Notes:
I wanted to write a little vignette about Haru's first and last races as a professional swimmer, and got carried away ^^;
Thanks Tainted as always for the quick beta! And special thanks to Ladygt, who didn't mind all my questions on professional swimming and helped a lot. Thank you!
Chapter 1: For the Future
The first time he wins a tournament, Makoto is there. It's a small local university tournament and the stadium is nearly empty. All Haruka has to do is lift his eyes to the audience. Makoto is standing at the center of the empty stands, arms against a stone barrier, smiling down at him.
Haruka smiles back softly before returning his attention to the commotion around him.
Swimming without his friends is strange for Haruka, even scary. He wonders how his friends would react if he decided pursuing competitive swimming was not for him after all. Rin would be angry. He might even return all the way from Australia to shake some sense into him.
Haruka is not sure he can make it. He feels uncomfortable, like a metal hand is gripping his insides and twisting it. He almost feels paralyzed. He's scared he's going to stop in the middle of the race again, with all the audience and his new, unfamiliar teammates and coaches glaring daggers at him. There's not one friendly face around; they are all just faces distorted with expectations and his body feels as heavy as a log.
Not sure if he started too early or too late, he dives into the water. This water is cold and unwelcoming, lashing against him and undermining his streamline. He feels suffocated. This water will drag him down and carry him away. Makoto will cry.
Suddenly, from the depth of the darkness below his struggling feet, he can see light emerging. An array of butterflies flies all around him, lighting the darkness and guiding his way. He smiles and follows. Not long after, a penguin joins the butterflies, cheerful as it pushes forward, dancing in the water. Haruka feels the water warming up, their hold on his feet loosen. He flip turns and starts his dolphin kick off the wall when he feels the water part forcefully, and he sees the orca swimming at his side, turning on its back and dashing forward, the strength pushes Haruka ahead. Haruka relaxes, his heart no longer gripped with fear, but pounding with excitement. He kicks forward in the water that feels more familiar now.
When he reaches his goal, he gasps for air and lifts his goggles, slowly realizing he made it first. His new coaches surround him. "You started so slow, we thought we lost you," they tell him. "Suddenly at the turn you gained speed- it was almost as if you were possessed." He just nods at them, feeling ashamed of nearly giving up, but inside he feels so overjoyed, he can barely contain it. He was never alone; he will never swim alone again.
His first big tournament is in Osaka. He comes fourth in the freestyle 50m race, but first in the 100m. He is still not completely down from the kick of adrenalin in his blood, when he's dazzled by flashes of cameras. He looks briefly around the audience as he dries himself with the towel. The attendance is full and he can't pin point anyone. He knows his parents are somewhere there. Rei and Nagisa will probably watch the recap on the news later at night. Makoto and his family should also be there somewhere...
Zipping up his jersey, he's trying to find Makoto, but he's ushered quickly towards the podium to receive his medal. And once he's off the podium, a reporter grabs him for an interview. Haruka feels awkward. It's the first time and he's caught unprepared. Usually his coach does the talking for him, but now he's being interviewed separately.
Haruka mumbles short answers and the audience falls into silence as he stumbles on a word. Then all of the sudden-
"Haru-chan! Haru-chan!"
Haruka and the reporters raise their heads when the persistent shouting reaches their ears. At the first level of seats, leaning against the metal bars, stand the Tachibana twins, frantically waving their hands at Haruka, while holding a sign, scribbled in childlike handwriting, it reads- "Good luck Haru-chan!"
Haruka's rigid face relaxes into a soft smile and he raises his hand shyly in acknowledgement. He can see Makoto running down the steps to get to his young siblings, and Haruka easily spots the Tachibanas and his own parents sitting a few rows higher in the same area.
"Who are these young fans?" the reporter asks, turning back to Haruka.
"Family," he responds at once without second thought.
The reporter turns to one of his assistants, asking him to fetch the children. Haruka answers another question until the assistant returns with the twins. The two dash at Haruka, hugging his waist. He rubs their heads fondly and raises his eyes to where Makoto stands. Makoto holds his palms together in apology, but Haruka just smiles.
Ran acts like a star, answering the reporter's questions without getting confused. She enjoys being in front of the cameras.
