Author's note: This is my first post here and it's a bit of a test really, since the story is almost complete elsewhere, but I've been reading stuff here for a bit too and thought it would be nice to contribute as a thank you to all the readers here. Anyway hope you all enjoy this.

Of Sense and Education Chapter I

"Now are you sure Lizzy?" Charlotte's words reverberated in my head, for what must have been the hundredth time that morning. Taking a deep breath and staring up at the huge townhouse, I was suddenly incredibly unnerved. I laughed lightly, since when had I ever been timid or afraid of new circumstances? No, Miss Elizabeth Bennet had never backed down without a fight and this was not going to be the first time. I turned around and addressed Uncle Gardiner's driver, "Will you wait a moment, please? My bags need to be unloaded." Though the words were polite enough there was a clipped soberness about them, I could hear the rudeness of them and thought to make an apology for such abrupt ill-mannered behaviour so I turned to smile ruefully.

"Very good ma'am."

My knuckle rapped hesitantly against the servants' door and then I took a step away from it, contemplating bolting like a deer. Before the opportunity arose the door was opened, a young footman surveyed me, not saying a word. It was slightly unnerving, he waited patiently for me to speak. "Good afternoon, I'm Elizabeth Bennet, would you be so kind as to take me to Mrs Turner."

He did not speak; just shut the door in my face, I felt all the rudeness of it! Never in my life had anyone behaved in such a manner, quietly I stepped inside, swallowing the prideful feelings that had risen within my breast; I could not behave so now, it was not my place to expect such deference. Within the space of a few minutes the door had been re-opened to reveal a plump, good natured looking middle aged woman, she smiled affectionately, "You must be Miss Bennet." I nodded my head, "Well come along in deary, it's a nippy day, you'll catch your death standing on that cold step all day." A grin broke involuntarily from my solemn face; the lady's mannerisms reminded me of our old housekeeper, Mrs Hill.

Stepping inside I was lead to a chair by the kitchen fire and invited to sit whilst Mrs Turner bustled about, gently scolding the footman for not retrieving my belongings whilst moving about making tea. "I declare it's mighty chilly out there, it'll be a cold winter I'll wager." She muttered tsk-tsking like a friendly mother hen. "Sugar?" she queried handing over a cup and saucer. I gratefully sipped at the warm beverage, whilst Mrs Turner continued to bustle around about occasionally stopping to instruct a maid or two.

Finishing up the drink, I began to observe the room, it was large. A huge wooden work table was placed in the centre, copper pots and pans hung from the walls and ceiling, along with herbs that were being dried out. There was not one but two agar cookers heating the room with a large pan of water boiling on them. A scullery maid was chopping vegetables and another washing the breakfast dishes, both looked tired and drawn.

Mrs Turner bustled back into the room and I politely rose from the chair, "Now, sit ya down, sit ya down!" Mrs Turner instructed mildly, gently pushing me back into my seat, "I'll just have all your belongings settled in your rooms and then I'll show you up there."

"Thank you."

"Bit quiet aren't you? You'll need a lot more assertiveness about you if you want to go teaching those children anything." I tried to smile politely at her assessment of my character; few people would ever describe me that way.

"How many children are there?" I asked politely, there had only been a brief correspondence between myself and the housekeeper, which had been enough to decide on the date of my arrival and wages. I would be receiving 45 pounds a year, and that was very good pay for a governess.

"Three. Two young ladies and a little lad, but he's still young."

"Shall I have the pleasure of meeting them today?" I inquired.

"I shall take you to the nursery later this morning, when you are rested."

"I do not need to rest I have only travelled perhaps four miles, from Gracechurch Street." Mrs Turner seemed to insist that I would still require rest, despite the short distance of my journey. I did not want to tell her that I was not at all fatigued especially since I had been known to walk almost as far. A maid returned and informed Mrs Turner that the room was prepared, and after convincing Mrs Turner I was well enough rested we set off at a brisk pace. The house was in relative silence, the servants worked unobtrusively. The only sound was of Mrs Turners very sturdy boots clacking along the wooden floor. She guided me up several pairs of stairs and across the landing of the servant's floor.

