How the Kaiser Stole Christmas
It had to be done!
All the Digidestined down in Digidestinedville liked Christmas a lot,
But the Kaiser that lived just north of Digidestinedville did not.
He stood in his secret base hating the season
And hey, I'm not gonna be the one asking him for a reason.
It may be that his tinted shades were too tight,
Or maybe we Americans didn't dub his name right.
But whatever the reason, his shades or his name,
The Kaiser stood there thinking Christmas quite lame.
Why, for twenty-three episodes he'd put up with it now!
"I must stop Christmas from coming…but how?
I can't load their presents up onto a sleigh,
Except for Daisuke they'd notice right away!
But what if I hit them all on the head
Until they're like Wizardmon, sorta half-dead?
And then in a flash, yup, in a quick jiff
I'll take them and throw them off the nearest cliff!"
So into Digidestinedville the Kaiser did creep,
The poor Digidestined all fast asleep.
He walked quite quickly to a house on the right,
Hoping to bag a child that night.
But the Kaiser heard a soft cough from behind,
And turning on his heels he happened to find
Iori-chan Hida, a Digidestined so small.
Yes, Iori, the smallest Digidestined of all.
"You're Ken Ichijoji, the Emperor guy!"
He said looking our Kaiser friend straight in the eye.
"You're the one who made those awful Dark Rings!
Why in the world would you do such a thing?"
The Kaiser stood there, could think of no lies.
Soon Armadillomon appeared and "Digi-armor, energize!"
Now the Kaiser ran out the front door.
"I won't visit the new kids, fer sure!"
So he walked around the town for a while,
Passed a house on the left and entered with a smile.
There, sound asleep in her warm little bed,
Was a girl with bright pink hair on her head.
The Kaiser approached her without a sound,
But then checked to see if the plant was around.
Hearing linoleum scraping on roots,
He jumped out the window, almost losing his boots.
As he stood there in Mimi's yard he gave a shout,
The sun was rising, time had run out.
As the Kaiser high-tailed it he saw on a stair,
A handsome young man with bright golden hair.
"Well, well, well, just lookit that.
If I can't get Mimi, I'll take down Matt!"
A/N: I know, I was using Japanese names, but you can't exactly rhyme anything with "Yamato."
But then he saw, from the corner of his eye,
Gatomon, Hikari, and her brother Tai.
A/N: What do you want? I'm rhyming here!
There were too many kids, the Kaiser did find,
Too many, and too little time to make up his mind!
But as he was sitting there Ken saw the light:
Maybe beating up Digidestined just wasn't right.
So he went back to his base and built Kimeramon instead,
Was punched by Takeru, got sick in the head.
And now the Kaiser is officially gone,
To be replaced by Arachnemon.
And Mummymon too, a weird-looking creep.
My question is, where'd they get a Jeep?
All right, all right, this lost the Christmas scheme,
But as I'm typing, I'm putting up with the scream…
"No, no Dr. Seuss!" Nicki, it's okay!
Now go get to work on the story, TODAY!!!
Merry Holidays to each and every one of you,
Now be a good reader and freaking review!