I still wake up in the morning, expecting to feel her lying beside me. I still feel the crushing grief when I realize she's gone. Forever. Because of me. Because I met her, she's gone. Every morning I wake up to that soul destroying thought.

Nagisa Furukawa. The love of my life. The mother of my child. The highlight of my entire existence. Meeting her was the best thing that ever happened to me and the worst thing that ever happened to her. If we had never met, she would still be here. Living. Being happy. Making friends, experiencing new things, doing everything she dreamed of doing. I never imagined when I met her that one day I would come to love this girl. That one day she would be my entire world. In the short time it took me to fall in love with her, my life changed in a way I never realized it could. I began to love everyday at school, to have fun and enjoy my life. To make new, happy memories that would block out all the bad things that had happened throughout my life.

I wonder, what would my life have been like if I never met Nagisa? Would I be happy? Would I have met another girl, one who wasn't as fragile, as delicate as Nagisa. But, even if I did...there could never be another Nagisa. She was the only one I ever loved. The only one I ever cared about. I just don't understand why God or whoever it is watching over us, would let me have so much happiness, then take it away. Everything was perfect. I had married the girl I loved and she was having my baby. I would have a family, something I never thought I could have after my mom died. And then, it all ended. Just like it had never happened. The only thing that proved Nagisa existed at all was her baby. Ushio, the one dream Nagisa couldn't accomplish. She was so determined to have that baby, so convinced it would all be alright. Was it just an impossible dream on her part?

I can't even look at Ushio without the memories flooding back. I can't look at her face without seeing Nagisa's eyes, Nagisa's face. I can't look after my own child, which is another kind of pain. I can't be a father, I can't live Nagisa's dream. I'm useless, a shell of what I once was. If it weren't for Akio and Sanae...I don't know what would have happened to that child. They have been the parents I couldn't be. I know how unfair the situation is, to have to look after your dead daughters child. They should hate me but I've never once received any ill treatment from either of them. They have supported me through it all, even though they lost their own child. I can't imagine what I put them through. I can't imagine what I put Ushio through. I can't imagine what Nagisa would think if she were still here.

I have done nothing but remember since Nagisa left us. Remember all the smiles and laughter. All the pain and the tears. All those dear memories that I'll always hold close in my heart, no matter how much time passes. Time does pass. Slowly but it does pass. But no matter how many days, months, years or decades slip away, I'll never forget Nagisa Furukawa. Not until the day I die.

A/N: Hello! I've never written a Clannad fanfic before! I loved the anime so, so, much! The feels were incredible! I have never watched an anime that made me cry as much as Clannad~After Story~ did! *remembers Ushio and cries*