"Your room is next to mine," she indicated to the door to our left, and informed me that the Housekeeper's sitting room was open to my personal use too, should I want it, "You are perfectly welcome. It can become mighty lonesome, with just myself and Mrs Chambers in the evening, especially since neither of us can thread a needle any longer." She indicated for me to enter, and then followed inside. The room, although not luxurious, was nicely fitted, with a bed, armoire, chest, chaise, writing desk, bookshelves and a small piano forte. Whilst I observed all this Mrs Turner began to untie the ribbon on my bonnet and unbutton the front of my plisse for me and hang them up, as if I were a guest. "I'll send Elsie up to unpack for you." She said as she turned to leave.

"That's quite unnecessary I assure you." I began to say but the door had already clicked shut, sinking down gratefully onto the chaise I looked about again. The room as I mentioned was very comfortable, one could not wish for better, it was as large as my chamber at Longbourn and contained everything that I could want for, that did not however mean that I was either resolved or content to be here.

Just how had I ended up here anyhow? How had Miss Elizabeth Bennet, the country gentleman's daughter metamorphosed into an impoverished governess working in London? It began with a tour of Derbyshire, with my Aunt and Uncle Gardiner fifteen months ago now. In Bakewell we received a letter from Jane, which informed us that Lydia had eloped with George Wickham. Once I knew this, I insisted that we return home immediately, knowing that Mamma's nerves would be wearing everyone thin. Upon reaching Longbourn we learnt that Lydia and Wickham had not eloped (well not traditionally anyhow) they had not gone to Gretna Green, and it was believed that they were in London. By this point everyone was frantic with worry, Lydia was so foolish and something told me that Wickham's intentions could not be honourable; surely if they were he would have asked Papa's permission.

That fear was only heightened when rumours of his debts in Meryton began circulating, not just debts to the tradesmen, but gambling debts. Worse than that debts of honour! I can still recall Aunt Phillips' voice, "They say there's hardly a tradesman in town whose daughter hasn't been meddled with!"

"Oh sister! And now he's meddling with our dearest girl!" Mamma wailed pitifully, that was the moment I became certain that all hope for Lydia was truly lost; a man of no fortune could only want one thing from a girl such as my youngest sister. Indeed he took what he wanted and that was enough for him.

Whilst we were being shunned by Meryton society, Uncle Gardiner and Papa were in town searching for Lydia and as the months went by things steadily became worse. Mamma's health was beginning to fail. At first she had not missed a meal, but slowly her appetite began to decrease, then her weight, she hardly spoke and her good looks slowly began to depart. Papa was much the same; he would return to Longbourn occasionally, weary, drawn and lacking in humour. Mary's studies became, if possible even more studious, Jane lost her smile, I knew that the light in her eyes would never return not after this, and Mr Bingley's desertion of her. Kitty had always been sickly, but surprisingly she became a lifeline, faced with the realties of Lydia's actions she became more serious, more mature. Kitty helped me support the family through it all. She flourished without the influence of Lydia.

Kitty and I took care of Mamma and ran the household, Jane was invited to London by Aunt Gardiner after we informed her of Jane's situation, and it seemed the best thing to do. It relieved our burden slightly, but only for a while, as not long after we began to feel like terribly selfish sisters'.

In February Mamma passed away, quietly, it was so out of her character that it made her passing all the more poignant for us.

Father returned home again in mid May looking even more despondent than before, he tried to lock himself away in his library but Kitty and I insisted that we spoke with him. We were well aware that being alone was not any good. He began berating himself for being a bad father; I started to cry at that, it was Kitty that comforted both of us. She rose from her seat and kissed our father's brow exclaiming that he was not a bad father. "You are a good girl Kitty, but I fear you shall never be a sensible young lady if you fail to see your father's failings!" The three of us laughed, but the sound of approaching hoof beats stopped us short. An express had arrived.

