Once upon a time, there was a happy family that lived together in a big house.
They had a beautiful son named Mello.
However, the mother became ill and died.
The father was forced to remarry, or else they would lose the house.
"Oh, by the way, Mello, I married again."
"lol 'Kay."
He married a rich, but evil woman named Kujo, who had two ugly sons named A and B.
They made fun of Mello and treated him cruelly.
Mello had known they were evil from the very start.
"Dad, I think they're evil."
"lol 'Kay."
One day, the father had to leave to help the mafia, which meant he would have to leave Mello with the evil stepfamily.
The family wished the father a safe trip.
"When are you gonna come back?" Mello asked.
"Oh, you know…" The father answered, "Maybe in a year or two."
"FFFF- But they're evil!"
"Oh, don't be silly! Do they look evil to you?" The father pointed, and the stepfamily waved innocently.
And then the father left.
From then on, the stepfamily was even crueler to Mello.
B took his room, and made him sleep in the cellar right next to A, forcing him, to have to listen to A's depressing poetry.
And the called him Cindermello.
"Cindermello! Clean the living room!"
"Cindermello! Take care of the plants!"
"Cindermello! The computer crashed!"
"Cindermello! Get rid of this body for me before the cops see it!"
"Cindermello! …Tell me a bed time story?"
Cindermello was forced to do all the work around the house like a slave.
Though he had to admit, he told the most epic stories.
It didn't matter what the stepfamily put him through, Cindermello could always count on his friends.
"Don't worry! I'll always be here for you!" Said a mouse named Linda.
"Dammit, I thought I called pest control a month ago!" Mello threw her out the window, then shutting it so he wouldn't have to listen to her screams.
One day a letter came from the door.
When Cindermello read it, it was an invitation to the Prince Near's ball!
"More spam?" Mello was about to throw it out when B tackled him.
"DON'T THROW THIS OU- …Wait, this isn't that porn magazine I ordered. Never mind!" B was about to throw it out when A tackled him.
"Don't throw this ou- …Oh, this isn't that Chicken Soup for the Teenage Boy Going Through Hard Time's Soul book I ordered." A was about to put it back into the mail box when Kujo tackled him.
"Don't throw that out! …It the invite to the prince's ball!" Kujo hugged the letter, like the fangirl she was.
"Ball? Pfff!" Mello rolled his eyes.
"And I know what you're thinking, Cindermello!"
"You do?"
"Yes! You can't go to the ball because you're too ugly!"
"That's not what I was thinking at all."
Kujo read the letter. "And… This ball is how the prince will choose his bride!"
"Aren't you already married?"
"Shuddap, I mean my boys!"
"I'm not gay!" B snapped.
"You'll make mommy proud!"
"BUT I'M NOT GAY!"
Cindermello had to work twice as hard, cleaning formal wear and making sure everything would be perfect for the ball, which drew closer and closer.
Soon it was the night of the ball.
"Now, Cindermello, I know what you're thinking." Kujo said, as mean as possible.
"You do?"
"Yes! I MIGHT let you go to the ball, IF you can get this WHOLE house clean!" She laughed wickedly.
"You know I don't actually want to go, right?"
"And to make it even worse, I've even destroyed the dress you were going to wear!"
"…I'm not a girl. And when did I have a dress?"
"What happened to my dress?" A could be heard from another room.
The stepfamily left for the ball, leaving Cindermello completely alone, where he happily pigged out on his secret chocolate stash.
It was then when the Fairy Godmother, Matt appeared.
"Tadaaa!" Matt twirled around.
"WHO ARE YOU, AND HOW DID YOU GET INTO MY HOUSE?" Mello got out a gun and shot at him.
"WHAAH, YOU ALMOST SHOT ME!"
"THAT WAS KINDA THE POINT! WHO ARE YOU, ANYWAY?"
"I am your fairy godmother! My name is Matt."
