Batman: The Final Punchline

by grimem17

This is a "what if" story in which the Joker is actually Batman's real father, and Joker makes his last stand in order to spread chaos, and of course; corrupt Batman so he can be just as evil as the Joker.

Batman: The Final Punch Line

By Eric McCann & Jacob McCurdy

Batman characters created by Bob Kane

Swirling images, filled with both color and pure darkness, we leave the theater on this cold, chilly night. We walk the streets, our shoes echoing their click-like sound on the pavement. We all had a smile on our faces, laughing with glee, unaware that I would almost never laugh again. Totally unaware that my life will change forever on this night. We escape a couple of shady figures into the mist-like ally way, where a strange feeling began to slowly blacken my heart and soul, torture my mind with such darkness it can only be described as the darkest night. A shadowy figure, no, make that two, emerge from the devouring darkness.

"You, how did you find us?" my mother asked, the figures did not answer, but the first figure chuckled darkly. He walked over and grabbed my mom's pearl necklace, a gun in hand, my father tried to stop him, but the figure shot down my mom. Then, he shot my father down like a dog. The shot echoed throughout the streets like a corrupted bell's toll. I was completely paralyzed; this will be one of the very last times I will be afraid. I could have sworn that in the moonlight, he looked like a homicidal, belligerent clown. It disturbed me beyond reason and logic, my innocence ripped away like tissue, my tears were unable to form. He smiled, and I could have sworn he said "We shall meet again, my son," and the figure turned and left into the swirling vortex of the darkness that clung to the night like a black goo.

I went on my knees, and then the vision swirled, I was at the mansion, playing with one of my best friends, and I fell through a dark hole. I was so afraid that I did not scream, and for what seemed like forever; I thought I was plummeting straight into Hell itself. I landed with a thud and thought, is the Devil going to smile at me; is that man who killed my parents the Devil himself? Then, a light fluttering off in the distance. Is that him? Is he here to finish me off? I thought to myself as I stood up and posed; braced for what I thought was my demise. In some ways, I did die in that hole, but the fluttering came closer and closer, like cloth swaying in the breeze. As it neared, I realized it was a bat, a giant bat.

My heart thudded and filled with fear, and then I saw him, the man who killed my parents, killed my childhood. The man who smiled like an insane, disturbed clown. I had an epiphany, to become something to fear, to bring criminals like the man who killed my parents to justice. To avenge the people who were mugged, murdered, conned, raped, harmed, and have broken any law that has been written down. To avenge my parents, to avenge my childhood, my innocence that was destroyed as easily as cracking an egg. I fell to my knees; the bat seemed to speak to me. Bruce, you must become the guardian of Gotham City, the avenger of your parents' death and all crimes that have been committed here. I nodded. You must become Gotham's champion, her knight in black armor; her protector and caretaker in the night. I nodded once more. You MUST NOT SINK TO THE LEVEL OF THOSE CRIMINALS: "THOU SHALT NOT KILL," 'tis a universal law that especially thee must follow, because thou will be thrice damned if you take a life; no matter how evil they are, DO NOT TAKE A LIFE BRUCE! I nodded once more. Don't just promise me, swear on thy soul, to thy parents, and most importantly; to thyself of what I have commanded of thee, Bruce. "I shall," I said darkly.

I wake up, in a cold sweat, the moonlight like pearls (my mother's pearls) on the floor. It was the dream again, as it always is. My promise, my birth into my new life. The birth of the Dark Knight, the birth of Batman. I rise from my bed like a ghost, with Alfred waiting just outside the door. "Good evening sir, I have made sure all chores and appointments have been made; including the one with Luscious Fox about your request of a better suit," said Alfred as I smiled and headed downstairs, "Thanks Alfred," and looked at the picture of my father, Thomas Wayne for a while. I haven't noticed it, but I didn't look or act like my father at all. I do act like my mother used to, bright and pretty much isolated from the world. But I did not get my looks from her, except for her eyes and her smile. That question always kind of bothered me sometimes, but I guess I will find out sooner or later. After all, I am one of the greatest detectives. Alfred was making my bed upstairs as he thought to himself, and flattened the sheets and blankets with care and great and effortless expertise that were second-nature to him. I placed my fingers on the edge of the frame and pulled until it came unhinged, and there, a red button was in the middle of the wall. I pushed it and the wall slid up and an elevator car was there. I climbed in and looked out towards the living room.

The doors hissed shut as my head started to swarm of memories, dreams and nightmares. My heart thudded with excitement, I love my job, I thought to myself as I smiled. The elevator car opened, and there the vast dark, damp and expansive bat cave lay before me. Home, sweet home, I thought to myself as I strode across the room to the Bat-computer. I quickly changed into the cold, dark and ominous other self. The Batman is more me than Bruce Wayne is. Which I find funny. The chamber opened, my faithful suit laying in wait for me, I sighed as I looked at it. Well, I guess this is the last night I use you, I thought to myself as I slipped it on, whatever was left of Bruce was melting into the suit, and out to replace him was Batman, the protector of Gotham, and feared enemy of any criminal big or small. They whisper my name in paranoia and fear, in respect. "I am Batman," I growled as I swung myself around to the Bat mobile to start the old girl up, and she roared into life, flames spouting out of the back like an angered dragon ready for revenge. I revved her up and blasted into the night, the faux wall sliding shut behind me as the inky-blackness covered the sky like a blanket.

To me, this was day, to me this was the early morning, the dawn, to me the moon fills me up with warmth and hope. The day on the other hand is cold and dark to me, the day bothers me as much as pitch blackness would bother everyone else. The Bat mobile purred as I rode it through the abandoned road, moving quickly into the cold and corrupt arms of Gotham, and I must try to save her before the criminals turn her heart into stone. My heart pounded as I headed into her streets, through her back-roads, her highways, which were clotted with violence and hatred. I parked the car in an alleyway where I armed the alarm and armor that coated it like a suit. It was just in case anyone got any sudden idiotic ideas to trash my car. The night was a little warm as the darkness seemed to engulf me as its own, and soon, I saw my symbol in the air, and pulled out my grappling-gun and shot it at the nearest rooftop. I zoomed upwards as the air rushed past my body.

When I arrived at the top, I unhooked the grapple gun from the edge as I looked into the distance. I went towards it as quickly as I could, being careful not to be seen on these rooftops. I finally reached my destination, the roof of the Gotham Police Department, where my old friend and companion in justice, Jim Gordon stood with a cigarette in his mouth. The smoke swirling up like snakes trying to devour each other; which they eventually did; but in an unusually violent way. I shook off the feeling of curiosity and a dark gnawing in the back of my mind, as if the smoke represented something dangerously important. It's a possibility, but for now, I must focus on what Gordon has to say, I thought to myself as he neared. "Batman, once again you answer our call, I thank you. Now, on to business," he said as I nodded. "We have a problem on our hands, well actually several, the Joker's been released from Arkham Asylum by Harley Quinn and God only knows what he's going to do next," he paused, taking another drag of his cigarette, once again the devouring snakes rose again, and once again, I thought it was something slightly important.

"But there's another problem about half-way across the city, Riddler is trying to break into the Town Hall, obviously trying to kidnap the mayor, but the problem is that he said he had a bomb strapped to a highway, and if we get close to him, or if we don't find the bomb in time, he'll blow it to bits," said the Commissioner as I nodded. "He gave us this riddle, and it might be a clue to which highway it is," he paused, another drag, but this time the smoke resembled two clouds; one that looked like the other, but it was slightly disfigured. The two clouds once again devoured each other like cannibals. What does that mean? I thought to myself as I asked, "What is the riddle?" "It says, 'If the way to Hell is paved with good intentions, then what is the way out of it paved with?'" he paused and looked up at me. "Well, anything?" he asked as I realized the answer. "Madness, its Arkham Asylum!" I replied as he smiled. He turned around, and I disappeared into the night like a ghost, he was not surprised I wasn't there anymore. I went back to the Bat mobile and sped towards Arkham as I smiled, I already knew that it wouldn't be that easy, more than likely another riddle lies in waiting for me at the bridge leading to Arkham. As I neared the bridge, a car sped past me as the familiar face of the Joker flashed in the window. I almost turned around, but I knew how to slow him down. I pressed a button and throwing stars flew out and popped Joker's tires and the car squealed to a halt. I drove past to the bridge, and there, as I suspected, was another riddle.