Unsealing the letter, Papa read quietly to himself whilst Kitty and I eagerly awaited the news, watching as he read it was clear the news was not good. He turned deathly white and eventually dropped the letter. "What is it Papa?" Kitty asked urgently, there was no response at all; it was as if he couldn't hear a word that was being said to him. Picking up the letter I read it aloud to everyone:

Gracechurch Street, London, May 12th 1813

My Dear Brother,

At last I am able to send tidings of my niece. The news I fear is very poor, and will undoubtedly shock you exceedingly. There is no gentle way to break the news. Mrs Gardiner suggested that we search the poor houses, as you are aware and my search began yesterday upon your departure. Two were visited to no avail. Neither of the superintendents had heard of or seen a girl matching the description or the name of Lydia Bennet.

Disheartened I began to walk away when a young girl, barely a child stopped me, her name she told me was Bessie, not sure what quite to make of her, I did however inquire of her business with me. She only asked that I follow her. I was lead down a back alleyway and into a house. By the fire was a basket with a baby. She informed me the child was Lydia's natural daughter.

Not inclined to believe her I began to turn away, she comprehended my motivation and stopped me for an instant, saying that I must believe her. I inquired after Lydia again, Miss Bessie once more insisted the baby was Lydia's but refused to tell me of Lydia's whereabouts. Eventually I was able to withdraw the information that my niece, and I am sorry to inform you of this, is dead. Miss Bessie handed me a note from Lydia explaining the circumstances, I will not trouble you with the details, however, arrangements need to be made for your granddaughter, Rachel.

While I understand that you have just returned from town, your presence is required here once more to deal with certain matters, we shall expect you soon. Jane is most upset but sends you her love, she refuses to see the baby.

Yours &c Edw. Gardiner

The letter from Uncle Gardiner was not thoroughly read at the time. Kitty and I were both to distracted by our father, his breathing was shallow, his face pale, and he was clutching his chest. We called for the butler to aid us, just as Papa collapsed onto the floor, he was carried upstairs and the doctor was summoned. All this was useless however, within minutes our dear Father had suffered heart failure and had died.

Mr Collins, the insufferable man was in Meryton within days, Charlotte, being slightly more sensitive had remained at Hunsford, although perhaps that was due to the fact that she was in the last stages of her confinement. He tried daily to condone us. Kitty refused to see him, and I confess to being anything but pleasant to him. Only Mary thought his motives pure. If Mamma had been there she would have said that he was "Viewing it all as his furnishings and property." I even found myself making that very same comment, however ridiculous it was.

Aunt and Uncle Gardiner arrived with Jane and the baby to support us and offered to take us all to town when we had to leave Longbourn. Mr Collins was generous enough to let us stay till he had cleared up his affairs with Lady Catherine and Charlotte had her child and was well enough to travel. Mary refused to come with us; she had decided that her life was unsatisfactory; instead she journeyed to France, and joined a convent! Undoubtedly it would suit her very well, from what little we have heard from her once since she left England, it does seem to be the case. Kitty distressed by the news of her favourite sister's death, and under Mary's guidance she seemed to find solace in the church. Though not in the same was as Mary, Kitty it seemed found comfort in our minister's nephew, Mr Jonathan Thursfield. They announced that they planned to be married as soon as our deep mourning was over, and he had taken his orders.

After Kitty and Mr Thursfield married they removed to his new living and rectory, in Somerset, with Rachel, who Kitty adores. Jane agreed, to go with them, not knowing what else to do now that our parents were both dead, there was nothing left for her to do it seemed. While I refused to sit pretty, so to speak, and live off the charity of relatives. Thus I decided to take up a governess' position.

