A/n- Well I hope you guys like it tell me what you think about it through a review! I have an OC contest going for my story Kiss the Girl message me your OC and I will announce if you won or not, and also message me any story ideas you would like to see and I'll do the best to my abilities
I can love again… I tell myself this is true and will myself to believe to it… But I can never fully accept it. It isn't fair how I could grow to love another person in time, and it isn't fair how he never will, and if my plan goes accordingly to plan I will never get that chance. Not that I would ever let myself fall for anybody ever. It's always been Emmett there was not one person who could ever take his place in my heart. I just hoped he knew that after everything I put him through right to the very end.
I don't know why I chose to hurt him even though I knew our time was running out I just wanted him to feel as broken I felt. But that gave me no right to do what I did. I know that now and I will regret it for the rest of my life which shouldn't be much longer. Because as you should know a heart once broken can never heal even though I shattered my own… Emmett had nothing at all to so with it. But that look on his face… That look was the last breaking point my heart could take. Now I should start at the beginning but before that I must tell you I never ever had those kind of feelings for Edward, Emmett was the one that held my heart. But anyways here is the beginning of my tale even though it makes my heart ache to tell it but the tale… Now that was really his.
Three Years Ago
I was walking down the beach unaware of any of my surroundings and out of nowhere a Frisbee hit me in the head causing me to lose my balance and fall on my ass. I looked up about to cuss out whatever bonehead cause my fall. But my words caught in my throat as I saw him he was bigger than most this was true, but his eyes had a childlike twinkle to them. Oh those eyes could get him out of murder and I had a vague suspicion that he knew it cause' he used them whenever he was in trouble.
"Sorry miss didn't see you there." He gave a grin that could make the toughest girl go weak. He offered me his hands to help me up, and from that point on we we're inseparable we spent every minute of every second of everyday together. We became increasingly close he knew everything about me how i close myself off from people whenever they get past arm's length, and how I could help letting him through my armored heart. He told me about his dreams and aspirations he talked as if he only had that second to live, and that's why he wasted no time with me he knew I was the one and he felt it to be senseless to go through obstacles but if he would have had to he would have jumped through rings of fire. He showed all the signs I want to slap myself for not realizing them sooner.
Last Winter
"Emmy!" I whined we've been in a snowball fight for hours and I was soaked to the bone, but I refused to give up.
"Do you forfeit?" He called over
"Never!"
"Then Bella." He whined back "It ain't over. Well…"
"Well what?" I asked interested he knew how competitive I was and he was just as bad he wouldn't just give up so he defiantly spiked my interest and he knew it.
"Come here." He stated simply I looked at him like he was an escapee from and insane asylum or something.
"I won't hurt you now get you fine ass over here!" I sighed but hurried over there finally glad the war was over. He leaned down to kiss me and I stood on my tiptoes so he wouldn't have to go so far, but even with me on my tiptoes he still towered over me. So he just lifted me and hugged me.
"I love you Bells." He murmured into my neck
"I love you to you big goof now let's get inside I'm freezing." He chuckled as he put me down so we went to the door but as soon I got there he hit me with a snowball. I turned to see him grinning goofily
"I win." He said as he flung me over his shoulder.
This Spring
We we're sitting watching the sunset when Em pulled me close and breathed in my scent as if it were going to be the last time. Little did I know I was nearly spot on…
"Bells I have to tell you something." He whispered in the crook of my neck
"What is Em?" I asked leaning into him
"I'm sick."
"We can go get you some allergy medicine on the way home." I waved it off as nothing boy how wrong was I.
"No Bells I'm really sick." My heart stopped at this
"What do you mean?" I asked hopping he will pull out his goofy grin and say everything had been a joke so I could smack him but we could go back to the carefree people we we're just a second ago.
"I have leukemia Bells."
"How long have you known?" I asked him with despair evident in my voice.
"A little over three years…" He trailed off I did the math back and my heat broke a little.
