A/N: This is a oneshot that I started writing towards the end of last year (hence the holiday theme) and, after putting it on hold, I have finally finished it. It's not my best work, nor is it very original, but a little Brucas fluff won't hurt anybody, will it? :D That being said, I hope you enjoy it, because I definitely did enjoy writing it.
The title of this story comes from a song by Relient K. Great song by a great band, so check it out if you can!
Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I did, things on the show would be lot different. The title of the story belongs to Relient K.
The Best Thing
Lucas Scott has never been the smartest of men. At least when it comes to his love life. In fact, when he sits down and actually thinks about it, he realizes that he might come off as a jerk to those on the outside who don't actually understand the whole story. After all, his relationships with both Brooke Davis and Peyton Sawyer weren't exactly spread out over a long period of time; he moved on to Peyton only a month after Brooke broke up with him. And later on, not even a day after he broke up with Peyton, he'd almost slept with Brooke. It's that type of behavior that makes him look like nothing short of an ass.
But he's done with that. He's spent most of the past year as a single man - a rare occurrence for him nowadays - and it's put many things in perspective for him. And his biggest revelation is one that might not be encouraged by everyone. They might think he's wrong, that he's just lonely and looking for someone to fill that void, but he knows in his heart that he is right. It's Brooke Davis who holds his heart, and she always will.
During these past few months, she seems to have been all he thought about, but he suffered in silence, knowing he couldn't have her. She wouldn't have let him if he tried. And he did try. Sort of. But it hadn't worked, and that was probably for the best. He had, after all, both proposed and broken up with Peyton the previous day and sleeping with Brooke wouldn't have a good way to get over it. He and her both knew that.
But ever since that kiss that night in New York - the night she was standing by him when his dreams came true - things between them have been different. Not in a bad or awkward way, but rather in a good way. He calls her a lot, more than he ever did before that night, and they've grown closer and closer, to the point that she's one of his best friends once again.
And this is why the moment he hears that Brooke is coming for Christmas, his heart skips a beat. Maybe her return will be their second chance, or rather third, to be together again. He decides to call her right after his mother tells him that she's coming.
"Why didn't you tell me you were coming?" he asks playfully.
"I wanted to surprise you."
"You did, did you? Well, you've already surprised me and trust me, it was a good one."
"I'm glad. I haven't been home in so long."
"I know. Lily's already dying to see you."
"I can't wait to see her either. She must be getting so big. And I really can't wait to get away from this life here, even if it's just for a little bit. It's just so draining.."
"It must be. You're staying at our place, right?"
"Well, I was thinking a hotel-"
"No way, Brooke. You've got to stay with us. You need to be with family for Christmas, not in a lonely hotel room."
She chuckles. "Fine, then, if you insist."
"I do."
And so this is it, he decides. He's going to make sure that he proves to her that he can be the man she needs him to be, that they can be together again. Of course, he'll probably chicken out at some point – he's always been a bit of a coward when it comes to girls – but he hopes to at least get the point across. Because he's not letting go of her again, not for a second.
888
She needs this. She really, really needs this. She needs to go home, get away from her frustrating mother for more than five seconds, be with the people she really cares about, and most of all, she needs to see him. Of course, that is the one thing Brooke Davis will not openly admit to anyone - that she misses Lucas Scott like crazy, that the idea of spending Christmas with him is more enticing than anything.
But she will not let anyone know that he is in fact one of the main reasons she is going home. Not when he probably doesn't miss her half as much as she misses him. And most definitely not when she's just as in love with him as she was two years ago. That's a definite no no. So this will be her own little secret for now.
Of course, though, Rachel figures it out on her own the second Brooke tells her where she's going for the holidays.
"Ah, yes, so you wanna see the boy," she states as she casually flips through a magazine while she lounges lazily on Brooke's bed.
"The boy?" Brooke scoffs. "Who exactly is the boy?"
"Don't play dumb," Rachel says. "Lucas Scott, otherwise known as the jackass who doesn't deserve you. You're staying with him, right?"
"Yeah, so?"
"So, you're still head over heels for him, Brooke. Let's face it, he's the main reason you're finally going home. You don't even have to say anything, I already know I'm right."
Brooke just sighs as she hastily packs her things. Her plane is leaving in only a couple of hours, so she doesn't have much time for Rachel's idle chit chat, especially when the conversation has turned to Lucas.
"The question is," Rachel went on, "what are you gonna do about it?"
This Brooke can answer. "Nothing. I'm going to do nothing."
For a few moments, neither says anything else. Brooke silently looks around her closet for anything else she might need for her week long stay, while Rachel stares down at her copy of B. Davis.
