I was feeling angsty when I started this fic but it gets happier… I think.

Thanx to my chik PrEtTyInPiNk for being such a nice editor and friend. I'm going to get on with it now so I hope you enjoy (my very first fic, well kinda)

Rated PG13 just to be safe. I don't know what my wee little mind will think up.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing. : )

It would be 1:30 in the afternoon before Relena Daralin would finally rise out of bed. This was understandable being as she had stayed out partying until seven in the morning with her new group of friends. This was not the first night she had done this, nor would it be the last, but no matter what, she would never be told to stop. She had become untouchable; everyone was scared to say no to her just because she was once queen. She wasn't even sure why she still was so respected. Her new way of acting was known to the whole world through those goddamn paparazzi. So she beat the living shit out of one of those shit-eating reporters and had to go to court? All she got was community service, three weeks in anger management and she was allowed to keep her job, so why did the reporters make such a big deal out of it?

All she knew was that she wanted to be left alone and she wanted to forget; forget her stupid place as Vice-Foreign Minister, which she knew she didn't deserve to be, but ESUN was afraid of putting her anywhere else. She wanted to forget about her brother Zechs, and his accident two years ago that left him dead and left his wife Noin alone with their one-month old boy, Miles. She wanted to erase the name Heero Yuy from her memory forever. Now, he was just a figment of her imagination that tortured her everyday she lived. She loved him and thought they could finally settle down once peace was achieved but that didn't happen. He just walked away and was never seen again. Peace took her precious Heero away from her, the only thing she ever needed.

She thought that maybe the war a year after the war ofA.C.196 would bring him back but it didn't. The four remaining gundam pilots took to a couple of Leos and won the war without their leader. The fight just wasn't the same without Heero's passion for battle and victory. Quatre couldn't lead them all the time and the pilots did not come out of the war as heroes but as forgotten soldiers who were once the greatest pilots both on earth and in space. They felt like they lost the war and going home was the hardest thing they'd ever tried to do in their short, expendable lives.

They split up once the war was over and tried to go back to their normal jobs. Wufei went back to his duty as a preventer though the organization was very different. He found it hard to handle that while he was at war, his friend Sally Po had become Sally Emerson and had quit her job to raise children. She left without a word and when Wufei finally found her, she told him that it would be best if they acted like they didn't know each other. He knew she was probably ashamed of the way he acted during the war; his head wasn't prepared for the Zero system at that time and he knew he got extremely out of hand. We're talking Quatre-out-of-hand here. But is that what really made Sally leave? Could he have stopped her from running away from him? Did he scare her away after all the time he had spent being in love with her and not being able to show it? Maybe if he hadn't been such an egotistical pig, she might have stayed with him long enough to finally saw how he felt. Maybe.

Then there was Quatre who went back to his position as a billionaire businessman and he hated it so. War turned him a bit colder for some reason and afterwards he had soldier's sickness for a while. He pushed away from Trowa and became the world's most eligible bachlor. He went through two or three marriages and divorces but could never find "Miss Right." Maybe because he never admitted he was gay after the war, but who knows?

Trowa's circus company and Duo's machine parts shop both went out of business during the war so the two of them went to work for ESUN as guards to the politicians. (Catherine and Hilde became successful clothing designers after parting ways with their brother and boyfriend). The two of them were a bit too ADD for the job, they never could sit still, but they were the most qualified and worthy of the duty. Shame they got paid shit for putting their asses on the line.

The two ex-pilots turned door guarders were probably the most hated by Relena because they knew Heero the best and they were the most concerned for her. Duo was so close to Heero, he was as crushed as Relena was at first. So how could he get over losing his best friend so quickly? Why did she still have to miss him when Duo was happy again? No one had the right to be happy around Relena, so no one acted such.

She made herself suffer day after day, writing speeches about continued peace but she thought every word was a foolish lie. Her happiest times were during wars, when Heero was around and then when she was so busy that she didn't have time to think about Heero.

Then the day finally came when Relena accepted that he was gone, which was the same day she buried her brother Miliardo Peacecraft or Zechs Marquise as he was called by his former OZ partners. She was pissed when Noin didn't even keep his last name as hers and she married again to a Jim Borenfeld. Zechs's son was two now and had so far never been told that he was the spitting image of his real father. Relena wondered if little Miles would ever know that his name was derived from Miliardo, or if he would always be Miles Borenfeld, the regular boy with a drunk for a dad. She just wished she could spend some time maybe babysitting for him once and a while, she was his godmother for Christ's sake.

Then there was Dorothy who was a complete imbecile in Relena's eyes. She was the only person who attempted to make Relena happy anymore. Even though she never showed it, Relena was very happy to have Dorothy as a roommate so something deep inside her did actually want to be happy.

"Hey sleepyhead," Said Dorothy in a surprised voice, "you're up early. You must have remembered today's meeting for once."

"Where's the coffee?" was Relena's only response and also the only words spoken until the two were outside the meeting room.

~~~~~

Well tell me if I should continue into the conversation with Duo and Trowa outside and into the meeting. I think I know what I want to do with it so I'll be writing it already. Or maybe I should write a flashback about the war without Heero from Relena's perspective. Or maybe about Zech's death and Noin's remarriage. Ahhhh to many thought and ideas. Please help me!!

PLEASE READ AND REVIEW I'll be your best friend, lol.

~CA