A/N: Thank you for taking the time to read this JxHQ series. I absolutely love writing it. This is the fifth part of a series and I would suspect I'm about half way through what I'm planning. Since this is a series, I would encourage you to start from the beginning as you will not get the complete picture.
"Do it again, Mista J, I dare ya!"
With that threat The Joker punched Harley in the jaw again and this time she spun to the ground. He was on her in a second, his gloved hands around her slim neck. He closed his eyes for a moment savoring the moment of blissful dominance and gently squeezed until she whimpered. Still giving her enough room to breathe shallowly, he began speaking to her with eyes on hers.
"Sometimes I think you forget who I am, Harley, what I'm capable of. You let your guard down, you stupid broad. I'd think you know better now, but it seems you, ah, need a lesson.", he spoke calmly, but showed no tenderness in his expression.
What started as a simple bicker between lovers about laundry and the fact that she had let it go too long, escalated into this.
Harley clawed at his hands begging for him to release her when he noticed the engagement ring on her finger that he had given not three days ago on her birthday.
"P-Puddin'... please!", she sputtered.
He released her harshly against the floor. Her hands darted up to her neck, rubbing the tender flesh. He was breathing heavy as he still hovered above her. She whimpered at him.
He sighed and sat on the floor against the bed. He held his arms open for her. With tears in her eyes she scrambled to his lap.
"I'm so sorry, daddy. I'll do better.", she croaked through her burning throat. She buried her face in his neck and continued begging for forgiveness in sweet whispers in his ear.
"Okay, Harley-girl. No more tears.", he cooed as he rubbed her back. It wasn't how he wanted to start the day. He would be out until late that night and she would probably be sleeping by the time he got back. Despite what everyone else thought, she wasn't just a plaything to him. She was very smart and she listened to what he had to say. Outsiders had a hard time seeing it underneath her childish demeanor, but he knew the real Harley. She put up with his moods like no one else ever would and she did nothing but feed his ego. She was built like a goddess and it made no sense why a woman as beautiful as Harley Quinn would want to be with him, but she did and she let him know it everyday. Soon she would be his completely. She would be his wife.
He positioned her face in front of his and rested his forehead against hers. She bit her lip as she shyly met his gaze. "Smile for me, Harley." She obeyed, but it wasn't genuine. "Come on, baby, smile. Hmm?" Giving another insincere smile he sighed. "I didn't want it to come to this.", he said with disappointment laced in his voice. She frowned. After a quiet moment he started tickling her sides.
In a fit of giggles she tried to back away. He held her to him as his fingers moved around her body touching all of her hot spots.
"Mista J! Stop-!", her tears changed from sad to happy as her laughter echoed through the warehouse. "I'm gonna pee my pants!"
He was grinning as he slowed the tickling. He pulled her back on his lap and pushed her hair behind her ears gently. His eyes locked onto hers and he gave her a slow kiss. She sighed back into it.
The bedroom door opened and a new young recruit stood in the doorway, "Boss we gotta-". The man was cut short by bullet from J's gun. He ran the hot barrel down Harley's neck, collar bone, and chest and she let out a small moan. "Daddy's gotta go, sweetheart. Aside from your regular domestic duties", he narrowed his eyes at her, "you have one job today: pick out your, uh, dress so we can get this show on the road.", he touched her ring. She giggled and nodded her head. After one last kiss he threw her on the bed and winked. "Don't wait up, pumpkin." As he walked over the dead body and out the door he yelled, "Come on ladies, what are we waiting for?", and Harley heard the mad scramble as he and the henchmen left the house.
In between loads of laundry, Harley was on her laptop looking at wedding dresses. Nothing seemed quite right. As happy as she was that Mista J asked her to marry him, or rather told her she was marrying him seemed almost too good to be true. They hadn't really talked about it since that night on the roof. Even then, the conversation was brief.
"Really, Mista J, ya wanna marry me?"
"It's about time, Harley."
"It's just that we never talked about it before. I wasn't sure if this was something you wanted."
"Well I guess you don't know everything I want, sweetheart
She wasn't really sure what kind of wedding he wanted them to have. It made it difficult to pick out a dress. She sighed and closed the laptop. She had a hard time picturing J at the end of a cathedral aisle waiting for her in a tux as she graced the presence of all their guests in a designer white lace gown.
Who would even be coming to this wedding? It's not like they had much in the way of loved ones. She supposed if he decided to have a best man it would be Harvey. She at least had Ivy and Hope, although neither of them would be thrilled at their union. As for guests, she just pictured rows of henchmen watching them in confusion. Maybe they should just elope in Vegas. She sighed.
