Disclaimer- They aren't mine.
A/N- A friend of mine got married today, and this idea sort of just came to me. It's a bit cliched, but I think it's sort of cute. I had actually thought of doing this for a different couple, different show, awhile ago, but I felt like it actually fit better for Will and Liz. This is also the first time I've had Jack Sparrow make an appearance in one of my stories. Just a random fact that I thought I'd throw out there. :D
Apparently I should say that this story takes place in modern times. I figured I wouldn't have to say that in the author's note because the language the characters use and especially the last line tells you this is modern. I guess I was mistaken.
Jitters
When Will had proposed to her, Elizabeth had been a bit surprised, excited, and overwhelmingly in love. When Elizabeth had been planning all of the details for the wedding, right down to the exact ratio of irises to orchards to freesias in the bouquets, she had been calm and ready to begin her life with Will. Last night, as she lay awake for hours, realizing that in 24 hours she would be Will's wife, she had been absolutely elated. She had even laughed out loud in sheer joy.
But now, an hour before she had to walk down the aisle to the man she loved, Elizabeth was anxious. She was more then anxious, she was downright besides herself, worrying over the most minute of details that were suddenly apocalyptic to the nervous bride.
Ana, her maid of honor, smiled bemusedly as her friend paced like a lioness across the small waiting room, no more than 10 feet by 10 feet. She had to have at least walked a mile by now, her uncomprehending friend figured. And in those heels it was a small wonder.
Elizabeth's dress swished as she turned on her heel again, the train of the expensive dress trailing half a pace behind her. Pretty soon she would get caught in the extra material, trip in her very high heels and would have to be pushed down the aisle in a wheelchair. Ana didn't really fancy having to explain that to Will. Or Elizabeth's overbearing father, for that matter.
"Liz, stop worrying!" Ana said with a laugh, setting down the magazine she had been idly flipping through. A wedding magazine, no less. As if she hadn't had enough wedding talk from her best friend. "You have absolutely nothing to be worried about," she tried to reassure Elizabeth.
Elizabeth turned to look at her friend, a half mad look in her eyes. "Nothing to worry about? Ana, I have overlooked EVERYTHING. I mean, I haven't thought of even the most obvious things!" Elizabeth's voice reached a higher pitch as her hysteria started to seize control of her body. "I mean, what if Will likes to read before he goes to bed? What then, Ana?!"
Ana raised an eyebrow at the mess of nerves that had at one time been her friend Elizabeth. This was so unlike Elizabeth, who was always levelheaded and rational. If anyone was more emotional, it was Ana.
"What's wrong if Will reads before he goes to bed...?" Ana asked, utterly bewildered and sure that she had missed some train of thought here.
"What's wrong?!? What if I want to go to sleep, but Will wants to read? You know I can't sleep if there is any light on! And Will can't read if there is no light!" Elizabeth looked like she was on the verge of tears.
"Well... I think that Will would either agree to turn off the light or read in another room," Ana said, in an odd turn the rational one of the two best friends.
Something in Elizabeth's face sobered a bit. Ana smiled and congratulated herself a bit. She would just have to remind her dear friend of this very moment when she accused her of being irrationally emotional. Thinking that she had successfully averted the disaster, she picked up her magazine again. But Elizabeth was not finished.
Hardly. Elizabeth let out a strangled, but thankfully dry, sob.
"What's wrong now, Liz?" Ana said, still amused with her friend but a bit alarmed as well.
"I don't know anything about the man I'm about to marry, Ana! I don't even know if he likes to read before he goes to bed!!" As Elizabeth's voice steadily grew louder, Ana silently thanked God that this room doubled as a cry room and was soundproof. "And more than that, Ana! What if, after we've fought about him turning the light off and he angrily turned it off to make me, little princess that I am, happy, what if he likes to sleep with the comforter around his waist? I like it all the way up to my shoulders! If it's down at his waist, then it won't go all the way around my shoulders, and if it is all the way around my shoulders, then it will be higher than his waist, and he will be uncomfortable all night because of me!"
"Liz--"
"And what if he likes his space when he is sleeping? I take up a whole queen bed as it is, Ana! I'm going to be all over him! So then, he will have turned off the light earlier then he wanted to, he will have the comforter riding uncomfortably high, and to make things even better, I will be sprawled all across the bed, and he won't be able to sleep at all. Because of me!"
"I don't think he will object to you being all over him, Elizabeth," Ana said with a smirk, trying to make her friend laugh, and hopefully realize how ridiculous she was being at the same time. No luck. She might as well not have said anything to begin with.