"That's probably for the best," Rachel finally says, "if you want to keep living like this, that is."
Brooke looks up from zipping up her suitcase, eyes narrowed. "What do you mean?"
"I mean that you're not happy, Brooke. Yeah, you've got a lot going for you, and yeah, you probably should be happy, but you're not. And even though I personally think you are way too good for Lucas, I don't think either of us can deny that the main reason behind this unhappiness is that he's not in your life."
"He is in my life," Brooke defends. "He was in town just last month and we hung out. And we talk on the phone all the time. Honestly, Lucas is in my life more now than he was the last few months of high school."
"Yeah, but he's still not here. And most specifically, he's not yours."
"I don't need him to be mine," Brooke says, picking up one of her three suitcases and rolling it over to the doorway. "He's my friend and that's good enough."
But Rachel just laughs and Brooke resists the very powerful urge to throw something at her.
"Just keep telling yourself that, slut, just keep telling yourself that..."
888
When Brooke arrives the next day, three huge suitcases at her side (she claims two are full of presents for everyone, but he's not sure about that), Lucas is the first to greet her.
"Hey, Luke."
He pulls her into his arms, and for a second they just stand there, lost in their own little world. He wonders if maybe this week is his chance. Maybe he can finally get her to believe that she's the one for him, not Peyton, not anyone else.
"I missed you," he murmurs.
"I missed you too." Her lips are right next to his ear, her warm, tantalizing breath pouring into it. A shiver runs down his spine.
"Brooke, you're here!"
His mother comes their way, holding a babbling Lily in her arms. The two year old beams at the sight of Brooke. Lucas doesn't know how his little sister has managed to already completely fall in love with Brooke since she doesn't see her often, but she loves Brooke almost as much as she loves him. Maybe even more.
"Karen!" Brooke cries, pulling herself away from him and walking over to his mother. Karen hands Lily over to him in order to hug Brooke. Sometimes he wonders if his mom loves Brooke more than him too.
"It's so good to see you!" Karen gushes. "I'm so happy that we get to spend Christmas together."
"Me too," Brooke says with a smile. "There's no where else I'd rather be than here, with you guys."
Lily is practically bursting out of Lucas' arms, and she fusses as she reaches out for Brooke. He just laughs as Brooke takes one look at them and then grabs for Lily, immediately pulling her into her arms.
"Look at you, Lily," she says, showering the little girls face with kisses. "You're getting so big!"
"I two," Lily announces, holding up two fingers proudly.
"You're a big girl now, aren't you?"
Lily nods excitedly and Lucas watches in silence as Brooke tells his sister all about the presents she's got for her. It amazes him how great Brooke is with her, or how great she is with kids in general. He knows for a fact that Jamie's just as excited to see Brooke again as Lily is. He can't help but admire how natural she is with Lily. And it's not just that, it's how Brooke loves to be with her. She'd spend the whole day playing with Lily and Jamie if she could, and she probably will now that she had the chance. She's going to make an amazing mother someday and he can't help but think that her future kids were going to be incredibly lucky to have a mother like her.
This thought inevitably leads to him remembering their night in New York a few months ago. Two boys and a girl. And now he's hoping that that will come true someday, that Brooke will be the mother of his children, and he'll be the father of hers. The thought makes him weak in the knees.
He glances over at his mother, who's eyes are on me. She's got that knowing smile on her face, as if she's reading his mind, and he looks away, not wanting her to read him anymore than she already has. He follows Brooke into the living room and watches as she plays with Lily. And he's reassured once again the he's right; this girl is the one for him.
888
It feels so wonderful to be home again. Yes, Victoria will want to kill her when she returns (this is partly Brooke's fault since she hadn't exactly told her mother she was taking a vacation), but it will be worth it. And even though she will never admit it to Rachel, Brooke can't help but admit to herself that coming home did bring out the old her. She is happy here, unlike in New York, where she feels like she goes through everyday on autopilot.
Then there's Lucas. Brooke is extremely thankful Rachel had decided not to join her on the trip or she was sure there'd be many smug looks headed her way. But even though just the sight of Lucas makes her stomach flutter in excitement, she's very certain that nothing will happen.
Still, she feels so unbelievably comfortable around him. It's like they're back to the point they were at years before, when they were juniors in high school and she was falling in love with him all over again. She'd even dare say that their friendship was at the strongest point it had ever been. How they even got to that point, she isn't sure, but she likes it. She likes it a lot. And at the same time, it makes it so much harder to resist the possibility that they could have more than this friendship, that they could be even closer...
