Author's Note: I fucked up and came up with another AU. Oops.

Alternative Summary: NozoNicoRin fucks up and Maki is forever in bondage situation. Also NozoNico cracks lots of shitty sex jokes and lame one-liners.

NozoEli are hella lame honeymoon type couple.

Sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride...?


The Heist

"We're burglars! Not kidnappers!" Nico whispers harshly towards her taller bustier friend. Nozomi only shrugged, her arms crossed as her plump lips twitched slightly as she tried to keep her expression neutral to the whole ordeal—green eyes twinkling in slight amusement.

"Well...this scene does say otherwise..." Nozomi simply stated glancing over to the unconscious red-head girl that was currently tied to the chair. "I honestly don't appreciate you tying people to chairs in my basement though, Nicocchi..."

"I didn't have a choice! She saw my face!" The short girl waved her hands in front of her face in exasperation before pointing an accusing finger towards Nozomi. "And you weren't exactly very helpful with the directions!"

"Elicchi was in the room! I had to somehow distract her so she didn't realize what we were doing! I did it for the succession of the heist!"

"Swapping spit does not help with the heist whatsoever!" Nico slapped both hands onto her face and slid it down with an exhausted expression.

This woman needs to control her thirst.

"We are so fucked…"

How did this happen? A simple heist turned kidnapping and Nico regretted ever having anything to do with this. Although she must admit...it was partially her fault to begin with since she was the one who proposed this idea.

It all started on a simple morning.

Nico woke up, made breakfast, and was preparing her day of working her ass off with her multiple part-time jobs. It was then that the morning turned sour as she received news that she was to be evicted from her apartment building due to the fact that it was going to be demolished because of safety hazards or something.

It was ridiculous! She lived in the old apartment building ever since she moved away from her family to start over again from her life of crimes.

Yes, this cute adorable angelic face is actually a devil in disguise.

In the underworld she was known as the Ruby-Eyed Devil; A master thief.

Like Lupin the Third—except cuter and more charismatic, if she do say so herself.

It didn't matter how tight security was or how heavily locked up something was. If Nico had her ruby red eyes on it, it was as good as hers. Of course with the help of her friend Nozomi who would work the equipment; giving Nico's directions and guidance in and out of the buildings. Then there was Rin who was almost as skilled…maybe even more skilled than Nico—as if Nico would ever admit it though. Altogether they made a great team it didn't last long as Nozomi met her girlfriend and retired from the thieving world. Soon enough Rin enrolled in a college to get a better life that didn't have to do with crimes. And finally Nico was left just working any various part-time jobs she could get her hands on. It wasn't much, but Nico admit that it was better to stray away from a life of crimes.

But now…

She was evicted from her house, her boss have just fired her, and all her savings was empty. She was in a rut…what else could she do?

How can she get out of this situation?


"I can't believe this is happening..." Nico growled, while she was seated on a reclining chair—she took a spoonful of ice-cream and shoveled it into her mouth, holding the bucket close to her."Thanks for taking me in, Nozomi..."

Nozomi only smiled while sitting on the couch. Her girlfriend, Eli, had her head lying on Nozomi's lap and sleeping soundly. Nozomi hummed as she ran her fingers though the blonde locks of her girlfriend, glancing up at Nico. "Nicocchi, you know you're always welcome here with open arms."

"Yeah yeah. Open arms for me. Open legs for Eli." Nico snorted. "I don't wanna mooch off you love birds forever. I need some cash...and being unable to hold down a job isn't helping at all..." Another spoonful of ice-cream and Nico winced as her brain began throbbing from the brain freeze. Nozomi watched in amusement as her friend clenched and unclenched her fists trying to subdue the pain.

"Why not just enroll into some college classes and get a degree then, Nicocchi? You can probably actually find a better job with a degree in your hands."

"That would require me having money in my hands which, surprise! I do not have." Nico grimaced as she grabbed the controller and flipped through the channels.