Ren is more shy. He clings to Haruka and clutches the edge of his jersey. He only nods or shakes his head at the questions, letting his sister do the talking. Haruka is relieved the twins grab the attention of the interview and no longer feels nervous or awkward. When the reporters thank the three of them, Haruka takes the children's hands and takes them with him inside the venue.
If anyone wants to know Haruka's records, Rin is probably the person to ask. Even from Australia he keeps track of Haruka's development. Sometimes they exchange text messages, but Makoto is better at keeping in touch and with time, Haruka relies on Makoto to keep him updated about Rin. It's different than the last time Rin left. Now they are closer friends with a similar goal. Haruka learns of a swimming expedition to Australia after Makoto hears about it from Rin and decides to apply. He qualifies with not much obstacles and it becomes his first international tournament.
There's something satisfying, like closing a circle, with his first international competition taking place at the same pool where he discovered his dream. He feels lighter now, no shadows binding him, and he manages to break a personal record and is close to guarantee himself a spot on the 2016 Japanese Olympic team. Haruka comes third, behind an Australian and an American and earns his first world medal. He returns to Japan with a higher profile than he left with. The word "prodigy" thrown around him, and he's starting to feel the pressure when his coach ushers him to a makeshift news conference at the airport.
Finally free and ordered to go home and rest, Haruka can't wait to get away from all the hassle and commotion and dashes out to a train. Still with his suitcase and dressed in his track suit, he gets off the train one station before his stop.
"I'm home," he smiles softly when Makoto opens the door. Makoto looks confused for a moment, but then his face lights up in a smile, just as Haruka pictured. "Welcome home, Haru," he says and helps Haruka with the luggage. "You did well. Congratulations," he adds. "I saw on TV."
Haruka blushes and then grabs the suitcase from Makoto's hands. He unzips the top pocket and takes out the medal he stuffed in there quickly after the interview and hands it to Makoto, who looks at it in awe. "That's amazing, Haru!" He runs his fingers on the embossed decoration. "It's surprisingly heavy."
"Keep it," Haruka says when Makoto returns the medal.
"Eh?" Makoto blinks at him and Haruka takes the medal and motioned at him to lean forward. He slips the medal over Makoto's neck and touches it, pressing it against his chest.
"It's for you," he says with a light smile.
"But it's Haru's-" Makoto is silenced with a kiss and they end up making love with nothing but the bronze medal between them.
It becomes a sort of a ritual whenever Haruka returns home from a tournament; perhaps a secret goal- to mark his boyfriend with as many medals from as many pools around the world he swims at. By the summer of 2016 the display space Makoto created for Haruka's medals considerably expands and Haruka's place on the Olympic team of Japan is secured and finalized.
Even with nearly two years of experience in international competitions and championships, the Olympics are like nothing Haruka had been to before. It's a bustling carnival, a media circus, and he can't feel more out of place if he tries. But when he dives into the water, he's released of every earthly thought. It's just the feel of the water, and the amazing presence of the swimmers lining up with him inside the water. The blood boils in his veins and he cuts through the water, pushing forward with everything he has. Everything he is, everything he was, everything he worked for - all concentrates at the tip of his fingers, in his stroke.
His achievements are astounding. He makes it all the way to the finals in his first event - 200m freestyle. His forte, the 100m race, brings Japan a silver medal, ending decades long drought for the once swimming empire nation, and he's only a hundredth of a second shy of the bronze in the 50m.
When he returns to Japan he's no longer an anonymous face only swimming enthusiasts know, but a national hero. The local media nicknames him the dolphin prince. There's a welcoming committee at the airport, but Haruka is more taken aback by all the regular people that have come to welcome him back to Japan, waving flags at him or just their hands, trying to reach out to him and congratulate him for a job well done. Flashes of cameras blind him, and most people use their phones to snap his pictures. He follows his teammates and waves at the crowd awkwardly, shakes hands of the people standing closer to him. Some girls are crying, some people try to get his signature or pose for a selfie with him. Haruka isn't even sure what is going on with all the commotion, he just wants to go home and soak in a cold water bath.
The flight back to Japan was long, but the time he spends at the press conference feels even longer. He can no longer tell night from day and his body starts to feel heavy, he thinks he might collapse when he hurries to get up from his seat at the end.
He stumbles out of the room, following blindly someone with a Japan jersey - he assumes it's his coach - who continues talking to him even though Haruka can't make up half of what he's saying. He just wants to get into the cab and go home.