She shakes her head at the thought and at that very moment Haley walks back into the kitchen. Brooke smiles at the sight of her old friend. It had been awhile since she'd seen Haley and Nathan, as well as her godson, Jamie, and she hadn't even realized how much she'd missed them all until she saw them again earlier that day.
"Penny for your thoughts?" Haley ask as she takes a seat next to Brooke at the kitchen table.
Brooke smiles. "I'm just thinking about how much I missed you guys."
"We miss you too, Brooke. Can you believe how long it's been since we all hung out like this?"
"It's been since the summer after we graduated," Brooke says with a sigh. "I take credit for that. I haven't really made the time to come home, and I feel horrible about that."
"Well, in your defense, you have been in the middle of building your own fashion empire. And you've done a pretty amazing job, if I do say so myself."
"Still, I don't think that's much of an excuse. You guys are more important to me than Clothes Over Bros ever could be."
But Haley just smiles encouragingly. "Don't feel guilty, okay? We've all been busy. The important thing is we're all here now."
"Peyton isn't," Brooke points out.
"That's right," Haley says, feigning annoyance, "she chose her new boyfriend over us."
But they both know that that isn't really true. There was no way Peyton could have made it to Tree Hill this year; her position as an intern at a record label won't allow it.
"Next year," Brooke says firmly. "Next year we'll make sure we're all together for Christmas."
"Sounds like a plan," Haley replies.
A second later, Lucas swoops into the kitchen, holding a crying Jamie in his arms. Haley stands up to grab him and disappears into the living room a second later. And now they're alone for the first time since she arrived. He sends her a grin as he sits down next to her.
"Having fun?"
"Yeah," she murmurs, "I've missed everyone."
He nods. There's a short silence during which their eyes meet, and suddenly she can't look away. It's like he's got her completely hypnotized. Then his hand creeps across the table to rest on hers and he's opening his mouth to say something and she's wondering if this is it, if she's giving up her resolve after only a few hours in his presence.
"Brooke..."
But then Karen is back to attend to the food that's cooking on the stove and the moment is lost. There's a tiny ounce of disappointment, mixed with the relief of knowing that nothing had happened, that she hasn't yet given in. And even she wishes with everything that it isn't, she can't deny that it's better this way.
888
Lucas feels like he's barely gotten a chance to speak with her in the few hours she's been here. But that's okay. She needs to catch up with his mom and Nathan and Haley, and of course she's got to dedicate some time to her godson and Lily.
It's late by the time Nathan and Haley leave. Karen quickly disappears to put Lily to bed. He and Brooke sit together on the couch in the living room. She rests next to him, a peaceful smile on her lips, and he looks at her, finding himself falling even more in love with her as the seconds tick by.
And then, in a move that takes him by surprise, Brooke's head falls onto his lap. Instinctively, his hand moves to string through her dark brown hair. It's so much shorter than what he's used to. She looks older, more sophisticated with it cut like this. But she's still beautiful. There's no way she couldn't be.
"You tired?" he asks after awhile.
"Mhmm..."
"Alright, well, you're in my room, so..." She begins to protest, as expected, but he holds up a hand. "I'm fine on the couch. I want you to take my bed, no arguing."
"But I love this couch," Brooke says. She stretches her legs, laying flat on her back, her head still in his lap, and stares up at him with a smirk. "I've slept on it plenty of times before."
"Well, not tonight, or any other night for that matter. Besides, I know you love my bed too."
"Oh, I definitely do." Her eyes glint mischievously up at him and he can't help but notice the suggestiveness in her voice. Then she heaves herself up and then turns to him, a soft smile replacing her smirk. "Night, Luke."
"Night..."
She kisses his cheek and he feels a jolt at her touch. This girl gives him butterflies like no other. It should be funny, but really only frustrates him. Because he can't have her. At least not yet. But that will change, and soon, he hopes.
888
She lies awake in his bed, staring blankly at the dark ceiling. His bed. A bed she's slept in many times before, both alone and with him. She has to say that she prefers having him lying next to her, holding her in his arms with the sounds of his soft, reassuring breathes melting into her ear. But instead she is alone, hating herself for wanting him here with her. But she can't help it. She just misses him. She misses them.
It's pointless, really, to deny it even further. She wants to be with him. She hasn't stopped wanting to be with him. Not for a second. But they can't work again.
Or can they? They're young adults now, no longer teenagers, and they've both carry responsibilities that not many people their age have. Who is she to say they couldn't work again?