"You may have shot the rabbit but that's not the only thing I have in the hole, but as we speak, we are developing scientific potions," the riddle read. Now the only thign you would hide in a hole was an ace, and scientific potions is another word for chemicals, I thought to myself as I flash-backed to the moment the Red Hood fell into the vat of chemicals, turning him into the Joker forever. I jumped to my Bat mobile and set off, and I saw that the Joker had another car, he was laughing as usual, but he took wild turns as he turned away from Ace Chemicals. He has something up his sleeve, I thought to myself as I saw to my horror that the highway suddenly heaved upward, disconnecting Gotham from Ace Chemicals! I was too late, but at least I was close to the Town Hall, so maybe now was the time to end this. I sped until I reached near there and left my car, my annoyance building because I knew the Joker was up to something, and after I deal with Riddler, I'm going to find out what.

I jumped out of the Bat mobile and walked slowly towards the Town Hall and set up my environment analyzer that could see through walls, detect a person's heart-beat and condition, such as nervousness or unconsciousness. It can also detect whether or not a person is armed, and I saw there were goons guarding several key points in and around the Town Hall, as I suspected. The Riddler was in the mayor's office, the curved top of his cane around the mayor's throat. I had to do this quietly or else the Riddler will kill the mayor with nothing more than a little jerk with the cane. I crouched as I slowly moved towards a ventilation shaft and climbed into it. I crawled until I reached a room with three goons, but there were some higher vantage points in this room. I grabbed my grapple-gun and shot it at the catwalk, and I zoomed up without a sound. I stood there and waited in the shadows until one of them came close enough to take them out. My plan was to take them one by one and hide the body, because any single sign of my presence and Riddler will snap the mayor's neck like a twig.

A target soon became available, and I climbed on top of the rail and swooped down and kicked him to the ground. I then knocked him unconscious and dragged him towards the shadows. I then walked near where the other guard was patrolling and hid in the shadows until he walked right in front of me. I grabbed him, covering his mouth with my hand and incapacitated him as well. I zoomed back up to the rafters and then the third guard passed right under me, so I scooped him up and brought him to the rafters where I tied his ankle to the rafter beam, and incapacitated him, then pushed him off. He swung back and forth upside down as I glided to the floor as soundlessly as a falling feather. My heart thudded silently as I opened the door into a room with four goons, and they were all armed, which I found interesting. I zoomed up soundlessly into the rafters where I waited for one of them to stray away from the others. One was going into a corner, all alone, and his back was turned to me. This is far too easy, I thought to myself as I got a little worried.

It was never this easy for a reason. I swooped down and took him out, and then waited for one of the others to turn this corner. I grabbed another guard and knocked him out, and then I zoomed into the rafters again as the others became slightly frightened. This was the last room before the office, so I had to be extra careful. I swooped down and grabbed another guard and incapacitated him without a sweat, but the last guard was rounding the corner. I pulled out a Batarang and knocked the gun out of his hand as I charged at him and kicked him so far that he crashed into a wooden box. The impact left him unconscious and he may have amnesia after this. I then went to the rafters and saw a ventilation shaft that lead into the rear of the office, right behind the Riddler. I opened it and crawled as my paranoia and worry grew, it was only because this was too easy, plus the fact that the Joker was running around, free as a bird. I opened the other grate and crouched behind the Riddler but saw that the thing he was holding wasn't the mayor, it was some kind of robotic replica. I knew this was too easy for a reason, the real mayor was probably somewhere else, either in Joker's possession or the Riddler's, but I do know that obviously he is not here. I tried to take him down silently, but the Riddler turned around and smiled.

"Welcome, Batman, to the beginning of the end of both you and the world you know!" said the Riddler with a smile. "Where is the mayor, Riddler?" I asked angrily as he chuckled. "We knew that you would rather rescue the mayor than anything else!" he exclaimed as I almost smiled. "Who's we?" I asked as the Riddler frowned. "Doesn't matter now, because of your weakness to help others, you have single-handedly handed us the key to your destruction and the domination of the world!" bellowed the Riddler as he laughed. "In fact, if I were you, I'd let myself be ended here and now so you won't be witness to our full scale plan!" he suggested as I growled. "I will stop whatever you and your partner are planning!" I exclaimed as the Riddler laughed again. "Trust me when I say this, this will be your greatest challenge yet, oh protector of Gotham!" he boasted. Did I honestly doubt it? Only a little, because sometimes to every insane little thought there is a great sane truth buried in it. He swirled his cane in his hand as the robot dropped to the ground, "Enough talk, let's battle Batman!" he growled as he whipped the cane at me. I will say this, since the first time I've battled Riddler, he has been slowly getting better at fighting.

He swooped the curved part to try to trip me, but I dodged and launched a punch, but he blocked it with his cane. I began to launch a kick as he swung the cane on my other leg, and I went to the ground, but I sprang up and jumped behind him. He turned swiftly and whacked me in the hip with the cane as I kicked him in the head. He stumbled and fell to the floor, chuckling as he swung the cane and it hit my jaw. Pain exploded as I growled. I picked him up and threw him into the wall, and he was still smiling. He's been spending time with the Joker? I wondered as he whacked the cane on my neck, shoulder, thigh and ankle, almost causing me to fall. I caught my balance as I began to punch him almost relentlessly. He spat out blood as he chuckled.

"You and I both know you won't kill me," he whispered as I knocked him to the side. I then knocked him unconscious and hand-cuffed him and went outside to take care of the rest of the guards. Surprisingly, they were unarmed, but they did put up a good fight. Good fight for their standards, anyway. I still basically beat them pretty easily. I jumped into the Bat mobile and started the engine to look for the Joker, Fortunately, I threw a tracking device on the back of his car the second time I saw him. He was currently at the junk yard. I sped towards it as I began to wonder if he switched cars.

Knowing the Joker, he probably did, but better safe than sorry, I arrived at the junk yard to see the car cover with the green spray-paint I expected to see. The words said "Ha ha ha" were all over the car, it was even inside it and on the wheels. I went closer and scanned it for anything suspicious, but then I saw out of the corner of my eye, a whole swarm of goons on one side of the junk valley, all waiting for something. I subtly looked to the other side, and there another swarm of goons poised like the other side. I knew this was an ambush; I thought to myself as all of a sudden, I stepped back and the car exploded with a recording of Jokers laughter as Aces of Spades and Joker playing cards littered the floor, which was probably the signal to attack. And then the two swarms starting coming near me like a rushing tidal wave. I looked up to see and electromagnet and hooked on to it with my grapple-gun as I zoomed upwards. I climbed on top of it as the two sides converged, then they stopped, they were all confused.

"Wasn't the Bat supposed to be here?" asked one goon. But another said; "Oh, he's here, but he's hiding, probably somewhere nearby, setting up his own ambush," clever goon, I wonder if he was one of the goons I took down in the past, I wondered as the first goon asked, "What do we do?"

"Well, look around, keep your eyes peeled look where you wouldn't expect him to be, or else that's exactly where he'll get you;" he said as I smiled slightly. A veteran goon, interesting, I thought to myself as I adjusted myself to start looking for openings. "One last thing, don't you dare go anywhere alone, even if you have to relieve yourself, bring someone with-" I threw a Batarang at him because he was getting too annoying. I swooped down and starting beating up anyone I saw, switching form one man to the other as I incapacitated the veteran goon and continued fighting. I did a wheel kick and sent one goon flying into another and flipped over a goon that was behind me. I grabbed a gas pellet and threw it down, and I began taking them one by one until the smoke cleared. There were only five goons left. I threw a Batarang as one was about to pull out a gun. As soon as he was about to pull the trigger, the Batarang knocked the gun out of his hands. I charged and punched one goon to the ground and knocked him unconscious and threw another through a decaying table. The other three tried to surround me, but I sweep-kicked them all to the ground and incapacitated them one by one.

I went back to the veteran goon, unconscious and decided to hang him upside down from the electromagnetic crane I appeared from. Dawn was just slowly starting to rise from the darkness, so I hopped into my Bat mobile and drove away back to the cave. I shall save the hunt for Joker for another night. I hung up my suit and went to my room where I took a nap, spiraling into nightmares of what the Joker might be up to. I woke up, about two hours before my appointment with Luscious Fox, got dressed, I was excited about my new suit. I walked to the garage where I stared at my almost endless supply of cars, and I decided to take the Lamborghini, I was feeling like a speed demon today. I turned on the engine and it purred as I drove out the garage and onto the highway towards Wayne Tech. The soft hum of the car calmed me as my worries about the Joker continued to escalate nonetheless. When I reached the tower, I went across the lobby to the elevator and went to the basement.

