Summary: Serious Katniss learns about life and love from her chess club partner, Peeta Mellark. Modern AU written for round 3 of Prompts in Panem, Day 3 (Modern Locations).
Visual prompt: Cemetery
AN: The last scene is the excerpt I originally published for PiP. My back story got away from me as I was writing, and in order to make the timeframe, I cut the first part out of my PiP entry. Now that I've had time to properly edit, I've published the full story.
Katniss was always a worrier.
As a child, most sentences began with "What if… " and ended with some version of the future involving death, humiliation or some other terrible tragedy.
"What if the school bus crashes and flips over on the way to school? We don't have any seatbelts."
"What if the dentist finds a whole bunch of cavities when I go for my checkup?"
"What if I fail my history test, and flunk the class, and get held back a grade?"
Of course, the things she worried about never came to fruition. The school bus never had so much as a fender bender in all her years riding it. She remained blissfully cavity-free throughout her childhood and into her teens. And she was basically an A student every semester.
No, her worries got her nowhere, she gradually came to realize. Life – or fate, or destiny - loved to dish out surprises. Life didn't want you to get complacent and think you could predict the next turn of events. It liked to keep you on your toes.
Like the year her father passed away unexpectedly from an aneurysm. As a twelve-year-old, she had not yet entertained worries about ever losing her parents. That was an unfathomable idea – that there was even a chance they would not always be there. And yet, it happened. On some level she blamed herself for not considering it a possibility. Perhaps if she had worried about it ahead of time, she would not have been so utterly unprepared.
Still, she drew her shoulders tight and moved forward. What else could she do? She stepped in almost instantly as a second parent to her younger sister, Prim. Their mother threw herself into her work as a tech at a nearby 24-hour pharmacy. She nearly always took the overnight shifts – partly for the extra pay, but probably to avoid home, and the painful memories it held, as much as possible. She'd come home in the early hours of the morning and fall into a fitful sleep on the couch, covered in an old afghan their grandmother had crocheted years ago. She never set foot in her old bedroom anymore. As the months went by, Katniss took on the responsibility to make sure Prim's dinner and homework were taken care of, while her mother slept obliviously only ten feet away. It might as well have been miles.
And still, she worried. Maybe, possibly, she worried more. She didn't want to be caught unprepared again.
School became an escape for her, but also a new source of pressure. She wasn't just aiming to succeed. She had to excel. Her mother made decent money at the pharmacy, but her father had left them with no life insurance, and thousands of dollars in debt from her parents own schooling, and a mortgage, and the piles of credit card bills that had funded their piece of the American dream. College was her only hope for a stable, secure future, and scholarships were her only hope for college.
High school was a blur of honors and AP courses, anything she could do to get and maintain the highest GPA possible. She worried about her grades, worried they wouldn't be good enough to make her stand out above the crowd. But she didn't think to worry that even the best grades in the world wouldn't be enough on their own.
"So what are your extracurricular activities?" her guidance counselor, Miss Trinket, asked her one afternoon in their biannual meeting. Katniss scowled at her blankly. "Huh?"
"Your after school activities, dear. You know… academic clubs. Social clubs. Sports teams. What are you doing to enrich your life outside of the classroom?"
She could only shake her head in defeat. Enrich her life? Most days she was just trying to survive it. She had to take care of her sister and maintain her own grades on top of it. Who had time after all of that to be thinking about silly things like clubs and sports?
"I just want you to be prepared when it comes time to apply for college. This is a big, big year for you, Katniss. You're an excellent student, but these days, colleges want the whole package. They want a well-rounded person who will bring something special to their campus." Miss Trinket smiled at her kindly. "Think about it, Katniss. You're a brilliant girl, and I just want the odds to be in your favor."
As she helped Prim with her homework that night, she did think about it. Sports were definitely off the list; there was no way she could squeeze in the time for practices and potential travel to games. Social clubs were also immediately eliminated, as she assumed they'd require her to be, well, social. She was book smart but completely lacking in the skills needed to get by in one of those clubs.