Her phone rang. It was Hope. They called or texted almost everyday now. She hadn't seen her since she stayed with her those two days a few months back.
"Hi Hopie!"
"Hey Harl! I'm at lunch and bored so I thought I'd see what you were up to."
Harley still had not mentioned the engagement. She was terrified to tell her and Ivy. She just wanted to be happy and enjoy it a little longer before they inevitably tried talking her out of her blissful state. She decided she should just tell them at the same time. Maybe they'd go easy on her.
"So, I was thinking maybe we could go out to dinner and you could meet my best friend, Ivy. You two are both so important to me and she wants to meet you too!"
"The one J calls a 'weed', right?", Hope chuckled.
Harley sighed, "Yes, that's the one. He just gets jealous that I'm so close with her."
"Does he get jealous of me too?"
"Actually, no, I don't think so. Something about Red really gets to him. It's almost like he thinks I'm gonna suddenly become a lesbian and run away with her. It's so silly. I wish they could get along especially since-", Harley stopped herself.
"Since what, Harleen?"
"Oh nothing. I just want to talk to you about something. I'd rather do it in person."
"Ya ain't pregnant are ya?", Hope asked bluntly.
"Oh no, no, no! Definitely not that. I don't think I can have kids at all. I mean we haven't used any sorta birth control in over a year and we've had a lotta-"
"La la la, don't need to hear it, girl. You keep those juicy little facts under lock and key."
Harley giggled, "Oh alright. I'll call Red and see when she's free and I'll text ya."
"Okay I'm free any night except Thursday. That's date night."
"You have a weekly date night with Matthew?"
"Well yeah. Don't you and J go on dates?"
No.
"Um, well, J can't really go out to date places. We are more, um, homebodies. We have, uh, Tuesday cuddle fest."
"Uh huh."
"Really! Cuddle-a-thons until the morning hours. Just me and my snuggle bear."
Hope cracked up and Harley did too.
"Okay Harl, I gotta go. I'll let you get back to warming up those cuddle muscles, I bet it's gonna be a long night!"
The girls hung up. Maybe I'll see if J's interested in Tuesday cuddle night. It could be fun.
The Joker and his men had a long drive for the job they were doing today. They were being paid for a hit on a dirty cop that had info on the head of Gotham's Irish Mafia. The cop was vacationing in the country with his family, but he wouldn't be coming back.
As J sat surrounded by goons in clown masks, he polished his sawed off shotgun to pass the time.
His mind wandered, as it usually did, to his Harley. She would soon be his completely. He already owned his Harlequin's body and mind and now he would own her soul when she would be his wife. He admitted to himself that he had an obsession with the woman. The thought of another touching her or loving her was enough to make his blood run hot. Was it love, he thought to himself? He didn't know if he was still capable of love after all these years. All that mattered was that Harley loved him. Ha-ha-Harley. The little minx worshipped him. She sat at his feet and listened to his gospel. She gave him all of herself. Every last drop. He closed his eyes and thought about the morning he had with her. She made him feel so many emotions, his Ha-ha-Harley. He wanted to kill her as much as he wanted to make love to her. His gloved hands twitched as he thought about her delicate neck in his strong hands. He could squeeze and squeeze and squeeze until-
"So, uh, boss. The little lady giving you a hard time this morning, huh?"
All the men quickly turned their heads to the young moron who, first, thought he should speak without being spoken to and second, talk about his relationship and third, do any of this while The Joker was holding a gun.
The Joker stopped polishing the weapon and slowly raised his eyes to the young man who was wearing a white and blue clown mask with a red nose. The van was silent.
"It's just that I heard, uh, Harley... sounded like you were, um, hittin' her."
Some of the men looked down knowing they would be cleaning up a mess of brains and blood all night from the carpeted walls and floor of the van.
The Joker chuckled, "Oh you heard that, huh?"
The man felt relieved and chuckled too, "Heh, yeah! Women, am I right?", he elbowed the henchman next to him and the man stiffened and tried his best to not interact.
The air in the van was heavy and tense. The Joker continued to polish his gun again. The van pulled into the expressway and accelerated.
"Are you a relationship counselor, uh, uh-", he snapped his fingers at the young man.
"It's Alex, sir and no I'm not."
"Oh, are we, uh, friends?"
"Um, well, not exactly."
