Disclaimer: I don't own Ran or Ken or anyone that has to do with Weiß or Schwarz *sighs sadly* *runs off with Schuldig, Ran and Ken* shhhh you didn't see that...
~*~Chapter One~*~ Memories
I sat up from my cold bed looking around me not liking what I saw...until my eyes came to the picture that never left the night stand next to my bed. It was a picture of the day that we went to the park...I can never forget that day...
The day that I told him how I felt.
I smiled as tears fell down my face as the memory brought sadness to my heart...
Sadness that only a lover would feel.
~*~Flashback~*~
I sat there crying my eyes out...I just heard that my parents were killed in a wreck...yeah sure I hadn't seen them for a long time and to them I was dead but it still hurt...hurt so much to know that my family was gone...Weiss was my family but how could I deny that I cared for my parents...the three other Weiss members just stood around not knowing what to do. I looked at them and my eyes came to rest on the tall redhead. I thought once that I liked him but quickly put out the idea in my head...me liking a guy no way...Yohji now we never know.
That thought sent a somewhat sad ripple of laughter through me but not penetrating the surface. How many days went by that I found my self watching his every move...this redhead made me feel things I never felt before...but why am I thinking of this when all my heart can fill is pain. Pain...is all it ever felt. We soon got into the car and drove home...no one spoke a word.
We all got out the car the same way; I went up to my room to cry more not caring what the others did. A few minutes a heard a soft knock on the door I struggle to suppress my urge to curse and tell them to leave me the fuck alone...why can't they leave me alone.
I decided against my curses and kept quite...hoping that they would think me asleep. But the gods hated me...the person knocked again a little bit more loudly...I kept quite hoping they would just go away!
"Ken?"
The soft voice that I so long to hear before called my name...why did it have to be Aya...I thought I was over him but I guess I wasn't. I tried telling my self that I didn't love him but it never did work...he wouldn't love me anyways we all knew how Aya held the eye of every girl that walked into the flower shop...
"Ken please I need to talk to you"
I sat up a little...why would he want to talk to me!? I don't need him...but I know that's a lie I do need him. So much it makes my heart hurt even more. I thought maybe he would get the idea I didn't want to talk to anyone...which I knew was a lie but the redhead could never know that. Slowly I saw the door creak open. I guess he wasn't going to give up...I just stare at him as he comes into the room and shuts the door behind him. Why won't he just leave me alone? I watch as he walked to my bed and sat down...why does my heart hurt so...
"Ken I'm sorry about your parents"
He looked at me and I saw not the mask that he usually wore but sadness in those amethyst eyes. I turn my head from him not wanting to look at those sad eyes...why won't he leave me alone...
"Ken. Please look at me."
I refuse his plea even though I knew that in it held longing...Longing I'm just joking with my self he doesn't care. No one does.
"Ken Please..."
He stops but reaches out his hand touching my chin softly moving my face to face his. His eyes shine with tears that he would never shed...Aya...almost crying...This was almost unbelievable. He wouldn't cry for me...no one would.
"Ken I know you hurt...and I know that what I said a week ago probably doesn't help much but..."
I suddenly remember about what he had said....
*inter-flashback*
He sat there looking at me wondering what I wanted to talk to him about...he didn't even know that I was about to tell him that I liked him...
"Aya...I like you...as more than a friend..."
I finally get it out but can't look into the redhead's eyes. I hoped and prayed that he would say that he liked me too...
"Ken...I...I'm sorry..."
That's all he said before he got up and walked to the door...I wasn't going to let him just walk out and not say why or even finish his sentence.
"Tell me the rest Aya"
I still couldn't look into his eyes...he didn't say anything or move until finally his soft low voice broke the silence.
"Ken I'm not that way I don't like you and never will so just leave it at that? I have been seeing you eyes and don't like it so leave alone...."
He ran out of the room then...leaving me with that...
*end of inter-flashback*
The last thing he said was for me to leave him alone and that's what I did....after that day all I did was cry in my room...I locked the door and told them I was sick...finally almost a week after Aya told me about how he felt I was getting better....But today we got that call and...And...why did they have to die...I know that I didn't live with them but...that didn't mean I didn't love them.....I felt tears form in my eyes I couldn't hold it in anymore...soon I started sobbing over the loss of my family...A warm had touched my forehead and ran through my hair...Aya...He's still here...but why...I move my head to look up at him, tears still falling...
"Why....have you stayed with me?"
He looked at me with sadness in his Amethyst eyes...but he told me to leave him alone...
"I'm sorry Ken...I shouldn't have said what I said...I was scared..."
He looked down at my bed...Scared? But why...I don't understand why he would be scared. Aya...Aya has never been scared ever in his life!...I don't believe this...he is just making up excuses so that he can seem all innocent and make him self feel better because I knew he knew that I was hurt by what he had said.
I looked at him. I wanted to just give in but I knew I couldn't there was no way in the world...I have been hurt too much and more hurt is NOT what I need right now!
"I'm sorry Aya but I need to be alone..."
He looked so hurt...He got up with out saying anything and walked out...Did I do the right thing? Or was he telling the truth...I guess I will never know will I? I laid my head down on the sheets of my bed and felt the coolness of the silk seep into me. So cold. Always so cold. While laying there not saying a word I started to listen to the words of the song on the radio.
The pouring rain soaks everything
You, who I loved, fade away...
Even though I'm pounded by the dull rain,
I don't need an umbrella,
Because I'm alone.
So that's what my life is going to be like...an endless world of rain...of being alone.
A.N. Well here is the first chapter of my new RanxKen fanfic ^^ I really missed ranxken stuff since I totally exploded on SchuxRan stuff lol anyways this is really sad and well this fic is going to be really sad alllllll the way through it so deal with it lol! Anyways lots of RanxKen-ness in this fic oh yes in deed lol well I will write more Please Review!!!!!!!!! It means soooo much to me when you do....thanks a million and more...bai bai