Title: Distance
Day / Theme: Jan 8 / Tomorrow I will have no shame
Series: Skip Beat
Character(s) / Pairing: Ren
A/N: No, I really shouldn't be writing from his point, but the prompt appeared, Ren smiled that smile, and I caved. D:
Also, I used some English points. Like not mentioning names and then slightly changing how things are mentioned to the end... Not effectively done yet, but it's a start.
I love Ren's father and his father/son scenes with Kyoko... I want to write something on those two later, but this will have to do for now.
Summary: It isn't quite missing or longing or hate or anything as simple as that. If it where, it could be solved in less than five years.
...
...
It isn't quite missing. Or longing. Or any of those feelings. It is, in part, because he does miss them. Long for them.
(for her adjusting his collar, a bright smile on her face, for him to flick him and give a confident grin.)
He sees their ghosts, sometimes, haunting his apartment. It's foolish, they don't know where he lives, don't know who he is now, but he sees them all the same. She'll be trying to cook and he'll be trying to help and nothing has changed, nothing is amiss.
Only.
Only he knows he doesn't belong in that world, not now at least. Maybe not anymore. He can't quite hear about her without cringing, can't see his name without almost panicking.
This is not how one should react to their parents. He does it all the same.
(and maybe, there is a little hate, a little anger, a little jealousy in those feelings, because sometimes it seems like they are getting along just fine without him, that they aren't suffering from his loss)
(and then maybe there is a little relief, because they aren't letting their problem child wound them anymore)
It's when those ghosts get too strong, when their sway gets too powerful, that he needs to move once more.
"They don't know where you'll live," the president assures him as he moves to his latest apartment.
"I know."
That doesn't quite stop him from looking at his mailbox or phone, when it's late at night or early in the morning or when he's caught off guard.
He is still a child in that sense, still waiting for his father to come and rescue him.
(But his father is the one who put him there and when was he able to start thinking of that man as his father?)
Ren is also a man now, and there are some problems that can only be fixed by yourself. He knows that.
He knows that.
He also knows that one day he wants to visit them, wants to see how the years have aged them and how worry has trekked across their features. Wants to see how the house has changed and if she still is dramatic and if he still likes take over the couch when he's lazy.
Wants to see them and say thank you and I'm sorry and I don't deserve anything-
Most of all, if Kuon is strong enough to face them or if Ren will win out in the end.