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"Bedroom Eyes"

Hallo~ Shiki hereee. I decided to take up sk-fan7's offer on creating a fanfiction for their contest. I decided to go with the "Point Of View" option and I created this. It's the scene after the night spent at the Funbari Onsen, when Ren and Yoh speak before departing. Although you only see two of them interacting in this scene, in both the anime and the manga, I decided to put my own little spin on it, because that's what Shiki does. Shiki can never just do something normally. He has to fuck with it.

Sooo, it's rated T just in case. I don't really think anything I write is rated K+. I'm always afraid that I slipped something in that's vaguely inappropriate or a curse word. xD

So, here ya go.

Yoh's POV

I saw him get up in the middle of the night. Our bodies were once curled and it was warm—so much warmer than anything I had ever felt. It reminded me of the closeness I craved of Anna. Perhaps craved wasn't the best word. Just the feeling of being near to someone, hearing the subtle beating of their heart, it was desirable, wasn't it? Wasn't that the goal of every person on earth, to eventually have that sort of companion? Maybe.

The four of us took up the space on the floor. Horohoro was taking up most of it, leaving Manta crushed beneath his leg while I huddled to the side where Ren lay. He was asleep, so he didn't mind. He couldn't mind it if he didn't know, right?

…Maybe that was selfish. After our fight I couldn't help the feeling that I had. It sounds corny or something but, I just wanted to give him a hug. That frown he wore was ever present. When he charged at me upon his horse, I could've sworn in the madness I saw tears inside of his eyes. Nothing Ren did was because he wanted to—it was because he had to. And him staying over this night was only proof that some part of him wanted to be free of that for a while. Sure he could cross his arms and give that pout and openly state how he didn't care to be around any of us, but in truth, his pride was just hanging in the way. Maybe he was afraid of looking desperate, or too eager. Maybe if I could just scoot a bit closer to him, maybe take those feelings away, I could—

Ren stirred and he got up immediately. He seemed slightly alarmed and he walked from his position on the floor to the opposite side of the room. I was frozen. Had I made him upset by moving close to him? Did my breath on his neck startle him? So many scenarios played over in my mind, and I wanted to glance over my shoulder to see what he was doing but I was far too afraid of him seeing me awake. He hadn't walked toward the door, so he wasn't leaving. Maybe he was and he was merely taking his time to pack his things up.

As I waited and I pretended to be deep in sleep, I soon found myself drifting off unintentionally. I was shaken awake by the eventual sound of footsteps leading toward the door. They sounded as if they were trying to keep themselves silent. My eyes cracked open half-mast, spotting the fully clothed Tao on his way out.

No!

My thoughts raced and I jumped off of the ground with the intention of running after him. That's when it dawned on me that I didn't want everyone in the house to wake up. My head slanted back over my shoulder taking notice of Horohoro and Manta. Anna was in another room with the girls. I'd have to be really quiet about this.

Almost as if I were in a movie, like Mission Impossible, I sneakily began to tip-toe throughout my home, trailing after Ren who was likely leading himself toward the front door. I would've hummed the theme to myself if I wasn't too busy trying to not be seen or heard. This would've been the worst possible time for Amidamaru to appear, so it was a good thing he didn't.

I was much slower than I should have been, it seems. When I reached the outside, Ren was in the process of mounting his horse. That overbearing cape two sizes too big for his frame clung to him like a curse. His back was to me as he did so. Hakuoh made a subtle snort. I gingerly set myself down on the steps and observed. Was he really going to leave without saying a single word? No, I couldn't let him do that.

"Ren, you're leaving too?"

As soon as the words left my mouth, I could visibly see the way that his body stiffened up. Surprised at hearing me? Likely, since he thought that I was asleep. I probably should have been, but I just couldn't let him leave like that. For once, after all of the spats we had, it was good to see him smile a bit. I really couldn't lie. Seeing Ren smile was like seeing light for the first time. It was so pure, like there was something lying beneath that exterior. I wanted it for myself.

"You're such a party pooper. At least stay for another night," I said with a gentle laugh, hoping that maybe I'd get that smile out of him again.

"Heh, how long are you going to keep playing nice to me?" spoke Ren, still flashing his back to me. Luckily he couldn't see me, since I actually had begun to frown just slightly. I didn't really want him to know. Did Ren think that I was acting? Had anyone really shown true kindness to him before? Knowing his attitude and the way that he treated people, probably not. Truth be told, I didn't know why I insisted on being kind to him either. He tried to kill me and steal my spirit before! And yet there I was, inviting him to my home like nothing had even happened.

