Dear Luluko

I count my lucky stars that I am able to write this letter to you, but I prey to our god that you receive it. Ever since I left to the battlefield, I always dream of having you in my arms once more as we watch the sun set from our garden that is hopefully, still filled with roses.

If only we could go back to those days, just once more. I don't wish to taint your mind with these scarring thoughts, but please just listen to me. I need to tell someone, I can barely stand having all these rants cooped up inside my head.

The trenches that I stay in is a cold, lifeless place where I can only hear the panicked screams and the desperate, agonizing cries. The whiz of gas bombs always greet my ears... Do you remember Gino? A person whom we called a friend? Do you remember him? The one who always came around with Anya..?

I am so sorry. I tried to help him- save him in fact, I swear I did. But I don't know what happened to him... People change too subtly. One day, they're fine, but the next... No one knows. They seam out of it in a way. He changed for the worse. Sometimes, in the middle of an attack, he would just stop working and just stand there, as if he saw a ghost. I had to throw his gas mask on him once. It was too close. He almost died that day.

The trenches are filled with mud to the brim. Slugging through it was like walking through honey. All wrapped around your legs, as if it was begging you to stay with it. Half of the people there were already insane... But I always think of you, your my light of sanity here.

I mentioned the gas bombs before, didn't I? Well, I know how you always love how I would go in to depth... But this time, I feel like I shouldn't. They were just a whiz of a noise at the beginning. Like a pesky fly. But then, the noise goes louder and louder. And then, everyone is already panicking, fumbling their masks on for the sake of their lives. At that moment, it showed how selfish everyone was. But I can hardly blame them. They only cared for their own survival, no one else mattered.

I still remember this one person. Don't you? I believe his name was Rivilz. He had navy hair and matching eyes. It was on one of the gas attacks that it happened. I was busy placing on my own mask that I didn't see him. But when I did, it was too late. He was on the floor, clutching his heart as I tried to help him. But to be honest, I didn't even know what was I doing. Screaming in agony, his cries still haunt me every time. That's why I need you here, with me.

I remember how you panicked this one time when I had lice in my hair. Don't you? But now, it's not avoidable. The clothes were never washed. As soon as a person dies, we just tear off his clothing and try to salvage it for ourselves. Especially during winter months, as well as autumn. Nits littered into the fabric as well as anywhere they could find.

And they weren't the only creatures there. I still remember that time vividly. A massive maroon rat, nibbling at a dead, human corpse. Tamaki, I believe his name was. The riot that it caused. Every took out their guns and tried to shoot the damned rat. Needless to say, the whole place was a tip at the end. But it was already one from the beginning.

The stench of the place was horrible. Dead, rotting corpse, animals and humans. There were no toilets here, and we still have the horses. I always felt nauseous. We never get to bathe and the clothes never get washed. It's a wonder how I haven't passed out because of that, right? Though maybe it's because my nose is getting numb, if that is even possible. But I still want to smell the roses with you, once again.

I don't want to scar you no longer. I just want to say I miss you, I love you. I just hope you will know it's me when I come back. You better be safe, I don't want this letter going to an empty house. Make sure that the children is alright and tell them that daddy loves them... I am not crying while writing this, no that was just a lie. Luluko, I love you, and I beg to each and every god out there... I beg that this war will be over soon.

Love from your ever loving husband, Suzaku. xxx

And before I go, remember to tell the kids that I love them. I am sure you will make sure that they will behave, but don't be too harsh on them.

This is just a first draft of the thing I have to do in my English class. It was meant to be a letter from a solider in the Somme Battle to a loved one or family. So at the end, I made Suzaku write to his wife, Luluko and their kids! xD Anyway, I own nothing, and please point out the mistakes for me if you wish to ^-^"

Last of all, I am so sorry I have not updated, but I just had my Biology test, Home Economics test, I have a ton of maths homework due and I need to practice my french and German. Then there is also this essay that I am currently writing in English and another essay I might need to redraft. I still have English homework and I need to write a story about a run away's life for drama... Geez... v.v"