You hate him. God it was amazing how much you hate him. His ugly buck teeth and his ratty ghost-busters tee. He reeks of cake and sweets that practically rots your teeth when you walk by him. What you hate most is definitely what's behind those thick black frames that cried "nerd." Those god damn sky-blue eyes that always bore into your being, trying to drill holes into your sunglasses makes your blood boil.
All you want to do when you see him is beat the shit out of him. How dare he be around you? Look at him and then look at you. You were the complete opposite of this loser and he knew it but still approaches you. Your mouth remains shut. Why? You don't know.
"Dave" his squeaky voice cries, "it's great to see ya!" It makes you almost lose it. But all you do is sit there and nod. He smiles, exposing his buck teeth, and sits down in his assigned seat.
What really pisses you off is when you sit with your bro, Karkat at lunch and that loser sits across from you and next to your bro. And then exchange a peck on the cheek as a greeting. Everyday, it pisses you off more and every time it feels like you're going to spew chunks. So what if they're dating? He should stay away. Karkat is fine, just enough of irony and sarcasm that you can deal with him, but why would he date a loser like John? Even if it was for the irony, it's not worth it.
When they break up weeks later you don't find it weird that you're relieved. He was a nerd anyways. But what was weird was how you feel when you see the little dork. Excitement, maybe even a hint of...happiness. Like something inside you stirred.
You deny it, of course.
But when Karkat shares that John likes you, you aren't disgusted. You're excited. He says that he wouldn't be upset if you went after him.
You tell him you never said you were gay. He says that you never had to tell him for it to be obvious. He tells you to give John a second chance. You finally agree after a million lectures and pushes from your bro and Rose and Jade.
With the months going by you realize that you were only angry at the fact that John was too adorable for his own good. His cute little buck teeth, and easily recognizable ghost-busters tee. The way he smells like sweets that make you crave his scent more. And those gorgeous sky-blue eyes that curiously pondered who was surrounding him.
All you want to do when you see him is kiss his cute, cute face.
And when you finally do he blushes a fierce crimson almost matching your eyes. He softly giggles and his fingers entwine with yours. Karkat tells you to lay off the PDA around him and John laughs more. You're happy they ended on such well terms that it's obvious they're friends.
Some days are harder than others but most are fine. You and him often bicker but it's like an old married couple rather than a serious fight.
When you first came in with a black eye he yelped and started crying. It's really okay. You told him. You'd be fine.
No Dave. He said. You're not alright. You're all bruised up and I don't want to see you this way.
He cried and cried and you felt terrible.
Every other time you get hurt you covered it up to spare you and your boyfriend the tears.
John came in once with a bruise on his wrist. He said it was from the quarter back. You had to control yourself from killing that kid.
John begs you to stop hitting this kid. Violence isn't the answer. He said.
You didn't ask the right question then. You said to him.
He lowered his eyes but you both got through that day. And the next day and ten days after that and thirty days after that. And two years after that. And four years after that. And so on.
Even the days that he couldn't help but be sad and cry. Even the days that you couldn't help but be completely silent. You both survived those days together. And you wouldn't have it any other way.