Chapter 1: The beginning of a New Beginning
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Day: Monday
Time: 5:28 am.
Weather: Sunny Morning
At: The Sanzo Party
Location: Some random inn
Current Occupation: Sleeping
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Hakkai: -opens eyes, smiles, stretches, then gets up- Hmmmm……What a wonderful morning. goes to take a shower
-Gojyo walks into the living room(he just came back from a girlfriends house)-
Hakkai: -singing tone- La la la la la what a B-eautiful daayyyy! The sun is shining, Gokus' not whining-
Gojyo: -confused- What the hell? -walks to bathroom door and puts his ear onto that door-
Hakkai: and Sanzo's not yelling for coff-eeeeeeee!! Oh, yes! Today is a wonderful-
Gojyo: Hey!?
Hakkai: -female screaming voice- AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! -falls down in shower-
Gojyo: Let me guess…………Hakkai.
Hakkai: Ow! GOJYO!! -puts towel on and opens the door- Gojyo what are you doing?! You scared me by yelling like that.
Gojyo: It had to be stopped. Your singing could kill and just that fact of you singing for NO REASON was kinda creepy.
Hakkai: -mad- Well, sorry, Gojyo. Now just go away. -closes door-
Gojyo: Fine. But if you start singing again, I'm gonna take Sanzos' gun and shoot you. -walks to his room-
1 hour later……………
Hakkai: Breakfast is ready!! -happy, chibi smile-
-Gojyo walks over and sits down-
Hakkai: Good morning, Gojyo! -smile-
Gojyo: Yeah. -starts to eat-
-they hear a rumbling sound coming from Gokus' room-
Gojyo: I guess the monkey is up.
Goku: -door slams open- BBBBBBRRRRREEEEEAAAAAAKKKKKKKFFFFFAAAASSSSTTTTTT!! BREAKFAST BREAKFAST BREAKFAST BREAKFAST!! runs over and starts snarfing the food
-Sanzo walks in half asleep-
Gojyo: Hey, monkey!! Stop eating all the food!! -fights back-
Hakkai: Good morning, Goku. Good morning, Sanzo.
-Sanzo sits down staring into dark abyss-
Sanzo: Coffee.
Hakkai: Right away. -practically skips off to make him coffee-
Gojyo: Well, looky here. Grandpa's up. (surrendered his battle against Goku)
Sanzo: Die. -points gun at Gojyo- I'm too tired this morning to deal with your pointless actions and worthless words, kappa.
Gojyo: -ducks down in fear that Sanzo will hit him- What is that supposed to mean?!
Sanzo: It means, you're too stupid for my time. So for that, I will kill you.
Hakkai: Please, no blood shed this early.
-Goku is still eating all the food-
Sanzo: Hmph! -hits monkey with fan- Chew your food.
Goku: Ow!! Okay, okay. Fine. -slows food consumption pace-
Gojyo: Well, are we going to drive today?
Hakkai: Yes. I believe so.
Gojyo: Damn. There's some women I didn't get that play around with. -sulks-
Goku: Play? You means like tag and stuff?
Gojyo: Yeah, adult tag. -mischievous smile-
Hakkai: Gojyo, please don't talk like that right now.
Gojyo: Oh, so you want me to say what it really is called? -bigger mischievous smile-
Hakkai: Oh, please Gojyo, no!
Gojyo: Fine, then.
Sanzo: You're sick.
Gojyo: Shut up!
3 more hours later when they are driving……………
Goku: I'm hungry.
Gojyo: How the hell can you be hungry!! You ate all the food for breakfast!! And we stopped an hour ago to buy some food, WHICH YOU ATE!! -mad-
Goku: I can't help it. I'm just really hungry.
Sanzo: Get over it. You don't need any more food.
Goku: But-but!! I could starve to death if I don't eat!!
Sanzo: You of all people can't starve to death.
Goku: You don't know that!! I could die right now of starvation!!
Gojyo: That's impossible, monkey. You just ate!!
Goku: But, I'm still hungry!!
Hakkai: Oh, Goku. Please, just calm down. We'll be at the next town soon and we'll eat there.
Goku: It betta be soon.
Hakkai: It will.
At 3:11 pm…………………
Goku: I'm gonna die!! It's been soooooooooo long!! Hakkai you lied!!
