Written for NejiHina Week, Day 2: Hyuuga Politics.
I spent much of today working on this, it's five minutes to midnight, and I haven't had time to edit it more than cursorily yet. My apologies for any mistakes I missed!
"You're just going to let them do this to you?" Hanabi demanded, a helpless look of distress on her face which did not suit it at all.
"Hanabi." Hinata soothed, patting her shoulder. "I-"
"I can't believe you!" Hanabi said, shoving her hand off. "I thought you had grown strong, but you're as weak and pathetic as ever!"
The words stung, but Hinata let them slide away and smiled kindly at her sister. "Our clan needs me. And this . . . must happen, if I am to take the place I am needed. If I am to fight for the changes that our clan must make, I must bow to," she paused, swallowing, "certain things."
She was not entirely content, no, but she was at peace with her decision.
"And you think whoever they choose for you will let you just do that, whatever you want?" Hanabi snapped, her mouth twisted into an ugly sneer. "Nee-chan, you have always been so foolish."
Hinata lifted her chin. "He may say what he likes and try to prevent me if he wishes. I will be the Clan Head, and married or no, it is my word that will govern our Clan, not his." she said firmly, eyes hard. "I will not let our clan remain as it has been."
". . .nee-chan, you-" Before Hanabi could say anything else, there was a light rap - their aunt's signature delicate yet demanding pattern - and the door slid open.
Both of them looked at the doorway in silence for a moment, surprised.
". . .Neji?" Hanabi said, then cocked her head, folding her arms across her chest. "What are you doing here?" she asked, with a superior sort of glare, though Neji towered over her and it was difficult for her to look down her nose at him.
Hinata swallowed, her throat suddenly thick. "Neji-nii-san. . ." she said hesitantly, shaking her head slightly. "I- You?"
Neji swallowed, his jaw working visibly, and lifted his chin a little higher.
"What?" Hanabi asked dryly. "Is he supposed to bend his knee to affirm your place above him?" she asked with a sharp little dig in her tone.
"Hanabi, hush." Hinata scolded quietly.
Hanabi turned towards her with a mulish look. "Nee-chan, I-"
"That's not why he's here." Hinata said, her throat tight and her heart thrumming too quickly in her chest. "Oh, Neji-nii-san, I. . ." she trailed off, twisting her fingers together. Neji stepped into the room, leaving the shoji open behind him, though their aunt had clearly already left.
Probably, Hinata thought, swallowing, she anticipated this was not going to go well and didn't want to be present for it - either so as not to have a reason to interfere and undermine Hinata's decision, or in hopes that Hinata would give up when faced with-
Well.
Neji was rather intimidating, and he had nearly killed her, once, for his hurt and hatred.
However rightful his pain had been, and Hinata had never hated him for that . . . but she had been frightened of him, for a time.
"I didn't know." Hinata said, and felt guilty for the soaring twist of relief at seeing him before her. If it was Neji- But Neji would never have wanted this. Hinata couldn't be the one to take yet another thing from Neji that-
Hinata felt a roaring rush of sickness.
She couldn't refuse, either. She had known that. Not if she was to accomplish her goals as Clan Head. That was why she had not hesitated to accept this for herself, why she had not even tried to refuse when the arrangement was presented to her, the council all but smirking behind their cool masks. But how could she face sacrificing Neji for that? Herself, yes, she had been prepared for that, and she had even known that whoever was chosen for her might be less than delighted at the prospect of wedding her, but. . .
"Hanabi." Neji said with almost no inflection. Hanabi bristled slightly, likely at the omission of any honorific, but Neji was always precisely as respectful as he must be and not a single degree further - and Hanabi had never been officially named heir, no matter what had been implied or discussed, and now she would never be. "Would you leave us to speak alone?" It was a request, but it shaded as closely to a demand as Neji would ever voice, to a Souke member.
Hinata was fairly certain that was not something they should be doing, and probably their aunt had left them 'alone' only because she knew Hanabi was present. She reached out and nudged Hanabi gently, encouraging her to go.
Hanabi looked at Hinata, confusion wrinkling her brow and concern for her sister underlying her brattishness. Hinata smiled gently. "Please, Hanabi-chan. We. . . I need to talk with Neji-nii-san." she said, amazed at how steady her own voice remained.