She dismissed the math club, the writing club, and several others before coming upon the perfect idea: chess club. Her father had taught her to play years ago, and she had taken to it almost instantly. Even better, chess allowed one time to focus on the board, to take long silences, and required almost no speaking at all. It was perfect.
The following Tuesday afternoon she lingered outside room 12, trying to get the nerve to go inside. The halls had long since emptied, and she was enjoying the solitude for a few minutes beside the closed door. She fumbled through her backpack one more time, looking for a piece of gum, a mint – anything to settle her nervous twitch. Finding nothing, she let out a deep sigh and turned around quickly, resigned to just DO this already. She immediately smashed into something solid. A body.
"Oof! I'm so sorry Katniss!" For some reason, the solid mass was apologizing to her. What was someone doing lingering in this hallway? And how did it know her name?
"I'm fine… I just – oh. Hi." Finally looking up, she saw a mess of ashy blond hair and a pair of cool blue eyes looking down at her. Peeta Mellark.
She had no idea how he knew her name, but of course she knew his – everyone did. Peeta was an anomaly, somehow popular with every group of students in school. He was on the wrestling team, one of the least followed sports, but was still friends with the jocks that played football and baseball. His grades never slipped, though, and he was well known in the honors courses and as part of the afterschool quiz team. He even helped out with the school play every year; while he couldn't sing, dance or act, he painted scenery and helped sell tickets to their winter chorale production. He seemed to be everywhere at once, and always with that same bright smile on his face that she saw looking down at her now.
Afer reviewing her mental list, Katniss scowled at the thought that she knew more than just his name.
He handed her a book she had dropped. "I'm just heading in to chess club. Coach Abernathy was poking around at practice, trying to get volunteers to boost the group's numbers, so I thought I'd give it a try. How about you?"
"Uh. The same."
"Coach Abernathy got you, too?" He smiled a lopsided grin at her, and she frowned back, still not sure how to read him.
"Uh, no. Just looking to, um, branch out a bit."
"Well, you've found just the place! It's a great group. Come on, I'll introduce you to everyone." He held the door expectantly for her, waiting for her to go first. With a sigh, she headed in. So much for a nice quiet hour. It seemed with Peeta around, there would be no silence to be found.
But surprisingly, the hour flew by quickly. There were a few familiar faces, and Peeta introduced her to some of the others, but seemed to read her body language when she had had too much. He led her over to a table by the windows and set up a game for the two of them. They talked companionably in between moves, and she found herself feeling more and more at ease.
When the time came for club to dismiss, they were in the middle of their third round, tied at a game apiece. "Want to call it a draw?" he asked, getting his backpack ready.
"Sure." She smiled and started packing up the pieces of the game. "Thanks for taking it easy on me, Peeta. I'm sure you could tell, but I'm a bit rusty."
"Really? I couldn't tell, honest. You beat me fair and square, I promise. When's the last time you played?"
She looked down and fumbled with the end of her braid. "Quite a few years ago. Not since my dad…" She didn't finish the sentence, but he knew. Everyone knew. Losing a parent so young in a town this small, you tend to be the subject of rumors and gossip across all households.
"Oh…" His blue eyes grew wide with understanding. "Well, I think he'd be so proud of you, Katniss. And he was obviously a great teacher. You're incredible." His voice dropped a little at the end of his sentence, and when she looked up at him, she almost thought he was blushing.
She convinced herself she was mistaken when he seemed to shake something off and his usual smile returned. "So, do you need a ride home?"
Katniss quickly shook her head. Chatting with Peeta Mellark in chess club was one thing, but being stuck in a car with him, alone, was more than she could handle right now. "Oh, no, thanks. I'm all set. I'm taking the late bus. "
"Come on! I won't bite. Besides, the late bus won't be here for another half hour. By the time it gets here, I could already have you home to your sister."
Her eyes crinkled in confusion. "How do you know about my sister?"
"Katniss, we've gone to school together for a long time. And I… I notice things. I bet I know a lot more about you than you realize." He gave her a slight wink. "Besides, I've seen your sister at my parents' bakery from time to time. She loves to check out the cakes."
"Oh." She wasn't sure why that wink gave her stomach flutters, but she was relieved to hear Peeta knew Prim from her bakery visits. He wasn't paying attention to her, "noticing" her. She was sure he was just joking when he said that.