Hakkai: Well, ummmmm………… we won't be able to get to the next town for six more hours. I'm sorry Goku.
Goku: SIX MORE HOURS!! I don't have any food!! I can't last that long!! I'll-I'll-I'll DIE!!
Gojyo: YOU STUPID MONKEY!! YOU ATE ALL THE FOOD!! NOW, I'LL GO HUNGRY!
-shakes Goku back and forth-
Sanzo: SHUT UP!! -shoots gun in air-
Hakkai: Now, now. It's not that long. We will just have to last till then.
Gojyo: Hmph! I hate you, Goku.
Goku: -sad- I'm sorry.
At Houtou Castle……………
Kougaiji: -sighs in pleasure then gets out of bed (he just woke up) walks out of his room(still in pjs)walks over into kitchen to see Dokugakuji eating a donut- Hey, Dokugaku.
Dokugakuji: Finally. The prince is up.
Kougaiji: -sarcastic- Ha ha, very funny. So, what's for breakfast? -gets milk out of refrigerator and pours some into a glass-
Dokugakuji: Yaone isn't gonna make breakfast. Instead, she gave me these as a substitute. -points at donuts- She said she took them from Niis' office.
With Nii…………
Nii: -sighs in pleasure- Finally, I get to sit here with my coffee and eat my delicious do- -looks down and sees his donuts have been stolen- WHY?! WHY, GOD?? WHY MUST YOU TORTURE ME LIKE THIS!! -falls on knees and cries-
Back with Kou and Dokugaku…………………
Kougaiji: -confused- Okay, now what are those? - looks at donuts-
Dokugakuji: -shocked- You don't know what these are?
Kougaiji: Yeah, I've never seen it before.
Dokugakuji: ARE YOU CRAZY??
Kougaiji: Um, what?
Dokugakuji: YOU NEED TO TRY ONE!! -grabs Kou, pushes him against the wall, and tries to shove a donut into his mouth-
-Kou grabs Dokugakus' arms and tries to push him back-
Dokugakuji: You……must……EAT ONE!!
Kougaiji: Why? They look horrible!! -still struggling to keep donut away-
Dokugakuji: EAT IT!! -forces donut closer to Kou-
Kougaiji: NO!! (he is losing)
-Yaone runs in-
Yaone: What going on?! -sees Dokugaku trying to force a donut into Kous' mouth-
Dokugakuji: JUST EAT IT!! -shoves donut closer-
Yaone: Dokugaku! What are you doing?! -runs over to Dokugaku and Kou and tries to break them apart-
-Dokugakuji shoves donut into Kous' mouth-
Dokugakuji: Ha ha ha! -takes a step back- I win. -smiles victoriously-
Kougaiji: -cough- -cough- I'm gonna die. -slides down onto the floor-
Yaone: -worried- Kougaiji-sama, are you alright?
Dokugakuji: He'll be fine. It was just a donut.
Kougaiji: It was disgusting. -wipes donut remains off his face-
Dokugakuji: You are crazy!! Yaone, I swear something's wrong with him.
Yaone: Nothing is wrong with him, but with you I think otherwise. You just made Kougaiji-sama eat a donut, I think. (doesn't quite get what the heck was going on in the first place)
Dokugakuji: Well, he needed to try one and I know for sure he wasn't going too.
Kougaiji: Hmph. spoiled, brat pout
Yaone: worried Kougaiji-sama, are you sure you are alright?
Kougaiji: My pride is damaged, but I'll be fine. -still pouting-
Dokugakuji: Ha ha ha ha ha!
Yaone: This isn't right.
-Yaone brings out remote and starts to rewind all that happened, but pauses at a moment when Kou is just standing there looking really sexy (Yaone sighs in complete joy) continues to rewind-
Kougaiji: -sighs in pleasure then gets out of bed (he just woke up) walks out of his room(still in pjs)walks over into kitchen to see Dokugakuji eating a sandwich- Hey, Dokugaku.
Dokugakuji: Finally. The prince is up.
Kougaiji: -sarcastic- Ha ha, very funny. So, what's for breakfast? -gets milk out of refrigerator and pours some into a glass-
Dokugakuji: Oh ho! Look at the time, Kou. It's way passed breakfast time.