Mrs Turner contacted me after I had Uncle Gardiner place an advertisement in the paper. Charlotte said she would write to Lady Catherine DeBourgh when I informed her of my plans, but I did not think I could face it. I could not face Mr Collin's either, she offered to let me stay with her at Longbourn and help her take care of the baby. She could not stand the thought of me working as a governess. To be perfectly honest, working as a governess is not my idea of fun either, and certainly not in the city, but I am earning a living. I have food and a home, what more could I want?

There are things I know I should probably regret now, like refusing to marry my cousin Mr Collins, perhaps we would not be in such a disastrous state. My sisters and I would all have a home and although Lydia would still undoubtedly have gone to Brighton. Or even if I had married Mr Darcy, although I shudder at the very notion, Lydia could not have gone to Brighton then. And trusting Mr Wickham, why did he seem so trust worthy?

"Excuse me Miss…" A quite voice at the door way whispered. I looked up to see a girl around my age, her hair was flaming red and her eyes vivid green and despite her freckly skin, altogether she was very pretty.

"Yes?"

"Mrs Turner sent me upstairs Miss to see if you required any luncheon, since you have been travelling and the like." I grinned again at the housekeepers determined pampering.

"No, no it is perfectly alright. I do not require anything, thank you erm…"

"Elsie ma'am." Said the maid bobbing a quick curtsey.

"Thank you Elsie, I am Elizabeth Bennet."

"Thank you Miss Bennet. Mrs Turner says that I'm to unpack your belongings for you, is that to your approval ma'am?"

"Yes, yes, would you like some help."

"No, I mean I don't mind ma'am." She replied nervously, as if unsure I should be doing the servants work, where as I was uncertain that I could make use of the servants like a family member.

Elsie was a very pleasant girl, she was smart and quickly understood any instructions I gave her, and she was in possession of a quick wit as well. She was able to mime Mrs Turner exactly; I thought I would burst from laughing. She gossiped about the other maids, though it was never out of spite. She told me about Alice, her sister, "And she's such a flirt ma'am like I never did see afore, she's set her cap at Joseph, but she don't know…" She stopped, blushing. Not liking to pry I simply raised my eyebrow, for I did not wish to upset her when it seemed we were becoming such good friends, as I understood it servants were not exactly welcoming to those such as myself, somewhere between the family and the hirelings although as I saw it since I was receiving a wage I was one of them too. By two o'clock our work was finished, my bookshelves were lined with books Mr Collins had permitted me to take from Longbourn, for you know he never read novels! Sheet music was piled on top of the Spinet and gowns were hung away. Elsie bobbed a quick curtsey and said she would inform the housekeeper we were done. Suddenly I felt extremely tired and I lay back on my bed, before I knew it my eyes closed and I had fell asleep.

At just past three I was woken by a faint tapping on my door, after checking my appearance in the mirror of my dressing table, and quickly re-arranging a few curls, I opened the door, "Begging your pardon Miss Bennet, but I thought you should like me to introduce you to the children now, since it is very near their tea time, would that be to your liking ma'am?"

"Very much so, I thank you." I replied as I, followed my elderly companion out of the room and along the corridor at a relatively slow pace.

"I fear they've been quite troublesome to Mrs Chambers and Martha today, what with all the excitement." I raised my eyebrow again; surely they could not be in such raptures because of my presence? Seeing my querying expression she continued, "The master and mistress return from their grand tour of the continent tomorrow, they've been gone a full year."

"The continent, how lovely that must have been." I expressed that one thought, but not my true opinion of absent parents who leave their children for a year or more to pursue their own pleasures, and leaving their children to the care of just the household staff, "Then the children have been quite alone, I can imagine they must be enthused by their return."

"Oh no Miss Bennet, not quite alone for the master's sister has been here most of the time, but she has gone away for the month as well."