Trying to keep the mood light, she decided to accept his offer. "Fine. You can bring me home. But I'll give you gas money."
"Nope. That, my friend, is a deal breaker. I drive right by your neighborhood on my way home. I will not accept a penny for something I'd have to do anyway. Deal?"
Sighing, she rolled her eyes and nodded. "Fine. Deal."
He gave her a smile that she swore would split his face in two, and led her to his car in the parking lot.
The ride home was a little more subdued than their time in chess club. Peeta was focused on the road, and Katniss was on edge from being in such close proximity to him. She couldn't think of anything to talk about, so she just trained her eyes out the passenger window, willing the ride to end quickly.
"How about some tunes? Any requests?" She shook her head, deferring to him to pick the music.
"Alrighty, how about some classic rock…" He tuned the radio for a minute until he found a song he liked. "Ah, Meatloaf! You a fan?"
She chuckled back at him. "Sure." She went back to staring out the window while listening to the lyrics.
I want you
I need you
But there ain't no way I'm ever gonna love you
Now don't be sad
Two out of three ain't bad
"Such a sad song, isn't it?" Peeta's words took her out of her daze and she turned to look at him.
"What do you mean?"
"It's just … I feel sorry for them, you know? He's clearly had his heart broken. And he's probably in love with the person he's singing to, but just doesn't realize it. Instead of taking a chance, they both lose out."
"Why would you say that? He's honestly saying that he's not in love with her, and never will be. If she can't handle that, it's her problem."
"Yeah, but he admits he wants her and needs her … What does he think love is, if not a desire to have someone around you, to want to be with them, to need them in your life?"
Katniss scoffed. "Please. Love is overrated."
Peeta turned from the road to look at her with an amazed expression. "Do you really believe that?"
"I do. Love is for sappy movies and novels, but it's not a practical emotion. It consumes people at its best, and breaks them at its worst." She couldn't help but think of her mother under that afghan on the couch. "I'm never falling in love."
For once, Peeta seemed speechless. He shrugged and turned back to the road. "I guess I'm just an old romantic. I always thought that love is what makes the rest of life worthwhile. When you're alone, the hard times can seem so overwhelming, but together, with someone you love, things just don't seem as bad."
She looked at him silently, wondering what hard times he'd experienced. She never saw him without a smile on his face or a kind word to share. What did he know about how dark life could be?
Eventually they pulled up to her house and he put the car in park. Lost in her thoughts, she hadn't given him directions, but somehow he knew exactly where to bring her. Her head was still swimming with all that had happened this afternoon; she couldn't dwell on what that might mean.
"Well, Katniss Everdeen. Thanks for letting me bring you home this afternoon." His blue eyes twinkled as he gave her a bright smile.
She chuckled and shook her head again. "Shouldn't I be thanking you?"
"No, definitely not. I was the fortunate one today. I got to spend some time with you and get to know you better. I am definitely indebted to you."
There was no reasoning with him, so she just smiled back. "If you say so, Peeta. But thank you, anyway."
As she got out of the car, he shouted out to her, "See you at school tomorrow!" She just waved and walked away. Extracurricular activities, indeed.
But as the months went on, Katniss began to look forward to chess club every week. She and Peeta had a standing appointment to play against each other, and she realized she was honing her skills at the game as well as her skills in conversation. She found herself opening up to him more and more each week, both while they played and as he drove her home afterwards. Peeta's easygoing smile and positive attitude made all the pressures in her life fade into the background for a few hours.
But in letting her guard down, she lost focus on her worries. And Life, as usual, stepped in to remind her.
One Friday after school, she arrived home to find a note from her mother. "Meet us at the hospital. Prim is being admitted."
After a scramble to catch the right bus, Katniss hurried into Prim's hospital room and tried to assess the situation. Her sister was fine, in one piece, but was dressed in a hospital gown and hooked up to an IV. Their mother sat at her bedside reading a book. "What's going on? Prim, are you okay?"
"I'm fine Katniss… Really, I'm okay."
