A/N: Well, I got this crazy idea for a one-shot, we've all seen the promo/ext. promo ( Or I hope we all have) and when I saw Blair asking Chuck to say "I love you" , I realized I wanted Chuck to man up and say it himself (without having someone lead him to saying it), and I thought well how could that still be possible with that scene, and I figured out WHAT IF!!!! Chuck was just dreaming Blair asked him to say it and thats how I came up with this fanfic, I hope you like it. I want to say THANK YOU SO SO SO MUCH Shandiii (SHANDERS) without you I totally wouldn't of posted this, SO thank you!
(To "I'm All Choked Up" readers, I know, I know I'm horrible with updating, but I'm having some school backups, and its making me not have enough time to focus on writing the way I want to, don't worry the story is not at all over or finished, I will update, I just need time to work out my school stuff, thank you so much for being patient and amazing readers!!!)
Enjoy!
The room is dimly lit with candles, still it's very dark I can only see the shadows of everything past the pillows on the floor, the room holds a type of warmth and comfort, I like it, but something makes me want to crawl up in a ball and hide. Maybe I'm having a nightmare, it doesn't seem like it could be one though, most of my nightmares have a phone call about the passing of him, or… her. Or the impact of a car crash, and then the worst nightmares involve her crying over me. But none of that was happening; no one was around me, just myself and I. Sitting on this awkward lounge couch, that I'm usually very comfortable on, but not now though. Something about the room felt almost inappropriate. I had to chuckle at that thought, because when is anything inappropriate for Chuck Bass.
"Well seeing as nothing is happening besides the flickering of the candles, I would really love to GET out of here!"
... Just when I was about to say wake up you fucking idiot BASS! I heard the door creaking open, I couldn't see if someone was there coming in, but I felt the draft and I saw the candle's fire move more then just a flicker, so I knew the door had opened. I waiting for my eyes to settle and focus on the shadows in this fucking dark room, but I still can't make anything out,…except I hear the weight of the floor shifting, and I can almost make out a…shiny silver thing, I have this extreme urge to reach for it, but can't, or I'm just scared too. I watch as it comes closer, and I start tensing up, when the HELL do I tense up! That thought hit me hard, because I DON'T tense up, at least not unless…
My eyes finally focused and I could see a figure's shadow just standing in the dark, just staying far enough from the flickering candles that I can't be sure of who's there, or what's there. I still can see the shiny silver thing dangling off the person or thing, I squint my eyes for better vision, but no use. My breathing was really hard and heavy, I hadn't realized but I was panting of some sorts, and clenching the odd lounge chair, I waited for my breathing to calm, and just sat there waiting for the shadow's next move, so I could see that silver thing dangling and become clearer. I felt like I knew where I was, and what everything was, but I didn't. It was like I was somewhere I'd been before, just not like this. I couldn't register anything properly, but before I could let my head do anything else or think about anything else, the shadow peeked out of the dark and I watched as the candle light flickered over her face, and made her eyes sparkle. I saw how her skin was giving off a warm glow from the light. I looked at her neck and saw the silver shiny thing just lying their on her neck line, it was "the" necklace, the one I had given her so long ago on her birthday. I couldn't just keep staring so I spoke.
"Blair?"
All I could say was Blair… Are you KIDDING ME! What the hell Chuck, get it together! I waited for some kind of response and when she didn't respond I questioned her "Are you ok?" she looked at me and smiled I wasn't prepared for her to be smiling at me, or really even being in the same room without giving me some hostile "I'm going to kill you" look, but she was smiling, I waited.
"I'm perfect. You?" she said as she moved closer and became clearer in the light.
My throat felt like it was closing, but I still managed to get out a few stuttered words
"Good…I'm good".
Right when I was about to stand up and start up some Chuck Bass like conversation, I was stopped when she dropped her dress, which I didn't even realize she was wearing till now that it was on the floor by my feet. She was just there in some very… well interesting under-garments that I really don't want to describe to myself, for sanity purposes.