The TV flashed and a news-reporter was on the screen speaking into a microphone next to a rich suave-looking business man with red-hair. "And here we have Nishikino-san to speak about the new clinic he has just opened up. Do you have any words, Nishikino-san?"

Nico growled, gripping the controller tightly in her hands. "Ugh…these rich assholes. Must be nice to throw money around like that."

"You mean like how you did back in the days?"

Red eyes flickered over to green for a moment before turning back to the screen and Nico snorted. "At least I didn't always waste all my shares on meat."

Nozomi only grinned at that as she ran her fingers down Eli's neck before massaging her shoulder, eliciting a soft purr from the sleeping girl. "Well, there's only one type of meat I really prefer to eat now." She said waggling her eyebrows.

Nico gagged, "Oh god, please stop before I vomit up my ice-cream."

"Technically that's my ice-cream."

She stuck her tongue out at Nozomi before shoveling another spoonful of ice-cream into her mouth and went back to watching the news. The news-reporter yammering about the clinic that Nico could honestly care less. She just continued to stare at the business man—her mind contemplating.

Suddenly a plan hit her.

It was a bad plan though...

"Nozomi…"

The girl hummed in response to Nico, her fingers still playing with the sleeping girl's hair—occasionally rubbing her shoulder and back.

"How about we call up Rin and catch up?"

Nozomi paused and frowned before gently ushering Eli awake. "Elicchi. Darling." She cooed and the sleeping beauty stirred from her slumber.

"Mmn…hey, Honey…" Eli mumbled groggily before hoisting herself up from her seat and giving Nozomi a peck on the lips.

A loud gagging choking noise from the reclining chair and Eli's eyes opened wide in surprise—her head whipping towards Nico's direction. "N-Nico! W-when did you- how long were you-?!"

"I've been here the whole entire time, 'darling'." Nico gagged as she took the last bite of the ice-cream. The blonde turned bright red and she covered her face in embarrassment. Nozomi pat her back with an amused grin, "Eli, why don't you head upstairs? It's late and you have work early in the morning."

"Yeah, Nozomom can tuck you in and if you're hella thirsty, you can suckle off her boo-" A book was thrown and hit Nico right in the face.

"Oh. Sorry, Nicocchi. I was aiming at the bookshelf."

"The bookshelf is nowhere near my face!"

Eli laughed embarrassingly and got up from the couch, stretching lightly with a small yawn. "I guess I'll head upstairs." She glanced back over Nozomi, her face slightly flushed. "You'll come up to sleep soon, right?"

"Oh god…you guys are as horny as people on 4chan."

Nozomi picked up another book and Nico shrank back, shielding herself with her arms. "I mean, you two are such lovely perfect couples that even a pair of cinnamon rolls couldn't compare! Pair of cinnamon. Compare. Eh? Eh?"

The lame line earned her a laughter from her friend. "I'll head up with you in a bit, Elicchi. I just want to make sure Nicocchi doesn't try and kick down the door and yell 'Player 3 has entered the game!' again."

"One time that happened! One time! I really thought you guys were playing Brawl or something!"

Eli only shook her head, laughing with a small blush on her face from the memory before making her way up the stairs. "Okay then, I'm turning in for the night then."

As soon as she was out of sight, the playful atmosphere turned tense and Nozomi stared at Nico with a more serious expression. "I told you never to mention about anything like that with Eli around, Nico…"

"She was asleep, so I thought it would be okay…sorry." Nico mumbled the apology softly. Nozomi sighed before leaning her head back, "Calling Rin-chan over…you don't really want to just catch up, do you?"

"Okay, you got me…" Nico sighed. "Look…it's just that…if I had any other choice I wouldn't even think about this."

"Do you really want to go back to that life again, Nico?" Nozomi turned off the television. "Do you really want to drag Rin into that life again too?"