"A fairy godmother? What am I, Cinderella?"
"Anyway." Matt took a smoke, and coughed. "S-So I heard you wanted to go to the ball!"
"Why does everybody think that?"
"And so, in order to go, you'll need a new dress and carriage!"
"What? NO!"
Matt spun around and tapped his wand on the table. "Bippity, Boppity, Boo!"
He took a smoke and blew it all over Cindermello.
Cindermello coughed and coughed and when the smoke disappeared, he was wearing a Miku Hatsune cosplay.
"…What the heck is THIS?"
"MIKUMIKUMIKU!" Matt spun around happily.
"Get this off of me!"
"Now for a carriage…"
"Forget that, I want you out of my house, before I call the cops!"
"…I don't have a carriage, so you can have this!" Matt blew out more smoke, and Cindermello was then sitting on the Nyan Cat.
"WHAT THE—"
"SEE YA!"
And then the Nyan Cat flew off into the night sky.
"Be back before midnight! That's when the Nyan Cat's song will end!"
"Isn't it only three minutes and thirty seven seconds?"
"It's the extended edition!"
"DAMN YOUUUUU!" Cindermello yelled as he flew off into the distance.
At the ball, Prince Near sat on the floor patiently, playing with his toys.
"No one special yet." He yawned, and ate some of his lego blocks.
"Okay, boys! Now's your chance!" Kujo pushed A and B over to Near.
"But mom, I'm not gay!" B begged.
"I wonder if his legos taste good." A smiled.
"Ugggg…"
"Isn't the prince only five years old, anyway?" B asked.
"He's 18."
"…What."
"I'm gonna kill that fairy next time I see him…" Cindermello grumbled as he walked down the steps, "Or her. I really don't know anymore."
"Is that the Nyan Cat song, I hear?" Near blinked.
He appeared right in front of Cindermello. "Nyan!"
"WHAA! HOW DID YOU GET THERE?"
"I found you, my love!" Near glomped Cindermello.
"…WHAT?"
"Oh, if you came here, then you must have wanted to marry me!"
"I'm a GUY, and I didn't even WANT to come here!"
"KISS ME!"
"…Screw the Nyan Cat song!"
Before Near could kiss Cindermello, he ran off and flew away on the Nyan Cat.
However, he dropped a glass boot, and Near managed to pick it up.
"Well… Naturally, I would start a whole quest to find the person who's foot fits, but I know the REAL way to solve life's problems!" Near made his famous creepy pedo smile, "Stalking!"
"Did you see Miku Hatsune and the prince yesterday?" A smiled as he talked endlessly to Cindermello the next day.
"How could I if I was here all night?" Cindermello held his head, trying to forget.
The doorbell then rang.
"Cindermello! Get the door!" Kujo called.
"Yeah, yeah!" Cindermello sighed and opened the door, only to see Prince Near.
"FFFF- HOW DID YOU FIND ME?"
"Well…" Near made his creepy smile, "After I finished kissing your shoe, I looked at the brand, then I phoned the people who made it, I got them to give me a full list of names, and after that, I simply chose the name that made my heart speed the most!"
"…..STALKER."
"Cindermello! What's going on?" Kujo came in and gasped, "Prince Near! What a pleasant surprise!"
"Hello, Miss. Kujo, I am here to take my love's hand in marriage!"
"What? NO!"
"Hmmm?" Kujo blinked.
"Don't let him take me!" Cindermello begged, "Please I beg of you!"
"Fine, you win this round, Cindermello!" Kujo made an epic pose.
"WHAT? NO! NO!"
"I'll love you forever, and ever, and ever, and EVER~!" Near sang.
"NOOOOO!"
Prince Near and Cindermello were then married, fifteen minutes later.
It was that very night that Cindermello went completely insane and killed the prince.
He became King Mello and plunged the world into the dark ages, ruling for several years.
He became known as the Evil Emperor from Star Wars.
The end.