Disclaimer: I don't... oh, what in the hell am I still going on about. Do you really think I own this stuff? Come on, people. Realism here.

Whenever I don't feel like studying, I write. This is me, not wanting to study, browsing the challenge thread over at Stars-Hollow.

This is for Leigh, since she tossed the challenge out.

Challenge: The fic has to start with the words "The walls in hell are always pink."

One Shot: "The Walls in Hell are Always Pink"

"The walls in hell are always pink" he states, an expression of pure disgust traveling across his face as he surveys the space around him.

His wife elbows him.

"Shut up!"

"Rory! Look at this place! It's pink! Shocking pink! It looks like some distorted, real life version of Barbie's Malibou Mansion!"

Rory elbows him again, a little more forcefully this time

"Be nice. We agreed to come here, and tell Dad and... Sherry..." She grabs his arm as she senses him moving to bail. "You're not leaving me here by myself! This is half your fault!"

He rolls his eyes.

"You weren't complaining, as I recall. Actually, I think you seemed to enjoy it..." He smirks maliciously at her.

"Jess!" she clamps a hand on his mouth as he hears footsteps approaching

"Rory! Hi! How are you Sweetie? We haven't seen you in... forever!" Sherry's overly perky voice pierces through the air. Both Jess and Rory Mariano unvoluntarily wince at the sound, moments before the blonde's arms envelope Rory in a suffocating, piton style clutch.

"Hey Sherry. Yes, it's been too long" Or not long enough, she thinks.

Sherry moves to hug Jess, but his entire demeanor, let alone his facial expression, just about scream "touch me and die"

Hence, she resolves to shake his hand.

Rory glances around nervously. There is really too much pink in this room

The walls are pink.

The sofa is pink.

The door and window frames are painted pink, for goodness sake.

She remembers her stepmother being pregnant and a baby shower, where everything for the baby had been green, 'cause "Green is the new pink."

Now, it seems that pink is the new... designated color for a living room

Jess could gag. He tries thinking, for distraction, about his house, the home he shares with Rory. Where walls are a faded light yellow, the couch is a rich dark blue, and door and window frames are brown like they should be.

Where everything is as it should be.

Where bookcases line every possible unoccupied vertical surface, and each book a window into a different dimension, a parallel universe neither will ever get tired of exploring.

"Your father is going to be here..." Sherry is interrupted by Christopher throwing the front door open, Gigi squeezing by him to run inside and fairly jump on Rory, who stumbles right into Jess. Caught off guard, they all topple to the floor.

Chris just stares at the human heap lying in his living room. Sherry glares at her daughter. Gigi is sporting an ear to ear grin. Rory is giggling helplessly and Jess is scowling

"Gigi?" Asks Christopher

"Here Daddy."

"Rory?"

"No injuries, Dad"

"Jess?"

"Just fine and dandy."

"Good. Do you mind getting up... and sitting on the couch? I have a feeling it would be more comfortable for all parties involved."

Jess sits on the couch, Rory held somewhat protectively in his arms. He's frowning as he whispers in her ear

"You ok?"

"Yes"

"Feeling weird?"

"No."

"Well... falling isn't good... You sure?"

"Jess, I'm ok. Really. Stop worrying. Please."

"Stop whispering! It's not polite!" pipes up Gigi.

Jess rolls his eyes, and Rory elbows him for the umpeenth time today.

"So? To what do we owe this pleasure?" Chris asks of Rory.

Rory takes a deep breath.

"Well... Jess and I... we met in Star's Hollow ten years ago..."

Chris raises and eyebrow.

"I know that."

"And we got married two years ago..."

Chris gives her an exasperated look

"And... ehrm... Dad... Sherry... Gigi... I'm... we're..."

Jess jumps in.

"We're going to have a ..."

Chris and Sherry look at them wide eyed

Silence.

Jess and Rory look in each other's eyes... there's a silent daring game.

Who's gonna say it first?

Gigi stomps her foot, just about exasperated.

"You're gonna have a what? Party?"

"No Gerogia" says Rory.

"Uhmm... A cup of tea? " The nine year old wonders... "A cow?"

"What?"asks Jess, utterly bewildered.

"I don't know... It sounded good"

"Oh God" the Marianos utter in disbelief

"A friend over for dinner? Green Eggs and Ham?"

"A baby!"exlaim both Rory and Jess.

Silence again.

Jess finally splits it down the middle.

"Dr. Seuss, huh?"

"I liked him."

He relinquishes Rory, who goes to hug an overly exstatic Sherry and a flabbergasted Chris.

"You... and him... and... a baby... Rory! You're pregnant... by him..."

"Dad?"

"You're too young!"

"I'm twenty-six, Dad. That's hardly young"

She knows this drill with her father.

He pulled it when she and Jess had decided to move in together while she was going through graduate school at Columbia

When she had decided to answer Jess' question, choosing to become his wife, two years prior.

And now, with this baby.

Chris finally hugs her.

"Good luck, honey." He can't help but be happy for his daughter. For the the baby he didn't hold in his arms, and for the little girl whose first word he didn't hear, and for the young lady he didn't get to be jealous of... and for the woman who is now willingly sharing a part of her life with him.

She returns it, gladly.

"Are you guys staying for dinner?" Sherry volunteers. Both Jess and Rory shake their heads no.

"We're going back" States Jess.

"Roads are icy, and it's getting late, and tomorrow we both have to be... somewhere." Offers Rory, playing off her husband's cue as it often happens between them.

Final goodbyes are exchanged

"That wasn't so bad, was it?"

Jess just looks at her, raising his eyebrow, rubbing his offended side.

"Payback time" he mutters, drawing her to him and tickling her mercilessly in front of their car.

"Stop! Jess! I'm giving... all your Hemmingways... over to to... Lai!" She chockes out through the helpless laughter he's eliciting from her.

"You are not giving any of my books over to... your sister."

"She' also your cousin... and why not?" Rory bats her eyelashes at him, leaning against the car door, his faces inches from hers and his body not allowing even that short a distance between them.

"Because she'll scrawl her notes over mine. And I won't understand a thing. "

She kisses him.

He kisses her back.

"Hey Daddy." She chides.

He shakes his head.

"Home." He whispers in her ear, before kissing her again.

"If we go home now, can we paint the walls pink?" She asks, seriously.

"I'm filing for divorce." He replies, just as seriously.

"Halleluja! I'm free!" She lets glee slip in her voice.

"Geez! I thought you would at least pretend to fight me on this!" He allows hurt to seep into his.

"Why? I get all the books, all the CD's, child support... and I get rid of the sarcastic smartassed hoodlum I married. Win win situation. Can't go wrong there." Her hands wander to his waist.

"You really thought this through, haven't you?" He leans in, slowly traveling the small distance between their lips.

"Yeah. It was right after the 'say "I do" voice' on the 'Wedding Day to do list'" Her eyes tilts up slightly.

They hold each other's gaze throughout this entire exchange.

Matching grins paint their faces and they share another kiss.

"Let's go." She mumbles against his lips. "I wanna start in on my painting job."

"Uh-huh. Like to see you try, Gilmore." He circles around to the driver's side of the car.

"Just watch me, Mariano." She challenges, getting in.

A/N: Review. It makes my day. And Carys lives off the stuff. So, if you wanna keep her alive... hand over the feedback. :)