The elevator dinged as I saw Fox standing there, smiling. I smiled back as he said, "Well, Mr. Wayne, I hope you are pleased with what we have come up with," "Don't worry, I will be," I said as we walked into a room where the suit was. It was in a glass case and it was as black as night; there were pieces of armor on the shoulders and various other parts of the suit. The places where they weren't armor looked as indestructible as a tank; and yet it looked as flexible as the finest cloth. "This suit has a cape that can mold into the suit so it isn't a hazard when you're not using it, and when you need it, it opens up like a parachute-like hang glider." He paused as he smiled. "It also has pieces of armor that connect to the suit, and the spots in between the pieces of armor are made of an indestructible polymer that is bullet-proof, penetration-proof, and fire proof." He said as I smiled. "Impressive," I said as Fox smiled once more. "Oh, but that isn't even the half of it. In between the armor and cloth, there are artificial limbs that can increase the weight you can carry in your arms and legs up to 500 pounds." He paused as he began to circle the chamber like a lion dancing with its rival.

"The suit is powered by a small, but powerful electromagnetic motor-generator with enough electricity to power every part of the suit." He paused as I stood there in curiosity. "How does this power source work?" I asked as Fox smiled. "There is a crank that is connected to the generator that powers the motor, and the motor moves the suit and moves the generator, generating more power; you only have to crank it once a night, about ten turns ought to do it, and it is self-sufficient," he said as I chuckled. "That's ingenious!" I exclaimed as Fox chuckled. "Whose idea was the battery?" I asked as Fox rose his hand, smiling. "Now, the cowl is something that will increase your ability to follow trails and assess situations and locate certain objectives," Fox started as he pointed to the cowl. "It has a lower part that slides down to act as a gas mask or a rebreather to survive in areas in which oxygen is unavailable," he continued as I smiled.

"The lenses of the eyes are two analyzing lenses that record evidence, it also has any kind of vision known to man." stated Fox as I nodded. "The lenses send information collected by them to the super-computer in the cowl, located mainly in the top part and some part of the left 'ear;'" he continued as I nodded again. "The right 'ear' has a built in COM link to pick up police frequencies and information from any allies you have, including me or anyone else who guides you," he stated as I smiled. "It also has a thermal and motion detector that tells you of whoever is behind you by their thermal-signature and the physical shape of the person behind you so you cannot be taken by surprise," said Fox as I smiled. "I don't want to be beaten in my own game," I replied as Fox chuckled. "The suit also has powerful shock resistors, just in case you fall down or you get into a fight with an exceptionally strong villain like Bane," replied Fox as I smiled. "I love it already, is it ready?" I asked Fox as he smiled. "If I were you, I would keep this in a very secret place, other than the place you store your other toys, and I wouldn't use it yet," warned Fox. "I know just the place for it," I said softly as the sound of gunfire echoed in my mind.

It was a little quiet and boring for his taste, but he'll fix it up later. He smiled menacingly as he turned to the man on his right, "You know, it almost seems like a crime to actually launch this scheme so soon," he said as he chuckled slightly. "But, boss, you said you've been planning this for years." said the man to his right. "Indeed, I have been, but this scheme is going to be the last one I make, more than likely." he replied as he chuckled a little louder. "What do you mean Mr. Jay?" asked Harley Quinn, standing on his left. His smile grew more wicked and evil. "Either Batman will pummel me or I laugh myself to death!" he replied as his maniacal laughter rang throughout the factory. "But what if Batman joins us, puddin'?" she asked, making Joker laugh even louder. "Darling, you and I both know he wouldn't dare, but that is also possible, the very idea of it!" he paused as he chuckled again.

"One half of the world would be laughing to death and the other half scared to death!" he exclaimed as his laughter exploded from his lips. "Oh, if only he had killed me sooner, I really didn't want it to come to this." he said as he looked up at the ceiling thoughtfully. "Why, I thought this was fun for you;" asked Harley as he smiled. "Yes, but he has ruined my plans for far too long, and it is time he learns what it's like to be in my footsteps,. he replied. "Don't you mean shoes?" asked Harley. I smiled, wait, there's only one way Batman could ever have enough mullah to pay for his bat-gadgets! He thought to himself. He smiled. "No, I mean footsteps." he said as he smiled at this new-found secret.

Yes, it all makes sense now, the hidden reason why we don't kill each other! He chuckled at the thought and he sighed. "What's so funny, boss?" asked the man on the right. "Life, my henchmen, life, to me, is hysterical!" he replied as he let loose laughter so loud that he thought his head might burst. On the table was a game of chess, and a knight was in danger of being captured by a pawn. "Yes, soon we shall both be in checkmate, my dear son;" the Joker whispered to himself as he stared at the pawn.

"Riddler, my dear friend, you are a great pawn." he said as he chuckled. He moved the king of the opposite side forward, as he moved his own king forward. "Soon, my great foe, my poor soon-to-be-helpless Dark Knight, we shall end this joke soon." he said as he smiled. This is was all a joke, and this scheme is the punch line, my possibly last punch line, he thought to himself as he giggled at the irony. And it's the funniest joke of all, and it's not mine! He thought to himself as anger begin to rise, but so did his chuckles. It was all deliciously funny. He stopped, and started to pace, and started packing up for the little raid tomorrow. Time to visit an old friend, he thought to himself as his eternal smile began to grow.

He grabbed his trusty gag-gun and placed it in his belt. Well, I guess this is it, he thought to himself as he was almost tempted to do it now. No, this plan is slightly time-sensitive, it needs time to sink in and bury itself in deep, he thought to himself as he began to get bored. He knew the perfect cure, he pulled out a plunger with a flashing map with a bunch of flashing dots that were randomly placed in the streets of Gotham. He smiled as he pushed the plunger and there was a slightly audible boom in the background. He smiled as he began to chuckle. The position the cars were in weren't so random at all; they just seemed random. He then pushed the red button that said "Ladies and gentlemen start your laughter!" and pushed on the plunger. There was a series of booms until there was a loud Vwooosh! that shook the windows in their frames.

The dots were supposed to look like a toothed-smile in the air, and there were two circles; which were actually circular buildings. So it should look like an evil smile from above; and the Joker was down on his knees; clutching his belly as he laughed and laughed until he was laughing when no sound came out. He gasped and then sat down in a chair, only to fall backwards in it and laugh a little more. "Wooo-eeee that was good!" he said as he swiped his forehead. "Boss, what the hell was that?" asked the henchman as Harley Quinn looked unsurprised. "That was Mr. Jay's way of blowing off steam and getting a good laugh, at the same time." she said as the henchman looked confused. "But he always laughs!" he exclaimed. "He also gets bored very easily;" she replied as the henchman started to look worried. "He thinks this is fun?" asked the henchman as Harley nodded.

"This is him just getting started, you should see how the rest of it goes, if Bat-breath doesn't get you first." she added as the henchman cringed. "I don't know what's worse, honestly, but as long as I don't go to jail, I'm fine," the henchman muttered to himself. "What was that?" asked the Joker, who was apparently done with his laughing fit. "Nothin' boss, just sayin' how much fun this was gonna be," replied the goon. Joker smiled evilly. "Yes, it is going to be rather amusing isn't it?" he asked as he inched closer and held the flower in his over coat between his thumb and forefinger. "Yeah, it is," Joker squeezed the flower and a smoking clear liquid zoomed out and burned his face. He screamed as he fell into a vat of poisonous chemicals, and he couldn't swim. He was either going to drown or be horribly poisoned after. Harley shook her head and asked, "Did you have to do that?" The Joker turned around and smiled. "No, but I wanted to do it;" he replied as he chuckled.

I almost didn't want to go, but I knew I had to. I haven't used my first cave in years. The second cave, the one under the mansion, that one is the one I use most often. I drove to the theater and walked into that dark alleyway. No matter how bright it was, it was darker than the deepest bowels of Hell. I frowned as I crouched and crawled into the hole in the wall of the building to the right. I crawled until I slipped into a metal room big enough for two people.