But then there's the issue of Peyton - the biggest issue, in Brooke's opinion, and probably the only thing stopping her from making a move. Peyton and Lucas broke up awhile ago and neither have done anything to try to get the other back. Lucas constantly denies that he still loves Peyton, while Peyton, who Brooke knows was more broken up about the break up than Lucas ever was, has moved on to someone new. All this together really should make Brooke more comfortable about a possible relationship with Lucas, but then she remembers that according to everyone Peyton and Lucas are meant to be; a little separation won't change that.
But maybe they aren't meant to be. Maybe Peyton and Lucas have both realized that and that's why they're just friends now, rather than back together and in love. Maybe, just maybe, she and Lucas have a chance.
"Aghhh!" she yells into her pillow, completely frustrated about where her mind is leading her. She's going into dangerous territory, a place she really cannot afford to go again, no matter how much she wants to. She and Lucas aren't meant to be, and that's just the way it is.
888
They spend Christmas Eve morning with Nathan and Haley eating breakfast at the cafe. Just the four of them. Sort of like old times, except they're missing one. Peyton's in LA. Lucas heard from Brooke awhile ago that Peyton's got a new boyfriend. It doesn't bother him. Of course Brooke expected him to explode at the news, but he just assured her that he was indeed happy for Peyton.
"So have you met him?" Haley asks Brooke about Peyton's boyfriend.
"No, but I've seen pictures. His name's Julian. They started dating like four or five months ago and Peyton really seems to like him. He's good at cheering her up apparently."
Brooke glances over at him, an odd look on her face, as if she's waiting for some sign of protest. Despite the fact that they've gone through this before, he nods.
"Sounds like a good guy."
"You're okay with this, man?" Nathan asks.
"Of course. You see, and I know this might be hard for you all to comprehend, but I broke up with Peyton, which means that we are no longer dating, which in turn means that she can date other people. So why wouldn't I be fine?"
"Because you still love her?" Brooke suggests.
He sends her an exasperated look. He and Brooke talked about this before a few months ago; the discussion was very short, though, because Brooke refused to believe him.
"No, I don't. I appreciate what Peyton and I had and I always will, but I am in no way in love with her anymore."
"But you broke up like nine months ago," Haley protests. "It would make sense for you to still be a little hung up on her."
He groans in response. How many times he's gone through this with them, he can't even count.
"Yeah, maybe it would, but I'm not. I'm over her. Why is that so hard to believe?"
Nathan and Haley share a knowing glance, while Brooke simply looks away. Okay, so maybe he knows why they find it so hard to believe him. It's mostly his fault. He's never been too good at sticking to one feeling. He normally jumps back and forth with his emotions - one minute it's Brooke, the next it's Peyton, so on and so forth.
So he can see why they think that's what he's doing now. But he's not. For over four months now, he has been sure how he feels about both Brooke and Peyton. The difference is he's in love with one, and not the other. It's not that complicated. Well, maybe it is a little complicated, but he's choosing to just accept how his heart feels instead of what other people are telling him. And his heart is telling him that he's in love with Brooke, and he's not going to let anyone else tell him otherwise.
"Guys, please," he says firmly, "let's just drop this subject. It won't get us anywhere."
"I'm fine with that," Nathan says, grinning. "I've never been a fan of discussing your love life, Luke. It's too damn messy."
"Thanks, Nate," he responds dryly.
Brooke sends him a smile and he sends her a weak one back, wishing that she would just believe him. It doesn't matter what anyone else but the two of them think. But unfortunately she has boarded the Leyton train and doesn't want off. He knows she's only really rooting for him and Peyton for her own protection. She wants to look strong, to be happy for them, but he doubts that seeing Peyton and him together makes her happy, that she really would want them to end up together in place of herself and him. But he can't know for sure, not unless she tells him, anyway.
888
Taking a seat on Lucas' bed, she smiles as she listens to the person on the other line go one about how their own Christmas Eve is going. Her best friend has a day off from work (something that rarely occurs for Peyton these days) and is spending it with her boyfriend, Julian.
"So, it's just the two of us tonight," Peyton finishes, "but tomorrow he invited me over to his family's for dinner."
"Meeting the parents, eh?" Brooke teases. "Sounds serious."
"Actually, I met his parents awhile ago."
"Well, then it's even more serious than I thought."
Peyton chuckles, but when she speaks again, Brooke hears uncertainty in her voice. "I don't know, Brooke...I really, really like Julian."
"And is that so bad?"
"No, but..."
"But you still have feelings for Lucas," Brooke states.
"See that's the thing, Brooke, I don't. I don't have those feelings for him anymore and in a way that feels wrong because...well, I mean, he wrote a book about our relationship, Brooke."
"I know," Brooke replies. Yes, she most definitely does know, and she doesn't exactly like to be reminded of that fact.