"What happened?" She looked to their mother, willing her to fill in the details.
"Prim had her physical today, and while we were there, she mentioned she hasn't been feeling well recently; she's been tired, and really thirsty no matter how much water she drank. When the doctor checked her blood sugar, they found it was extremely elevated."
Katniss looked between her mother and Prim, still confused. "So what does that mean? Prim hardly eats any sweets."
"It's not a matter of sweets, Katniss. Prim has diabetes. Her body isn't breaking down sugars like it's supposed to."
"So what does this mean? Does she need some medicine? An operation? What?" Her mother's calm demeanor was really starting to irritate her.
"This is something she's going to have to live with for the rest of her life. She'll be in the hospital for a couple of days while they regulate her blood sugar and teach her about injections, then they'll send her for outpatient training on how to use an insulin pump. That will help supply her body with the insulin it no longer makes."
Katniss looked over at Prim in the hospital bed. She looked so pale and thin; how had she not noticed she was so ill? Why had she not realized something terrible was happening again? "Can someone stay here with her?"
"Yes, one parent or family member can sleep at her bedside, so I'll –"
"No." Katniss interrupted firmly. "I'm going to stay." She looked at her mother, daring her to challenge her.
"Katniss, I'm her mother. I don't want to put that burden on you."
"See that's the difference between the two of us. I don't look at it as a burden." Her mother flinched at her tone, so she tried to lighten it. "I'm staying. Tomorrow is Saturday anyway, so I won't miss any school."
Seeing that the argument was over, her mother nodded silently. Prim sat in her hospital bed, watching the two of them uncomfortably. "So, I saw Peeta Mellark earlier. Isn't he your friend from chess club?"
Katniss looked at Prim, confused. "Peeta? Where did you see him?"
"In the parking lot. He introduced himself to us, and gave us directions to the admitting department. He seems like a nice boy."
A nice boy. Yes, he was nice. A nice diversion from reality. Katniss didn't have time to think about Peeta right now. She needed to get focused again on her family. She'd let herself get off track for too long. It was time to start directing her worries towards the right things.
The next morning, Katniss padded down to the patient kitchen to grab an orange juice. On her way back to Prim's room, she could hear voices, and a soft chuckle. "… Well, the first time I gave him an injection, he insisted that I did it better than anyone else, and that I had to do it all the time. I became quite the pro."
"Peeta," she said grumpily, shocked to see him in her sister's room. He turned to smile at her in the doorway, and she realized she was wearing her flannel pants and t-shirt, her hair thrown up in a messy ponytail. She absently ran her hands to her head in a pointless attempt to smooth it. "What are you doing here?"
"Well I was just in the neighborhood and thought I'd check in young Primrose here." He smiled at Prim, who chuckled and blushed slightly. "I was just telling her that my older brother Brian is a diabetic, too, diagnosed when he was just about her age. He'd be happy to answer any questions, and I've become a bit of an expert myself, if you guys need anything."
She didn't know why, but his presumption that she would need him irritated her. She came into the room with a huff and put the juice down on the table. "Well thanks for the offer, Peeta, but we're really all set. We'll be just fine on our own."
"Katniss!" Prim's voice was sharp in response to Katniss's cool declaration. "Peeta was just being nice. There's nothing wrong with getting a little help."
The sisters stared at each other stubbornly for a minute until Peeta broke the silence. "Well, ahem…" He rubbed his palms on his jeans and stood up. "It was lovely visiting with you Prim, but I should probably get going." He gave Katniss a sheepish smile and headed toward the hallway. "I guess I'll see you in school, Katniss."
She followed him to the doorway, still baffled by his appearance here of all places. "Peeta, what are you doing here?"
"I told you, I was in the neighborhood and thought I'd check in on a friend. That's not a crime, is it?" He winked at her slightly like he did that first day of chess club. When she felt the familiar butterflies in her stomach, she reacted the only way she knew how. Anger.
"You know, we don't need your pity, Peeta. We're just fine on our own, and we'll get through this together. So you can just go back to your cushy life and the happy-go-lucky bubble you live in and leave us alone."