I then felt the room lurch as it began its descent to the bat cave below. I found this cave when I was looking for courage on the first night I decided to fight crime, about ten to fifteen years after my parents' death. I was dressed up in a ski-mask, black shirt, and an overcoat; with shurikens, spiked balls, handcuffs, and my martial arts expertise. I went there because I needed some encouragement, to see if my parents would approve. Obviously, they weren't going to say anything, but I did find something, I found a bat cave in the exact spot I was in, so I used my equipment to explore. I found a huge cave that was only slightly smaller than the one under the mansion. I decided that would be my headquarters; although I did not like going into it; because the memory burns like an eternal flame when I'm here. After a year of use, the pain was so unbearable I had to find a substitute, but of course, this was after I donned the Bat suit. I donned that about a month after that first serving of fresh justice. So, I moved some of the equipment from there to the cave under my mansion, where it shall become my nocturnal home. The cave underneath the alley, my first Bat cave, has become my storage Bat cave and my extreme emergency Bat cave.

I have another Bat cave in the grounds of Arkham Asylum just in case I need to do any special work or if I am trapped there. The elevator reached its destination as I heard the echoes of painful memories fill the cave with sorrow and emptiness as the metal doors screeched open. I walked until I reached the heart of the cave, where the out-dated super computer is. Across from it was a couple of glass cases to store extra suits, but they were all empty. I walked over to the super computer and inserted a flash drive to update it to be as sophisticated as the one under my mansion. I then brought the suit case that held my suit to the empty glass cases. I opened it up and brought out the parts one by one and placed it in the case, where it was to be worn by a mannequin. I stared at the suit in wonder and longing. I really wanted to try it out. But I knew that when I did need it, more than likely, it would be the last suit I'll wear. I then went back to the computer where the software was almost done being uploaded into it.

Once it was done, I turned it off and went to the spare Bat mobile. I inserted a different flash drive into the hard drive, even though it was technically better than the one I have under my mansion. Still, there are a couple things that could be added to it. I purposely made this one better just in case the other one was either destroyed or captured. I returned to the elevator as the dark nostalgia rose within me as the cold metallic elevator doors closed, and I waited in silence to be brought back to the surface. I climbed out of the small hole, and I walked to the exact spot where my parents were gunned down as my heart pounded and my mind swarmed with dark visions and my vow kept echoing in my head like a distorted bell's toll, along with the gun shot that changed me forever. I drove back to my mansion as the memories began to fade the further I was from that alley. Soon, I arrived as the sun began to die. I descended down into my Bat cave and threw my suit on and logged into my super-computer. Then, my insignia flashed across the screen, which meant that the Bat symbol is branding the night sky over Gotham P.D. I jumped into the Bat mobile and drove towards the Police department and grappled up to the roof tops to find Detective Bullock on the roof. This is going to be interesting, I thought as I neared the detective.

"We've gotta problem Batman, the commissioner and almost the entire police force is trapped within Arkham Asylum!" "Why did Gordon want to go there?" I asked the flustered detective. "We received a message from the Joker that he's releasing the inmates to wreak havoc upon Gotham, and when they arrived, the inmates were no-where to be found, but the whole complex is rigged with enough explosives to drill a hole into Hell!' exclaimed Bullock as he took a long drag from his cigar. "Why didn't you go?" I asked. "Someone has to watch the station," he replied defensively. I then leapt off the building and jumped into my Bat mobile and switched on the coming that connects me to Gordon. "Gordon?" I asked. "Batman, thank God, Joker has us trapped inside, and the worst part is that he has the mayor strapped to the main bomb, and he's hog-tied with the wires, and they're all the same color, so we could not risk cutting one without the whole thing exploding," said Gordon.

"Joker's going too far this time, how much time do you have left?" I asked "About twenty minutes, and I also heard that the Joker-" the rest of the sentence was drowned by a familiar laughter I came to know all too well. "Well isn't he the big party-pooper, going to tell you of the surprise, good thing I jammed your signal Batsy!" mocked the Joker as Batman growled. "What do you want, Joker?" I asked. "What I want is not important, it's what I'm going to do that you should be pondering," replied the Joker. There was a sudden shriek of static as the connection was lost. I scowled as I sped towards Arkham, engaging every boost I can think of, because I was well over twenty minutes away from Arkham Island. I finally arrived with ten minutes to spare, barely enough time to even get over the bridge and figure out which building they're in. All of a sudden, I saw a little red line that crossed the width of the bridge. I stomped on the brakes, but the inertia was far too great, and the wheels rolled over the red line.

It was quieter than anything I have ever known, the whole world poised as intensity filled the air. I hope that wasn't what I think it was, I thought to myself as a jack in the box sprung from the corner of my eyes, playing it's ominous song until, there was a sudden tremble in the earth in the middle of its demonic melody as the whole entire complex erupted upwards as Joker's laughter filled the air, which was soon drowned out by the huge explosion that shook the earth and sank my heart within the depths of my stomach.

"NOOOOOOO!" I cried as the shock wave rushed towards the bridge. I quickly spun the Bat mobile around, and drove as fast as I can, but the bridge was rising for an unknown boat, or perhaps, there was no boat. I flew over the immense gap and landed with a scratching thud on the street as I watched the explosion tear the bridge apart along with its shock wave. I shook my head, closing my eyes, wishing it were all just a bad dream, but to no avail. Tears ran down my masks as I grabbed my grapple gun and began my desperate attempt of finding a survivor. I searched every single crevice, under every piece of broken rubble, and all that was there was the dead. Eventually, I came upon the mayor and Gordon, both horrifically disfigured and dismembered because of the explosion. I looked over dead man's cliff and swooped down and tried to open the door, only to find it completely collapsed.

"No, this cannot be!" I cried as I climbed back up and swung over to my Bat mobile. I drove to the police department. "Bullock! Where are you?" "What's wrong Batman, feeling guilty, do you want to turn yourself in?" He asked mockingly. "What are you talking about?" I asked. Bullock tossed a tape up and down in his hand. "This tape shows you calling us, using Joker's voice, and it also shows you strapping our mayor to the bomb, and arming it." he replied as anger and murderous intentions showed in his face. "What are you talking about?" Bullock placed the tape into the VCR and it showed me, calling the station and using a voice-changer to make my voice sound like Joker's, and it showed me strapping the mayor to the bomb, and arming it. "Joker's framing me Bullock!" I bellowed as he pulled out his gun.

"No, it was you Bats, you've finally gone over the deep-end, you've gone and killed the man whole gave his life to defend and support you, and you killed the mayor of this fine city, and you will be served justice, Batman, once and for all," bellowed Bullock as I pulled out a Batarang and threw it at his hand and ran. "I will get you Batman, and I will see you rot in jail for what you have done!" I jumped into the Bat mobile and connected my cowl to the screen on my dash board. I recorded the tape so I can examine it and see if I can't clear my name. I must admit it was almost perfectly done except for one small detail, the mayor was saying something, but I couldn't quite hear what. I turned up the volume.

"Please, Joker, don't kill me!" I smiled, but I knew I was going to need more evidence, because Joker seemed to have fashioned a convincing Bat suit. I then saw a flaw in that too, the symbol upon his chest had something within the Bat. I jumped out of the Bat mobile and went into the Bat cave and zoomed into the image on my super-computer, and I realized that he had a smile within the Bat. Now why would the Joker place such clues that he'd know Bullock would over-look, but I would find? I asked myself as paranoia began to set in. I then heard something upstairs, something like a struggle within my mansion. Alfred! I thought to myself as I tore the suit off and left it there. I went up the elevator to find the Joker holding a knife to Alfred's neck. "I know you, you're the Joker," I said, trying not to let the urge to pommel him overwhelm me. "Hello, Bruce, or should I say, Batman?" he asked as shock went through my spine. "Yessir, I know exactly who you are, my arched rival, the Dark Knight, the Protector if Gotham," replied the Joker.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," I lied. "Don't dare play me for a fool boy! It occurred to me recently how much moohla it would take to own your wonderful collection of toys, and I realized that you had to be it," the Joker paused. "Billionaire play-boy in the day, dark avenger at night, face it, we both know this day would come soon," he replied as he chuckled. My anger was starting to boil as he chuckled. "You've made me proud to call you me enemy, and yet at the same time, you're like my one and only friend, but I'm afraid you've stopped me one too many times, this time, you will feel the sting of failure!" he shouted as he burst into laughter. He then pushed a button and I felt something strike the back of my head with explosive force as everything swirled into black. I then woke up outside my mansion, and then I watched in horror as it lurched upward and exploded from the bottom-up. No, no, no! My mind screamed. Next to me lay a note. "Dear Batman, A.K.A. Bruce Wayne, don't worry, your butler's not dead, yet. Face me tomorrow night within the walls of the Gotham Police Department. -Sincerely The Joker. P.S., I'd keep a low profile if I were you Batman, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I was then stood up and began my trek towards my last Bat cave, towards the alley where Batman was born.