"Hmm, so why exactly do you think I would want to talk to you about how I was, ah, beating my girl senseless this morning? Why would I want to talk to you about how I was squeezing her throat 'til she begged for mercy? Why would you think that if I could do all of those things to someone I, uh, actually care about, that I wouldn't do the same to you?"
Alex was quiet and sweating. The Joker stood up and towered over him and watched him tremble with his hands held up in surrender. He grabbed Alex by the neck and dragged him to the back doors of the van. "No! Wait!", Alex yelled. With one hand he unlatched the door and threw Alex onto the expressway into the cars that followed. Everyone watched as Alex's body bounced and ripped against the asphalt and hit the cars trailing behind, causing a multi-car accident. The Joker closed the door and turned to the rest of the men who all looked away. "Anyone else want to have a heart-to-heart about me and my Harley?" Everyone shook their heads. He sat back down and picked up his shotgun and closed his eyes, resting his head on the wall returning to his thoughts.
After the job was successfully accomplished, The Joker came home well after midnight. He brought Harley some Chinese and came into the bedroom. She was already asleep under the covers wearing her purple lace nightie. He turned on the bedside lamp and started to remove his gloves and jacket.
"Haaarrrrley."
She stirred a bit and then opened her eyes. Her face lit up when she saw he was finally home.
"Hiya, Pud'.", she said in a groggy voice.
"I brought ya a midnight snack.", he set the bag in the bed next to her.
She sat up giggling and started sorting through the little boxes. As he finished undressing he got into bed next to her. He put his hand on her bruised jaw and rubbed his thumb over the ugly purple mark. His eyes trailed down her neck to the thumbprints that were left from the morning. Purple looked so good on her. She looked at him sheepishly and rubbed her cheek on his hand. All had been forgiven.
"What'd my baby do today?", he asked.
"Well I did the laundry of course.", she chuckled. "Then I cleaned up a bit. I took Bud for a walk out back. I looked at some dresses online, but I guess I'm not sure what I'm looking for." She grabbed some chopsticks and started on the chow mein, long tendrils slurped into her mouth.
"What do you mean? Isn't this something all women have thought about since they were little girls?"
"Well sure, but I think the style of the dress depends on what exactly we are doing. Like are we going to a court house or are we getting married in a church?"
He raised one eyebrow, "Obviously, not a church."
"Well, why not? Don't you think that it's important to get married in the sight of God?"
"What god, Harley? I'm your god and I'm pretty sure I'll be there because it's my wedding too."
She frowned because she knew the conversation would go no where so she just nodded in agreement even though she didn't really agree deep down.
"And we aren't going to a court house.", he snorted.
"Well can you just tell me what we are doing? Are we going all out or do you just want to do something small? I know this is your second time around so-"
"Stop right there, little girl.", anger flashed in his eyes. "We don't talk about that. What happened years ago had nothing to do with what I'm doing here with you. Now, I'm open to your ideas, but I have some rules, no church, no courthouse, I choose who officiates, you take my last name."
She looked surprised at the last rule. "Puddin', I don't even know your real name."
"Yeah well, I don't want you to start calling me by it or anything, but I want this to be official. So I'm gonna tell you, but you aren't gonna tell anyone and you will still go by Harley Quinn. Only I will know you're Harleen Napier, Mrs. Jack Napier."
She tried not to get emotional on him for sharing a secret with her. Instead she reached for his calloused hand and held it in hers, rubbing his bloodied knuckles.
"Okay, well since neither of us have many people that would like to attend, how about we just invite a few friends and keep it simple? We could do it on the roof under the stars!"
He smirked at her, impressed that she wasn't pushing for him to spend a hundred grand on daisies. She always surprised him.
"Who's coming?", he asked.
"Well, I figured you'd want Harvey there and I'm only asking for Ivy and Hope and maybe Hope's husband can come too."
He considered her suggestions for a moment. He'd love to see the look on the weed's face when they said their "I do's". He nodded, "That sounds good, sugar. When do you think you'll have this all organized?"
"Oh, um, how about two weeks from Saturday?"
He nodded in agreement. As he settled under the covers, Harley shoved the Chinese cartons back to the paper bag and dropped them on the floor. He turned off the lamp and pulled her close to him. She sighed and rested her head on his chest as she traced her nails across his skin.
"Mista J?"
"Hmm?"
"How do ya feel about startin' Tuesday cuddle fests?"
"Go to sleep, Harl."
"Sweet dreams, Daddy."
That weekend Harley and Ivy planned to meet up in Brooklyn at Hope's house. Hope let the two women in once they arrived and she hugged Harley tight. Seeing her sister's mutilated appearance still shocked Hope. She didn't think she would ever get over how her sister changed.