"I only came last night out of respect. I do not have as much free time as you."

I my eyes squinted slightly, suspecting that he had plenty of free time. Because that's the reason why I invited him—he was alone. I thought that maybe… I could fix that.

"You… are going to return to China, right?" I inquired, knowing that the only other possible thing he had to do was to visit with his family. Considering how our battle ended up, I wasn't all that certain that they'd be pleased with him. Still, his family was all Ren had, right? Might as well stay with them for as long as you can.

I stood back up on my feet, brushing my legs off as I did so, my dark eyes making friends with the earth as I smiled sadly. "As I expected, you are also taking into consideration those words by Goldva. No longer able to return,' wasn't it? Even I am unable to tell this to Anna."

"…There is still one more period of testing for us. No matter what it is, an unclear attitude towards it will get you nowhere." My head twitched back up from its position when Ren spoke up. He always had that philosophy it seemed. Apparently laughing in the heat of battle and being 'friends' with your spirit got you nowhere as well. Though, I wasn't going to use that against Ren. It wasn't every day that someone transformed from trying to kill you into tolerating you. Had it gained a different meaning now? "…Therefore I have to bid farewell to my family—to confirm the goal I lost when I battled you… and to find out what I really should be doing."

I suddenly paused. The goal he had lost? I wasn't always clear on what Ren's dream for becoming Shaman King was. Other than the fact that I knew he had to do it to please his family, I wasn't keen on it. Perhaps Ren mentioned it once or twice when I wasn't paying attention. I blotted out many of the unkind things he said from my memory if only to remember that there was something else. …Still, the fact that I had killed his dream. My heart sank.

"…Ren."

"Hey… you don't need to worry for me. At least, I still have one other goal in mind."

Had Ren been able to tell by my voice that I was bothered by this? He seemed to immediately offer something that would appease that thought by saying that he had something else in mind. Of course, I was eager to know.

"Goal?"

There was that pause, and during it, I realized that I hated Ren not looking at me. I didn't like talking to someone and not being able to see their face. Ren was facing away from me still, his back hunched slightly almost in mock defeat. I couldn't see his expressions or try to tell what he was thinking from them. It was like talking to someone on the telephone. I didn't like it, but I waited.

"Yoh… you're the only person who has ever beaten me," he spoke almost as if humbled by the words coming out of his mouth. I didn't know what to say or do in that moment. I knew that I had damaged portions of Ren's pride by beating him, but I wasn't aware it was on that kind of scale. Heh, it figured though that someone like Ren didn't lose often. He was a really good shaman.

I almost felt bad for Ren, if only for a moment, until he knocked his foot against the side of his horse, and it moved to the left, so he could turn his head to meet with mine. And that smile that he wore, nearly made my heart melt.

"So, I say one day I shall defeat you, using a power stronger than yours!"

I couldn't even speak. I almost felt… unworthy for someone to waste their dream on. Was I really so important that Ren's new goal in life was to eventually face me again and win? It was definitely related in part to his pride. He couldn't live knowing that someone had got the better of him. Though… the smile on his face betrayed him. It was so reminiscent of friendship, I had almost begun to grin. By the time our conversation ended, I was practically beaming.

"We shall meet again in battle… until then, take care!"

Take care. We really had come a long way from where we started, huh? One day, I knew that I'd see him again, and it wouldn't be just in battle. I would see him again, and maybe then I'd be able to help him a bit more, one at a time. He held up a lot of hurt, and even in that smile, I could see it. Ren wasn't whole, but he was getting there. And nothing else in the world made me happier.

"You too!"

That smirk of his was going to be imprinted in the back of my mind for much longer than it should have been.

Ren's POV

When I woke up, I felt something I had never felt before. My eyes opened slowly, gradually. I was laying on my back but my right side was much warmer than the rest of me. I assumed that was the side with the blanket. However, that was far from the truth. Upon proper inspection, it could be found that one Asakura Yoh had seemingly… snuggled his way up to my side like a child. That was such a negative way to put it, as if I were putting Yoh beneath me with that remark, but in truth… it was quite brave. Didn't he think I would wake up and smack him for it? Was there no fear in his heart at the thought of it? I honestly could not believe it at first but the longer I lay there, the less it bothered me.

It was… dare I say it, nice? My throat swallowed saliva roughly. It was. His hands had found themselves against my side and chest. His head was using my shoulder as a cushion. His knees were coiled against mine. We were practically being shoved off of the floor itself considering how Horohoro was taking up all of the room.