"Haru!" Someone slams a hand on his back, stopping him. He turns around to see Rin and a wave of guilt washes over him. Rin didn't qualify for the Olympics and hasn't contacted Haruka before, although he sent a line message to Makoto to pass on. Haruka doesn't know what to say so he just keeps his mouth closed. Rin's hand moves from Haruka's back to the silver medal he's still wearing around his neck. His fingers trace the embossing on the precious metal and then he clutches it.
"It's heavier than regular silver medals, huh?" he asks as he feels it up with his palm.
"Hn..." Haruka is still not sure what to do. He half expects Rin to burst into tears and yell at him, push him against the wall and cry into his chest. It was originally Rin's dream, after all, what right does Haruka have to take it from him?
Rin doesn't do any of that. He just lets go of the medal, letting Haruka feel its weight again against his chest.
He grins, baring his shark like teeth, almost menacing. "Good job. Congratulations, Haru," he says calmly and Haruka blinks in surprise.
"I'll admit it all right, it's 1:0 to you, but next time you better watch your tail or I'll bite it off," he warns.
"I'd like to see you try." Haruka shrugs him off with a light smile. He can't believe how relieved he feels that Rin isn't angry or hurt for losing to him the Olympic race. It's a load off his chest that he hasn't even realized he carried.
"Now you better hurry up and show it to Makoto." Still grinning, Rin points his thumb behind him and Haru raises his eyes, surprised to see Makoto stepping in behind Rin.
"Congratulations, Haru!" Makoto beams at him, tilting his head. "Welcome back."
Haruka nods. "I'm home," he replies softly and blushes as he thinks of replacing the visitor tag Makoto wears around his neck with the Olympic medal.
The weeks following the Olympics are surreal. There seems to be no trace left of Haruka's old life. He's recognized by everyone wherever he goes, his face is looking back at him from every newsstand and he's often invited for interviews and talk shows and featured on sports news. He understands it's the price he must pay to be able to fulfill his dream, but he misses the days he felt free. He turns down most interviews and focuses his all on his training.
As Haruka becomes busy with his new life, Makoto becomes busy with his studies. For a while they barely have time to do more than text each other. They try to make time in the weekends to see each other, but Haruka's schedule is quick to fill with training camps and overseas expeditions, while Makoto heads towards his exams.
When he returns to Japan a day early than expected, Haruka decides to make a surprise visit to Makoto's apartment. There's no answer and Haruka uses the spare key Makoto gave him to put his luggage inside. He has a good guess where to go. Makoto often frequents the corner cafe to study.
The cafe seems full and Haruka looks around the tables, when he suddenly sees the smiling face he was longing to see. But Makoto's smile isn't directed at him. He's sitting at a table of six and smiling as he goes over the textbook with another guy. With a start, Haruka realizes he doesn't know any of Makoto's friends. He's an outsider, looking at Makoto in a social circle he's not a part of, like witnessing a side of Makoto that he doesn't know. It's a strange, unpleasant feeling and he starts to walk away.
"Haru?" He stops and turns around when he hears Makoto calling him. Makoto leaves the table and rushes over to Haruka. "I thought you were returning tomorrow!" He smiles, and Haruka's stomach flutters. It's the smile Makoto reserves only for him.
He just nods, feeling too self-conscious. Makoto's friends and some people from other tables stare at them. They probably recognize Haruka in some way. He wonders if Makoto wasn't going to introduce him.
"Ah, let me introduce you to my friends," Makoto says cheerfully.
As he thought, Makoto's friends know him. They're not swimming enthusiasts but they heard about him, especially from Makoto. The two girls in the group giggle and jokingly wonder if he has a girlfriend. One of the guys blows out smoke from his cigarette and replies in Haruka's stead that swimming is his girlfriend. He quips some joke Haruka heard a lot before about swimmers shaving all their body hairs and wants to know if it's true swimmers aren't allowed to have sex before tournaments. Makoto groans at the intrusive questions and Haruka decides he doesn't like Makoto's new friends very much.
"They're not that bad," Makoto apologizes once they finally leave the cafe and head back to Makoto's place. "They were just nervous to finally meet you, Haru." He chuckles.
"You smell of smoke," Haruka mutters in response and side-glances up at him.