Kougaiji: Fine then. What's for lunch? -takes sip from glass-
Dokugakuji: It's passed lunch too. -grin-
Kougaiji: Crap. -puts glass onto counter- Well, is there anything TO eat? -looks in refrigerator then the cabinets-
Dokugakuji: Nope. This is all the food we have. -eats the rest of sandwich- And now it's gone. Sorry, Kou.
Kougaiji: Jerk. -glares-
Dokugakuji: Oh, you'll be fine. Yaone said she'll get some groceries later. -smiles-
Kougaiji: Fine. We're going to go fight the Sanzo Party in a little while, so get ready. -starts to walk out-
Dokugakuji: Okay. You better get ready too.
With the Sanzo Party………………………
Goku: Starvation…………
Gojyo: Aggravation……………
Sanzo: Irritation. -brings out newspaper-
Gojyo: Man, I'm bored. -stares up into the sky-
Hakkai: Well, maybe Goku will play a game of cards with you.
Gojyo: pokes Goku Play cards with me. -poke……poke……poke………poke-
Goku: I'm to hungry to move.
Gojyo: Too bad. -poke……poke………poke-
Goku: -annoyed- Stop it.
Gojyo: No. Play cards. -poke……poke……poke-
-Gojyo continues to poke Goku-
-Goku slaps Gojyo across the face-
Gojyo:- shocked and depressed- Goku?
Goku: -teary- I've had enough!! I don't want to be around you anymore; all you do is push me around and irritate me!! I'm leaving!! I hate you!! All of you!!- jumps out of jeep and starts running away-
Gojyo: -mad- Well, fine! Go!
Sanzo: -sad- No, Goku!! You can't leave!!
Goku: Why not?! You hate me!!
Sanzo: No, I don't. All I want to do is protect you and I don't really know how to say this but…I care about you Goku for you are my son.
Hakkai: -shocked- Holy-!!
Goku: Wh-what?
Sanzo: The Merciful Goddess and I had you.
Goku: You mean, I have parents?
Gojyo: The Merciful Goddess!! But, I love her!! She said she loves me too!! How-how could you, Sanzo!! -slaps Sanzo- She's even your Aunt!!
Sanzo: She doesn't love you!! And it doesn't matter if she might be my Aunt!! She was just trying to get you to feel better!! You're just a failed experiment!!
Gojyo: Failed experiment?!
Sanzo: You mean you don't know??
Goku: Sanzo? Are you lying to me?
Sanzo: No. I am your father. -hugs Goku-
Gojyo: But, what do you mean by failed experiment?!
Hakkai: What is going on??
-suddenly a duck falls from the sky and hit's Hakkai on the head-
Hakkai: -opens his eyes to see that Yaone is poking him- Huh? What?
Yaone: Hello. -smiles-
Hakkai: What is going on?
Yaone: Well, you were asleep and so is the rest of the Sanzo Party.
Hakkai: I see. But, if we were asleep, why didn't you take the Scripture?
Yaone: Kougaiji-sama tried, but Sanzo-san keeps slapping him when he got near. It was very odd.
Previously……………
Kougaiji: Wow. The whole Sanzo Party are asleep.
Dokugakuji: Yeah, maybe you should try to get the Scripture from Sanzo. (bad idea)
Kougaiji: Good idea. -walks over to Sanzo and reaches for the Scripture-
Yaone: -worried- Be careful.
Kougaiji: Come' on, Yaone. What's the worst he can do? He's asleep.
-Sanzo slaps Kougaiji across the face(still asleep) Kougaiji falls onto the ground-
Dokugakuji: -laughs histaricly- I guess that's the worst! -still laughing-
-Yaone runs over-
Kougaiji: Ow! Bastard!!-gets up-
Yaone: Kougaiji-sama!! Are you alright?!
Kougaiji: I'm fine. -tries again, but gets slapped- That's it!! -jumps into jeep(without stepping on someone) and reaches for the Scripture-
-Sanzo spins around and slaps Kou again. Kou falls onto Gojyo and part of Goku-
Kougaiji: Ow! -looks to see he landed on Gojyo AHH!! jumps off trembling in fear-
-Dokugaku still laughing-
Yaone: Kougaiji-sama? -runs over to him-
Kougaiji: -sigh- Time to try again.
(after awhile he keeps getting slapped so he stops trying and Dokugaku was laughing the whole time)
Blast to the Future!! - where we last left off with Yaone and Hakkai……
Hakkai: That's interesting.