Hanabi huffed, but she obeyed Hinata, glaring at Neji on her way out and all but shoving the shoji back across until it slammed into the frame. Hinata winced, and Neji's eyes narrowed, though he didn't flinch at the sharp snap behind him.
"You didn't know." Neji repeated, his voice cool and even.
Hinata didn't flinch, but she felt something constrict in her chest. "I'm so sorry, Neji-nii-san." she said softly. "I- I had no idea they would choose you."
Neji eyed her for a moment, then arched an eyebrow. "Is the idea of wedding me so terrible?" he asked, and Hinata startled, her fingers locking together from where she had been twisting them against each other nervously.
"I-" Hinata stuttered to a stop, lashes fluttering, confused. "I'm sorry?"
"What are you sorry for?" Neji asked, lifting his jaw a little. Hinata's eyes widened as she noted the faintest tremble in his movement. "Does the thought of wedding me discomfit you so badly?"
"No." Hinata said before she could catch the word back, and Neji's shoulders relaxed the slightest fraction. Hinata felt her cheeks warming. "I only- I agreed, for myself, but I never wanted to be the- the reason anything more was taken from you." She bowed her head slightly, then looked up at him again.
"No?" Neji repeated, with tiny signs of softness showing around his mouth. "But for you, it is all right to have this taken away?"
"This was my choice." Hinata said, swallowing. "Not taken from me. One that I made, even not knowing . . . who the elders would choose. I didn't think-"
"Yet it could be said that this is not so much proposing to take something from me as to give it." Neji said, and Hinata frowned slightly. He raised an eyebrow. "A wife, specifically." he clarified smoothly, though there was a dusting of rosy pink rising over his cheekbones.
"Oh!" Hinata covered her mouth, then ducked her head. "It- It could, I suppose. . . You would- You would not . . . be unhappy?" she asked tentatively, peeking up at Neji again.
"Hinata-sama has always been very important to me." Neji said, meeting her eyes. "It would . . . not displease me to keep her side forever." He cleared his throat and his jaw tightened as his gaze fell away.
Hinata's lips parted as her breath caught, and she took a few careful steps towards Neji.
He looked up, startling a bit to see her there. "I wouldn't-" Hinata reached up, brushing her fingers over his lips to quiet him, and then boldly pressed close, wrapping her arms around Neji's ribs and tucking her head onto his shoulder.
Neji was stiff against her and Hinata's heart raced painfully in her chest, but she didn't step back. Neji took a quick, shallow breath, then another, and then his arms came up around her and squeezed her tightly. Hinata relaxed, tightening her embrace and snuggling her cheek against his shoulder.
"If Neji-nii-san would not be unhappy to marry me," Hinata said softly, nudging a little closer to Neji's neck and probably barely speaking loudly enough for him to hear her even so, "I . . . would be very happy."
Neji's arms tightened around her waist and he tilted his head to rest against hers.
Neji slipped out into the cool night air and took a breath, still feeling faintly stifled but at least less . . . pinned down. He smoothed his hair back from where one of the aunts had disarranged it, again, and continued further away from the door before anyone could follow him outside.
Thinking of the low murmurs he had heard among the aunts, he frowned slightly, considering. He opened up his senses, and when he found the soft pulse of Hinata's chakra - not anywhere near the main house, nor even the dojo - Neji leapt lightly from the porch and followed the feeling.
It took him a few minutes to find her, hidden in the lower branches of a broad oak a good distance away from any of the buildings in the compound. Neji climbed up, finding Hinata tucked in the cradle formed by a curving branch, and crouched nearby.
Hinata smiled at him, and Neji dredged up a smile for her in return. "Are you all right, Hinata-sama?" he asked quietly, leaning forwards on one knee.
Hinata nodded, then ducked her head down into her collar. "It's just . . . a little overwhelming, right now." she said almost apologetically. "I know I shouldn't really, but sometimes I have to get away and be . . . in the quiet. For a while."
"I slipped out as well." Neji admitted, keeping his tone as gentle as he knew how. "I can hardly blame you. I know you would never shirk, Hinata-sama." he added, and she smiled at him. "What was it today?"
