Hi guys, my first fanfiction. This is probably the worst holiday ever so I appologize for the suckish writing.
The next chapters will revolve around Tobi celebrating one holiday with the Akatsuki.
Halloween
Thanksgiving
Christmas
Oh yeah, Black Zetsu is in bold, and White Zetsu is not.
And I do know who the "real" Tobi is. If you've been catching up with anime and manga you should have already known for a while.
This is purely for entertainment purposes when everyone thought Tobi was Tobi.
I appreciate constructive critism, and I'd love to hear how I can improve. That way, I can be a better writer. I appreciate no flames, but if you insist...
This weeks chapter is,
Valentine's Disaster
When Tobi decides to celebrate Valentine's Day with the evil members of the Akatsuki, what disasters will this cause? And what's this? Presents? Read on to find out how the fearful ninja of Akatsuki get embarrassed by an innocent boy only trying to help.Holiday's With Tobi
The Akatsuki…
The organization full of bloodthirsty creatures that showed no mercy.
The name that struck fear into the cold-blooded hearts of grown men.
That's exactly how the leader wanted to keep it.
And that's how he intended it to be forever.
With fear comes peace, he would say.
Until… Yes, until the newest member came. His name was… Tobi.
Pain was satisfied with his current situation.
He was sipping on a pina colada, and writing a blackmail message to the village of the sand.
Everyone was on rest from missions, which made the place a lot louder.
Then again, Hidan was away due to some ritual for his Jasin-sama.
Regardless, everyone else managed to still get into stupid arguments over who gets the TV remote.
Pain shook his head as he remembered yesterdays show.
It was Tobi's turn to pick, and of course they had to watch Barney You and Me and Teletubbies
But that didn't apply to the leader.
Anyone who makes a sound in his office…
Well… he kills them…slowly.
"SEMPAI!" a loud shout could be heard from Pain's office.
His pens fell to the floor, and he tightened his fist in anger.
Pain was about to leave the room to teach that kid some lessons when the door burst open.
"LEADER-SAMA! SEMPAI TRY TO KILL TOBI. TOBI DON'T UNDERSTAND. TOBI A GOOD BOY! TOBI A GOOD BOY!" the swirly-masked member hid behind Pain's back.
A blonde ninja suddenly burst in the room.
"Where is that idiot! I swear I'm going to kill him, un!"
Deidara looked at the leader, and immediately bowed.
"My apologies Leader-sama, but Tobi has really done it this time, un!"
Pain frowned. "Tobi. Don't touch me…ever again."
Tobi apologized and looked down at the floor in shame.
"Sorry Leader-sama… Sorry Sempai! Tobi try to be nice! Tobi is a good boy!"
He looked ready to cry.
"Deidara what happened?" Pain asked.
"I went to my clay workshop today, feeling a bit happy because TOBI HADN"T WOKEN ME UP LIKE USUAL!" the blonde shouted.
Tobi whimpered, and hid behind Pain again.
"Anyways, I went into my workshop, and what did I see? Tobi was messing with my explosive clay! I told him to get the heck out, and put it down, but no… Tobi insisted on making a model. IT ENDED UP ACTUALLY EXPLODING! EVERYTHING IN THE WORKSHOP BROKE! MY LIFES WORK!"
Deidara was practically screaming now.
Tears began to stream out of the hole in Tobi's mask.
"Not Tobi's fault!" he whined.
"T-t-tobi was trying to make Sempai and others presents for Valentine's day!"
A puddle of tears had formed around the three members.
"Valentine's Day…" Pain repeated.
"Listen up Tobi! We are the Akatsuki. We kill the innocent. We burn villages. But…we don't celebrate Valentine's Day!" The leader stared at Tobi for a long time.
There was absolute silence in the room for a couple minutes.
"B-but w-why?" Tobi insisted on asking.
"Because Tobi…" Pain's knuckles were white from clenching them to hard.
"Because Valentine's D-"
Then the door burst open again.
"WHAT NOW?" Pain roared.
Kisame stood at the door, and stared around.
"Sorry Leader-sama, but I was just wondering…" the shark man said.
"Yes?" Pain asked, his patience being tested.
This whole time Deidara was glaring at Tobi, and looked ready to strangle him.
Kisame responded, "Um… Well… Why the heck are the table and chairs, and all the furniture either pink or red?"
"WHAT?"
Pain immediately ran to the Akatsuki's lounge, followed by the other three members.
He just stood there, shocked at what he saw.
A vein throbbed on Pain's neck.
The normal lounge had three sections. An entertainment area, a kitchen, and a living room.
This included a black couch with two blood-red armchairs, dark brown seats with a table, and a television.
There was also Foos-ball and a ping-pong table, which had to be fixed multiple times…
The total cost to make renovations to the original lounge was over 20 million yen!
Kakuzu had been mad about it for over half a year!
But Tobi… He had changed everything!
