So this is a quick drabble(?) that grew out of a five minute fiction challenge that made the rounds on tumblr last weekend. I'm not even sure what I'm doing because my mind is a mess of spoilers, speculation, and wishful thinking right now. Add in the fact that we're officially halfway through the season without any significant Richonne dialogue, and I am barely keeping it together, people. How much longer can we hold out? So here's a little bit of wishful thinking, a small moment after the events of episode three, but before any new drama occurs...
The sound of his boots meeting the plywood steps, and the sway of the new, hastily built watch point as he climbed up, alerted her to his presence. She didn't even turn her head to see who it was; then again, this was the third night in a row that he'd come to visit her on watch, so there was very little mystery around the identity of her visitor.
"People are going to start to talk with you always coming up here like this," she said as she looked out over the walls of their community.
"Let 'em…it's better than whatever else they've been sayin' about me."
She turned to look at him and was met with his profile as he looked out over the walls, the corner of his lip turned upward in a grin.
"So what's on your mind tonight?"
The first night's topic was wall fortification, and last night's was, of course, the quarry plan. She imagined the Wolves or the likely oncoming herd would be the topic tonight, as they were definitely on her mind among other things.
"Nothing specific...I guess I just wanted to see you if that's OK," he said with a self-conscious chuckle.
She looked over to meet his eyes for the first time since he'd joined her, and saw the expected weariness on his face, but also something else that she couldn't quite put her finger on. If she had to say, it'd be a sense of insecurity, or maybe she was just projecting.
"Of course it's OK. I could use the company, especially today."
It felt like a hundred years ago at this point, but it was only this morning that they'd embarked on their dress rehearsal gone terribly wrong and returned to a community that had been attacked without one of their closest friends. It was surreal that they found themselves with a quiet moment on a day like today; but they both knew well enough at this point that it was just that, a fleeting moment before the next catastrophe.
He gripped the wooden rail of the watch point with both hands and leaned forward, letting his shoulders relax somewhat as he looked out over the area beyond the walls as dusk began to fall, turning the green topped trees to a muddled grey.
"I really thought I'd lost everything today, Michonne."
The defeat in his confession and voice caused her to look over at him, but seeing him swipe at the corner of his glassy eyes with his thumb caused her to take a step closer to him, her shoulder grazing his as she watched him search for the words to explain himself.
"Not being able to reach Glenn on the walkie and thinking something had happened to you...then seeing that bottle of Judy's baby food, knowing that group had attacked our home, maybe gotten to the kids...I thought it was too late..."
"Me too," she said softly causing him to meet her eyes, her admittance of near defeat unsettling him since he always counted on her unwavering strength.
"Coming up on the gates not knowing what I was going to find...being without you...any of our people..."
He moved his hand over to cover hers where it rested on the rail, and she curled her fingers around his response, reciprocating the comfort and support he was giving her in that moment.
She looked down at their hands, blistered and bloodied, but still strong; and David's words ran through her mind. But if I could make it back, I'd want to say good-bye. Tell her...finding her in all this, that was everything. She had this moment and she knew how she needed to spend it. The thoughts and feelings were right there, ready to come out, but there was still something keeping her from sharing them. If today's events weren't reason enough to express her feelings, she couldn't imagine what would be.
She stayed silent, holding his hand, and looking forward as her mind raced. You brought me back, and finding you and your family made life worth living again. She swallowed nervously, suppressing the words that were threatening to come out. When I came up to our gates, I thought I had lost everything. Again. She swallowed once more, tightening her grip on his hand.
"I worry about everything, but never you. Never us not making it, but today..." He cut himself off as he watched her frown in reaction to his words. "And I know what you're going to say, there's no us and them, but-"
"There is," she interrupted. "There's an Us. I lost too many people out there today, and it hurts, but nowhere near what I felt at just the thought that I'd lost you, Carl, and Judith," she stopped herself short of adding and the others like she normally did. If she couldn't say everything today, this was the least she could do.
Rick looked at her thoughtfully, relieved to hear her siding with him. He wasn't trying to be cold towards the others; this was just his truth, one that he now knew she shared. One that he was happy to hear that she shared with him.
"Well, that's not gonna happen to us. We won't let it happen."
"No, we won't," she agreed, her voice soft, but certain.
"We won't," he repeated once more, strengthening his grip on her hand as they shyly broke their gaze and looked off to the distance keeping watch over their home.