Red eyes met with green and Nico swallowed the lump in her throat. "I can't go back to my family. You know that, Nozomi." Eyes fall downcasted to her fist clenched tightly on her lap. "This heist…you don't have to join. And I won't drag Rin into this either then. I'll do it by myself." She stood up, walking out of the living room.

Nozomi watched her sadly and bit her bottom lip.

"Wait." Nico paused and Nozomi took a deep breath and sighed, "Alright then. I know I'm going to regret this. But there's no way you can do this alone so I guess I'm out of retirement."

A blur tackled Nozomi on the couch and Nico was smothering her face in her ample bosom. "Oh god, I love you so much! No homo though. Even if you are as gay as a rainbow."

"And you're as flat as a chopping board." The busty girl chuckled petting the smaller girl on the head who only growled in reply. "We're partners, Nicocchi. Well…Eli is my partner for life. But you're my partner in crime for life, I suppose…"

"Nozomi…" Nico looked up at Nozomi with teary eyes. "I promise…this will be our official last heist."

The doorbell rang and Nico jumped off of Nozomi, heading towards the front door. Nozomi raised an eyebrow wondering who could that be coming by so late at night. "Well that was quick. That should be Rin."

"…What?"

Nico shivered from the glaring daggers at her back and she laughed nervously. "I may or may not have texted Rin earlier…while you were eye-humping Eli."

"You're terrible!" Nozomi whined slapping Nico on the shoulder as she followed her to the front door. "You just don't understand, Nicocchi. When you meet that person you love...someday, you just can't take your eyes off them."

"I guess you're right since the only thing you can take off of Eli is usually her clothes." Nico said with a smirk and Nozomi only laughed. "And for your information I do have someone I love. Three people to be exact!"

Nozomi's hand paused on the door's handle and she looked at Nico with an amused grin. "Aww. Are you going to say something sappy; like you love Elicchi, Rin, and me?"

Nico reeled back with a fake disgusted look—and hand on her chest in mocked agony. "Ew, no. Don't be gay. I was talking about Me, Myself, and I."

"Wow, okay then."

They opened the door and there stood Rin with an armful of cup noodles. "Hey, guys. I was already out at the convenience store near the area when I got your message, Nico! So I bought some extra cup noodles! I'm ready to watch Netflix and chill!"

Nozomi looked over at Nico, who only laughed dryly at this.

"Come on, Rin." Nico gestured Rin to come in and explained to her the situation.

"We're not gonna watch Netflix and chill. First of all; besides myself—NEVER respond to anyone who wants to watch Netflix and chill. Second of all; I called you over because we're going to plan a heist."

"Nyah?! Wait! We're not gonna watch Netflix and chill?! You're really gonna doing that?! A heist?!" Rin shouted, her eyes sparkling in excitement—Nozomi and Nico quickly covered her mouth to silence her. They were currently in the basement of the house, but Rin could probably wake anyone within a mile radius with her loud voice.

"Remember what I taught you before. Like a ninja…shhh." Nico said pressing a finger to her lips and shushing the cat-like girl. Rin's mouth formed an "o" shape and she nodded, copying Nico's gesture and shushing.

"You don't have to join though, Rin-chan…" Nozomi said softly. "You've left that life behind and Nico shouldn't be dragging you into it again."

Nico looked away with an expression of guilt, her eyebrows furrowing down. "I guess Nozomi is right…you're on your way of becoming a college graduate, getting yourself a stable job, a better life…I shouldn't have really called you over."

Rin blinked before scratching the back of her head, sighing a little and sitting crossed legged on the dusty old couch. "Well…actually…I might get dropped, nyah…"

The two older girls paused and looked at Rin with an incredulous expression.

"WHAT?!"

"Shhhh! Like a ninja!" Rin shushed them.

Nozomi and Nico covered their mouth and looked at each other before back at Rin.

"What do you mean 'Get dropped'?!" Nico whispered harshly pulling on the other girl's collar and Rin chuckled nervously. "Tuition isn't cheap…and well…I don't really have any money to pay for it and you guys already know I can't exactly go ask my dad for any money, nyah…"

"Yeah, because if you go back to that drunkard…I'll hang you by your toes and make you eat fish eyes."