As soon as the words left her mouth, she regretted them. Peeta's smile fell from his face, and she felt horrible when she saw sadness briefly flicker in his normally sparkling eyes. He simply nodded once and turned to walk away. She wanted to call out to stop him, but she figured it was probably for the best anyway. She didn't have room in her life right now for a distraction like him.
Prim was discharged the next day, and the sisters adjusted to the routine of injections, late night blood sugar checks, and juice boxes to handle unexpected lows. Despite her desire to stay home with Prim, Katniss returned to school and tried to get back to focusing on her studies.
She decided that she needed to quit the chess club for now. Prim needed her home more than she needed some silly club to put on her college applications. She'd think of something else to make herself look well-rounded when the time came.
She headed to room 12 after school to let them know she wouldn't be coming anymore. She looked around the room nervously for Peeta; she wouldn't admit it out loud, but he was another reason she wanted to quit. She just couldn't face him every week knowing how mean she had been to him at the hospital.
"He's not here, sweetheart." A gruff voice pulled her away from the faces in the classroom. She turned to see Coach Abernathy with his feet planted on the teacher's desk holding a novel. "Excuse me?"
"Blondie. That's who you're lookin' for, isn't it? He's not here today."
She was confused when she felt both relieved and disappointed. "Oh. We'll I'm not here for him. I came to tell you I can't be part of the club anymore. Too many family obligations."
He chuckled and put his hands behind his head. "Hmph. Family obligations. Is that so? Well, that's up to you sweetheart. You're free to go whenever you want. Just never pegged you as a quitter."
Who was this man, and how dare he judge her? He didn't even know her. "Thank you but I am NOT a quitter. I just have people that need me at home."
"Didja ever consider you might have people that need you here, too?" He laughed at some joke only he got and took his feet off the desk. "Ah, go on and leave. Go home where you're needed." He waved his hand as if to dismiss her and went back to his book.
She scoffed at his presumptions and turned to leave the room. As she got into the hallway, she was stopped by a hand on her arm. "Katniss?" Turning, she saw a crown of golden blond curls and a flash of a cheerleader uniform. She recognized Delly, one of Peeta's friends. He had introduced them her first day in the club.
"Uh, hi Delly. What's up?" She tried her best to be social, but couldn't understand what this girl wanted with her.
"It's about Peeta. I just wasn't sure if you'd heard."
"Heard what?"
Delly looked down at the flood sadly. "About his dad. He died yesterday. He's been sick for a long time now. He had a brain tumor. They thought he beat it a few years ago, but it came back earlier this year. He's been in the hospital for a few months, and he passed away last night."
Katniss' stomach dropped. His father died? She thought back to their interaction in the hospital. Is that why he was there? To visit his dad? She felt worse than ever.
"How is he doing?" Her voice was almost a whisper. She knew what it was like to lose a parent, and she hated to think of Peeta – kind, friendly Peeta - going through all that.
"He's okay. His mom's not the … warmest person around, but he's got his brothers, and they're all pretty close. He'll be alright."
Katniss remembered his mom from the few times she had met her at the bakery and at school events. The woman was cold, with a hard stare and a sharp tongue. She never heard a kind word from her. She supposed Peeta got his bubbly personality from his father. Who was now gone.
"Anyway, I wanted to make sure you knew. A bunch of us are going to the funeral together, and I wanted to know if you wanted to join us."
"Oh, no, I couldn't…" Just the thought of a funeral made her sick to her stomach. It brought her back to her father's, the last one she had attended, and she knew she couldn't go through all of that again; the smells of the funeral home, the long receiving line, the near-constant tears.
"Please, Katniss. I know it's hard for you, but it would really mean a lot to him. He talks about you all the time, and I know he really values your friendship."
She was more confused than ever, and plagued with conflicting emotions. Guilt. Surprise. Concern. "I'll think about it. Thanks for letting me know." She gave the blond a tight smile and headed home.
Her head was swimming all evening as she thought over what Delly said. He talked about her? Why? She had to admit she had grown to enjoy their time together because of the sunshine he brought to her day. But what did she bring to his? She could barely muster up a smile most days, never mind conversation.
It was going to be hard, but she knew she had to be there for him.