Oh, this is too delicious! Thought the Joker as he giggled. "You're not serious, are you?" asked Bullock as the Joker smiled as he pointed as his watch, which had a button that said Jokerize on the side of it. "Yes, detective, I am," he replied as his laughter rang out through the Gotham Police Department. "Now, get me a camera and make sure it goes to every network on this whole entire planet!" ordered the Joker. "I'll see what I can do," said Bullock as he fiddled with the broadcasting cord under the desk. Then Harley Quinn grabbed a camera and aimed it on the Joker's face. "How do I look, Harley?" asked the Joker as she answered, "Great as always, Mr. Jay!" She then pushed the button and all over the world, every screen showed the face of the Joker. "Ladies and gentleman of the world, my name, is Joker, and I am your newly appointed emperor of the world! HAHAHAHA!" "What's that? A documentary of my rise to power? I'd be honored!" he said as he giggled. "For many years I have been incubating a scheme that would lead to this moment, for I have rigged every single major capital city up with explosives! Plus, I have a hidden supply of missiles, which will make you die laughing, and I call them, my Jokerizers," he paused.

"Anyone wishing to come within Gotham to stop me will be Jokerized immediately," he once again paused. "No objections? Well, I guess the first order of my reign is TO CAPTURE THE BATMAN! Whoever finds the Batman must bring him to me either bounded or incapacitated, and anyone hiding and or helping Batman will be applicable and horribly executed for the world to see to set an example." "Oh, and one more thing, and this is for that fly boy in Metropolis; I've got plenty Kryptonite with your name on it, HAHAHAHAHA!" The camera was turned off and Harley applauded, along with the other inmates of Arkham Asylum. He giggled as Bullock suddenly wished Batman were here to stop this madness. The Joker's crazier than usual, what the hell set him off? He asked himself as he regretted believing that Batman would actually kill the commissioner and the mayor.

"That was incredible Mr. Jay!" exclaimed Harley Quinn as Joker chuckled. "Yes, quite a diabolical scheme this is, Joker old pal, however did you come up with it?" asked the Riddler. "I came up with it after Bat-breath dropped me into the vat of chemicals, I became a world criminal, setting up this very plan, gaining as much resources as I can get, until I became as rich as that billionaire playboy Bruce Wayne, but Batman diminished it when I came back to Gotham to obtain my revenge, until all I could do was this, and I never wanted to do this, but Batman has ruined my simple plans time and time again, until something just snapped," he explained. "However, I have learned a couple of interesting facts about the Dark Knight and me," he added thoughtfully. "Like what puddin'?" asked Harley Quinn. "I know Bat-breath's secret identity, and the other one, is more...troubling," Said the Joker distantly. "Who is he puddin'?" asked Harley as the Riddler dropped his cane. "That is something between me and Bat-breath, because I know one of you will try to find him and kill him yourself, and I have much better plans for him," replied the Joker with an evil smile.

"But it does not matter, tomorrow, he'll waltz right into this building, where his every single advisory is, just to save his friend, and to pummel me within an inch of my life, or even better, to kill me!" he replied as he exploded into laughter. "Although, it is unfortunate that Bane has been transported to a different city, and Catwoman is not present, which makes me wonder," replied the Joker as he pulled out his special deck of cards. He grabbed an ace of spades and placed it upon the table.

"Ladies, gentleman, this the day we declare war upon the world, the day we declare war against order and the law, this is the day we declare war upon the governments of the world, this is the day we declare war upon peace, this is the day we declare WAR ON BATMAN!" exclaimed the Joker as the gathering of villains cheered. Oh, how I wish he could just join me as soon as I tell him, but I know he will deny it, unless he tested our DNA afterwords, he thought to himself as he grabbed a vile, a needle with a tube, and poured some of his blood into that vile. "What are you doing, puddin'?" asked Harley. "I'm giving Bat-breath a clue," he replied with a smile. He then placed a cap on top of the vile and placed it in his coat pocket. He then looked at the remote which could launch the Jokerizers, which were stored underneath the very place where Joker was born. Axis Chemicals and Joker knew that the highway connecting Gotham to Axis Chemicals was not the only way to get to it, Joker knew of a secret entrance he himself constructed for this plan he concocted so long ago. Joker sat down in a chair and let his mind be engulfed by his memories.

"I love you, Martha," I said, and a tear rolled down her young beautiful face. "I love you too, Jack," she replied. Rain pelted us as we locked lips; the sweet taste of strawberries entered my mouth like a tidal wave, with a subtle hint of salt form the rain. We were fifteen years old, her and I, and we were madly in love with each other, and our future seemed bright as long as we were together. Later on that day, she introduced me to her friend, Thomas Wayne, who Martha trusted almost as much as she trusted me. We had no idea what the three of us had in store for the future.

Thomas and I bonded almost automatically, but I always did feel a little jealous, I knew he also loved Martha as I did. Martha and I were chemical partners in our sophomore year in High School, and I took to it so fast and well, I became top of that teacher's class. I always helped Martha whenever she needed help, but we both knew she was just as good as I was. Thomas was a brilliant business man, especially when it came to technology. However, I was an outcast compared to Thomas, who everyone seemed to love. Truth is, Martha and Thomas were the only friends I ever had. A year later, Martha and I decided to make love with each other for the first time, we both just turned sixteen. We couldn't help it, we were madly in love, and we both were extremely curious individuals. Two months later, I hear my darling Martha speak the three words that con forever shatter your world. "Honey, I'm pregnant," she said. I smiled, even though it was slightly uncommon in those days.

The next day, we told Thomas Wayne, and he gave me a look when Martha wasn't looking. How dare you? The look asked, and I looked straight at him and gave him my infamous smile that made everyone's blood run cold. This smile was different than the one Martha knew, she knew my true smile, but soon, that maniacal smile will become my only smile. Seven months later, our baby boy was born, and we named him Bruce. It was the happiest day of our lives. We moved in together two years later and cared for each other and Bruce as much as we can, but times were tough. To put bread on the table was a constant struggle. So one day, while at work, I over-hear a conversation between two men planning to rob a bank. Why I got involved, I don't know, but once you've hit a point in your life where you feel trapped, and you believe you cannot get out, I guarantee that you will do anything to get out of that situation.

"Can I be of any service?" I asked as the two men looked at each other, and then at me. "Sure, sit down, and we'll let you in on our plan," responded the man on the right. "We don't mind, as long as you don't mind wielding a gun," said the man on the left. "No, that won't be a problem," I lied as the two men nodded. "We will each get a share as long as we don't get caught and or killed," said the man on the right. "What's your name by the way?" asked the man on the left. I pulled out my special deck of cards, and on the top was a Joker card. "You may call me the Joker," I replied with my infamous smile to add to the affect. "You'll do," said the man on the right while the man on the left looked nervous. "As long as you keep smiling like that, I doubt you'll need to use that gun," replied the man on the left. So the plan was set, and the two men put on ski masks, my mask covered the top half of my face so I could use my infamous smile. We each went in with guns in or hands, and one of my comrades yelled, "Everybody on the ground now," and I came in smiling my evil smile.

I stood in front of the clerk who asked, "Why are you smiling?" "Because I enjoy my work." I replied as I chuckled my evil chuckle that made the clerk shiver with fear. "Give me all your money or I'll put a bullet through your head," I said cruelly. He opened the register and placed the money in the sack. Sirens sounded off in the background. "Shit, let's get out of here!" yelled one of my comrades. We ran out the door to see a cop already in front of the door. Out of fear and reflex, I pulled the trigger, and the cop went down to the ground with a bullet in his head. "Good shot, Joker!" cried my comrade as he whooped with celebration and the other one laughed. I was practically shaking. We ran for what seemed like forever until we finally lost them. We each got our share, and we went our separate ways. I took off my mask and placed the sack of money inside my coat pocket, and went home. Martha was sitting in front of the T.V., watching the robbery that I was involved in. "Honey, look at this," she said with a tear rolling down her face. "A cop was killed during a robbery," she continued as I sat down. My heart sank to my stomach and started gnawing at me from the inside. "Shhh, it's okay," I said, embracing her, stroking her trembling spine.

