Breathing Space

Summary: Set at the end of 2x14. Tyler tries to say goodbye to Caroline before leaving Mystic Falls and ends up making a promise instead. My first Vampire Diaries fic so be nice lol :P

He stared at the door, willing it to open with his eyes. He knew he didn't deserve more than five minutes in her company, because for all the use he'd been that night, he might as well have tortured her himself. What he couldn't get out of his head was the image of her in that cage, trapped like some sort of wild creature. All he could think about was how it should've been him in there, not her.

What was it about him that meant he treated the girls he liked like crap? He'd cared deeply about Vicki, but had hidden their relationship from the rest of the world, from his parents even, because he'd valued reputation over her. With Caroline, the way he'd treated her had been worse. He'd stood there and watched in a numb kind of terror, unable to move or react to help, and she'd frozen him out of her life because of it.

Well, he was making amends the only way he could. He was going to leave town, learn how to manage the curse properly, and maybe one day, should the desire to come back ever arise, maybe they would meet again and he could apologize for what he'd done – or rather, what he hadn't.

The door opened and Caroline stood there, her eyes tinted with suppressed rage, her lips pressed together in a firm line. She was wearing a blue dressing gown, her hair down, her make up off and the transformation was just…astonishing. Never had Tyler felt so drawn to someone before. In the light of the moon (something he tried to avoid thinking about), her hair glittered like someone had spun it out of gold. And he knew she would never be his for the simple reason he just didn't deserve her.

"What are you doing here, Tyler?" Caroline asked coldly. "I thought I'd made it clear I don't want to see you anymore."

"I'm here to say goodbye," Tyler said bluntly. He shifted on the spot awkwardly. "I'm leaving town. I don't know how long for."

Her face altered into a look of surprise. There was something in her eyes he wished he could make out; it was a form of faint desperation, maybe, or perhaps regret. He didn't want to know what she was thinking, what she was feeling – this needed to be a clean break between them. Any raw emotions left between them would make it hard to leave.

"Why?" she asked quietly.

"To learn how to manage my transformations," he replied honestly. "You have Stefan and Damon to go to for advice. I have no one. Jules is taking me to where there are others like me. They can help me."

"Oh…" Caroline fell quiet. "I suppose that's for the best."

The tension between them was palpable; it felt almost suffocating. He gave her a small smile, which she very reluctantly returned. He saw the betrayal in her eyes and knew it would be a long time before she forgave him, if she ever did. And he understood why. He'd let her down when she'd needed him most, and he could never forgive himself for it.

In an effort to change the subject, he asked, "Why didn't you tell me about Elena?"

"What about Elena?" Caroline asked, puzzled.

"That she has an evil doppelganger and that in order to break the curse she needs to die? Would've been useful to know," he elaborated.

"I've had a lot on my mind," she admitted. "I kept you in the dark to protect the people I love. To protect you. If you don't get that, fine, but I thought you would've tried to help, considering you kissed me and all." There were discernible tears in her eyes. "Talk about sending mixed signals, Tyler!"

"I'm sorry," he said, his eyes downcast. "I know it's no excuse but I had no idea what to do. I still don't know who to trust. I know that sounds messed up, considering you're the only one that's stuck by me. I won't forget that. But you lied to me. And I let you down. We've got issues we need to work through and maybe being apart will be good for us."

"I still love Matt," she confessed. "It's always going to be him, Tyler. You do know that right?"

He walked over to her and, ignoring her protests, stroked her face with a surprising amount of tenderness. She looked up into his eyes and saw nothing but open honesty there. He was opening his heart to her and she realized she was falling for him in the process. He was right though – there were so many issues between them. He would always have that stubborn, unlikable streak to him, which usually made up about seventy percent of his personality. She would always harbour feelings for Matt, and complications would always keep them apart.

"I know," he said, smiling at her. "But you'll always be the one, Car. I've never felt about anyone the way I feel when I'm with you." His smile faded. "I'm sorry I wasn't able to show you that sooner."

Caroline leaned her head against his, her eyes on his. She knew whatever the hell it was she felt for Tyler Lockwood, it no longer belonged in the friendship category. But there would always be so much more than their personal baggage which would threaten to tear them apart. She was a vampire – he was a werewolf. Theirs was a love story which could only be fantasised about, occasionally visited, and nothing more.

"Promise you'll come back," she murmured, her lips only inches away from his. "Despite all the crap you've put me through, I can't imagine you not being in Mystic Falls. Who am I going to protect now?"

"See, that was what was so screwed up," Tyler said wryly, giving her a soft grin. "It was never meant to be you taking care of me. I'm the one who should've been taking care of you."

She smiled, though her eyes were shining with unshed tears. She caressed the sides of his face slowly, somehow unable to get rid of Matt's face which always lingered in the back of her mind. Maybe one day she'd be able to think about one without the other, but for now they both coexisted side by side inside her mind and heart. And one of them was about to walk out of her life, possibly forever.

"I'll keep in touch," he promised. "I can't promise I'll come back soon but I will come back Caroline." He hesitated. "I told Matt to take care of you. I told him you were helping me through a difficult problem and that was the reason why we'd been together a lot. He can look out for you a hell of a lot better than I could."

"He doesn't know about the supernatural though," Caroline blurted out, surprised by her desperation to make him stay.

"No," Tyler conceded. "I know he doesn't." He tucked a stray bit of hair out of her eyes. "But just because he doesn't know what to look out for doesn't mean he won't protect you."

"See, I like this Tyler," Caroline grumbled. "The other one was a pain in the ass, always complaining about something or the other, and picking a fight. Why don't you open up more?"

"Because then my friends will be the ones picking a fight," he pointed out, a ghost of a smirk pulling at his lips.

There was a moment of silence, both of them memorising each other's faces, afraid to close their eyes for even a second in case they blinked and the other had disappeared. Caroline wrapped her arms around Tyler and held him tight, the tears threatening to overflow behind her eyes. This isn't goodbye, she told herself firmly. He'll be back.

Yet somehow the goodbye remained there all the same, the length of its existence undetermined. She wasn't sure how she felt about Tyler; the amount of times he could infuriate her and charm her all in one breath was outstanding. But she knew, putting aside any romantic feelings she may have harboured for him, she would miss him. It would be one less face to see around school, one less smile to deliver, one less friend to comfort and cherish.

She watched him walk away into the night; he spared her only one parting glance because she knew leaving was the last thing he'd ever wanted to do. It was the right thing to do, however; such an observation made Caroline realize she was growing up a little. When you get to the point where you understand and accept a hard decision is the right decision to make, that's when you realize you've grown up and matured a little, she told herself.

And despite the fact she'd once harboured nothing but contempt for Tyler, she found herself standing out in the cold long after he'd disappeared out of sight.