Pain looked around again to make sure this wasn't his imagination..
The walls were painted a bright pink, and had hearts scattered everywhere around.
That wasn't all.
Tobi had painted every single place he could reach either pink or red.
He was a ninja, so in this case, it was everywhere!
Everything! All the money that had used… gone down the drain. Not only that!
They would have to pay a lot more to get the lounge back to it's original shape!
"Tobi! EXPLAIN THIS!" the leader demanded.
By now, the swirly-masked boy was happy, and he laughed.
"Don't be silly Leader-sama! This is preparations for Valentine's Day! You see, when everyone is asleep, Tobi go buy paint and glue. Then Tobi paint everything red and pink for the next day. Tobi is a good boy!"
Everyone flinched at this.
"Then why the glue?" Kisame asked after a while.
Deidara gasped, and pointed at a figure sitting on the couch.
It was Itachi.
He seemed to be stuck in place.
And he was not happy.
Pain screamed, and went back in his office to get some aspirin.
"Oh that's easy! Tobi didn't think he had enough paint when Tobi left the store. So Tobi buy some super glue that is red!"
"Why didn't you just buy more paint, un!" Deidara asked angrily.
"Oh… Tobi didn't think!" Tobi laughed.
Itachi frowned, and everyone knew it was hard for him to resist killing Tobi.
"FIRST OFF!" Everyone was startled by the Uchiha's sudden shout.
"THE NEAREST STORE IS OVER 100 MILES AWAY! HOW COULD YOU GET THERE IN ONE NIGHT?"
Tobi put his hands on his hips triumphantly and said, "Aren't you proud Itachi-san? Tobi is very smart. So Tobi use Deidara's big birdies to get to the store!"
"WHAT DID YOU SAY?" the blonde exploded in anger.
"Oh… but one of the birdies blew up! Sorry sempai…" Tobi said.
Deidarya was about to punch Tobi, when Kakuzu walked in the room screaming bloody murder.
"TOBI? HOW MUCH DID THIS ALL COST?" Kakuzu asked.
"Um… let Tobi think. Tobi repaid the store manager for everything Tobi broke in the shop… And Deidara's bird exploded, so Tobi had to pay for everything in the store. 500 million yen! Tobi paid him because Tobi is a good boy!" the swirly-masked ninja said proudly.
"WHERE DID YOU GET ALL THAT MONEY?" Kakuzu stormed.
"Tobi get it from Kakuzu-san's wallet because Tobi knows that Kakuzu has an infinite amount of gold. Because Kakuzu-san is a leprechaun! And Tobi is a good boy!" Tobi clapped his hands.
Kakuzu screamed in anger.
Kisame actually smirked.
"Well none of this affects me so… I guess I'll be leaving then."
"Actually Kisame-san?" Tobi said.
The shark man's eyes were wide open in fear at what Tobi could have done.
"Tobi brought you some fresh sushi!"
Everyone stared at Tobi.
One by one, they took out their weapons.
A kunai, Samehada, exploding clay, and a pair of deadly fists were pointed at the lollipop faced member.
"Sempai, Itachi-san, Kakuzu-san, Kisame-san! Tobi has Valentine presents for everyone!" Tobi was jumping up in down in excitement by now.
He pulled out four individual boxes wrapped in fabric painted a rich red and light pink.
The members stared at him as if he was out of his mind.
Deidara was the first to respond. "How 'bout we grab the presents, then beat the living crap out of him, un?"
The others nodded in agreement, with the exception of Itachi (who just said Hn..) and just when Tobi was about to hand them out, someone interrupted.
"What is this?" a familiar voice asked.
The members turned to see the Akatsuki's cannibal with split personalities, Zetsu, the living plant…
"Zetsu-san! Tobi and others are celebrating Valentine's Day! You're just in time!"
Tobi grabbed Zetsu by the hand and led him to the others.
"That's nice Tobi," Zetsu said.
"Touch my hand and I'll eat you!"
Tobi flinched at this, but pretended nothing happened.
"Here are the presents! Sempai gets his first!" Tobi shouted.
"Hurry up with it dweebface, un. We have to kill someone. By someone I mean you!"
Deidara turned around to see who laughed at his joke.
Nobody did.
"All right then. What is it?"
Tobi was giggling in excitement and slowly unwrapped it.
"Tobi knows sempai likes clay, so Tobi gets Sempai Valentine's clay!"
The blonde looked at the present.
"Tobi! This is Play-Dough! Are you out of your mind, un!"
The others were snickering at the joke of a gift.
Even a smile pulled on Itachi's lips.
The funny thing wasn't about the Play-Dough.
Deidara hadn't noticed the clay was pink and red with a picture of Tobi's face!
Kisame was the first one to crack up laughing and he fell on the floor in hysterics.
"What's so funny, un?"
It was at that moment Deidara realized what happened, and screamed.
"You retard! Why did you bring me this clay, un! Get out of my sight!"