Yaone: Yes. Very. -gazes over at Kougaiji-
Hakkai: Miss Yaone?
-Kougaiji is poking Goku-
Kougaiji: Get up.
-monkey starts to fart(a real nasty one) snore, drool, roll, scratch himself(in odd places) and does the cycle over again-
Kougaiji: (he says to Goku) -grossed out- You are the most disgusting creature I have ever met.
-Goku is still repeating the cycle-
Dokugakuji: Not having any luck?
Kougaiji: No. You?
Dokugakuji: Me neither. But, he's dreaming of a hot Brazilian chick in a bikini serving him beer as he is being waited upon by dozens of other hot chicks.
Kougaiji: And how to you know this?
Dokugakuji: It's written all over his face. -points at Gojyo-
-Gojyo is laying there with a big smile that just spells perverted disaster-
Kougaiji: I see what you mean. -starts poking Goku again-
Dokugakuji: Yeah.
-Goku kicks Gojyo in the face. Gojyo wakes up-
Gojyo: Gah! What?! -stumbles up-
Dokugakuji: How do you do, Gojyo? Glad to see you back from planet weird. -smile-
Gojyo: -mad- Meh!! What do you want?
Dokugakuji:-in funny Italian voice- To fight you.
Gojyo: Fine. -starts fighting Dokugaku-
Kougaiji: WAKE UP!! -twitch-
-Goku wakes up-
Goku: -yawn- Huh? What? (still sleepy)
Kougaiji: Finally. Get up. -throws Goku out of jeep-
Goku: Ow! That hurt!!
Kougaiji: I don't care. I've been trying to get you up for 45 minutes!! Now, fight me before I get REALLY pissed off.
Goku: Fine, fine. Sorry. I didn't know I'm here to fight you whenever YOU feel like it. Gosh! -starts to fight Kougaiji-
-Yaone is still gazing at Kougaiji-
Hakkai: Miss Yaone? -waves hand in front of her face- Are you there?
Yaone: Hmmmm? Oh! Sorry, Hakkai-san. -blushes for she thinks he noticed what she was doing (he didn't)-
Hakkai: That's okay. -smiles- Well, It looks like everyone else is fighting; why don't we?
Yaone: Yes! Of course. -smiles and starts to fight Hakkai-
-Sanzo(still sleeping) slowly falls out of jeep landing on his head then flipping over-
Hakuryu: Kyu?
-Sanzo starts snoring-
Hakuryu: -you're an idiot tone- Kyu. -turns into dragon and flies up in a tree and lands on a branch-
Mysterious voice: (he's in the forest watching them) Hmmmmm. Well, isn't this wonderful. The Sanzo Party are fighting Kougaiji-sama, good. He can wear them out for me. -evil laughter- I hope they know what's coming for them. -continues evil laugher-
-Hakuryu flies over and craps on him-
Hakuryu: -mockingly- Kyu, Kyu, Kyu. flies away
Mysterious voice: Darn you, you horrible bird!! Hmph. That bird tainted my jacket. You will pay!!
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To be continued in chapter 2!!
Urasai: Valentines Day
Goku: Hey, Hakkai? What day is today?
Hakkai: It's February 14th.
Goku: You mean, it's Valentines Day!! Hurrah!! -runs into bedroom-
Sanzo: I hate Valentines Day. -opens newspaper-
Hakkai: Oh, it's not that bad. -smiles-
Gojyo: VALENTINES DAY!!
-phone rings-
Gojyo: DON'T ANSWER IT!! It's my old girlfriends!!
Hakkai: Oh. -backs away from phone-
Goku: c-omes out of bedroom in a giant heart outfit; throwing petals everywhere, skipping- Happy Valentines Day everyone! smiles
Gojyo: -shocked- Holy-!
Sanzo: Gasp. -continues to read newspaper-
Hakkai: -shocked- Goodness.
Sanzo: And that's why I hate Valentines Day.
-Goku skips around singing songs-
-answering machine turns on-
Gojyos' girlfriends: WE LOVE YOU GOJYO!! OMG!! EEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKK!! GOJYO!! I LOVE YOUOOOOOOOO-!!
-Gojyo rips cord out-
Gojyo: Man, that's annoying.