WARNING: Major spoilers for Kuroshitsuji II.
Disclaimer: I am narrating one of the episodes. I do not own the Kuroshitsuji, the characters, the plot, the story, etc...
The pain sears up through my body. For every breath that passes through my lips it feels as if I was swallowing daggers instead. Every second, I felt more and more empty as I could see more blood pool from my stomach. My senses were already beginning to dull out - I couldn't even feel my body anymore. The night breeze, which was just seconds ago, soft and lulling, was now unbearably cold - biting and chilling my every bone. Thinking that it could somehow erase the pain, I gathered all of the strength I could to raise a hand and applied pressure to the wound. Clearly, my body protested to every movement. No matter - it was futile, of course. If my throat wasn't so dry and if my stomach didn't hurt this much, I would be laughing at my own foolishness.
The sight of blood wasn't new to me. But after I lifted my blood-stained hand from my wound, all the red and crimson seemed to eat away at my blue, blue eyes - as if it was blinding my vision.
The darkness was terrifying. I wouldn't let my drowsiness and this pain fool me - I couldn't make out any light from the full moon. It was terribly dark - I couldn't see that much. If I was in the mansion, I would definitely scream. Black continued enveloping me, and I felt that I was diminishing - as if I was fading away into nothing. And that if I screamed, no one would hear me. Forever lost, with no one to even see me drowning in this endless see of pain and oblivion. That fear chilled my bones even more. I passionately struggled to keep my eyes open, for I felt that if I closed them, I would forever be lost, and all alone...
I felt cold. I felt lonely. Everything seems so transparent and faraway and intangible. I want Claude right here, right now.
Yes, Claude...
...But where is he? Why isn't he here? Didn't he promise that he would stay forever by my side, no matter what? So, where did all those promises of his go?
Swallowing the pain, I shut my cerulean-blue eyes tight in order for a wail or a scream of pain not to escape from my lips. My breaths exploded into desperate pants and puffs as I saw a small shadow slowly lurking against the dark. I closed my heavy eyelids that seemed to weigh a ton, and opened them again, to check if I wasn't dreaming. The moment images began flooding its way to me again, I saw a grey wolf, its eyes shining with a crazy lust when it saw me and the bloody mess I made on the forest ground. Struggling to get away, I aimed for a blur of brown trunk against the blinding darkness - a tree. Not caring how I looked like right now, I began crawling painfully like a dirty worm, most of my elbows and hands doing the work since my stomach and my legs seemed to be numb and completely frozen. I could feel the beads of sweat forming on my pale, pale head as each step felt like thousands. The trail of blood I left was amazing. Spatters of pure red and crimson were vivid against the dirty path, and its color against the darkness I feared so much guided me, helping me to my path when my vision was already so painfully blurry.
Two more steps...
I panted and gasped for air, struggling to get to that tree no matter what. The pain was already unbearable, and that pain re-echoed as I continued moving. For every step I made, the pain continued amplifying, until I had noticed that I wasn't really moving anymore even if I felt like running in a marathon.
One more step...
I knew that if I pushed myself further at this, I would surely die. As I commanded my half-numbed body to move, a painful scream escaped my dry lips as I felt the wound spreading and more blood gushing below my body. The pain continued amplifying a zillion times, and I couldn't move anymore at all. I tried to focus and concentrate, but I was as still as a statue.
The wolf, growing hungrier and hungrier by seconds as he saw the trails of blood I was leaving as I crawled to that tree, slowly began to make its way toward the helpless, vulnerable me. Slightly terrified, I began to call out. Using my elbows and my arms to support my entire weight was already killing me, and it was the best I could do.
...Claude...Claude! Where...are...you?! ...Hurry up, Claude..! You told me...you would never leave me! Isn't that..what..you...promised?
My breaths began to turn violent and sharp as I struggled to take in more air - but I never seemed to get enough. The blood vomited out of my sore throat, making its exit through my mouth, the dirty crimson spilling like waterfalls and staining my clothes even more. My voice was raspy and dry - I wanted to stop screaming already. But deep inside, I still believed that if I just called out, Claude would come. Even just opening my mouth was already unbearably painful, yet I ignored it.
Even if there was no one to hear me, I propped my head up, legs down and immobilized, leaned on my hands and elbows to remain crawling, and returned to talking as I moved. If I just called out...I knew he would come...
Then show me those eyes..Claude! Not...those eyes...of the villagers..that looked at me as if...I was a pile of horseshit! Not...those eyes...of that disgusting old man...that shone when I was sprawled...vulnerable on...his dirty bed...Not those eyes...that looked at me as if I was...nothing but an animal...not those eyes...during that day...the way you looked...at me...like I was a maggot...show me... those eyes...those eyes...that burnt...those eyes...that...longed...for..me. Those...eyes...that...wanted nothing but to devour me...Claude...!
One more nudge of my elbows and I felt like they were clapped with hot irons all day long. When I finally reached the tree, I sat myself up, the process seeming to last for a hundred years. When it was finally finished, I felt as if I was dead already.
Claude...where are you?
I was brought back to my senses when the sharp glow of the wolf's eyes penetrated my own cerulean orbs. I suddenly looked at it, cerulean narrowing in envy. I was jealous of that wolf now, having such a delicious prey, vulnerable and all defenseless, before it. Being able to run and kill and stand up...unlike me, who's all helpless, leaning on a tree for support - laughable, pathetic.
So, this is it...I was so blind. In the end, I was being used by everyone...enjoying me when I'm right there...and leaving me when they're satisfied...I never believed...that Claude was, after all, like everyone...my feelings are just addling his taste. My passion ended up being nothing but a plaything to him. My outbursts were just being trifled at. Claude, who was...everything to me...
Claude...don...t d...en..y i..t-t...I n-nev..er...mean..t...a-a-an..y...t-t-thing to you, d-did..I?
Finally believing that this is my death, and Claude would never come, I closed my heavy eyelids as the wolf opened its mouth, baring its fangs, the saliva leaking with an uncontrollable lust for my blood. With a howl, it lunged for me.