Tobi giggled again.
"Aww…Sempai likes the present!"
The others could only watch as the blonde began to shout with anything he could think of at Tobi.
Kisame stood up finally, and looked at Tobi.
"So what'd you get me?" Kisame asked a bit worried after Deidarya's incident.
The swirly-masked member took out the other present.
"This is one is for Kisame-san!"
Tobi slowly began unwrapping the gift, and revealed what seemed to be…
"Tadada! Disney's ultra underwater CD edition!" Tobi exclaimed.
Tobi was practically hopping up and down in happiness.
Kisame was speechless.
"Tobi's so excited! Kisame's too happy for words!" Tobi said.
This time, it was Deidara who was laughing his head off.
"The dimwit got you the freaking The Little Mermaid and Finding Nemo, un!"
Kakuzu was grinning and pointing his finger at the Shark man.
"Keep on swimming, Keep on swimming, Keep on swimming Kisame!" Kakuzu shouted.
Everyone erupted in laughter, and Kisame's blue face turned red.
"Now he's a real Valentine's shark!" Deidarya announced.
Before anyone could laugh, Kisame snatched Kakuzu's gift from Tobi's hand, and thrust it at him.
"Your turn," Kisame snickered.
Kakuzu was still laughing, but now his face turned serious.
After carefully unwrapping the gift, Kakuzu frowned.
"Tobi, what is the meaning of this?" he demanded.
Tobi smiled and ran over to Kakuzu.
"This one made the most sense," the lollipop faced member said. "It's Valentine's, so Tobi got Kakuzu-san an actual heart!"
Everyone just stared at Tobi.
Nobody wanted to ask him where he got it.
They didn't need too, because Tobi told them.
"Tobi would not kill anybody of course. Tobi is a good boy! So Tobi finds the heart in a package out of Leader-Sama's door."
Not a single person in the room was laughing.
"T-tobi. That's Pain-Sama's vessel." Zetsu said.
"He's really going to kill you. No worries, I'll eat the remains."
Clueless as usual, Tobi laughed out loud and said, "You're so funny Zetsu-san! That won't happen because Tobi is a good boy!"
He handed Zetsu's present to him.
"Thank you Tobi," Zetsu said politely.
"If there is anything wrong with this present, I'll eat you for real!"
Zetsu tore through the carefully wrapped fabric, and gasped.
Tobi had bought him a cactus plant in the shape of a heart.
It was half black and half white.
Nobody knew what to say.
It seemed Zetsu was actually pleased by his present.
"Does Zetsu-san like it?" Tobi asked.
"It's amazing Tobi. Thank you," Zetsu said truthfully.
"Not half bad."
Tobi giggled again, and replied, "Glad you like it Zetsu-san!"
The good laughs were over now.
Because the last person to receive a present was Itachi Uchiha.
The man who had killed his entire clan without a second thought.
While they were thinking of ways to kill Tobi if Itachi didn't, they were thinking of ways to survive Itachi.
If Tobi's present was bad, then everyone was screwed.
There were several moments of silence in the room.
Tobi waited for Itachi to come up.
Tobi then slapped his head.
"Oh… I'm so silly. You're stuck there, that's why you can't come up! I mean you'd love to receive a present and all! Tobi is a good boy so he will bring it to you!"
Everyone held their breath as Tobi brought out the smallest box of all the gifts.
Itachi opened the present without even looking at it.
Everyone's eyes grew wide.
They were officially screwed.
Tobi had gotten Itachi contacts.
Not just any contacts.
These contacts were supposed to turn your eyes into hearts.
Now each of them were picturing Itachi's Mankegyou Sharingan with hearts.
This is an S-rank ninja we're talking about.
Itachi tightened his grip on the kunai.
Luckily, Tobi was saved by Pain who came running in the room.
"What is the meaning of this? Where is my vessel?" he demanded.
Nobody said anything.
Everyone's eyes were still wide open at Itachi's present.
Even the leader looked a bit frightened at Itachi's expression.
"Tsukuyomi…Mankegy-" Itachi's began to change color.
Before he could activate it Tobi responded to Pain.
"Tobi took the vessel's heart as a present! I know you won't mind Leader-Sama!"
Everyone knew they were screwed now.
"Duck! Everyone duck, un!" Deidara screamed.
"TOBI!" Pain roared.
The wall exploded in black flames, throwing Tobi back 10 feet.
Even so, the swirly-masked ninja managed to regain composture.
"Happy Valentine's day!" Tobi shouted.
Do you like it? Well, thanks for reading. Reviews are appreciated. I try to reply to all of them! This story wasn't as funny as I was hoping it to be, but the next will be Halloween. They're planning on getting revenge on Tobi for the last Holiday, and are going to scare him.
Note: If you watch or read Katekyo Hitman Reborn!, then you might want to read my other story based around that anime called, "Giotto's Memories".
Thanks,
xDarkTempest