"I don't know...it just seems like I'm defying what everyone else expects, you know? Like his book makes it seem like we're some epic couple, that we're meant to be. But I don't feel that way anymore and God knows Lucas doesn't. And the feelings I have for Julian...you're right, Brooke, it's serious. I'm in love with him."
"Wow," Brooke murmurs, "that is serious."
"I know," Peyton agrees. "But the thing is, I've still got people coming at me telling me that it's Lucas I'm meant to be with, that we're just denying how I feel, and how can I possibly move on with that going on? How can I fully commit myself to Julian when he's completely aware that other people think he's just a rebound, including you, Brooke."
"I don't think he's a rebound!" Brooke protests.
"But when you keep telling me that Lucas and I are meant to be, you basically are thinking that."
Brooke rubs her forehead tiredly. Peyton doesn't understand why she feels the need to reassure Peyton that it's Lucas she's meant to be with. It's because she's protecting herself from her own feelings for Lucas and from the desire she feels to be with him again. Because Peyton is the perfect excuse for distancing herself from Lucas. And it's also because Brooke gave everything up for them and what is the point of all that when they don't even end up together? It would have all been for nothing.
But, as Peyton, continues, it seems she might actually have a better understanding of this than Brooke thought.
"Brooke, I know why you're rooting for us."
Brooke lets out a bitter laugh. "You do, huh?"
"Yeah. It's because you gave up your happiness for him and me, and you don't want it to be in vain. And it's also because you're protecting yourself from the feelings you have for Lucas now."
It's like Peyton has read her mind. When did she become so insightful?
"I need you to accept it, though," Peyton continues, "for me and Lucas and for yourself too, that he and I just aren't meant to be. I've accepted that, and so has Lucas but you need to too."
It's not as easy as that, because - not that Brooke needs to remind her - Peyton is known to change her mind when it comes to Lucas. What if Brooke accepts that Peyton and Lucas are over for good and she and Lucas get back together, but then Peyton finds that Julian isn't the one for her and she suddenly decides to come back for Lucas. History will repeat itself. And Brooke can't go through that again.
"I don't know if I can, Peyton."
Peyton sighs. "We really screwed you up, didn't we?"
Brooke doesn't even attempt to lie. "Yeah...you kind of did."
"I'm sorry, Brooke, I really am. What I did to you two years ago...it's my biggest regret."
"It's okay, Peyton..."
"It's not, and don't even try to defend me. What I did was wrong. And now it's preventing you from choosing to be happy with the only guy you've ever loved."
"I don't want to be with him," she mumbles, but it is hopeless lying to Peyton. She knows her too well.
"Brooke, you and I both know that's not true. So can I ask you do something?"
She sighs. "What?"
"Let yourself be happy. None of us can predict the future, but I can tell you that I've learned from my mistakes this time around. I will never put myself above your happiness again. I promise you that. And I can also tell you that I'm a hundred percent in love with Julian. Lucas could come back and beg for me to get back with him, but he wouldn't stand a chance. Does that help at all?"
"I guess..."
"So will you do it?" Peyton pushes.
"I don't know...I'll try."
"That's good enough for now."
She bids Peyton goodbye before staring down at the floor, lost in thought. She isn't sure she can do what's Peyton's asked of her. She wants to, more than anything, because really, she's always hated the fact that Lucas and Peyton were the epic, meant to be couple of Tree Hill. She had to force herself to accept that fact, so why is it so hard for her to let go now? To accept that she's wrong, that she actually still does have a chance with Lucas? And above all, why can't she let herself be happy for once?
"Hey." She looks up to find the object of her thoughts staring down at her, a soft smile on his face. "You were talking to Peyton?"
She nods solemnly, and he sits next to her on the bed. She doesn't make any move to say anything, while he simply observes her for a few moments.
"Are you okay?" he finally asks.
"Yeah, I'm fine," she says with a sigh. "I've just got a lot on my mind."
"And it has to do with Peyton?"
She shakes her head tiredly. "I don't want to talk about this now. It's Christmas Eve and I just wanna relax."
"Okay," he simply replies, and then he covers her hand with his.
Finally, she meets his eyes, and as she loses herself in him once again, she begins to relax. It's as if her conversation with Peyton is a distant memory. And suddenly she is finding it easier and easier to actually accept that Lucas and Peyton are over, that she and Lucas can be together again. Maybe she can finally be happy.
If all it takes is one look from him to get her feeling like this, she knows that she won't last much longer. She wants to be free around him, to not have to worry about the fact that he's the ex-boyfriend that she never stopped loving. But she wants more than that too. She wants to behis girlfriend again, not his ex, and she wants him to know that she still loves him. And after her conversation with Peyton, maybe, just maybe it's finally time he does know that. Maybe she's finally accepting the truth: that she and Lucas are meant to be.