Yoh's breath was warm upon the base of my neck. Confusion buckled my heart and I couldn't stand it any longer. I got up. I left Yoh where he lay on the floor as my feet traversed the cold wood paneling, headed toward the light. The only light inside of the room was the window. The view of the moon outside was so vibrant and full. With enough maneuvering, I was able to seat myself comfortably onto the sill, one leg propped up with my spine pressed against the frame.

What was going on? Why was my entire world being turned around and dropped on its head? What about all the stories I had been told growing up? Most children got fairy tales and bedtime stories. I was told of curses and nightmares—the things of mankind. I was told the world was harsh and that human were cruel. Me being a human myself and my parents as no exception despite shamanic talent, I hated them all. I hated myself. Why then? Why would someone I tried so hard to push away just cling to me like that?

I sighed out. Maybe Yoh was just doing it in his sleep and didn't know it. I could have easily snuggled him back and blamed it on the comfort of the moment.

No! Stop thinking that way, Ren! I scolded myself and cringed with my heart crying. Humans were vile. Humans were disgusting. Polluting the world—my father was polluting my heart. What had Yoh done to me? What had he done to poison me?

I looked at him. My golden irises fixated themselves upon his sleeping form. It took a few moments, but it set in. It dug in deep like a sharp pain but it felt good. Everything I had built my life on was wrong, but it felt good. Yoh… was not unkind. No one I had spoken with tonight was unkind. It was all such a fantasy in my mind, the thought that these demons existed. It was all just a lie. I couldn't help but leave the ghost of a smile searing across my lips. It was done. Living this life was done. It was time to go home now with my new found knowledge. It was time to free myself from the bondage I was held captive inside.

The moonlight was my only guide as I dressed myself. Out of those robes that Yoh had provided for me and into the garb I wore when I came. It almost felt like I was slipping on a skin—the skin of the Tao Ren that died tonight. I would once again don that cape of sorrow and the clothes that assisted me in killing thousands. The clothes had been cleaned, but it felt so dirty. This wasn't who I was anymore. I shoved my toes inside of my kung-fu flats and made a b-line for the door.

Everyone was sleeping. I made it out swiftly and silently. Hakuoh was right where I had left him outside. Undoing the rope that kept him bound, I wore a solemn expression. I would be home soon. So close to the end. I pulled Hakuoh to the side and eyed the gate that lingered before me. With a hop and a jerk of my leg, I mounted my horse. Goodbye to the world I had just entered. Perchance I'd see Yoh again some other time.

"Ren, you're leaving too?"

My back muscles were suddenly so heavy. My frame grew rigid at his voice. How did Yoh know where I was? When I left the room, he was asleep, wasn't he? Yoh was still in that curled up position beside the ground where I once occupied. Had the sounds of my body woken him up, or maybe he was always awake to begin with.

"You're such a party pooper. At least stay for another night," Yoh spoke with that laugh of his. It was so… right. I couldn't think of another word to describe it. It wasn't cute. No, I wouldn't call another man's laugh cute. That's just absurd. …But it was right.

Yoh could be so childish sometimes. I could never understand where that fountain of youth sprouted from? And yet, in every way that he was immature, it spoke volumes about his maturity. A mature person understood that while not everyone in life is a bad person, some people, it was just better to leave behind. Sometimes, it was just better to give up on someone, unless you want them to drag you down too. But Yoh was different. I was bad for him. Befriending me was absolutely stupid. I was so cruel to him, and like a child, he kept returning to me, and like an adult, caring and understanding, he silently forgave me for the things I couldn't change and for the ways that I acted.

I had to scoff. Who was this guy really? There's no way that all of this could be true.

"Heh, how long are you going to keep playing nice to me?"

I smiled, if only marginally, before that frown resurfaced. Maybe for a while longer, I could pretend that Yoh was really as he claimed he was—soft, naïve, open… warm.

"I only came last night out of respect. I do not have as much free time as you," I said with my fingers idly pinching the Hakuoh's reigns out of anxiety. Truth be told, I likely had more free time with Yoh. I filled it to the brim with Training I was convinced I needed, to defeat someone I was convinced was horrible. Perchance all of that meant nothing now?

"You… are going to return to China, right?"

I slowly worked my eyes to their left respectful corners, almost as if a failed attempt to deadpan in his direction. Truly, where on earth did the Asakura think I was going to go? My silence appeared to be enough for him to get the idea.