Makoto giggles again. "Then I guess I should shower..." he opens the door to his room. "Want to join?"
He does.
They spend the rest of the evening in bed, and Makoto only gets up once to order a late night pizza.
"I'm sorry; you were studying for an exam..." Haruka apologizes once they sit to eat, propped against the bed. The textbooks serve as a pizza stand on the table.
Makoto shakes his head. "I still have a few days left. Tomorrow..." He puts one greasy finger in his mouth as he ponders. "Hmm, I was planning to go to the airport to see you so I don't really have any plans."
Haruka is glad he managed to get on the early flight. It meant they have a whole day to spend together. He couldn't even remember when the last was. His eyes drop on the display Makoto made for the medals and awards. There's no room left even in the glass cabinet.
"Haru, you're really amazing," Makoto says as though reading Haruka's mind. "I'm gonna need to find a bigger apartment." He giggles at his own joke.
Haruka takes a last bite from the pizza and puts the half eaten crust back in the tray. When he leans back, shoulder brushing against Makoto's arm, he quietly lets out, "Let's move in together."
"Eh?" The pizza drops from Makoto's hand. He blinks at Haruka. "Are you serious?"
Haruka nods. He's never been more sure of anything in his life as he's sure he wants to see Makoto's face every night when he returns home.
Makoto looks hesitant and Haruka turns to him, casually resting his hand on Makoto's hip. "If you don't want to, if it's in the way of your studies, then never m-"
"No!" Makoto cuts him off. "I want to!" he insists. "I want to live with Haru..." He smiles. "I'm just really happy."
Haruka smiles, relieved. "Me too." He pushes himself against Makoto's large body, wrapping his arms around his neck. "Tomorrow let's look at apartments."
When they sit at the real estate office they realize how different they are. When the realtor asks what apartment they are looking for, Makoto says two bedrooms.
"One bedroom is fine isn't it?" Haruka asks and Makoto smiles nervously.
"One bedroom, and a living dining kitchen room..." Makoto reluctantly agrees.
Haruka wants a Japanese style room; Makoto wants western style with flooring. Haruka wants an old bathroom, Makoto insists on a modern one.
"A modern bath is more spacious, no?" Makoto looks at Haruka.
The athlete blushes lightly. "But you can feel the water more in the old tub," he mumbles.
The realtor looks at one, then the other and wonders why they want to share an apartment at all.
Eventually they pick a two bedroom apartment with a living dining kitchen room. One room is a Japanese style tatami room and the rest are all western style with flooring. The bathroom is modern, but the tub is shorter and deeper, resembling an older Japanese bath. Haruka spends exactly one night on the futon in the Japanese bedroom, before he relocates permanently to Makoto's room and the Japanese room becomes the study room.
One week after they move in together, Haruka wonders why they hadn't done that from the start. Even if Makoto is gone for his part time job, even if Haruka is away all day for training, being able to see Makoto's face in person just once a day, being able to touch him, calms his heart in ways he cannot describe. Like magic.
One month after they move in together, it feels so natural as though they had never lived apart.
When they graduate, Makoto passes qualifications to become a swimming teacher, but finding a full time job isn't easy. When he finally lands a full time job as an assistant coach at a middle school, he's sent for a level 3 course and qualifies as a coach. Although not his original intention, he ends up on the supporting side of competitive swimming.
Haruka comes to watch Makoto's first race. As a local middle school tournament it doesn't grab much attention and the audience is quite empty except for small groups of parents who came to root for their children. He sits away from them, all alone, wearing a baseball cap. It's strange for him to watch a competition from the sidelines and remember the short days he was part of that scene. It feels strange to see the pool glittering from above and not being able to feel the water. But soon he's completely enthralled - not by the pool, not by the competitive young children, but by a side of Makoto he's never seen before.
Makoto is an assistant coach, but in charge of the first year boys and girls teams. Makoto, who's usually clumsy and a little insecure - sometimes even a pushover, appears to be in complete control of the game. Haruka regrets sitting so far up. He wants to have a better look at this transformation. It's as though Makoto pressed on a switch. Haruka had only seen him switching like that when he's gaming.
The parents turn to Haruka in surprise when he joins them at the lower rows. He looks too young to be a parent; they assume he's an older brother and ask who he's come to root for.
"The coach," he mumbles, tilting his head at Makoto's direction.