888
As the day goes on and day turns into night, he realizes for the first time that this is really the first Christmas he's ever spent with Brooke. When they were together two years earlier, she'd gone to California to be with her parents (something, he remembers quite vividly, she was not at all pleased about). And any Christmases before or between that time had also been spent a part. Needless to say, he is very much enjoying her presence this year. In fact, he can't remember a past Christmas where he was ever this happy.
He has a feeling this happiness might have something to do with the way her head has been resting on his shoulder for the last half hour, or the way she keeps looking up at him whenever Lily does something cute or funny to see if he's laughing too. Or maybe it's the fact that he's spending this Christmas with the girl he loves. Yes, he is quite sure that is the main reason.
After putting Lily to bed, Karen joins them again in the living room. Lucas is not pleased when Brooke's head leaves his shoulder, but is happy again when she falls back onto the couch and rests her feet in his lap.
"So, Brooke, how's Clothes Over Bros been doing?" Karen asks.
Something comes over Brooke's face at the mention of her company. It's a mixture of both pride and wariness, he thinks.
"Good," she says, smiling faintly. "Really good, actually. Ever since I've gone into business with my mom, the company's been exploding."
"That's great, Brooke," Karen says. "We're all so proud of you here. You've done an amazing thing."
"Thanks," Brooke murmurs. Her eyes stare blankly at the ceiling and he can tell she probably doesn't want to think about work and the stress it brings into her life right now. He's sure his mom sees this too because she goes on to talk about Andy and how he's thinking about moving back to Tree Hill to be with her. This, of course, brings back the hyperactive side of Brooke, a true romantic.
After awhile, Karen announces she is going to bed.
"Merry Christmas, Karen!" Brooke says as Karen makes her way into the hall. A glance at the clock tells Lucas that it is indeed Christmas day. He can't believe it's already half-past midnight.
He looks down at Brooke, who stifles a yawn. He smiles softly at the sight of her, his hands running up and down her ankles, and wonders how it's possible that they can be so comfortable with one another. The way she's so free around him, how she allows him to touch her like this, in such an intimate way, it amazes him. Because he would never have imagined she'd let him do this before she arrived. He'd thought that she would keep a steady distance from him when it came to physical contact. But this...this is too good to be true.
This is also the side of Brooke Davis that he hasn't seen in a long time. The side that rarely comes out these days as her work takes over her life. It's very much the high school Brooke he knows and loves. Cheery. That's the best way to describe her persona of late.
She rolls onto her side, digging her face into the back of the couch, and he's pretty sure she's going to fall asleep here and now.
"Oh, no, Pretty Girl," Lucas says, smirking, "you've got the bed, remember?"
He grins as Brooke lets out a loud moan, and clings onto the pillow in her arms. Standing up, Lucas is very tempted to pull her up into his arms and carry her into his room, but then she sits up at the loss of contact.
"Where're you going?" she asks in surprise.
"I'm not going anywhere. You, on the other hand, are going to my room."
This doesn't please Brooke. A familiar pout forms on her face and he tries hard not to laugh.
"I don't want to sleep alone, Luke," she whines. "Not on Christmas Eve...or should I say Christmas."
What is she asking him? To come to bed with her? That seems too much of a dream to actually be true. But then she answers his unspoken question.
"Sleep with me?"
He cocks an eyebrow, and she laughs, catching onto the double meaning immediately.
"Don't be a weirdo. Sleep with me, as in literally."
Then she completely contradicts herself by sending him a flirty smile that she knows he can't resist. And he doesn't.
"Fine. But only because it's Christmas."
She just laughs as she jumps up and follows him into his bedroom.
888
She has been very daring tonight. She doesn't know exactly what has gotten her to do it, but she has a feeling it was her phone call with Peyton. She hadn't thought so at the time, but now she knows that talking with Peyton, hearing her assure her that she did not love Lucas, that she would never put herself above Brooke again when it came to him, was more than reassuring. It was permission. Permission for her to be with Lucas. Not that Brooke needed it, but she preferred it.
At first, Brooke didn't know if she wanted to take that permission or just ignore it and go on as normal. She was finding it very hard to accept that Peyton and Lucas were over for good. But now, as she lies next to him in his bed, she thinks that she's going to take it. She is pretty sure Lucas wants to be with her again, especially since not just Peyton, but Haley had made it clear that Lucas has feelings for her. Yesterday after dinner, Haley had told Brooke that Lucas point blank had told Haley that he still loved Brooke. So Brooke isn't worried about rejection. No, she's mainly worried about what comes after if they get back together.