Rin paled and grimaced at the thought of that. "Ewww! No, nyahhh!"

"I did not know you were into that sort of kinky stuff, Nicocchi."

"Do not talk to me about kinky stuff, Nozomi. I've seen what was in that box hidden in the closet." Nico deadpanned. Nozomi did a fake surprised gasp and Rin looked at Nico with a confused curious expression. "What was in the box?"

Both girls looked at each other quickly with a shocked expression. "Nothing!" They both answered quickly and Rin only tilted her head.

"Anyways, time to get serious." Nico coughed, pulling out the laptop and booted it up. She started the browser and quickly typed in the target.

"Nishikino Mako. The head honcho of the Nishikino clinics." Profiles of the man appeared on the screen. "One of the richest man in Japan by far and our target." Another tab popped up and this time a very large rich looking mansion appeared. "Here's his lovely little mansion. We're gonna take whatever valuable he has. Jewels, account information, whatever."

Nico slammed her palms on the table, staring at the two other girls. "So we're going to need blueprints of the outside and the insides. All information of any help that goes in and out. Security, alarms, yadda yadda. All that junk."

Nozomi nodded her head while heading towards one of the dusty boxes that were shoved in the shelves, "I can get the information by tomorrow night. And also..." She pulled a box out and placed it on the table, the dust going everywhere causing the girls to cover their mouths and eyes. "Didn't think I would be taking these out again now." She opened the box revealing the content.

"Oh…it's a blast from the past." Nico took out some old worn out black gloves and headlamp. "Wait, why do you even have these…and why is this box labeled cospla-Oh my god, no!" Nico dropped the gloves in realization as her hands were burned. "You did not!"

Nozomi only smirked. "Don't be dramatic, Nico. It was only once."

"Oh my god!"

"Once what?" Rin asked with an innocently curious look.

"Well, Rin-chan. When two people love each other very much, sometimes they show it by-"

"STOP."


The night finally came and they were already prepared. Nico was dressed in her all black hoodie and sweats; she covered her face with the hood and calmly walked up to the mansion, outside of the gate. "Got the visual of the place." Nico mumbled to the ear piece, adjusting the front so the small video cam attached to the collar had a better view.

"All good from this end too. I have the perfect view." Nozomi's voice was heard from the earpiece as Nico turned the corner—pressing her back against the gated fence and turning her head, glancing around casually.

"Really lucked out since Nishikino is out on a business trip." Nico chuckled.

"Not fair, Nico…I wanted to come with…" Rin's voice barely heard in the background.

Nico hoisted herself easily over the gate, jumping down into the property. "You lost at Rock, Paper, Scissors. So too bad, maybe next time." With ease she already started scaling the side of the mansion, gripping onto a roof drain and heaving herself up.

"There will definitely NOT be a next time." Nozomi's voice said sternly and in the background Nico could clearly hear Rin going "Awwww!"

"Whatever you say, mom." Nico rolled her eyes as she reached an alarm box, she quickly unlocked it with ease—clipping one of the wires and connecting it to a small metal box. The box beeped and a time showed up on the small LCD screen, ticking down.

"If I'm the mama then Elicchi is definitely the papa!"

"Don't even start that with me, woman." Nico swung towards a window and unlocked it easily, slipping in.

"Nico is so cool!"

"Yes, I know. I'm the coolest~" Nico sang quietly as she entered the dark room. "Where would the great rich Nishikino keep his valuables, Nozomi?"

"Exit the room and go down the hallwa-"

"Nozomi? What are you doing? And who's this?"

Eli's voice could be heard in the background and there were several clatters on the other line. "Nozomi? Nozomi? Shit…" Nico cursed under her breath as she could barely make out her partners trying to come up with a story to the party-crasher.

Nico glanced around, the dark hallway. The sound of Nozomi and Rin still talking in her ear as they try to get out of the situation.