"The, ah . . . everything. For the wedding," Hinata flushed brightly at the word, and Neji hid an amused smile, "it's . . . a little much. Sometimes." All the time, Neji heard in her voice.
Neji reached out, brushing her cheek lightly, sweeping a lock of hair aside to give him a better look at her face, her eyes. "Is it worth it?" he asked, then pressed his lips together. He shouldn't have asked her that. It wasn't even something she had chosen on her own, but something she was being forced into, no matter the guilty happiness it brought Neji, even if the choice made for her was not one she hated . . . it hadn't been hers.
Hinata looked up again immediately, eyes widening slightly. She smiled, expression softening again. "Oh. . . It was always going to be worth it." she said, looking away for a moment and taking a deep breath, showing the steel she carried inside that was so easily missed by so many. "Neji. . ." She looked back at him, her eyes sparkling and her smile soft and almost knowing, though her cheeks were still rosy. "Now it is something to look forward to. In itself."
Neji stiffened slightly, and thought belatedly that he might actually be flushing a little himself. "Oh." he said stupidly, and winced. "That's- I'm glad."
Hinata reached out, fingertips brushing just beneath his lips. Neji caught her hand, then dipped his head and kissed her fingers lightly, and watched her blush deepen.
Hinata's fingers curled around Neji's and she tugged him towards herself. Neji hesitated, then obliged, though there wasn't much room any closer to Hinata than he already was. He wound up kneeling almost on top of her, their twined hands between them.
"Neji. . ." Hinata stroked his cheek. "I am happy." she told him, looking right up into his eyes, and Neji swallowed. "Knowing now that you . . . want me too," she licked her lips, her cheeks still faintly pink, "being married to you is the least frightening thing I am proposing to do in this whole. . ."
"Mess?" Neji suggested, amazed that the word came out so smoothly as it did, when he felt so . . . dizzy.
Hinata laughed softly, nodding agreement. She moved, her legs brushing Neji's, and he shifted out of her way only to be surprised when Hinata pulled him back. He found himself nudged into taking her place, and Hinata perching hesitantly over one of his knees.
Neji resituated himself more stably, straightening his knee, and tugged at Hinata's hand, still in his. An invitation rather than a request. Hinata smiled and curled right into his lap, surprising him. He stiffened, but struggled not to show it.
Hinata was soft and warm against him, and her hair brushed his jaw. She smelled like harsh metal and faintly of sweat and more strongly of flowers, and Neji resisted the urge to put his nose in her hair. Hinata might not have minded, though, he thought with some lingering disbelief as she twined their fingers together and leaned comfortably against him.
"Our marriage might not have been a choice I made," Hinata said, and Neji nodded soundlessly, though she couldn't see and probably couldn't really feel it from this angle either, "but finding that it was you they had chosen for me. . ."
"You looked . . . distressed. When I came to you." Neji pointed out quietly, and Hinata tilted her head, looking up at him and then snorting delicately, snuggling into his chest. Neji felt warm, letting his arms curl around her naturally and cradling her close.
"I thought-" Hinata sighed, her head coming to rest on his shoulder as her fingertips traced a spiralling pattern over his heart. "I thought I was being used to take something else away from you. That you would hate it - hate me, even. Even if you didn't then," Hinata said before he could get more than a syllable of protest out, "can you say that you would not, had you not wished- and been forced into a marriage with me?"
Neji frowned, having difficulty picturing it in some ways, and not at all in others. He hugged her tighter rather than answer, and Hinata hummed.
"So I don't frighten you?" Neji asked, giving in to impulse and nuzzling her hair.
Hinata hummed again, soft and breathy. "Not in a long time, Neji." she said quietly, and tucked herself in a little tighter. "And I," she hid her face against his throat, though Neji hadn't been able to see her face where she was already, "I'm looking forward to. . ." she trailed off.
Neji couldn't quite fight a smile, and he squeezed her hand gently, slim fingers twined through his own. "Hinata." he murmured, and she made a soft sound of acknowledgement. ". . .I am too."
Neji felt Hinata's smile against his throat, and rubbed his thumb over the delicate bones of her hand as he shifted to cradle her closer in his lap.