"Oh the new assistant, Tachibana-kun?" The mothers seem to be taken with Makoto. They continue asking Haruka questions and he answers shortly but politely. He's careful not to answer anything too personal.
"You look familiar," one of them suddenly tells him and he shifts in his seat. He knows at least a few of them already recognized him. They don't bother him and when the relay starts they all focus on cheering for the children. One of the mothers gives him a flag and he awkwardly joins their cheering.
Makoto finishes loading the children on the bus when Haruka appears before him.
"Haru, you came!" He smiles in surprise.
Haruka smiles back and congratulates him. There's not a lot they can exchange with 20 pairs of eyes looking at them from the bus' windows, but Makoto invites Haruka to see them in practice.
One day Haruka has free, he decides to drop by Makoto's work, bringing him a lunch box. He's surprised by how big and advanced are the pool facilities of the school. Coming from a small fishing town in the countryside, it never occurred to him there were powerhouses recruiting promising athletes already at middle school age.
When he finds Makoto with his team, he's taken aback again by the "Coach Tachibana" persona. Makoto sounds assertive but not domineering, he is confident in his words while able to build confidence in his young students. It sounds like he knows exactly what each and every one of them needs and what they are capable of. He sounds like a coach, but at the same time he sounds like Makoto. A weird feeling pass through Haruka as he watches him reach out his hand and help one boy out of the pool. Makoto does his job with a smile and the children seem to love him. It looks like Makoto has truly found his calling. It makes Haruka happy but at the same time he misses the days only he knew the strength of Makoto's hand, the brightness of his smile and the endless capacity of his kindness.
Haruka hits a wall with his own career shortly after. He performs badly at a tournament and that one failure to place continues to haunt him in training and in the next competitions. He is checked for injuries, but the doctors can't find anything physically wrong. Haruka feels frustrated. Something doesn't feel right. The water doesn't feel right. He can't look at another pool without feeling as though he's about to drown.
"It feels like the water is resisting me," he tries to explain to Makoto. "It doesn't feel right." To anyone else, he would sound crazy, but Makoto just looks at him with a soft smile and takes his hand. They go on an unexpected holiday to a tropical island and spend a magical week with breath taking sunsets, white sandy shores, crystal clear water and pods of wild dolphins. They go to the sea early in the morning, completely alone on the private beach. The ocean is as calm as a pool and Haruka feels rejuvenated as the healing power of the water surrounds him and frees him of any concern just as it used to. When he swims, curious dolphins join him, close enough to make it seem he is one of them. He resurfaces to breathe and they do the same. He swims back to the shore and they follow him again.
Makoto sits on the sand, just watching as Haruka emerges from the sea and walks over to him. He plops down and rests his head against Makoto's shoulder and they watch the dolphins in silence.
"It looks like they're waiting for you," Makoto says with a chuckle after a while. "They're not leaving."
Haruka smiles. "You want to come swim as well?" he asks when he gets up.
"Ehh..." Makoto makes a face.
"You're scared of the dolphins?" Haruka asks quietly.
"Uh, well..." Another nervous chuckle.
"Makoto..." Haruka reaches out his hand.
"Haru..." Emerald eyes sparkle and he takes Haruka's hand and gets up.
Once taking off in the water, the dolphins join him again. They're fast and catch up to him in seconds under the water. He continues his crawl, the water splash against his face as
He can feel their presence like a massive pressure at his sides, but it does not intimidate or slow him down. On the contrary, he's never felt more excited, not even swimming against the top of the swimming world. Then there's another powerful presence inching steadily behind them. Makoto's presence in the water makes Haruka nostalgic. Ever since graduating high school and taking different paths they haven't swam together again. Even so, Makoto's presence in the water is as strong as he remembers, perhaps stronger. He advances quickly behind Haruka. Suddenly he stops swimming. Haruka stops as well and turns around. The dolphins jump past him, there are two of them now. Haruka swims towards Makoto and floats by his side. The ripples made by the dolphins hit them gently. Makoto has a distant expression as he watches them swim away.
"Makoto?"
"I'm fine," Makoto replies to Haruka's unasked question. "They're beautiful... I've never seen them so up close before, without any glass between us."
Haruka smiles. He remembers their elementary school field trip to the aquarium. Makoto was completely mesmerized by the playful marine mammals, even as he was clutching Haruka's shirt while watching them.
