With one last fleeting glance, Santana walked away and into the nearest classroom. She could no longer look at the blonde, her heartbroken expression killing the Latina inside. How could she have hurt Brittany like that? Her hands clenched, turning her knuckles white as her nails bit into her skin. Just a few days ago, she saw her best friend cry, completely furious that Artie was the one who caused it but, at the same time, more furious that although she had never seen it, she was sure she had caused Brittany much more pain than the stupid wheelchair kid. Brittany was always a naturally happy person, rarely letting anything past her wall of optimism. To see her cry would break anyone's heart, let alone Santana's.
"San?" a small voice called out, immediately snapping Santana out of her thoughts. She knew that voice clearly and hearing it only caused her heart to break again. Santana had hardly noticed she was crying until now and hurriedly wiped away her fallen tears, not wanting the blonde to see her this weak- although she highly doubted that Brittany would fall for her facade. Her best friend knew her best; Brittany liked to think she knew her better than Santana knew herself.
"What?" the Latina muttered, her voice sharp, hoping the coldness would scare the blonde away. Brittany shook her head and approached Santana, placing a hand on the shoulder of the girl facing away from her. Brittany wasn't mad; she was disappointed. The blonde knew that Santana loved her, not Karofsky and one stupid interview with Jacob wasn't going to change that. Still, those words stung. It was one thing to confirm that she loved Dave, it was another to agree with the term 'soulmate'. Brittany might not have had a large vocabulary but even she knew what that term implied- that the two were made for each other.
What if Brittany was wrong? What if Santana had fallen for Karofsky after all? At that thought, she quickly withdrew her hand, holding it close to her chest like it burned. "Did you really mean it?" she asked, her eyes now trained on the floor, unable to look at the Latina. Santana turned around and raised an eyebrow at Brittany, her tear stains slightly visible but not enough for the sad blonde to catch on to. "Do you really think you and Dave are soulmates?" she continued, her voice getting weaker. Santana didn't know what to do. She figured after the interview, Brittany would drop the subject and her alone but recently, Brittany's persistence was growing.
"Yes, I-" Santana couldn't finish, noting the girl's posture. Brittany's head was down, her eyes were glued to her feet and she was practically shaking in fear at Santana's next words. Again, Santana was left confused at what to do. Her resolve was completely gone now that she was face to face alone with the person who would receive the blunt of her actions. "Britt…" she started, walking towards the girl and placing her hand under Brittany's chin, lifting her head. The tears that were glassing the blonde's blue eyes further pained Santana. How could she lie when Brittany was in tears? "No," she whispered, keeping her eyes connected with Brittany, hoping to show her sincerity. She could lie to the world but she could never manage to lie properly to her best friend; to the one she loved.
"Why?" Brittany asked, her tone a bit more firm. She did not understand why Santana continued to do this. One moment, she would be confessing her love for her and the next she would be cold and hurt her. None of this made sense. They loved each other, why couldn't it be that simple? "Why did you lie?" she added. Santana knew her reason clearly but no matter how many times she told Brittany, the blonde would never get it. Brittany would never understand her fear. The blonde didn't understand the consequences.
Santana looked down as she formed her resolve. "After prom, Britt," Santana whispered, breaking the silence. Santana needed to win Prom Queen. She hoped that the title would give them the security they would need to be out in the open. She cast one last glance at the blonde again before leaving the room and leaving the blonde more confused than before. After prom.