I just stared, probably with my jaw wide open, and drooling, she lowered herself to me, putting her knees on the pillows that were lying on the floor, so now she was leveled with me, but still a bit above me. I couldn't breathe, Blair Waldorf was just so, so… divine even with clothes on, she really could make a man go insane with one look, let alone no clothes. I have so many things running throughout my head, that I can't decide what to do, do I stand up and tell her to get up and put back on her robe, or do I lunge at her like Chuck Bass would… or DO I JUST WAKE UP!... Am I even fucking sleeping! But before I could decide on any of those things, she started shifting and coming closer to me, she looked me straight in the eyes and did that smile again, I couldn't help but smile back. Now I feel like I'm leading her into something, which I don't want to do, but at the same time I do! She leaned in and I could feel the heat of her body and I swear I could hear her heart beat. It was going extremely fast, that made me think it might be mine. With my dumb head not shutting up, I missed her movements, she had her hands on me, one on my leg, and it wasn't fair! And her other hand was in my hair, she was twirling my hair in between her fingers, and I just wanted to put my face on her shoulder and relax in her comfort, but ONE she was almost naked, and TWO I'm not even sure I'm awake, so doing that and this wouldn't really be anything, I'm so confused and debating with myself it's almost giving me a headache. I stared in her eyes looking for unhappiness, or her being unsure, but she seemed so passionate, and wanting I really couldn't resist, I led my hand up the arm she had on my leg and followed the arm up to her neck, I rested my hand on her neck, while letting my thumb run over the heart of the necklace, and I shifted my body closer to the edge of seat. My other hand went to her back, I wanted to make sure she wouldn't fall backwards or become unstable and fall, so I made sure my hand was securing her. She smiled again while I rubbed the heart and I smiled back AGAIN, you're such an ass Bass, your doing everything you've been trying not to do to her! Her hair was so pretty in the candle's flickering lights, it made her brown locks shine, and she smelt like flower petals, I let the Chuck Bass I know lead my actions, and I pulled her into me, almost hugging her, and I could feel her warm skin against my own body, she started unbuttoning my shirt and almost giggling while doing so, I brought her eyes back up to me, by lifting her chin with my hand, and I made sure she wanted this
"Blair, you sure?"
That's when I saw something completely different in her eyes it was like one moment she seemed so sure, and craving, and then now I saw tears whelming in her eyes, and I could see her nose reddening and her cheeks too. I pushed her hands off my shirt and looked away from her disgusted with myself, and I refocused and pushed her away, not hard but gently, I just needed her away, and I didn't want to hurt her anymore, NIGHTMARE, defiantly a nightmare again! "Chuck" I stopped my head from bashing its thoughts around, and looked in her eyes again, she still had tears welling over, and she put her hands on my face holding me there, she looked at me with what seemed like everything she had, and spoke quietly and soft, almost choking out the words. "Tell me…,"she looked down quickly and then back at me "- you love me Chuck." I froze, I grabbed her hands that were holding my face, and I gripped her hands and lowered them as I intertwined our fingers. She kept her eyes on mine, and I wanted to dive into her deep brown dark eyes and just hide, she was everything to me, and I wanted all of it. She gave me that hard smile, that takes all her strength to put it on, and I couldn't smile back, I frowned, and looked down at my feet. I felt her hands coming out of mine and her fingers untwining, it made me want to scream, I tried grabbing her hands back, she looked up at me and it made me feel like I was dying, she had tears flowing out of her eyes and falling off the tip of her nose, her lips parted and she kissed me, I didn't respond, and before I got to move, or say a word, she talked all choked up and sniffling, she wiped her tears and looked me in the eyes again with the most heartbreaking look I knew it all to well by now
"Its ok, I really never thought you would. I don't expect you to really ever say it Chuck."
I know my face had a broken look, I had never felt like this, besides the time I wrote her that letter after I cried in her arms, and got the first sleep I had in weeks that night. It was like pulling apart my heart one by one, as I looked up to find her eyes; I saw the necklace on her neck sparkle that's when everything went black
My body jolted up and I opened my eyes, I was completely drenched in sweat, and my hands were gripping the sheets, I released my grip on the sheets and lifted my body up so I was sitting up on my bed. I looked around slowly rubbing my neck and trying to just calm down, my heart was racing, and I felt moisture on my face, when I lifted my hands to my face I felt tears on my cheeks and right beneath my eyes. I had been crying in my sleep, Chuck Bass was crying over a dream… scratch that, not a dream but a nightmare. The only thing I wanted right now was to hold her in my arms and fall asleep with her by me. I wanted to tell her I love her, you reach a point when you know you have to fucking man up and tell the girl you care about, how you really feel. It's that point where you dream ABOUT TELLING HER! "I'm so fucking fucked." I fell back to my pillows and moaned out of annoyance and aggravation. I stared at my ceiling trying not to fall back asleep.
"I love you, Blair Waldorf." I sighed. "Now, could I stop telling everyone including myself that, and tell her."
A/N: If you have any thoughts or comments, review! :) thank you for taking the time to read this one-shot, it means alot!