He realizes Makoto's eyes are no longer on the dolphins and blushes lightly, wondering if Makoto can feel the heat wave that crossed his body.
"Haru, you looked just like the dolphins when you were swimming with them," Makoto tells him with a giggle. A drop of seawater makes a path on his cheek. "They were swimming, lined up with you so far ahead... It almost felt like watching you race." He chuckles. "For a moment I could swear the vast ocean is a little pool with lanes."
Haruka blinks. He hasn't noticed any of that. He just swam, trying to feel as much of the water as he could, feel the water that finally accepted him and surrounded him naturally. Water that also had Makoto in it.
Makoto sees Haruka's puzzled expression and laughs. "I think you even broke your personal record. It's too bad I couldn't measure it."
Haruka's heart pounds loudly in his ears. "Makoto, I want you to train me," he says as he puts a hand on Makoto's shoulder.
"Huh?!" Makoto gawks at him, a little wave crushes against his face and he coughs the salty water. "What are you saying, Haru?"
"I want you to become my coach," he reiterates.
Makoto shakes the water from his hair and they swim back to the shore. The sun is higher now and the sand is warm, but they are still the only ones around. Haruka sits down next to Makoto, their shoulders almost touching. He continues,
"When I saw you at the school, coaching those children... I wanted you to look only at me. I thought it was childish of me, being jealous of middle school students. But it's not that." He raises his blue eyes to Makoto. "I admired you as a coach."
"Haru... I'm honored, but I don't think I'm qualified..." Makoto admits quietly, rubbing the back of his head. "I only coach kids; you're a top level medalist, Haru."
Haruka shakes his head. This is not about prestige or certificates. And Makoto has shown more dedication and vision than anyone. The nights he spends on developing individual training programs for each of his students is all the evidence Haruka needs. He leans and rests both hands on Makoto's shoulders.
"You understand me better than anyone," he insists. "You got me to swim again when I thought it was over. I want you there for me when I make it to the finish line." His eyes shimmer as he stares intensely at his partner. "I want to swim with you, Makoto."
"Haru..." Makoto's green eyes filled with tears. He tells Haruka he will think about it, but Haruka can tell Makoto is reluctant and he's dead set on making it happen.
They return home and Haruka finds out all he needed was a little vacation. The water welcome him back and the coaches are all impressed with the miraculous recovery of his form. But Haruka feels the difference.
When he visits Makoto at work, Haruka is even more determined to hire Makoto as his personal coach. The children have progressed by leaps and bounds since the last time he's seen them. The first year girls relay team advances to the nationals, as well as four students in individual races. It's by no means an easy feat in the most competitive prefecture in the country, even at middle school level. With an impressive resume under such a short time as an assistant, Haruka feels Makoto is ready to become his coach.
The only challenge left is convincing Makoto that he's ready to take on the role.
"It's Nanase-senshuu!" The children suddenly surround him. It's not only Makoto's first year students, but also the older ones. The head coach and two other assistants are also surprised to see a world class champion at their middle school pool facilities. What's more, it's Haruka Nanase, who's known to shy away from the spotlight and outside tournaments his public appearances are few.
Haruka is embarrassed by the sudden attention and wishes he had waited until Makoto finished the session. His partner just smile softly and does the talking for Haruka, just like old times, introducing him as a childhood friend who stopped by to visit. The coaches are as thrilled as the kids, wondering why Makoto never invited his famous childhood friend before.
"Nanase-senshuu, swim with us!" the children ask him once he stops bowing politely at Makoto's co-workers.
"I only swim free," he says almost automatically.
The kids laugh. "We know!"
The coaches then formally invite Haruka to join the training session and he accepts. It's not surprising the training drills are far more intense and advanced than what they had at the same age in Iwatobi middle school. However, he's surprised it's even more advanced than the training at Samezuka Academy, which prides itself in its powerhouse swimming club. As expected from a swimming club in Tokyo, the children are all aiming not to become the best in Japan, but the world.
In the pool with children 10 years his junior, Haruka gets to swim under Makoto's guidance for the first time. Makoto's style is completely different than Haruka's coaches at his club. He's gentle, but pushes forward, teaching to extract the best without overworking or exhausting his students. He puts emphasis on warm up to avoid injuries.