The air was thick with humidity and a fog drifted low amongst the headstones. Everything about the atmosphere was heavy - full of rain, of tears, of grief -just waiting to be released.
Katniss stood off to the edge of the congregation. She was an outsider, not really belonging here with the family and close friends that had known and loved Mr. Mellark when he was alive. But she was here for one person only, for Peeta, she continued to remind herself.
She couldn't bring herself to go to the funeral home for the wake or service. There were too many memories there for her, and as much as she had come to care for Peeta, she couldn't move past them just yet. She decided instead to attend the burial and pay her respects for his father there. True, it was the same cemetery where they had buried her father, but somehow it was okay. Despite the somber mood, there was something comforting about being outdoors, under the oaks and maples, the scent of the grass reminiscent of springtime and the rebirth it brought.
As the minister spoke traditional prayers and words of comfort, she looked around the crowd. Peeta's mother sat in a chair at the center of the group. Her face was stoic, staring straight ahead, devoid of emotion. Everything about her was her immaculate; her make-up perfectly applied; her hair coiffed without a single one out of place; her black dress and jacket crisp, not a wrinkle or muss to be seen.
Her boys were the complete opposite. They stood behind her, struggling for composure. Peeta's middle brother was sobbing openly on his oldest brother's shoulder, leaving tear stains on his jacket. Their collars were unbuttoned to loosened ties; the bottoms of their pants wet from the dewy grass.
She located Peeta beside them, staring at the casket, eyes puffy and red, but dry. His blond curls were disheveled as though he'd been running his hands through them all day. She was confused by the strong urge she felt to go to him, to tame his curls with her fingers, to simply be by his side and hold his hand. It was unfamiliar; an instinct to do something she'd never done before.
Finally, the service ended and the crowd began to disperse. Mrs. Mellark headed for the limo immediately, without a backward glance to the box that held her husband. The boys sauntered behind her, with the exception of Peeta. He maintained his stance at the side of the casket, staring blankly at the bouquet of flowers at the top. His cheeks remained dry, but his eyes brimmed with unshed tears.
They were alone now, and her footfalls were silent as she made her way closer to him. "Peeta?"
Her voice seemed to wake him out of his daze. He turned to look at her, his blue eyes taking time to focus, to take in his surroundings and the girl standing before him. They crinkled slightly with a hint of a smile. "You came."
"Of course I came." She gently touched his forearm with her right hand. "I wanted to tell you how sorry I am. For the fight we had last week… for your father… for … everything."
He looked down at the hand on his arm, and the slight smile in his eyes spread to his mouth. He put his own right hand on hers and turned it as though to shake it. But instead of movement, he gripped it tightly in his own, solid and steady. "Apology accepted. And completely unnecessary." His blue eyes locked on hers with an intensity that she could feel in the pit of her stomach. But for once, she couldn't look away.
He looked back to the casket, at the photo of his father standing beside it. "Sometimes, I just ask myself, 'is this all real? Is this really happening?'" He spoke softly, almost in a whisper.
"It's real, Peeta. I'm sorry, but yes. It's real." She wasn't good with words, and didn't know what to say, but she knew from her own experience that denial was a normal phase of the grieving process.
Looking around at the empty chairs, he turned back to face her. "Guess we're the last ones. How about a little walk?"
"What, here?" she said. "Around the cemetery?"
"Sure. It's peaceful here. There's a reception back at the bakery, but I just… I need some time before I can go back and deal with all that." He looked down at their hands, still locked together. "What do you say?"
She slowly let go and dropped her hands to her sides. "Sure. Let's walk."
Normally nimble, she stumbled a little in her heels as they stepped across the uneven terrain. Ever the gentleman, he offered her his arm to hold onto, and she looped her arm through after a second divot almost sent her crashing into him. With their closeness she could smell his soap, and the essence of yeast and cinnamon that clung to his clothes. She realized how familiar this scent had become after their months spending more time together, riding together in his car, and how much she had missed it when they were apart.
She walked quietly beside him, in a comfortable silence, letting him lead. Comforting was not her strong point, but this, she could do. She could be there for him, with him, as long as he needed her.
