control myself
My dad would soon be home
Not yet
I was still alone
I wanted to know if the throwing up had made me smaller
Even a few ounces
I walk into my bathroom
The scale was in a corner
I pull it out and step on it
75 pounds
I had lost weight
I smile
I knew I was sick
I liked being sick
It made me feel in control
Soon I heard a knock on my door
"John."
I looked up
"Yeah"
He smiled
"You ate the cake I made"
I nod
"I guess."
He leaves
I then fall to the floor
And cry
D:
The next morning I was woken
Bro had shaken me
I rise from my bed
Another shit day
I trudge downstairs
Bro had made some pancakes
I had a few
I then went to school
Maybe John does love me
I walk into the classroom
Hoping
J:
I hear my alarm clock beep
Annoying
Like everything else
I trudge to the bathroom
Maybe I had lost more weight
Dave would like me more
I know he would
I step on the scale
74 pounds
I had lost more
Dave will love me more
I hope he does
When I arrive at school Dave looks at me
He blushes
Did he really like me?
Impossible
I sit down at my desk and look out the window
Dave was looking at me
And Blushing
Did he really like me?