"I don't want Bruce to ever know how cruel this world is," she said. "Neither do I, but he will eventually learn this," I replied. She then wiped her tears from her eyes and she looked at me. "Are you okay, you seem bothered," she asked. "You know that it saddens me when you are unhappy," I replied. "No, it's something else," she replied. She then looked at the T.V. and saw me put the bullet through the cop's head. She then saw the smile. It even made my blood run cold. But a few seconds before, it showed me afraid, it showed my eyes widen. "Why does that man look like you?" she asked. She has seen me afraid before, but never that cold menacing smile. "It's not me," I replied as the news reported that I went under the alias of the Joker. "Wasn't that what Thomas called you?" she asked as I realized that she was right. Her eyes filled with fear. "You didn't, please tell me I didn't," she said as fresh tears rolled down her face. "I didn't mean to, I swear, it was a reflex," I said, trying to defend myself. "You robbed a bank and killed a cop!" she exclaimed. "I only robbed the bank because I don't want it to be so hard to make-ends-meet, I did it so I can support you and our Bruce," I replied. She was shaking, tears falling onto the floor like rain. "Why were you smiling when you shot him?" she demanded.

"That was my infamous smile, I've never shown you it because I didn't want to frighten you, but I swear to you, I did not enjoy killing that man," I replied. "How could you do this? Do you want to be in jail, missing every moment in Bruce's life? Bruce will be ridiculed by his schoolmates because you are in jail!" she replied. "No, that's not what I want for him, and you know that," I replied. Tears were rolling down my face now. "Where's the money?" she asked. I reached inside my pocket and placed it on the floor. "How could you?" she asked, her voice constricted by tears. "I did this for you and Bruce, and I did not mean to kill that cop," I said. "We were doing fine, granted, yes it's hard, but that's life, don't you understand?" she asked. "I just wanted to make it easier for us," I replied. "You've made it even harder because if I pretend this didn't happen, guilt will consume me until I snap," she said. "I'm sorry," I replied. "Tell that to the cop you killed," she replied. "I didn't mean to," I said as my anger began to rise. "Then why were you smiling?" she asked again. I sank to my knees. "I didn't mean to," I repeated. She crouched next to me, slapped me, and then kissed me. "I still love you," she sobbed. "I love you too," I replied as we both sat on the couch. "Leave," she said. "What?" I asked. "If you love Bruce and me, then, you should leave, turn yourself in if you wish," she suggested.

"But I love you, I cannot bear to live without you," I replied. She kissed me again. "That's why you must leave, because I know and I'm not going to turn you in, I'd be considered an accomplice, and we don't want to leave Bruce all alone in this world," she replied as we kissed again. "Will we ever see each other again?" I asked, and she looked down. "I don't know," she replied. I gently grasped her face, and looked into her eyes. "I just don't us both going to jail," she continued. "I want to see him grow too," I replied. "You should have thought of that earlier," she replied. I smacked her cheek, and then kissed her. She threw me off. "You hit me!" she cried. "You know I did not do it that hard," I replied. "But the fact remains, you struck me," she replied as a tear fell on the floor. "I still love you," I replied. "Get out, now, and I won't call the police," she warned. "Martha!" I replied. "Go, please, I do still love you, but I have to if you don't go," she replied. "Just promise me we can be together again," I pleaded. "I'm sorry, I cannot promise that, but I can promise you that I'll always love you," she replied. She kissed me and pointed to the door.

"Go, now," she said as I opened the door and a tear fell onto the door way. "Wait, could I at least hold my son one last time?" I asked as she nodded. I walked over to that play pen and picked up Bruce. He giggled as I tickled his belly and I embraced him, and he hugged me back. "I'll see you again, okay?" I said as his blue eyes looked into mine. "Bye-bye daddy," he replied. A tear rolled down. His first sentence, I never felt so proud. I put him back down and left the house hold as I looked into the night sky. Please let me be with them again, at least one last time, I asked the twinkling night sky as I strode into the uncertain night.

I entered the alley of which my alter ego was born, where Batman was born. It seemed like I was always Batman, but I knew I was once a boy. A naive and innocent rich boy, taking a shortcut through the alley way after we saw a movie. Why we went down that alley, I'll never know, but it seemed as though we were enjoying ourselves so much it didn't seem to matter where we were going. I grabbed my new suit, and took off the detachable artificial limbs and the self-sufficient battery and put on the rest of the suit. I then went up the elevator, feeling refreshed as I made my way towards the Gotham Police Department.

Joker then thought about the day he met up with Martha and Bruce in that alley that created Joker's arch-nemesis, Batman. It was dark, my buddy and I were looking for a quick grab and go, and we saw two large figures and one small one. When I saw it was Martha, Thomas and Bruce, my heart sank. I couldn't believe she's with Thomas. She then saw me and said, "You, how did you find us?" I just grabbed her necklace in anger, and Thomas then tried to get me off of her. I just wanted the necklace that I gave to her. My finger slipped and a bullet echoed throughout the alley. My heart sank, and something in me snapped as fear showed upon my son's face. I looked at Thomas, blaming him for making me kill her, and shot him right in the head. I looked at my son, almost ready to cry, and said, " We shall meet again, my son," and I walked into the mist, leaving him alone, unknowingly creating the man who would one day drop me into a vat of chemicals, the man who sent me so far into insanity that after being thwarted so many times by the Batman, I became depressed.

That's when I met the young Harley Quinzel. Without her, there's no doubt I would have not been able to continue this battle. She then fell in love with me, and I actually fell for her too. The only reason I treat her like dirt is so I can trick everyone into believing I don't care about her, that I'm just using her. I sometimes even trick myself into believing that. But I do care about her, I care about her so much I never want Batman to know, so I treat her like she is nothing. I know she still loves me, I know that she knows that I love her even though I sometimes abuse her. She has become my Harley Quinn, my sexy, adorable angel clad in a tight-fitting clown suit that makes my old hunger grow.

She's smart enough to know that I treat her the way I do so Batman won't use her against me. He looked at her and smiled. It wasn't the smile that he became infamous for, but with the smile that existed when he was with Martha. Sometimes, he wishes he didn't rob that bank, but most of the time, he doesn't care anymore. Most of the time he just laughs in spite of the hell that it has caused him. He would laugh at death itself, he would laugh at the Devil, and he would spit in the face of God, if there was one, and he would laugh in His face after.

I entered the lobby and saw with some interest that every single inmate from Arkham Asylum was here, excluding Bane and Catwoman. He knew that Bane was transferred, but where was Catwoman. It would have been nice to see one semi-friendly face of Selina Kyle, or also known as Catwoman. The very thought of the skin-tight reveling leather cat suit makes my blood boil. I then entered the Commissioner's office where Joker sat with his maniacal smile that never seems to falter. "Welcome, Batman!" cried the Joker. "Welcome, to your doom!" chuckled the Joker as he leapt over the desk. He swung a punch at me, but missed, and I returned with a body jab, out he grabbed my arm and twisted it behind my back. He kicked me into an open door, and I fell down a flight of stairs. He climbed down, laughing as he picked me up. "Hello, Bruce, my son," whispered the Joker. "What are you talking about?" I asked. "I am your daddy, Bruce!" he laughed as he gave me a bear hug, and then grabbed my hand with his novelty joy-buzzer as electricity went through my body.

"Thomas Wayne is my father," I groaned. Joker tsked, and replied, "Thomas Wayne was your step-father, and if you don't believe me, then take this and prove me wrong," he said as he gave me a vile of what looked like his blood. He then tried to kick me, but I grabbed his foot and swept the other one from under him. He fell down and he laughed. "Oh, Bruce, what great fun this is, unfortunately, it's going to have to end," he said as he grabbed a crow bar from under the stairs. He swung it down, but I grabbed it, he elbowed me, sending pain into my jaw, and he whacked me in the face with the crow bar. I fell down, and he hit my side with the crow bar three times and punched me in the face. I spat blood into his face. "You've been a bad boy, daddy needs to punish you!" he said as he chuckled. I kicked his knee and he dropped the crow bar. I grabbed it and struck him across the face. He fell, and he began to laugh as my anger began to rise.