"As I expected, you are also taking into consideration those words by Goldva. 'No longer able to return,' wasn't it? Even I am unable to tell this to Anna," Yoh relayed as the audible sounds of him rising to his feet echoed about the area. I grew a bit nervous, although I wouldn't openly state it. I liked facing away from Yoh like this. That smile of his was more sinister than it let on. I knew my eyes were open doors and he could see right through them. The only way to keep my mind safe from those kindly prying optics was to not allow him access. I was already fairly certain that there was much about me that Yoh knew from mere observation. Needless to say, there was so much more awaiting the both of us, and I couldn't run into this blind. Yoh had defeated my past goal. I needed to reaffirm what I was fighting for.

"…There is still one more period of testing for us. No matter what it is, an unclear attitude towards it will get you nowhere," I explained. Yoh's mind was seldom unclear. He was that wind that didn't waver, whereas I was fully capable of faltering the way that I had. Maybe in this distance, I would become more like him.

But first… my family had to go.

"…Therefore I have to bid farewell to my family—to confirm the goal I lost when I battled you… and to find out what I really should be doing."

"…Ren."

Immediately after I'd spoken, Yoh responded with just that—my name. It felt so good coming out of his mouth. It was dripping with concern I'd never heard of from anyone else. I wanted him to say it again, but that would be selfish. There's no need for Yoh to waste his worry on me. After all, I'd come a long way tonight, hadn't I? It was refreshing. It was almost healthy to let a dead thing finally die. Still, he sounded so empty, like he'd broken me. It was quite the opposite. I responded with haste.

"Hey… you don't need to worry for me. At least, I still have one other goal in mind," I spoke with a more assuring tone than I'd ever donned before.

"Goal?" inquired the other.

I stopped, wondering if I really wanted to tread this way. That sickness that floated in his voice, as if he'd done something wrong—I wanted to fix it. I needed to elevate him, but that wasn't my style. That wasn't who I was. …Or, that wasn't who I was conditioned to be. I bit my lip and forced back my heart. It had leapt into my throat momentarily.

"Yoh… you're the only person who has ever beaten me," I spoke, allowing my pride to sink like a buoy, just long enough to get the point across before saving myself. I wanted to look at him this time, and show that there was nothing deeper than the words that I said. Yoh could stare through my eyes and see into my soul all he wanted with that amative smile of his. He could see down into my depths but he would find nothing more true. I made Hakuoh turn, and my resolve was firm. I couldn't feel my smile like I usually could. It blended in with the rest of my being.

"So, I say one day I shall defeat you, using a power stronger than yours!"

When I finally made eye contact with Asakura Yoh, the expression he gave warmed the deepest parts of my heart. No, I could not allow our past to be forgotten. This had nothing to do with being the Shaman King or bringing pride or honor to my family. This was a private score that I would one day settle. And maybe then, I would be okay with letting the rest of my walls down to him.

"We shall meet again in battle… until then, take care!"

Surely him, the one who deserved it most—for when I was most unlovable and unkind, he loved me, and he was kind.

"You too!"

I nearly jumped from my skin. I forced myself to turn back around just in time for my face to twist up with tears I didn't want to let out. My eyebrows were… knitted in utmost defeat while my mouth stretched with a trembling grin. That idiot.

How dare he touch my heart?

Anna's POV

I was sat in my room. The other girls were asleep. I couldn't shut my eyes for even a moment if I wanted to. I didn't like the day's progression. For Yoh to be so frivolous and take the company of that boy, with those gold eyes that penetrated and destroyed all that gave them a gaze. I couldn't see the appeal in having him as a friend. Perhaps Yoh just wanted to believe that there was an ounce of decency in him. Yoh wanted to save him. I scoffed at the thought. Yoh would see soon enough, it was pointless to stick his neck out for him. When would Ren return the favor? When would Ren be the one sticking himself out for Yoh? My dear husband was clearly on the receiving end of a load of bullshit.

In my relative upset, I navigated from my position in the room to where I could clearly see out of the crack in the door. Right across the hall was the boy's room. I didn't quite trust my instincts at this point. Maybe I was just riddled with jealousy. The looks that were passed between them, it made me sick. It made me... nostalgic in the worst sort of way. Yoh used to look at me in that way, back when I was that tortured soul in need of saving. Now what had happened? Did Yoh feel it was his duty to help every girl or boy that didn't quite fit in their skin enough?

I bit my lip with disquiet. I didn't want to admit to needing Yoh, but he'd been there for me through so much- the cruelty I showed, it was for the sake of his training. Not a single part of me would allow anything to come between Yoh and his dream- my dream- our dream. It was not an option, and getting close to this Tao Ren was in the way. Did Yoh really expect him to change? Had he forgotten the way he held his blade at his throat and threatened to take his life away?

Was he really worth it? I sucked my teeth with agitation, hearing quiet footsteps beyond the door. Really, Yoh? Was he worth it? All of the pain he put us both through, is he worth it?

