Everything You Want
He's everything you want, he's everything you need
He's everything inside of you that you wish you could be
He says all the right things at exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you, and you don't know why
You're waiting for someone to put you together
You're waiting for someone to push you away
There's always another wound to discover
There's always something more you wish he'd say
Hiro sat in Shuichi's bedroom, helping the singer go over some new lyrics and music to go to said lyrics. He lay cross-legged on the floor beside the bed as Shuichi sat at the computer, synchronizing a set of music. The pink-haired boy was babbling on about Yuki, Hiro not really listening but nodding in all the right places. He had tired of hearing of the moody writer awhile ago, but listened anyway for the sake of Shuichi's feelings. He cared very much for the teen...
Cared more than he should have perhaps.
It was true, he was in love with the boy and had only realized it after the j-rocker had fallen head over heels for Yuki. A sorry time to discover these feelings, to be sure, and he couldn't brng himself to crush his best friend's world by confusing him. He valued their friendship far too much to trash it over something that couldn't be helped. So he smiled and listened to Shuichi's gushing, nodding in all the right places, wishing all the time he could be the one to put that smile on his face...
He's everything you want, he's everything you need
He's everything inside of you that you wish you could be
He says all the right things at exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you, and you don't know why
You're waiting for someone to put you together
You're waiting for someone to push you away
There's always another wound to discover
There's always something more you wish he'd say
It was late. They had just finished a concert, and it had been a successful one, in Hiro's opinion. However...
Yuki had not shown up when he had promised he would, so Shuichi was now crying into the auburn haired guitarist's shoulder, which was tense with anger. It angered him and hurt him that Shuichi put himself through so much abuse at the hands of a man who clearly did not love him. Every tear he cried, every broken word that passed his lips was like a dagger to Hiro's heart.
He held Shuichi and whispered reassuring words in his ear, knowing that by tomorrow they will fall on deaf ears as Yuki made amends and Shuichi was once again happy.
He's everything you want, he's everything you need
He's everything inside of you that you wish you could be
He says all the right things at exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you, and you don't know why
Hiro has reached his limit. His patience has dissipated as Shuichi comes to him with yet another bruising heartache, caused by the same person, over and over. This tiring, vicious cycle has hurt him to the point he wants nothing to do with it. He angrily shoves the sobbing singer away, and strides to the door of Shuichi's bedroom.
Shuichi grabs him, hugging him from behind as he begs him not to go. His jagged breaths, his muddled words, his trembling touch stops Hiro's hand on the doorknob, stills the anger in his heart, leaving only tiredness and an ache that hasn't stopped since Yuki came into their lives.
The taller boy turns in Shuichi's arms, and kisses his tears away, no longer able to hide his true emotions. The unadorned shock on Shuichi's face makes him wince, knowing he has done irreparable damage to something he holds near and dear. Hiro hugs Shuichi closer, whispering in his ear, "He's everything you want...but I'm everything you need."
And with that, he gently disentangles himself from Shuichi, turning and leaving, pretending not to hear the thump as Shuichi falls to his knees, willfully not listening to the quiet sobs coming from the other side of the door.
I am everything you want, I am everything you need
I am everything inside of you that you wish you could be
I say all the right things at exactly the right time
But I mean nothing to you, and I don't know why
And I don't know why
Why, why
I don't know
When Shuichi does not come to rehearsal, Hiro is unsurprised but hurt. The knowledge that he has destroyed their friendship cuts at him, mercilessly reminding him that he has hurt someone who never deserved to be hurt. He walks to his house, his guitar in its case over his back. His head is down, his hair fluttering in his face from the gentle breeze, and he doesn't notice the tears until he hears his name. He looks up before he realizes whose voice it is, and he hurriedly and carelessly wipes them away.
Shuichi comes up behind him and asks hesitantly, "Hiro...I-"
"Did you have another fight with your lover?" Hiro spat out, putting a cruelly sarcastic emphasis on the word lover. He knew without looking that Shuichi had recoiled from the venomous tone in his voice, but at the moment he was breaking inside and he didn't know how to stop it. He was unprepared when Shuichi walked around to the front of him and slid his arms around Hiro's neck.
The guitarist stiffened, though a part of him moaned to return the gesture. Quite a big part actually. So hesitantly, cautiously, he wrapped his arms around the shorter boy, savoring the strawberry scented shampoo he knew Shuichi used. He relaxed into the singer, and was stunned when he heard the boy whisper in his ear, "You were wrong, you know. You're everything I want; I just didn't know it until now."
Hiro let the tears fall fast and free and as he pulled back to lay a passionate, ravaging kiss on Shuichi's lips, which, the back of Hiro's mind noted, tasted like pocky, he thought that maybe Shuichi was everything he wanted and everything he needed as well.
I am everything you want, I am everything you need
I am everything inside of you that you wish you could be
I say all the right things at exactly the right time
But I mean nothing to you, and I don't know why
And I don't know why
Why, why
I don't know
-fin-