Any more conversation we might have had ceased as Mrs Turner opened the door to the day nursery. The room was large and very comfortably furnished, with books, dolls, tea sets, toy soldiers, a Noah's Ark, a baby house, and hobby horses. There was a sharp looking old woman was dosing in a chair by the window and a young nursemaid tidying up. The three children were quietly seated on the floor, the two girls involved in dressing their dolls and the little boy with his fortress. "Cupid is coming." Began the eldest girl.

"How is he coming?"

"He's skipping,"

"He's striding,"

"He's stomping," Added the boy joining in.

"He's strolling,"

"He's singing,"

"No Roberta, he can't have come singing."

"Why not?"

"Because singing isn't a way of moving silly."

"But it ends with an 'ing'!" Little Roberta argued, then turned, I presume to ask one of the elders if it counted, it was then she noticed myself and Mrs Turner standing in the door way and gasped, drawing her sisters attention as well. The eldest quickly rose to her feet and smoothed out her skirts then instructed her brother and sister to stand as well. Roberta ran forward to Mrs Turner, "Can Cupid come singing, Mrs Turner, can he?"

"Why yes I do believe he can." She smiled indulgently at the little child, "Now children," she began, "This is your new governess, Miss Bennet. Miss Bennet, this is Miss Priscilla Sutton, Miss Roberta Sutton and Master Thomas Sutton." I curtsied to them all.

"It's a pleasure to meet you Miss Bennet." They chorused as Priscilla dropped an elegant curtsey. Roberta wobbled slightly while attempting to curtsey and Thomas made an attempt to bow but it was more of a bob. The noise awoke the nanny snoozing and she and the nursemaid made their way over. I was introduced to Mrs Chambers, she was a tall woman and reminded me overall of a red hot poker, her very demeanour taught me instantly who ruled the roost in this nursery, if I had been younger I may have trembled but I knew how to hold my ground with people more powerful than myself, Lady Catherine DeBourgh being a prime example. Martha, a young girl of no more than perhaps sixteen, was a complete contrast to Mrs Chambers, she reminded me of a mouse, with straw coloured hair and dull brown eyes, little and plump.

While I was absorbed in my own analysis, the children were gazing at me curiously. "Miss Bennet's pretty, isn't she?" Roberta asked whispering to her sister.

"Her dress is a very ugly colour!" Declared Priscilla, smoothing out her pristine white frock once more, I glanced down at my grey muslin, it was an ugly dark shade, but suitable for mourning clothes.

"Miss Bennet," I felt a tugging at my hand and looked down at little Thomas, "Will you play soldiers with me?" I was more than pleased by this suggestion, having no brothers we had not had a set but I remembered playing it with Charlotte's younger brothers.

"I would love to Thomas." I consented.

"However, Master Tom," Here Mrs Chambers cut in, "It is very near your tea time, I suggest you and your sisters go and wash your hands, Martha, go and see that they do so properly please. Miss Bennet, shall you stay for tea?" Again I replied in the affirmative.

I stayed in the nursery over tea, followed by tonic, and played a quick game of soldiers with Thomas, before the girls commandeered my time to help them re arrange the furniture in the baby house's drawing room; it was surprising how much time that task required. At five o'clock dinner was served. Thomas at this point had a tantrum and refused to eat his boiled fish and boiled potato. He only quieted down when Mrs Chambers ordered Martha to fetch laudanum. By half past six the three children were tucked up into bed.

Upon returning to my own chamber I sank back down on the sofa and contemplated going back to sleep. My head was starting to pound, I had not though children could be so troublesome, if it had not been for Thomas's fit of temper I should have been quite fine. Instead I found myself rubbing my throbbing temples and sending down a note to ask for my own dinner on a tray that evening. Elsie brought my tray up for me, with a cold compress inquiring after my health. I assured her that I would be quite well after a good nights sleep and regretted having had a chance to come below stairs, she said that it was quite unfortunate as all the other girls had looked forward to meeting me as well. When she left me she offered to come up the next morning to help me dress, "Mrs Turner said it'd be helpful to ya." She added quietly, indeed it would be most helpful, Jane or one of our maids had always helped me dress before now and I was certain that if I was to meet the Mr and Mrs Sutton I would need to appear well turned out, so as not to give a bad impression to my new employers.