The soft subtle creaks of a door were audible from where I sat. My head gently shifted allowing my eyes a more cultured view. I could make out the sight of Tao Ren leaving from the room. He was quick and quiet as he maneuvered through the halls. Judging by his attire, it appears as though he were leaving. My expression didn't change, although I felt a fire in my heart. Finally.

The moments passed by like dripping syrup until it was taken back. Another set of feet were eventually making their way down the hall, awarding my attention. I told myself that it wouldn't be Yoh. I told myself that he wouldn't care if Ren walked out but no matter what told myself, the truth was evident. I saw my boy leave the room and sneak out almost like a teenager trying to evade his parents. Where was he going?

Before I knew it, I had snuck out of the room as well, as the third one to the little line they had formed. Seeing Yoh descend down the stairs to follow Ren, I paused. To my right, there was movement outside of the window. I was able to identify it as Ren's horse lingering in front of the gates. So, Ren really was planning on going home. That eased my mind a bit, angry at the thought of some late night rendezvous. The soft shifting of the door beneath me was enough for me to know that Yoh had stepped out, but I wasn't sure I'd be able to hear the two of them from where I stood.

A few seconds passed, and Ren was about to leave when he paused. His back was turned to me and I couldn't see Yoh. He was probably too close to the wall of the house for me to see from the window. I didn't like this. I didn't like spying on Yoh. I didn't like that feeling in my gut that I felt when I saw the two of them. Why was it always there? Maybe the burning thought that I was too harsh, that Yoh would potentially grow tired- but none of that made sense when I looked at Ren. Cold, demeaning, aloof, sardonic, disgusting. Why? Why had things turned out this way?

I stepped away from the window, only being able to make out the sound of muffled voices and that didn't sit well with me. Slipping down the steps like a serpent, I kept my ears peeled for something that would make me wary. Maybe it was the wrong time. Maybe it was wishful thinking, or hearing only what I wanted to hear. But as I approached, the first thing to hit my ears was disconcerting.

"Even I am unable to tell this to Anna."

I made a scowl.

Unable to tell me what? I wanted to barge in so bad but I just stood and waited. There was an explanation to this. Oh, there was. There needed to be. So many bad things came to mind and my mouth quivered with every thought. My hands found themselves coiled tightly to themselves before I ultimately crossed my arms across my bosom.

"…There is still one more period of testing for us. No matter what it is, an unclear attitude towards it will get you nowhere."

I continued to stare from behind the door left ajar. The back of Yoh's body was clear to me, while Ren and his steed weren't so. Ultimately, it was hard to hear him from here, his voice was projecting in the wrong direction. When I could scarcely make out anything, I shuffled closer. I didn't want to be seen by the either of them. I'd have far more explaining to do than they would, naturally. Ren seemed to be lamenting on about something, as usual. Didn't he always have some deeply convoluted explanation of damn near everything?

"…Therefore I have to bid farewell to my family—to confirm the goal I lost when I battled you… and to find out what I really should be doing," the Tao spoke up once again. My eyes lost the deep rooted hate that once consumed them, if only for a moment. Something had changed in Ren, and that was obvious in the way that he spoke and in the things that he said. Facing Yoh, he had changed his goal, and she knew that from the beginning it was to become the Shaman King with no qualms toward killing anyone that stood in his way. Had they formed some sort of friendship that changed all of that? Really?

I wasn't so convinced, and the way that Yoh uttered his name following it made me feel sick to my stomach. Maybe it was true, just maybe, but maybe it was more than some sort of friendship gained. Is this what Ren did? Huh? During the day he was so cold and distant and now in front of Yoh in their loneliness, he was much more pleasant. It was strange, and it was almost like a lie. I had opened myself wide to Yoh, and he saved me, and he was mine and I was his- then what was this that was forming right before hme?

"Hey… you don't need to worry for me. At least, I still have one other goal in mind."

I wasn't listening to this anymore. Yoh could show all of the concern that he wanted. Ren could take it anyway that he pleased. My lips would be sealed. I knew where his love and affections lied at the end of the day. I knew them well.

Turning on my heel, I forced myself back up the steps with my hands clenching my arms tightly. I would not show sympathy toward him, and I would not allow myself to cry. Everything I'd done, I'd done for Yoh, and nothing would change that. That perfect fantasy in my head would come to pass. He would be the Shaman King- I would be his Shaman Queen, and we would do it- have an easy going life.

I would wait at the steps for him to climb up. When all was done, I'm the one who would sleep with him tonight.