Hope saw the beautiful redhead watching her intently.
"Sorry for staring," Ivy finally said and chuckled, "It's just like seeing Harley for the first time. Before he got his knife on her." Harley gave Ivy a little shove.
"Oh it's alright, Ivy. I understand. Honestly, I'm not a big fan of my sister's new lifestyle either."
Harley was frowning at the two and began wondering how she was going to get through the afternoon with them ganging up on her.
"Can I get you guys anything? Coffee? Tea?"
"Tea would be great, Hope! Thank you.", said Ivy.
They sat at the kitchen table as Hope put the kettle on. "So, Harl, what did you want to talk about?" Ivy also looked at Harley wondering what her secret was.
"Well, I thought you both should know, um, The Joker and I are gettin' married.", she said quickly.
The kettle began to sing as Hope and Ivy stared at her with surprised looks. Hope reached behind herself and turned off the stove.
"Say something!", Harley urged with her arms crossed. "Just go ahead and let me have it. Let's get it over with. Tell me I'm an idiot, that I'm making the worst mistake ever. Tell me he's abusive jerk that doesn't deserve me! Tell me that he is incapable of loving me! Tell me he's going to end up killing me! Tell me that I'm never going to be happy!", Harley was screaming the last couple of sentences, shaking and crying. She buried her face in her hands and sobbed.
Ivy shifted seats to sit next to Harley and wrapped her arms around her. Hope sat on the other side and rubbed her back and shushed her.
"Harley, honey-", Ivy tried to coax her hands from her face. Harley was red faced and her make up was streaked.
"I'm sorry," Harley said through broken tears, "I've just been so afraid to tell you two. Ive already thought of everything you would want to say to me about this. The thing is, you two are my only friends in the world. It kills me that not one single person will be happy for me because this is the best thing that will ever happen to me. I'm so freakin' happy." The tears started up again.
"Harl, you're right, I'm sure Ivy would agree, that this is not what either of us would have hoped for you. But, this is your life. You have every right to live how you want. If you really want this, you wanna marry The Joker, I'm not going to stop you. I'm going to be there for you every time he breaks you. I'm going to scoop you up and be your cheerleader when he knocks you down. He will hurt you, you know that, but Ivy and I will always be there loving you no matter what."
Ivy nodded in agreement. "She's right sweetie. Haven't I always been your safe place when things get rough with him? That will never change. Now you have Hope back and together we will support you. I will be there for you, always."
Harley sniffed and chuckled, "Well this went better that I thought.", she said as she wiped her tears. Hope brought her some tissues. "Thank you both. I'm not stupid, I know that things aren't going to turn into a magical fairytale after we say 'I do', but he's the only one I want. Our love is something that no one can understand. He's my everything."
Hope and Ivy glanced at each other with sad eyes above Harley's bowed head.
After lunch the the girls moved to the living room and tried their best to hold a decent conversation about wedding plans.
"I found a dress online, it'll arrive tomorrow. I hope Mista J approves. He's not gonna see it till the big day though. And of course... there's still the question of bridesmaid dresses. You will stand with me girls, right?"
The room was silent for a moment when Hope finally spoke up. "Of course, Harleen. We'd be happy to." Ivy nodded.
Harley squeaked. "I'm thinking black. You pick your styles." She reached into her purse and pulled out an envelope of cash for each of them. "Mista J's payin' of course."
The front door opened and a handsome thirty-something man walked in wearing a navy suit and red striped tie.
Hope bounced off the couch. "Oh honey! You're home early!"
The man kissed her cheek and was staring awkwardly at the two women sitting in his living room.
"I forgot to mention that Harleen and her friend Ivy were visiting today.", Hope giggled nervously.
Harley hadn't seen Matthew in almost two years, before she met J.
Harley waved, "Hiya Matthew!"
He walked in the room staring at Harley's radically changed appearance. "Wow, Harleen. You look... great!", he said with a big smile.
Ivy gave a dainty wave and he nodded politely and gave her hand a gentle shake.
"Harleen came by to discuss wedding plans. Her wedding plans.", said Hope trying to convey that he should be cool with the situation.
"Uh, oh! Congratulations Harl! So you and The Joker are getting hitched. Wow!", he was overplaying.
Harley giggled, "Yep, till death do us part and all that!"
"Huh.", Matthew said in a curious tone.
"Yeah Matthew, so don't make any plans for the 24th! You won't wanna miss the wedding."
Matthew slowly glanced at Hope hinting that they needed to talk about this later.