Haruka is determined to slow himself down when he lines up with four young boys at the springboards. He doesn't want to crash any of their dreams as swimmers. The distant memory of Rin's crying face surfaces before his eyes.
"I'm quitting swimming." He doesn't want to hear anyone say those words again because of him. It's a scar deep in his heart that never truly healed.
He's still thinking about those words when they step up on the springboard. As he's fixing his cap and reaching for his goggles, the boy next to him calls his name.
"Don't dare to go easy on us!" He grins and puts on his goggles. "We won't forgive you if you do!"
Haruka blinks in surprise, then smile and nods.
At the sign, he dives into the water. His body feels light as it's being carried off by the water. The 25 meter pool feels too short as he turns and quickly reaches the end, touching the wall of the pool.
The onlookers cheer, and Haruka turns to watch behind him the children advance.
"Haru." He's surprised to look up and see Makoto's spread hand. He quickly grabs it strongly and Makoto pulls him out of the pool. His heart pounds loudly as he looks at their linked hands, but Makoto quickly lets go, his attention back on the pool and the children.
Haruka turns around as well to see the competition between the boys. None of them slows down or gives up and they reach the goal, a few seconds after Haruka.
Before he can congratulate on a good race, they are all excited about Haruka's swimming, surrounding him again. They want to know his secret and how he swims so fast without even being short of breath and Haruka is happy to share his advice:
"Don't resist the water. Accept its presence."
The children are puzzled and Makoto chuckles and ushers them to prepare for the next swim. Some of them cling to Makoto. The boy that challenged Haruka asks Makoto if he watched him, to which Makoto answers with a bright smile. It strikes Haruka that perhaps the person those children admire is not the world class swimmer Nanase, but their coach Tachibana. Haruka watches them walk and clutches his hand, still feeling the lingering sensation of Makoto's strong hand.
After Makoto finishes his work, Haruka joins him and they go to a quiet little restaurant, where Haruka asks Makoto again to become his coach. Makoto looks at him with a soft smile and Haruka knows Makoto is going to turn him down.
"Haru, I'm really honored..." Makoto starts. "I also want to swim with you again, Haru..."
"Then why won't you?" Haruka uncharacteristically raises his voice. "I think you're qualified enough, I know it."
"Thank you, Haru." Makoto smiles again, but his smiling face only annoys Haruka. He doesn't understand why Makoto doesn't jump on the opportunity, not just as a coach - he knows Makoto cares about fame as much as he does, which is not at all, but any coach would dream of training an Olympic swimmer - but as his lifelong partner, it's a chance for them to spend more time together and share an aspect of their life which they haven't in some years. Thinking about it, walking this path without Makoto has no meaning at all. He started competitive swimming only because of Makoto who threw those very words at him.
"It's not that I don't want to," Makoto answers Haruka's internal monologue. "I just can't right now."
Haruka frowns. "Because of those kids."
His partner nods. "You saw them. How hard they work... This school is a powerhouse, that's true. They're in Tokyo best 8 every year, but did you know they haven't made it to the nationals in 22 years?" Makoto raises his eyes to Haruka. "When I joined no one even looked at the first year students... I can't leave them now when they've made it this far."
Haruka sighed. Taking a sip from his barley tea, he considers giving up. But with only two years to go before the next Olympic games, right there in Tokyo, he has an idea for a compromise.
"Then don't quit your job," he says, putting down his cup.
"Eh?"
"You can train them until the nationals. You can even train them until the end of the year, but in your free time, train me."
"Haru..." Makoto mumbles.
"It shouldn't be a problem, right?" Haruka's deep blue eyes look dark as a stormy sea. If Makoto really doesn't want to do it, this is where Haruka plans to give up.
"Un, I'll do it." Makoto's face look serious and determined and Haruka gets confused.
"What?"
"I'll do it," Makoto repeats. "I'll become Haru's coach."
Haruka's stomach flutters in response. "You will?" he asks, still sounding doubtful. He didn't expect Makoto to agree to his compromise so quickly without some time to think it over first.
Makoto nods. "Those kids are important to me," he says. "But after seeing how strongly you feel about it, Haru... It made me happy." He smiles. "I won't go easy on you though."
"Yeah." Haruka finally smiles and the light returns to his eyes. "I'll be prepared."
end of part I