Anyway, I played some video games; then went to the mall for bed shopping.

I went to some random store that had mattresses, people, and bed frames in it. The owner assisted me. He was kinda funny, and really nice.

He had green hair, just like mine. He was wearing some funny glasses that old people wear only when they're reading something.

He liked purple, just like me, and wore a nice purple jacket and green polo shirt underneath.

His face was freaky, he was Caucasian, but it looked like it was makeup.

He made a lot of funny jokes.

He sold me a nice bed. He also gave me some brand of candy that looked tasty, for free. Soy candy. No preservatives, perfect for people with my diet. It had a bunch of laughing mouths on it. It was called "Laugh it up!" candy.

I met his wife. She was pregnant. Her name was Harley.

Nothing else really happened that day.

____________________~___________________

"And, on another matter, Raven's emotions are scrambled. I had to break her special mirror."

The ends of his lips plummeted even further down.

"Then stay out of what I'm going to tell you."

"What do you mean?"

"It was dangerous. Now, with that scenario, it's extremely dangerous."

"What was the grim news again?"

Nothing could prepare me for what I was about to hear.

_______________________________________________________________________

No Laughing Matter

Hello, everyone.

Beast Boy here, with all the news and 411 on Titan Tower!

Well, let's see: I, being a spaz, randomly kissed Raven, triggering some spiritual mumbo jumbo in which her special mirror had to be broken, releasing her emotions into her FULL BLAST for five days. It's day five, Tuesday.

"Beast Boy! Get IN HERE!"

Yeah, that's Raven being emotionally possessed by my all-time favorite (not): Anger.

With this, I believe, she can do the impossible. With Anger, she can strike fear into the hearts of every mortal being. Oh wait, she does that all the time…

I really hope she didn't hear me say that.

I also really hope that we go out for tacos soon.

And why do boys who try to impress their girlfriends always go buy tampons for their girlfriends?

Okay, I know, that's gross and you didn't want to hear it, but Raven happens to be on her "special time", and I was the lucky soul to go shop for the utilities since they dubbed me "the boyfriend", as her PDABB (Public Displays of Affection to Beast Boy, pronounced "Puh-daab") ratings rocketed. Which leaves me the buyer.

So THANK YOU, SUPERSTAR MAGAZINE, for writing that article that diagnoses me with Gender Identity Disorder (GID)! Thank you very much, you lowlifes who warp events into instigations of MASS DESTRUCTION!!

And they even printed it out today, right after some paparazzi flooded me as I walked out of the pharmacy.

"BEAST BOY!"

"Coming!"

"Give me them RIGHT NOW!"

I quickly ran in and tossed her the box, then ran out the room.

"Dang, it HAD to be on the last day!"

"WHAT?"

"Nothing!"

Then, all of a sudden, Cyborg came in the room, looking at me and laughing his guts out, then looking at the familiar magazine and, well…laughing his guts out.

Then he tried to look at me seriously; he put on his 'Samuel L. Jackson' look. I'm sorry, now I have to say it:

"I've had it with these mother(bleep)ing snakes on this mother(bleep)ing plane!"

HA HA HA HA HA HA!

What was I saying? Oh, yeah.

He put on his serious look. It broke apart instantly, "GENDER INDENTITY DISORDER???!!!??! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA –" and so on.

I just look dismayed, "How did they print those things so fast?"

The android replied, "By making plenty of spelling mistakes."

"Still no excuse."

Right now, as I see it, what I just said…made no sense at all.