We Must Survive Even the Darkest of Days

Chapter One

"Fire Lord! Fire Lord Zuko!" the attendant yelled, running into the office. Zuko looked up, worry etched in his eyes. The attendant opened his mouth to speak, but found his voice gone. He merely closed his eyes, looked down, and just shoot his head. Zuko stood, the chair he had been sitting on flying back in his haste as he ran from the room, the attendant unmoving.

'No. This can't be happening. This can't!' Zuko kept saying, over and over, in his mind as he ran down the halls, his royal robes billowing out behind him as he hurried to his room. As servants saw him pass in his hurry, the fear in his eyes, they knew what was happening.

They knew today was her last day.

"Mai!" Zuko cried, throwing open the door to his bed chambers. His eyes didn't notice the elegant furniture, or the rich red walls as he barged in. His eyes just fell on the bed, where the woman he loved laid. Mai's eyes were closed, and Katara hovered over her, her palms glowing with the blue of her attempt at healing. Sweat coated Katara's brows as she fought to save Mai, and the child that was killing Mai from the inside.

"Zu...ko..." he heard Mai whisper, and he rushed to her side, grabbing her hand gently. Her breathing was labored.

"Come on, Mai! Push!" Katara shouted at her, as another contraction struck Mai.

Zuko looked down at Mai, pleading her with his eyes to be okay. She had to be okay. How could it have seemed, only five months ago, that this pregnancy would be a good thing?

Zuko sat outside, looking at the Turtle Duck pond that his mother had loved. He missed her. When he had tried to ask his father of her fate, he had simply replied, "Why should I tell you? You, you have aided in stealing my firebending, stealing my throne? You have taken everything from me. For your treachery, I can not punish you from the binds of this cell, except never to tell you of your mother's fate!" Zuko knew not what to do from that point on, and was forced to give up, that if his mother lived, she would find a way to him. A guard suggested torture, but Zuko had outlawed torture as inhumane, and against the Way to Peace that he so wished for.

After being Fire Lord for a year and a half, Zuko knew his mother was dead. Zuko looked to the sky, and sighed. "Happy birthday, mother. I will always miss you." He whispered.

"Zuko!" A familiar voice called, and Zuko looked up, to see his wife, Mai, running towards him, a smile across her face. The smile instantly piked Zuko's curiousity, as he had only really seen her smile twice. When she was released from prison, and the day they married.

"Yes, Mai?" Zuko asked, the excitement and joy on her face forcing a smile onto his own.

"Zuko, do you remember how I asked for you to bring the Waterbender-Katara-here?" Mai asked, sitting down on the bench next to him.

"Of course. You practically demanded me to write her, and then made me demand her to come!" Zuko replied. He had been married to Mai for a year by then, he had learned not to ask when his knife-throwing lover seemed to set her mind to something.

"She arrived yesterday, with the Avatar. I must ask, did the bison smell bad even when you travelled with them?"

"I wonder why it took her a month and a half to get here. Guess expanding the Southern Water Tribe demanded more of her attention than she had previously anticipated. And, yes, Appa did always smell. Imagine being around him when he was wet. Nothing worse than wet bison smell." Zuko replied, lifting his one good eyebrow in curiosity.

"Well, I didn't just invite her up here for a cup of tea. Aren't you going to ask why she's here?" Mai said.

Zuko snorted, "I know you'll just tell me eventually, so why bother to ask?"

Mai rolled her eyes, then replied, "I'm pregnant."

Zuko's mouth dropped. Mai's face (still weird from her smile), showed amusement. "You don't look like very royal, Fire Lord." she taunted.

"You're...with child." Zuko managed. Mai nodded.

"That's why I wanted Katara here. To confirm it. I've skipped before, I didn't want to get your hopes up. And she's also told me, that it will be male, and a firebender, like you."

Zuko's face mirrored Mai's, as joy spread across his features. Among the names he was called-Fire Lord, Zuko, all the nicknames Toph had for him-Daddy was about to be added to the list. And he would be a better father than Ozai ever was.

In the month after, Zuko convinced Katara and Aang to stay, for the birth of his child. He wanted the Avatar there, a symbol of hope, at the birth of the next Fire Lord. He also wanted Katara to deliver the child. She was a close friend, and he didn't want some strange mid-wife he had never met before touching his newborn.

Katara ran weekly checks on Mai, using her waterbender healing abilities to fix anything that may go wrong, and to keep Mai in perfect health. Katara, Aang, Sokka, and Toph had stayed in the Fire Nation for half a year after the War ended, hunting down and sometimes taking away the bending abilities of some of the last of Ozai's radical followers. During that time, Mai and Katara had become close friends. It had confused Zuko to no end, but he just assumed opposites had attracted.

As Mai had entered her third trimester, serious problems had sprung. Katara had detected it, and she had been fighting ever since. No one knew what was wrong with Mai. Since the detection, Mai had been bedridden in her and Zuko's room, and Katara had barely left Mai's side, except to fetch food or more water when the servants were too slow for Katara's taste.