Will they be happy again for a few months before it all goes down hill? Or can they actually last this time? She isn't sure. But like Peyton had said earlier, no one can predict the future. So maybe she won't try to get back together with him just yet, but she thinks it's time to start inching closer to him, to make it clear where she stands when it comes to him. But if and when they get back together, they'll still have a lot to talk about. They've got too many issues to ignore. But until then, she isn't ruling the possibility of being with him again. In fact, she is embracing the idea. Because, really, Lucas is the only man that makes her happy. No one else will do for her. So what's the point of rejecting him when he wants to be with her too?
She lets out an exaggerated sigh before turning her head to look at Lucas. He's laying on his back, eyes closed, slow and steady breathes flowing through his slightly opened mouth. She used to love watching him sleep. It always reminded her of how lucky she was that she got to sleep next to him at night and wake up next to him the next morning. But she's having a hard time sleeping herself. It's probably because she can't stop thinking about him. He completely consumes her thoughts, and for once she doesn't mind. Because thinking of him makes her happy. And that's the most important thing; she's sure of that.
In another daring move, she reaches for his hand underneath the covers and strings her fingers through his. She's actually pretty sure that he's awake, which means she really doesn't feel bad when she decides to break the silence...
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"Ugh! I can't sleep."
He can't either. But probably not for the same reasons as her. She's lying next to him, hogging the covers (nothing new there), and every now and then her bare legs graze his own legs (why she insists on wearing shorts to bed this time of year, he does not know), giving him thoughts that he really shouldn't be having. Making matters worse is the fact that in her restlessness, she has began playing with his fingers, something she loved to do when they were together.
He groans as she flicks his nose with her free hand. She knows how to both make him go from crazy with desire to more than annoyed in less then two seconds.
"Luke! Are you awake?"
"Brooke, how can I possibly be asleep with you constantly announcing that you can't sleep?" he says, finally cracking open his eyes to look at her. Through the darkness, he can see her smirking down at him, her face only a couple of inches away. The annoyance has vanished and the desire is back; he's never been more tempted to kiss her than now.
"I really want to open some presents," she simply says.
Trying to ignore his particular urges, he rolls over on his side. "Wait a couple of hours."
"Come on, Luke," she whines, and her hand runs up and down his arm enticingly, as if to sway him. She's good, but he knows better than that.
"No."
She slips a hand the nape of his neck, tickling it in a way he's always loved. "Please?"
But he won't give in. "No."
Then her lips are not even a centimeter from his ear and the feel of her breath is warm and excruciatingly tempting.
"Luke," she murmurs, her voice low and husky, "please."
It takes everything he has not to roll back over and pull her head down to meet her lips with his own. The torture she's inflicting upon him is almost unbearable. He wonders if she has any idea of the affect she has on him.
With every last ounce of resistance he has, he squeezes his eyes shut and shakes his head. "Later, Pretty Girl."
"But don't you want to know what I got you?"
"Yes," he says, chuckling, "but I'll figure out in a few hours, won't I?"
Brooke lets out an annoyed huff. He opens his eyes again and she's glaring down at him. Still laughing, he shakes his head in amusement. She glares even harder, before falling back into the bed and lying on her back. He turns his head to look at her. She's not really that flustered anymore as she stares up at the ceiling with a peaceful smile. She's just enjoying the time of year, and probably most specifically she's enjoying teasing him. But he's just happy that she's happy.
He doesn't even realize he's been staring at her until she points it out.
"You're staring."
He glances back at the ceiling. "Am I?"
"Yeah," she says, giggling, "and shamelessly I might add."
He cracks a smile. "Sorry, it's just..."
"Just what?"
He shrugs. "I don't know..."
But now he's in for it. She shoves his arm. "What, Luke? Is it my overwhelming beauty? Or is there something in my face?" She promptly begins searching her face for anything out of place, and he just laughs before reaching for her hand.
"No, there's nothing on your face, and although you are overwhelmingly beautiful, I wasn't thinking of that."
"Then what were you thinking about? And don't lie, I can read you like a book, Lucas Scott."
He smiles softly, knowing she is right. Then he flips on his side again to get a better look at her.
"I was just thinking about how I haven't seen you like this in a long time."
"Like what?" she curiously asks.
"I don't know...carefree and wild and...happy."
She frowns. "You don't think I was happy when you last saw me in New York?"
"No, no," he defends, before she gets the wrong idea, "it's just that..." He sighs, trying to find a better explanation. "I can tell you're stressed in New York, and I guess that brings out a different side of you, not necessarily uptight or something like that but more...tired."
