Title: For Lack of a Better Idea
Pairing: Tiva, with slight McAbby and Jibbs (referenced)
Rating: K+
Summary: Tony wakes up to foggy memories of the night before... Beer, bourbon, a boat and Rule #12 slowly start to piece together in his mind.
Basement. Boat. Bourbon. That's really as much as Tony could remember. He scratched his head as he rolled over in a bed that wasn't his own and glanced around at the lack of décor. Oh yeah.. Gibbs. He sat up, very slowly as to not anger his already pounding headache. The last thing he remembered was being at the bar with McGee, then… a cab? Yeah, must have been a cab. Why couldn't McGee take him home? He looked around and found his jacket with an empty envelope, slightly crumpled. He furrowed his brow in confusion. So they went out drinking and for whatever reason McGee left without him. What a good friend he is, he thought callously. And then what? He got into a cab… he remembered being the basement and finding the bourbon, not that it was all too well hidden. His mind flashed an image of Gibbs walking down the stairs in another one of his old NIS shirts. He hears Gibbs laughing in his head, what made him laugh? They worked on the boat, or Tony thinks he tried at least… His mind couldn't seem to get out of a fog and couldn't get any more answers about the night before. Well. Only one way to find out.
He entered the kitchen quietly and he saw his boss sipping coffee and reading the paper.
"Ah, what a quaint little morning we have here, huh boss?" trying to play it cool he ignored the intense pain in his head and poured himself a cup of coffee and sat across from his boss.
"Uh huh." Gibbs' eyes never left the paper and he kept sipping his drink casually. "Sleep well?"
"Oh yeah. Yeah…" his word lingered as he tried to figure out how to ask what he needed to know. "So… how was your night?" Gibbs only shrugged in response. "Right… um, boss, this may be a very personal, intrusive, even slightly embarrassing question…" Gibbs' slowly put the paper down on the table.
"I'm listening."
"Uh, for lack of better way to word this… what the hell am I doing here?"
A grin broke out across the older man's face.
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"No! You go, McGee! I'm fine riiiight here." Tony slapped the bar top in front of him, ignoring the pleas of his friend to leave with him. "You got your fine bonny lass to tend to, so go to her!" His words slurred and made nearly no sense to the young probie. "Not like I got a lovely lady to go home to!"
"Tony, please, c'mon. You're done." He grabbed his arm and tried to pull him from the bar stool but Tony was being quite adamant. "Tony. Really. You know Abby will kill me if I leave you alone here!"
"I'm not alone! I have Alvin to keep me company, right Alvin!" The bartender turned in his direction and grunted a small laugh. "Really, McGiggle, go, I'll be fiiiine." He took a swig of his beer and roughly slammed the empty mug on the bar. "Play it again, Sam! Er, Alvin!"
Tim knew it was a lost cause. He took out a piece of paper and scribbled something on it quickly and asked Tony for a few bucks, which he obliged to willingly for lack of inhibitions. He asked Alvin for an envelope and put it in Tony's hand.
"Ok, Tony. Tony. Tony!" Getting the senior agent's attention was getting more and more difficult. "Keep this. Alvin is going to call you a cab, and just give this to the driver and you'll get home fine."
Tony waved him off and held the envelope in one hand and his new beer in the other.
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"Envelope? Oh yeah.." Tony recalled finding the empty envelope in his pocket upstairs. "What was in it?"
"You know, Tim, he took care of you." Gibbs tossed the note across the table and waited for the reaction.
'To whom it may concern: My name is Anthony DiNozzo and I am a complete moron. Please deliver me to Special Agent LJ Gibbs…' Tony skipped the next lines of Gibbs' address, 'Thank you and here is money for the ride. Please keep the change. PS: If I act up, please tell me that you'll send the Ninja Chick to kick my ass.'
"Well at least he had fun…"
"So did you, apparently." Tony raised his eyebrows at Gibbs', "You let yourself in and went down to the basement singing Sinatra. When I found you a few minutes later you broke chorus just long enough to explain you were on an epic quest to find the seam in the wall."
A lightblub went on in Tony's head, "oh yeah.. I wanted to see how you got the boat out."
"Mhm." A playful glint stayed in Gibbs' eye, "talked me into telling you, too. Didn't know you were such a good interrogator, actually."
With wide eyes Tony shook his head, inflaming his headache so he stopped, "You didn't!"
"Yup. Figured you wouldn't remember. Good thing you don't."
Tony cursed himself, if not for embarrassing himself than for not remembering how he gets those damn boats out. "But why would Tim send the cabby here? He could've taken me home, or even to his place."
"I called him this morning. He thought it'd teach you a lesson to wake up here."
"It worked." For a few minutes they drank their coffee in silence, Tony's headache subsiding and Gibbs… well, he was just enjoying his agent squirm for his stupidity. "Sorry, boss, I really didn't mean to impose." He stood up, "I'm gonna get my things and let you enjoy your weekend."
"Sit, DiNozzo."
Tony looked back in confusion.
"Sit down, Tony." He tilted his head in the direction of the chair Tony had just occupied. Tony gulped hard.
"Now I'm in trouble aren't I."
Gibbs shook his head, "There were some things you said last night that need to be… reiterated." Tony sat slowly, a look of fear present in his eyes. "Do you remember why you told me you got so drunk last night?" After a moment of silence Tony shook his head. "Do you remember our talk about Paris?"
Tony's mind flashed with pieces of conversation. Gibbs telling him about his undercover op with Jenny. Him telling Gibbs about the absolute comfort and trust Ziva put in him by sharing a bed with him in Paris. And then it hit him. They had a conversation about Rule 12.
Gibbs noticed Tony's eyes flash in a moment of recollection and nodded slightly.
"Do what makes you happy." He stood up and walked towards the kitchen and stopped at the doorway, "just don't play grab ass in the office."
A/N: Not entirely sure how far I want to go with this, I already have chapter two written but not sure if it'll continue past that. Please review if you want me to continue, if not it'll be another scrapped idea, no harm no foul. :)