So, I was listening to the new Snow Patrol CD, and realized just how much the songs could be used to describe the feelings in New Moon. So, I will attempt to do justice by the great SP and the awesome Stephenie Meyer. These will just be short glimpses into the points of view of others throughout the book, set to Snow Patrol songs…
I own none of the songs or characters that are mentioned throughout the story… well, here goes…
You're All I Have
Edward
I couldn't believe that I was actually going to do this. But I had to, even if it killed me. I had to do it, for Bella. My Bella.
She looked so peaceful in her sleep. I was going to have to break up with her tomorrow. I didn't want to, but what could I do? Wait for Jasper to try to take a bite out of her again? I knew he felt bad, as he should, but I couldn't put him or Bella through that. "Don't leave me, Edward. Please." Even when she was asleep, she was observant. It broke my heart. I thought it had long died, along with my body, but she brought out so much in me that I thought I had forgotten.
I didn't want to go. A small recess of my brain shouted at me- why are you doing this? You won't be hurting just yourself! And what will she do without you? She'll kill herself falling down the stairs! It's downright irresponsible of you to leave! Oh, how I wanted to listen to that part of my brain. It seemed so logical. Who was I to argue? But I knew better. No matter how much I wanted to stay, I couldn't. By leaving I would be showing everyone just how much I loved Bella, so much more than I loved myself.
I knew staying here tonight would make what I had to do so much harder, but I couldn't stay away. If I was going to have to leave her, I was going to memorize everything I could about her before I left. How peaceful she looked in her sleep, how she mumbled things in her sleep she would never say while she was conscious. I swear once I heard her say "Well, I hate you too, Lauren!" how many times I wished that she would have said that to her face. But now I won't be able to. I'll be gone.
After a while, the sun came up, and I knew it was time to leave. Before I jumped out her window, I gave her a kiss. She didn't wake, but she did mumble something. The only thing I heard was "Edward".
She was the best thing to have happened to me, I was the worst for her. She would be better off. I repeated my mantra the entire way home. I had to believe it, if I was going to be able to leave tomorrow. How I saw her tonight would be how I remembered her. That memory of her would be the only thing I'd have of her, my Bella, the only thing I have in this world.
She's all I have, and I'm letting her go…