She doesn't argue with this, and he's sure she probably knows what he means.
"But here," he continues, "you don't have to worry about what other people think, you can just be you. And I guess seeing this old you also reminds me of..." He trails off, wondering if he is going to far. But Brooke, being Brooke, prods him on.
"What? What does it remind you of?"
He's not sure how to answer without sounding too forward or without putting her in an awkward position, so he comes up with the best thing he can.
"High school," is all he says.
"High school?" She frowns, looking at him thoughtfully.
He meets her eyes, and he's wondering if she's thinking of that particular time in high school when they were friends, or rather when they were more than friends. Because that's what this reminds him of. And as her eyes soften and she settles back onto her side tiredly, he's pretty sure she does understand.
"I miss those days," she says.
"So do I."
"We can never go back."
"I know. But we can move forward."
"Yeah..."
He realizes that she's still playing with his hand. Under the covers, her fingers twist softly around his thumb, and his own fingers tighten around hers. Their eyes are still locked, his gaze intense. He hadn't planned on doing this now, but it seems as good a time as ever. He might not get another chance anyway. So he's making his move, knowing that a rejection is highly possible, probably inevitable, but he'll never be able to stand not knowing if there was the small, inkling of a chance that they can be together again.
"I want to move forward, Brooke," he says. "And I want to do it with you."
Her eyes narrow. "Luke..."
"I love you," he cuts her off. He needs to say this, to prove his case before she immediately rejects him. "I don't know if I've ever stopped. I know that you think it's Peyton I'm meant to be with, but I don't want her, Brooke. I really don't. It's you I want. I've always wanted you, and anything less than you is settling."
She doesn't say anything; her eyes just stare intensely up at him. He can just barely make out the tears that well up in her eyes. He's overwhelming her, he knows, but he needs to get this all out before it's too late. Moving his hand to her face, he gently cups her cheek.
"I know this is hard," he continues. "I've hurt you. A lot. And I regret everything I've done to bring you pain, but I hope that you can trust me again someday, and that maybe you can give me another chance. Because I'm done settling. You're still the girl for me, Brooke, and you always will be. So I'll wait for you, forever if I have to-"
But he doesn't have to wait forever because she's pulling his head down to hers, and she's kissing him like she never has before, and he can't remember a time where anything felt so right...
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She isn't sure what's come over her, but she can't help herself. She loves him and he loves her. That should be all that matters, right? It should be, but it isn't. They'll sort out the trust issues later, though, because now is the time for her to let it all go. It's time for her to forget the past, and focus on her future. And she wants her future to be with him.
And now, as she kisses him for the first time in so long - that brief kiss in New York is a distant memory - she is finally accepting what she really has known all along: he is the only one for her. She can search all she wants for someone to replace him but it will all be in vain, because Lucas Scott owns her whole heart. He always has and he always will.
After a few moments, Lucas pulls away. His body pins hers down, one of his hands stroking her face while the other hold himself up. His eyes pierce into hers, and she can tell he is anxious that she's going to fight him and tell him that the kiss was a mistake, that she doesn't want to be with him. But she's going to surprise him today. She's done fighting. She just wants to be happy.
"I love you too, Luke."
This seems to release all tension. A goofy grin erupts on his lips, and soon he's showering her whole face with kisses, and she just laughs, letting him do as he pleases. They both have a lot to talk about, many issues to sort through. It's not going to be easy, but they'll make it through. She's sure of it. Today, though, she will let them enjoy a peaceful Christmas day and tomorrow they'll really begin moving forward.
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When he wakes up that morning, she's laying in his arms. Placing a sweet kiss on her cheek, he then props himself up on his elbow. She stirs a little before cracking open one eye.
"Hey..."
He grins down at her and grazes her cheek with his thumb. "Merry Christmas, Pretty Girl."
She smiles sleepily. "Best Christmas yet," she mumbles.
"How can you tell? The day has only just begun."
She just chuckles before leaning up to place a kiss on his lips. "That's how I can tell."
He laughs. "Hmm, yeah, I think you're right, then. This is definitely my best Christmas too."
He falls back down next to her, and she twists around so that they're face to face. He slings an arm around her waist and they spend the next few moments in a comfortable silence.
This is perfect. There is no other way to describe it. Here, with Brooke, is where he's supposed to be. Unable to help himself, he kisses her again before speaking.
"Brooke?"
"Hmm?"
"I just want you to know that this is it. You're it. I'm not letting you go this time around."
"Good." She smiles and reaches for his hand. "Because I'm not planning on letting you go either."