"Go ahead, kill me, become one of us, become my successor!" he cried as he laughed. "Punish your daddy, Bruce, do it!" he cried, I dropped the crow bar and threw him to the other side of the room. Then, something landed on me, and I fell to the floor. "Are you okay, puddin'?" asked Harley. "Just fine, darlin' now let poor Batman up so he can defend himself," he replied as she dismounted. I stood up as my breath was coming in quick and shallow. I touched the corner of my mouth, and looked at it, seeing my own blood on my finger. I turned around and snap-marred Harley to the ground. "Nobody takes Harley to the ground, except me!" cried the Joker as he swung the crow bar in an upward swoop, sending me flying into the floor. I spat blood onto the floor as he picked me up and brought me back upstairs. "I'm going to dump you in the river like you dumped me into the vat of chemicals," he said and I tried to push him off of me. He hit the crow bar across my shoulder, and dragged me through the hall where all of my enemies were.

Soon, I was somewhere in-between consciousness and unconsciousness when I pried out of his grasp. I found Alfred and let him go through the window, and then I fell to the floor. "Sir!" he cried. "Go to the alley Alfred, they won't go after you," I replied weakly as he looked at me, and he ran just before the Joker came in. He picked me up and laughed. "Fine, I'll let your butler live another day, Bruce," whispered Joker as we exited the police department. I soon fell unconscious. I felt slapping and I awoke to Joker, holding me over the river. "I wanted to make sure you wouldn't drown, Batsy!" he said as he laughed. He let me go and air whooshed in my ears as I tried to activate my cape, but I was too weak. I plunged into the water with a viscous crash, trying to swim to the bank a few feet in front of me, but the current was too strong. Joker then wiped his hands together and left laughing. That was the last sound I heard before I went under. After what seemed like an eternity of floating in the water, half conscious and half drowning, I felt someone grab me under my arms and heard a familiar voice. "I got you," she said as everything faded to black.

I woke up to a swirling image of Catwoman, and at first I thought I was dreaming. "Are you okay?" she asked, and I saw that she had me tied up in her whip. "Bruce, how many fingers am I holding up?" she asked as I muttered, "How did you find out?" I asked. "I took off your mask." She replied. "Why did you save me?" I asked as she smiled. I love that smile, I thought to myself as I stood up. "Well, it seems as though the Joker has got you completely cornered, so I figured I'd help," she replied. "What's in it for you?" I asked as she laughed. "My motives are my own, but I'm sure you will know of them soon," she replied as I started to look around. "Where's my mask?" I asked. She lifted her arm, and there, in her other hand was my mask. I struggled as she placed her heel on my chest and placed me back to the ground.

"Not so fast, Bruce, you and I both know you're going to need help thwarting the Joker, and you're going to have to trust me," she said as I continued to struggle. "What if you betray me?" I asked as she chuckled. "If I wanted you dead, I would have let you drown," she replied. "I guess, I have no other option, seeing you temporarily have the upper hand, I said as I grabbed a Batarang and started to cut the whip. She then yanked at it, sending me spinning and the Batarang fell on the ground. "If we're going to work together, we have to trust each other, or else you'll be all alone, surrounded by enemies, and no one around to help," she said as she wrapped the whip in her belt. "Fine," I replied as I grabbed her hand. "Truce?" she asked as I smiled. "Truce," I replied.

"So, Bruce, do you have a plan, or are we just going to set up camp here?" she asked. "My dear Selina, did you honestly think I didn't have a place to go for situations like this?" I asked as she smiled. "Follow me," I said as I stood up and started walking towards the alley. As we neared it she asked, "This place, isn't it Crime Alley?" she asked as we entered the alley. The memories started coming through in waves, the gunshot was echoing through my brain. "Yes, this is Crime Alley, this is where it all started," I replied. "All what started?" she asked. "This is where I made a vow to protect the innocent and stop any crime committed, without stooping to their level," I replied as she looked around." What happened to you here?" she asked. "My parents were gunned down by the Joker," I said as I saw the entrance to my cave. "Although, due to recent events, I'm not sure whether or not both of my biological parents are dead," I said. "What do you mean?" she asked. "Joker told me something... Troubling, something that I do not believe, but I have to test it so I can be sure he's lying," I replied. I went through the entrance and entered the elevator, and she followed suit. The elevator dinged and the metallic doors slid open, and I took the vial of Joker's blood from my utility belt. I placed it into the super-computer and first I made sure the blood in the vial was indeed Jokers.

After seeing that it was his blood, I took off the top part of my suit and put my own blood into a clean vial and placed it in the super-computer. The computer whirred until it finally said that "Subject B is the offspring of subject A," I then growled. "No, it's not possible!" I exclaimed as I ran the test again, and again. The same result kept showing up as beads of sweat were running down my face. "NO!" I exclaimed again. "What's it mean?" asked Catwoman. "Joker was right about the thing he told me," I replied. "He's your father?" she asked. "It appears so, but I still need to take him down, but, I need a plan," I said as I sat down in my chair. "First, we need to get me off Joker's radar," I continued. "How are you planning to do that?" she asked. "I've got it!" I replied. "Alfred, come here," I said. "Yes sir?" "First, is the Joker my father?" I asked as Alfred swallowed hard. "I'm afraid it is true, sir, Joker is your father," he replied. "Alright, second question, could you make a grave that has my name on it, and prepare a funeral for me," I replied. "You're going to fake your own death? How?" asked Catwoman.

"Well, once the funeral's set up, you'll go to Joker and tell him that you found me dead because of the battle wounds and drowning," I replied. "Once you tell him the location of my 'grave site', he will come to my funeral to see for himself that I am dead," I continued. I then set up a document, and the floor plans of the Gotham Police department. "Then, we start forming our attack plan, but first, you're going to have to get Bullock, and bring to the entrance of the alley," I said.

He was sitting in his chair, waiting for Batman to return, relishing at the possible reaction he had when he figured that he was Batman's father. Then, Catwoman entered the room, and Joker smiled at her. "Where have you been, you missed all the fun!" he exclaimed as he burst into laughter. "I found Batman laying dead on the bank of the river, it appears he died because of the wounds you probably inflicted, and he drowned at some point in the river because of his weakened state and the many rocks that could have incapacitated him," replied Catwoman. "You're joking," replied the Joker as he giggled. "I'm afraid he is dead, his butler is performing a funeral for him near his parent's grave," replied Catwoman. "Batsy is dead? He was supposed to survive and join me," he said to himself. "I guess I did pummel him pretty well, and the river didn't help either," he replied. "Harley, come with me, we're going to see Batsy's grave!" he bellowed. He threw on his purple over coat and put on his purple hat.

Then he and Harley exited the room as Joker thought to himself, Batman, dead? It can't be. As they stepped into the cemetery, and there stood Bruce Wayne's butler, looking sorrowful and exhausted. "We are here today to celebrate the memory of a man that kept a vow to his grave, a man who went beyond the call of duty to do what he believed was right," he paused, taking a tissue from a box and blew his nose. "From his parents' tragic death, he has kept an oath to protect this fair city," he paused, wiping his tears from his face. "He became Batman, the Dark Knight, to defend the innocent, avenge his parents' death, and to stop the corruption and crime within this city," the butler fell silent. "May he rest in peace," he said as he walked away. "Bruce Wayne was Batman?" asked Harley. "Yes, he was, and he was also," the Joker paused as a single tear rolled down his face. And then, it started to rain. "My son," he whispered as he kneeled in front of the tombstone. Thunder growled like a ravenous monstrosity, and the rain began to pelt all that beheld its fury. he grabbed a spray paint can and started to spray a message on the back of the tombstone.

"This is my last laugh, HA HA HA" in seeping bright green letters. He then tossed the button to set off the bombs and missiles by the tree. "Why did you do that Mr.. Jay?" asked Harley. "Because, without old Bat-breath, it's not going to be as fun," he replied. "Let's go Harley," he said as he grabbed her hand and they took towards the police station.

Meanwhile, at the Gotham Police station, Catwoman confronted Bullock. "How are we going to get past the goons from the loony bin?" he asked. "Leave that to me," she said as she threw her arm forward, her whip flying through the air like an air-born snake. It wrapped around his body. "This could work," he said as she dragged him through the door and into the stolen car that Catwoman brought. She then drove him to the alleyway and unwrapped Bullock. "Batman, about the tape," Bullock began, "Save it for later, Bullock, now take these explosives and attach them to the support beams in the cellar, and place this in the road leading to the police station," I replied. "If the wheel doesn't go over, it is also censored by motion, magnets and thermal activity, and if that doesn't work, stand in the next building and wait for Joker to get close to the station," I replied. "Why don't we let Joker in the building and get blown up with the rest?" asked Bullock. "Same reason that the Joker didn't allow me in Arkham when it blew up," I paused. "I need to isolate him, and destroy him with my own hands," I replied.