"And then, it will be morning. Will won't have slept at all, so he will be grumpy and angry with me. And then he expects his breakfast. Oh, God, his breakfast! What does he like to eat for breakfast every morning?! Does he like a big breakfast, or a small one?! Will he expect me to make him breakfast every morning?! What does he consider the main meal of the day?! Does he eat a small lunch and a big dinner?! Or a big lunch and a small snack later at night for dinner?! I don't know, Ana! How can I not know any of this?!"
"Liz, this is Will. I've never met a more understanding man in my life. I'm sure he will be willing to compromise with you over meals, regardless of what his schedule of eating was before today," Ana said in one breath, trying to get some logic into the conversation again.
"And then! And then, Ana... the dishes!! Who's going to do the dishes?! I can't believe we never talked about who was going to do the dishes! We are absolutely doomed as a couple!! I might as well not marry him today, it will save us the hassle of getting a divorce!" At this point, Elizabeth lost it, and her body shook with dry sobs.
Ana stood up and went to her overwrought friend. "Elizabeth, listen to me," she said in a soft, soothing voice, pulling her virginally white friend to herself, "Elizabeth, you have to calm down. You are being ridiculous right now. Do you even realize what you are saying?"
Elizabeth's sobbing stopped and her sagging shoulders went back a bit, much to Ana's relief.
"I need to talk to Will," Elizabeth said. At least her voice was its normal pitch, Ana observed. Her rationality... questionable.
"Elizabeth, just take a deep breath. You can talk to Will about it after the ceremony," Ana promised. Truth was, Ana was scared what Elizabeth might say to Will if Ana brought him to her. After all, she had just told Ana that she might as well not marry him.
"Ana, please! I need to talk to Will!" her friend pleaded with her. Her eyes no longer had that crazed gleam in them, and the girl she knew as Elizabeth was slowly coming back.
Still, Ana hesitated. "What are you going to say to him?"
"I just... I have to know which of us will do the dishes!" Elizabeth said with a pathetic pout.
"You promise? That's all you will ask him? You won't call off the wedding?"
"Why would I do that, Ana? Do you think I'm crazy?" Ana raised her eyebrow at Elizabeth, who at least had the grace to look embarrassed. "Look, I'm okay now. I just... I just NEED to know who is going to do the dishes before I marry him! You'll understand when you marry Jack. ...Please, Ana?" Elizabeth pleaded, giving her friend the most pitiable puppy dog stare.
Sighing, Ana relented. "Fine, I'll go find Jack. He can bring Will here. And don't change the subject to me and Jack, missy," Ana said, giving her friend a mock glare. Ana was glad, for the sake her friend, to see that Elizabeth gave her a self-satisfied smirk. But if it weren't her wedding day, Ana might have set Elizabeth right. But, it was Elizabeth's big day, and she had already proved herself to be a little emotionally unstable. Ana would just store it up for another day.
"Look, just don't run away while I'm gone, okay?" Ana said, as she left the room.
"Okay... oh! And tell Will that he can't look at me when he comes here, okay? It's bad luck, and we don't need any more bad luck!"
Rolling her eyes exasperatedly, Ana left the room to go find her currently ex-boyfriend.
Not unexpectedly, she found him entertaining some relative of Elizabeth's that was wearing something could hardly be constituted a dress. Hating Elizabeth for making her do this, she walked over to the arsehole she couldn't stop herself from loving.
"Listen, where's Will?" Ana said, turning her back to the girl in the pillowcase/dress.
"Oh, I -- er -- I stepped out to make sure that that old Bootstrap had the rings," Jack said, averting Ana's glare and giving a quick glance at the girl tapping her foot behind her.
"Ahem -- right. Anyway, Elizabeth would like Will to go talk to her."
Confusion crossed Jack's face comically, and he looked suspiciously at Ana. "She wants Will to go see her?"
"Well... technically no. In fact, she specifically instructed me that he couldn't see her. But he needs to go talk to her, yes." Jack apparently couldn't follow a word she said. Damn him and his tart-riddled mind. What was so appealing about a girl wearing a pillowcase, anyway? But getting back to the point here... "Where is Will, Jack? I'll just get him myself," she said, angry and proud. She had no patience for the likes of Jack Sparrow anymore.
"Here, I'll go with you," he said, cupping her elbow and leading her away from the tart. Ana couldn't help but smirk as she saw the girl's offended face.
Soon Jack led her into a private room, smaller even then Elizabeth's little prison cell. Will was sitting in the corner. For being a large guy, Ana couldn't help but notice how shrunken he looked. The poor boy was obviously as nervous as his bride. He looked up at Jack and Ana as they entered and swallowed hard. His black tuxedo made his blanched face look all the whiter and waxier.
"Elizabeth wants to talk to you," Ana said. If possible, his face lost even more color. She extended a hand to him. Looking lost, he grabbed it and allowed her to pull him up.
"C'mon, Willie, ol' boy," Jack said, in his ever present slur.