Although I had never been of a frivolous nature, the following morning I spent an abnormal amount of time deciding what I should wear. Discontented with the black bombazines and crapes, now trimmed with lighter colours; or the muslins and batiste in greys, mauves, violets, purples, pansies, doves and heliotropes, Miss Priss's words from yesterday rang in my head "Her dress is an ugly colour." Combined with my desire to make a good impression I inevitably found my eyes wandering to the pastels, creams and whites which I knew became me far better. With a sigh of dissatisfaction plucked grey muslin trimmed with lilac and Elsie arranged my wayward curls, taming them with matching lilac ribbons weaving in and out. The servants had all breakfasted by the time I made my way downstairs and whilst I ate alone I was informed by Mrs Turner that the master and mistress would return by eleven o'clock. The children had a holiday today, I did wonder briefly why I had come at all until later in the week, but instead asked if it would be convenient if I had them assembled in the East sitting room at half past the hour.

At the designated time of Mr and Mrs Sutton's arrival I had the children wriggling excitedly in the sitting room, Mrs Chambers and Martha had been good enough to see that they were all impeccably dressed and spotlessly clean, but children are not supposed to stay clean and soon enough their excitement had prevented them from staying still Thomas had a smudge of dirt on the side of his nose, "Thomas come here and let me clean your nose." He obediently moved towards me but squirmed as I rubbed hard, before I had finished he had escaped my grasp and was dancing around excitedly once more. At this point I offered to play Taboo with them stating that the letter 'D' could not be used.

"An animal that has wings, Thomas?" Began Priscilla.

"A bird, Bobbie girl's clothes?"

"Spenser, Priscilla, a girl's toy?"

"A baby house, Thomas what do you do to music?"

"You sing! What do you do with crayons and paper, Priscilla?"

"Write, Bobbie people with pistols,"

"Fight, Miss Bennet, who's higher than an earl?"

"A…a Marquis." I grinned after nearly getting caught out by a six year old, "Tom, what do gardeners do?"

"Plant flowers, Bobbie, what animals bark?"

"Dogs!" She cried then suddenly groaned as the other two shouted triumphantly. Thomas began jumping again and pulled his sisters hair, the ribbon coming loose along with a few grips and all her hair came down. Now I confess I have never been very good with hair and after attempting unsuccessfully to return it to the original style, I began to braid the long, thick mousey coloured hair, my fingers working nimbly as the children began another round with the letter 'T' their voices raising with excitement.

Just at that moment I heard a voice, raised in anger, "That is enough madam!" I assumed that this was the master and mistress and quickly told the children to sit still and behave, Priscilla and Thomas, sitting on either side of me, with Bobbie on my lap my head bent over my work as I tried to make her presentable. Too late I heard the door open but did not look up. The other two rose from their seats and I felt Roberta straining to go and greet her parents as well.

A woman with a cold voice spoke, "Hello, my dears." Considering she had been gone a year she hardly sounded enthusiastic, "Oh no Thomas, desist from your activity it shall crease my new gown." Roberta was impatient for me to complete my task, but also I was determined to finish, just so I could see this woman.

"Oh yes, I do believe you have grown Priscilla, I'm not certain thought." She said weakly. Really, this woman called herself a mother! I placed the last grip into the plaited braided bun and tapped her head.

"There you are Bobbie, all done!" I declared as she kissed my cheek affectionately and hopped off my knee. I stood up ready to look at the new faces before me.

No! I stopped. It couldn't be? I looked at the face staring purposefully at me. What in the world is he doing here?