As Joker neared the police station, he reflected upon the many battles between him and Batman. The car rolled on the road, and Joker looked to the Gotham Police Department. Then, the police department erupted with a pillar of flame and debris began falling from the sky like smoldering rain, glass falling down like hail. Smoke billowed from the windows and ruined walls as the pyre was reaching towards the sky. "What the devil?" asked the Joker. He giggled as he started to drive towards the entrance to the tunnel to Axis Chemicals. Joker and Harley exited the car and began walking through the tunnel until they were within Axis Chemicals. "Alright Harley, now we wait here until who ever blew up the police station to get here," he said as Harley nodded. Then, there was a crash through the window, and Batman and Catwoman landed in front of them. "Batman? I thought you were dead!" exclaimed the Joker.

"I faked it so I could get off your radar," I replied. "Nice job, son," said the Joker as he exploded with laughter. I then lunged towards Joker while Catwoman lashed her whip at the floor and lunged at Harley Quinn. I threw punch after punch at Joker, my arch-enemy and father, but he was dealing a good amount of damage to me as much as I was to him. The Joker pulled out a gun and pointed it at me. He pulled the trigger and a flag popped out that exclaimed "BANG!" He then aimed it at Catwoman, and pulled the trigger, and I disarmed him seconds after the bullet fired. I watched in horror as I saw it go right through her heart. I ran to her, but I knew that it was too late. "I wish that we could have been together longer," she said weakly. Her eyes grew glassy and her head lolled to the side. "YOU BASTARD!" I roared with anger.

"You killed one of the only allies I had left," I said as tears began to constrict my throat. The Joker laughed. "Harley, do me a favor, leave us," he said. "But puddin'!" exclaimed Harley. "No, I want to face him alone, plus I don't want him to kill you," he replied. Harley ran out of my sight as I looked upon Joker with my fists at the ready, trying so hard not to kill him now, trying to not break the most important part of my vow. The Joker looked at me and he smiled and laughed as he grabbed a crow bar from floor. "Let's dance, sonny boy!" exclaimed the Joker as he burst into laughter and charged at me. I roared with anger and charged at him, and got a crow bar to the face. I then responded by throwing a hay maker, and disarming him. I then picked up the crow bar. "Yes, that's right, kill me, succeed your father, take your place in the throne of chaos and insanity," said the Joker as he spat blood upon the floor.

"SHUT UP YOU DEMENTED CLOWN!" I bellowed as I threw the crow bar aside and threw a kick to his temple. He grabbed my leg and swept the other one. I landed on the floor, but I got back up to greet another whack with a crow bar. I grabbed the crow bar and we started to fight for it. "The only way you're going to stop me is if you kill me, your own father," mocked the Joker. "I am going to beat you to a pulp, and then I'm going to-" I started, but the Joker cut me off, "What, apprehend me with those cute bat-shaped hand-cuffs and send me to another loony bin in another town, just to escape and start this cat-and-mouse game all over again?" He shoved me to the ground, and then, I realized that he was right. This had to end in order to protect the world from this madman. Even if he is my father. Plus I wouldn't technically be breaking my vow, I promised my mother and my step-father that I wouldn't kill anyone, but since I thought that Thomas Wayne was my real father, I promised my dead parents this vow. Since Joker is my father and still alive, that would make the vow void. I charged at the Joker and throw a body blow and a punch to his jaw. He groaned and hit my neck with the crow bar, and then struck it against my head. He then ran laughing into his secret tunnel, and I heard a car start.

I followed the tunnel and jumped into my Bat mobile and chased him down the intricate web of streets of Gotham. Joker's car was just ahead as we started to bump each other. However, he got more damage than I did, so he just went faster until he suddenly tried to stop, but he hit the wall. I then realized we were at the entrance to Crime Alley. The Joker got out of his car and ran laughing into the alley way. I got out and followed the sound of his maniacal laughter. The shadows engulfed me as I walked through this haunted place of hellish memories and demonic nightmares. Then, the Jokers laugh echoed, and then I saw him standing, ready to fight.

"Let's go Bruce, mono-a-mono," he said as he giggled. I threw a punch to his face, but he blocked it and hit me with his open palm, and I felt electricity run through me. I growled as he stepped away and laughed. I grabbed his arm and bent it to a dangerous angle, but he punched me. The joy-buzzer he used on me fell through a sewer grate and it landed with a sploosh. "You never could take a joke could you?" he asked as he threw a punch to my jaw. I responded with a body blow, but he blocked it and kicked my breast and I stumbled to regain my balance. He then pounced and started swinging his fists upon my face until I threw him into the opposite wall as the sound of the impact reminded me of the gunshot that echoed through this alley way so long ago. I charged, but he grabbed me and slammed me into the wall and threw me to the ground. I then kicked his abdomen, making him keel-over a little, and I got up and tackled him to the ground. He started to laugh. He then launched me against the wall using his legs as a little pain erupted within me.

He then kicked my head and lifted me by my shoulders and kneed me in the gut. I threw a punch to his jaw and kicked him in the groin. "Ohoho, you're going to pay for that you little brat," he said as he cackled. He charged and threw a punch, but I blocked it and threw my own. He ducked and drove his shoulder into my abdomen and slammed me into the ground. He then began to search for something to hit me with. He grabbed a newspaper and he started to laugh.

"I'm going to beat you like a dog," he said through clenched teeth as he began whacking me in the face and laughing hysterically. I shoved him off of me and I grabbed a trash can and smashed it into his skull. He stumbled and chuckled. He then charged and threw a kick to my breast, but I dodged and responded with an elbow to the jaw. He then leg-swept me, and I rolled backwards to avoid striking the ground again. He spat out some of his blood to the ground and began to laugh again.

"Stop holding back and pummel me already you big wuss!" he challenged as he ran at me laughing. I grabbed him and drove him into the ground and started pummeling him with all that I had, and he was still laughing. He finally shoved me to the ground and threw me against the wall, kneed my head and drove an elbow into my abdomen and smashed my face into the wall. "Yes, that's more like it, destroy your father with the hands that your mother and I gave to you," he said as he wiped the blood from his mouth. "You are not my father!" I exclaimed as I jumped on top of him and pounded him with all my might until I lost myself to the rage I kept locked up for so long. He then grabbed a beer bottle and smashed it into my skull.

"Don't go thinking I left her because of you, I left because I didn't want you to suffer for my mistakes, or your mother for that matter, but now I just don't give a damn!" he replied. He launched me into the wall and started punching me then he grabbed me and brought me closer to his pale white face, and I looked into his eyes and all I saw was lunacy, murder, hatred and a hint of sorrow. He grabbed a baseball bat from the garbage can and he swung, but I grabbed it. "What's the matter, don't you wanna play ball with your old man?" he asked as he punched me in the face and smashed the bat to bits across my face. "Oooh, and it's a homerun!" he cried as he burst into laughter. "Instead of just killing me and or joining me, you had to be all self-righteous and not listen to your instincts." he paused as he giggled. 'We are animals, we are meant to kill!" he cried as a new wave of laughter erupted from him. I got up, feeling my strength began to weaken. He ran and we grappled one another.

"Why don't you show your face you coward, I already know who you are, sonny boy!" he cried as he took off my cowl and tossed it out of sight. I threw a punch and followed up with a leg sweep and then I brought him up and slammed him into the wall. He laughed as he threw a punch across my face, then he picked up a shard of the broken bat, and he tried to stab me in the throat, but I dodged and I grabbed a shard about the same size and shape as Joker. We then charged and grappled again, the shards inched from our faces. I threw him against the wall and charged. I felt a sharp object burst through my neck, and I felt some warm liquid splatter on my face and the hand in which I held my shard of wood. We fell to the floor, and the Joker was chuckling weakly. "You've made your father proud," he whispered as I crawled over and punched him weakly. The darkness began to engulf me and the last thing I saw, was the bat I saw years ago, the very same bat that gave me inspiration that made me take upon this now voided vow. Then, everything went to dark as I felt peace, and a lightness I have never known before.