"You've known the whole time and you didn't think that it would be necessary to tell me?" I said acidly even though I could hear it breaking even to my own ears.
"Everything was going fine so I didn't want to make you worry well everything was going alright until last month… I stopped responding to treatments." He said sadness laced through his voice I've never seen him so sad, but that didn't stop me. But if I had that remote from click I would pause that moment and just stare at it so I could see how much I really fucked up.
"Why in the fucking hell haven't you told me Emmett! We've been dating for 3 years and you didn't have the decency to tell me that you had leuk-" I couldn't say it this was to much I struggled not to let the tears spill over.
"I have to go… Clear my head for a little bit." I told him
"Bella?" He said sadly as he reached out for my arm trying to reason with me, but backed away dejectedly when I ripped my arm away from him. Oh how I wished I had stayed and told him we would get through this together but I couldn't I was so mad and hurt and I couldn't deal with it. I call my best friend Edward over cause I needed to talk to vent. Most of all I just needed someone. He was surprised when I called him I kind of cut off ever since I met Emmett. I didn't ditch my friends I still hung out with them every week but I didn't need them to talk about the important stuff. I had Emmett but now Emmett is the problem I had.
I explained the entire situation to him and he held me while I bawled every last tear that I had. But them one thing led to another and I sought a new form of comfort he wasn't sure but he abided to my wishes. See Edward could never say no to me. I knew he still loved me… That he always had. I knew this so I used it against him, and did I regret it. Not only did I have Emmett but he was finally starting to move on and I screwed it all up for him. I never loved Edward in case you forgot that little tidbit up there I just wanted to make Emmett hurt and this… This was the only thing I could come up with. I was a horrible person I know this, but I'm not here to get your sympathy in fact I wouldn't blame you if you hated me I sure knew I did. While me and Edward were in the middle of our… Excuse me my betrayal this was not Edwards's fault I just took his weakness and used it against him. Anyways while in the middle Emmett walked in and the look I was talking about earlier ya that look multiplied bout 50. He didn't do or say anything he just choked on a sob and turned to leave. Me being the horrid person I am just put it to the back of my mind and finished what I was doing. For I was above Emmett now he hurt me and now I hurt him now we were even. Right? Well no… I was wrong how stupid was I to believe I would be right. Emmett wouldn't talk to me he ignored my presence when I tried so hard to make it known. He always wore that absolutely broken expression. I would of preferred him to scream say he hated me but know I just know that I broke him, and I was a fucking monster for that.
2 weeks later he died… I never got to say goodbye or even I'm sorry and that's what I deserved fuck I deserved a hell of a lot more than that. But now I was tired of living my existence… My soul mate died broken because of me because the time he needed me the most I decided to be my most selfish when it should've been me in all that pain. All along Emmett never deserved this he was pure hearted and he would give you the clothes off his back. I was just a selfish bitch who let someone die with a broken heart without trying my hardest to make it better all because I was ashamed of myself, and I ruined my best friends life for the I don't know how many times now, and I finally broke him he won't speak to me. The last words he said to me were "Just don't ever have contact with me."
So now here I was in my bathroom with a knife wanting to most painful death possible. Why some of you may ask? It's as simple as this I deserve it. Now with all that being said I must go now. Hopefully I will see Emmett again. If I have to I will spend forever making it up to him, but as I said before a heart once broken can never heal.
A/n- I hope you liked it I just thought of this a little bit ago and thought. Hey why not make a oneshot. I'm sorry for the severely depressing tone but hopefully it's a beautiful depression? Well review and I'll love you forever. Also check out my other stories
Remember When- In Progress
Bella/Emmett
Sorry Will Never Be Enough- Oneshot
Bella/Rose
Forever Apart of Me- Oneshot
Bella/Rose
Kiss The Girl- In Progress
Bella/Rose
Tears to Shed- In Progress
Seth/OC