"Don't worry, Will. She just wants to talk to you," Ana tried to reassure him. He nodded mutely, but Ana wasn't sure if he actually understood a word she had said. He looked a bit like a prisoner being led to the block, Ana and Jack as his jailers on either side.
"Cover your eyes," Ana said as the approached Elizabeth's room. "She says it's bad luck for you to see her." Again, the muted nodding and the automatic obedience. And then they sent him in.
Meanwhile, Elizabeth had resumed her pacing. Her hands were sweaty and couldn't stop fixing or fidgeting with something. She bit her lips until they were purple. Back. Forth. Back. Forth. Her feet were killing her. At this rate, she would be crying from sheer pain as she made that final pace up the aisle. Normally she would be pulling on her hair, her usual nervous habit, but it was up in a complicated bun. If she pulled it out just to ease her nerves, Ana would most likely kill her before she got to marry Will. So, Elizabeth had to find different ways to calm herself down. Back. Forth. Back. Forth. At least she had passed the hysterical stage. But now she felt an odd sort of numbness. On one of her paces, she had left her stomach behind, and it still hadn't caught up with her. What was taking them so bloody long to get Will? She needed to see him, to feel and smell his warm familiarity. Oh God, what if he was having doubts? Now her heart had been left behind too. Oh God, Oh God, Oh God. Back. Forth. Back. Forth.
She turned on her heel just in time to see Will open the door and the flail his arms around, trying to get some sort of a bearing as he entered the room with his eyes firmly closed shut.
"Will!" Elizabeth said, and as if his name were the magic spell, all her body parts caught up with her again. She noticed a bit of color rise in his own pallid skin at the sound of her voice. She ran forward to him, even though her feet cried as she did so. She grabbed his wrists, which were still flailing wildly about himself, and pulled them to her cheeks. Immediately, she felt a calmness spread through her body, and her eyes fluttered shut at his warm touch. There was silence as they reveled in the feeling of each other, both being comforted.
"What did you need me for?" Will asked finally. At his voice Elizabeth's nerves were eased even more, and she felt overwhelmingly in love again. She opened her eyes to look at his face, which now was flushed and human again. His eyes were still squeezed shut, and he had never looked more endearing to her. Then she remembered his question, and why he was here to begin with.
"Oh! I was going over everything, and I realized something dreadful! We never talked about who would do the dishes!" Elizabeth explained the dilemma to him.
"What?!" Will asked, and his eyes flew open in disbelief.
"Will!! You can't see me before the ceremony!!" Elizabeth shrieked, covering his eyes with her hand.
"Okay, okay. They're shut," he said, grabbing her hand away from his face and holding it tight in his own. "What I mean was, that's what you wanted to talk to me about?"
"...Yes!" Elizabeth said. Did no one else realize the importance of this? "Will, we can't not have a designated washer of dishes! I mean, it's not a fun job, and neither of us would want to do it, so the pile of dishes would just sit there until, in our disgust and anger at the other, one of us would do them. And this would go on for years, Will! It could be what makes our marriage fail!" Elizabeth explained, getting even more excited as she went on. It didn't help that Will was beginning to laugh at her. "Do you not realize the importance of this, William Turner?! I'm trying to save our marriage here! And you are LAUGHING at me!"
"Elizabeth, Elizabeth! Goodness, Liz. I've never been more in love with you in my life," he said as he continued to laugh. His whole body shook, and Elizabeth could feel her body vibrating with his.
"I don't understand," Elizabeth said, smiling at his words but still stung that he was laughing at her. AT her!
"Here I am worried about how you will cope with all the things those old bats out there are whispering about me, and about you for marrying me. And about how your side of the church is looking disdainfully at my side, who, let's face, are all most likely a little bit less than sober. And about how your father hardly gave me his blessing to marry you. And about how your father and my father are at daggers drawn with each other over the cost of this thing and who is paying for what. And about how the entire town is currently whispering that the governor's daughter is marrying a menial laborer like me. And how almost everyone has a countdown going on how long we will be able to remain together before the pressure of society pulls us apart. And about how you will feel moving into a small house with me, after living in your father's mansion. And about how we won't have any room if we ever decide to have children. And how I'm utterly undeserving as someone as beautiful and perfect as you are. And then you... you are worried about who will do the dishes?" Will let another shout of laughter out. "I. have. never. loved. you. more. Elizabeth Swann," he said, punctuating his sentence with quick little kisses all over her upturned face. "I'm so glad that all you are worried about is the dishes. Because I can fix that problem. I can do dishes."
Elizabeth finally found the humor in the situation and laughed with Will. "I've never loved you more either, William Turner. You are the sweetest man I've ever known. I don't care what everyone out there is saying about us. We know the truth." Elizabeth brought his face down to her own and kissed him hard.
"Besides, we could always just get a machine dishwasher."