After a few minutes, he came to a stop. "Why are we stopping?" she asked, looking around at the now familiar area. He had walked her to her father's grave. "How did you know where…?"
Peeta rubbed his free hand over the back of his neck. "I told you, it's peaceful here. Sometimes when things get … crazy at home or I just need time to think, I come here and walk around."
"Have you come here before?" she pointed at the "Everdeen" carved on his simple stone.
He shrugged. "Sometimes. I mean, I already knew where to go…."
Because he was there. How had she forgotten? He had been at her father's funeral, all those years ago. She, Prim, her mother, they had all been half asleep that week, shocked by the sudden passing of their father, their rock. But looking back, she could remember Peeta coming to pay his respects. Enveloping her in a surprising hug and telling her he was sorry. He had hurried away before she could say anything, and that evening, when they returned from the restaurant, she found a loaf of bread on her doorstep that she knew had to come from him.
"I'm sorry. I forgot you were there. It was an overwhelming time."
"Don't mention it. I just thought you might want to say hello. Our dads will be neighbors now." He smiled ruefully at her and looked at the ground. "I know, probably an inappropriate joke right now…"
She smiled at him. "No, you're right. I bet my dad is getting the recipe for cheese buns from your dad right now. They were always his favorite."
"Is that why they're your favorite, too?" he asked.
"How do you know they're my favorite?" She looked at him suspiciously. He simply chuckled and gave her his now-familiar friendly wink. "Ah Miss Everdeen, you forget. I've been paying attention."
Yes. He had been paying attention. He knew her favorite foods, her favorite bands, the flavor gum she preferred. But more, he knew her. Her discomfort in crowds of people, her cynical side when it came to love and romance, her fierce love for her sister. He knew the good and the bad, and for some reason, still wanted to be near her. She may never figure out why, but for now, she was content not to question anymore.
"How do you do it Peeta?" she asked in a quiet voice.
He looked at her, confusion evident on his face. "Do what?"
"How do you keep such a positive attitude? Your dad has been sick for months, you've been spending all your free time in hospitals, with all this stress hanging over you… yet you still find it in you to have a smile on your face and a kind word to say to everyone. How can you stand it?"
"Love," he said simply. "Love is how I stand it."
"I don't understand."
"Life is hard, I'm the first to admit it. But if you get bogged down by all the hard, you'll miss all the wonderful parts in between. Like a chess game with a good friend. A walk with a pretty girl. A delicious cheese bun…"
"Very funny."
"Seriously, Katniss. This world is full of so many wonderful things. My dad told me every day to hold tight to the things that make you happy," he gripped her arm harder, "and to let go of the things that drag you down. So that's what I try to do. It's pretty simple if you think about it."
He was looking at her again with that look, the one that seemed to bore into her soul. She gave him a slight nod and broke her eyes away.
Poking at his chest she said, "Ahem. So what if I said that I knew your favorite food is iced cinnamon buns? In fact, I'm willing to wager you had one for breakfast this morning."
"Well, well. A betting woman… And just what are you willing to put on the line for this little challenge?"
The answer came to her instantly. My heart. She was ready to risk her heart with this man standing before her. There were no guarantees, and life was going to continue to throw curveballs at her, but somehow, she knew she'd be able to handle them with him by her side.
"Well, we'll just have to see, now won't we?" Her version of flirting was pathetically green, but the smile on his face told her he didn't care.
"Sounds like a deal," he said. "So… How did you get here? Do you need a ride home?"
"Actually, I had a hankering for cheese buns. I thought maybe… I'd come with you to the reception at the bakery? I mean, if you wanted me to…"
"I'd love you, I mean…I'd love for you to come with me. But Katniss, are you sure?"
She trailed her hand down to his and held it –not for a handshake, not to steady herself from falling, but just to hold it. "Yes, Peeta. I'm sure."
"Well, we should probably get going then… Together?"
As they walked back to his car, she noticed that the fog had begun to burn off, and a hint of the sun was peeking through the clouds.
"Yes. Together."
AN: Song excerpt is the classic Two Out of Three Ain't Bad by Meatloaf.
Thanks for reading!