"Ick…" Nico took the earpiece out as she started hearing Nozomi giving Eli that mushy gushy love talk. "Dammit, Nozomi…" Nico quickly entered a room as quietly as she could. The room was dark and Nico did her best to try and make out her surroundings. She was in a bedroom…hopefully a guest bedroom. As she tried to make her way through the room her foot tripped over something and she landed ungracefully with an oof.

"Ngk?! Who's there?" A drowsy voice spoke out in the dark and Nico felt her heartbeat pick up.

'Oh shit!'

The lights turned on and a young red-headed girl looked around before her drowsy eyes landing over at Nico—eyes widening and eyebrows furrowing down. "Who the hell are you?!"

"…Uh…I'm just a figment of your imagination…" Nico said lamely and the girl looked at her with an unamused angry expression in her purple eyes.

"…I'm calling security…" She simply said and reached for the phone.

The thief panicked and lunged over at the girl in the bed with a dictionary—that was the cause of her downfall—in her hands. With a mighty swing, she swung the dictionary right at the girl's head, a loud thud resonated in her ears. The red-haired girl reeled back, groaning in pain; her eyes rolled to the back of her head, and she flopped back on the bed.

Nico looked at the now unconscious girl and then the dictionary in her hand. "Hah...talk about using your words." She grinned victoriously before gasping and dropping the book, looking back at the girl. "Ah shit…never mind about lame one-liners! The hell am I going to do now?!"

"Nico! What's happening?!" Rin's voice could be heard from the earpiece and Nico shoved the small device back into her ear. "Rin! Goddammit, where's Nozomi?! I'm royally screwed! I'm as screwed as...as…I'm as screwed as…I can't even come up with something clever right now because I'm just so screwed!"

"Nozomi just dragged that blonde chick back upstairs. What happened?"

"I was seen, and the timer is almost up!" Nico began sweating. The alarm was going to be back up soon enough, but there was no way she could just leave this girl here now that she has seen Nico's face.

"There was no time. With no other choice—Nico hoisted the girl over her shoulder; grunting at the weight, before opening the window in the room. "Rin, the heist failed. I'm leaving the mansion, I need you to meet me with the van as soon as possible!"

"Aye aye, captain!"

Rin made her way to Nico as quickly as possible and so here they were…in Nozomi's basement with a girl tied to a chair. Nico was seated on another chair, leaning forward on the backrest and Nozomi was standing next to her staring at the unconscious girl. Rin was near the entrance of the door, hiding her face slightly as she peeked into the room.

"From thieves to kidnappers…how did you mess up on a heist so badly, Nico…?" Nozomi sighed, rubbing her temples with a forced smile. "What happened to the great Ruby-Eyed Devil; Master Thief?"

"Shaddup…this is partially your fault…" Nico grumbled and grimaced staring at the girl, "This is exactly how I'd imagined what your basement would end up looking like sooner or later."

"Save the kinky sex jokes when we're not horribly screwed."

Nico looked over at Rin who was still nervously peeking into the room. "Rin, get your ass in here before Eli sees you and wanders in again."

"Uh…" Rin nervously gulped as she stared at the tied-up girl. "I think we're going to be in big trouble…nyah…"

Both girls glanced at each other with raised eyebrows before looking back at the younger girl. "That's an understatement, Rin. We already know we're pretty screwed." Nico sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.

Rin pointed a shaky finger at the red-head. "That's Nishikino Maki…she's the daughter of Nishikino Mako…" her face completely pale and sweat dripping down her face. "…and I also have classes with her…"

Nico and Nozomi looked over at Rin then back at the girl they kidnapped before looking at each other—face paling at the realization.

"Oh…my…god…"


Author's Rambling: lol, they're screwed.

I have a few ideas for this story and of course I am going to finish my other stories.

...Someday.

...

Heh. Bye.

(If you enjoyed this, please feel free to drop a review.)


RRWhitey signing out!