Zuko had been such a mess that Aang had taken it upon himself to check up frequently on the Fire Lord. Zuko was grateful. The servants nor the nobles who frequently stayed in the castle could see Zuko when he was so emotional, as his sadness had a tendency to show itself in the form of violence and burning anything and anyone near him. In his fits of rage, the Avatar was the only one who could survive and easily defend himself against the Fire Lord's fire blasts.

Zuko clung to Mai's sweaty hand, holding it against his scarred cheek. He attempted to smile, trying to comfort her. He knew normal childbirth was painful, but with Mai having problems, the pain must be worse than the norm by a hundredfold. Mai did the same. Even in pain, she was trying to cheer him up. Her face was contorted as another contraction ripped through her, and she screamed. Zuko felt the tears start down his face, and he clung harder to her.

Aang came hurrying in, probably hearing the scream. With his airbender powers, he could have been a mile away a few seconds ago and still heard Mai's scream.

"Zuko," Katara said, looking up at him. "You need to get out of here."

"What?" he demanded.

"Zuko," Aang said, setting his hand on Mai's shoulder. "You will just distract Katara. Come with me. It'll be okay."

Zuko opened his mouth to argue, but Mai's soft voice cut him off. "Get out of here, Zuko. I do not want you to see me like this. I'll see you when I have our baby son in my arms, okay?" she said, sliding her slender hand out of his.

Hopelessness stabbed into his heart. For once, he was grateful Toph was not there. He had a feeling that Aang and Mai were lying to him, and he didn't need Toph to confirm it. Zuko hung his head and stood, letting the Avatar lead him from the room. Another scream ripped from Mai as Zuko walked out the door, and only the increase of pressure from the Avatar's hand on Zuko's shoulder kept him from turning around and running back to her side.

Aang closed the door behind him, cutting off Mai's scream.

They walked in silence for what felt like hours, days, weeks, when in all actuality it was not more than an hour. An hour into the walk, Aang stopped, his head tilted to the side.

"Katara is calling. Come," Aang said, turning. Zuko followed behind, noticing the young monk for the first time. He did not wear the outfit Zuko had known before. He wore the robes of a fully trained airbender monk. The boy had also grown, and was now as tall as Zuko himself. Guess two years brought out a lot more change than anyone thought.

Zuko resisted the urge to run. He had already ran wildly through the palace earlier that day, he didn't need to cause a scene again, so he followed calmly behind the Avatar.

Once they reached the door to his room, Zuko's heart leapt in hope. Katara was standing outside the closed doors, a small bundle in her arms. Zuko could hear cries coming the blankets in her arms.

"Katara...?" Zuko began, but stopped, not sure what to ask. If his baby was healthy, then so was his wife, right? He ran past her, forcing the doors open, looking for Mai. Zuko's heart froze. Two attendants were in his room, one of which was the one which had rushed into Zuko's office earlier that day. Zuko saw them transfer Mai from the bed onto a stretcher, and then cover her with a brilliant red sheet, lifting up above her face.

The attendants looked up at him in shock. He obviously wasn't supposed to have seen that.

"Mai..." Zuko said, collapsing to his knees, one hand on the door frame. Katara knelt down next to him, still holding the bundle to her chest. "I'm sorry, Zuko. The stress on her body was too much. If it's any consolation, she got to see your child before her heart gave out. I can't figure out what happened, Zuko. I've never seen anything like this." Katara said as the attendants exited through a different door. Zuko's eyes were still frozen on the spot where the stretcher had been before. Mai. Zuko would never see her again.

"Zuko, look at me." Katara said firmly. Zuko looked at her, sorrow in his eyes.

"Look," she said softly, moving so Zuko could see the baby boy in Katara's arms. He wasn't crying anymore. Shouldn't he be crying?

Zuko gently took the baby from Katara, looking down at the child. He was plump, with dark tufts of black hair. His eyes were closed, but if they opened, Zuko had a feeling they'd be the amber gold of the Fire Nation.

"What's his name?" Aang asked, standing behind Zuko.

"Lu Ten. His name is Lu Ten. After my cousin." Zuko replied, his voice shaky.

"That's a lovely name, Zuko." Katara said, then paused. She cleared her throat, then spoke again. "Zuko...I need to run some tests on Lu Ten. Is that alright? His birth wasn't smooth, I need to make sure he's healthy."

"Make sure I don't lose him, Katara. I trust you." he said, handing the baby back to Katara. "Can I be alone for a little while? Please?"

"Are you sure that's wise, Zuko? Maybe you shouldn't stay in this-" Aang began.

"Get out!" Zuko yelled, clenching his fists.

Katara looked taken aback, but stood anyway, keeping Lu Ten save in her arms. Aang wrapped his arm around her waist, muttering "Come on. He needs some time." softly to her. Katara obeyed, and they left, with Aang closing the door behind them.

Once they were gone, even balancing on his knees was too hard. He collapsed onto his side, and curled up into a ball.

For hours, Zuko just cried.