Carpet Bugs

A/N: This was a challenge on the Jack and Sam pad hope you all enjoy.

"They're never going to believe it sir."

"Why would we lie Carter, it's a reasonable explanation. You worry too much."

I could hear her sigh in the dark.

"I worry about what's going to be said. I don't like being part of the Mountain's gossip. It's bad enough already. There been rumors about us since the first day I walked into the SGC. Did you hear the latest? I'm supposed to be hiding your love child in San Diego and my brother Mark is raising it. Oh Congratulations it's a girl! I don't know where they get this stuff but I don't want to give them anymore fuel for the fire. I don't think anybody's going to believe this and when they find us like this they're not going to believe us?"

Sam got up and walked to the other side of the room. He could hear her scratching.

"Carter don't scratch anymore you'll scratch it raw. I know I'm dying to do the same but I'm trying hard not to give in to temptation but it will only make it worse."

"There never going to believe the story it's just not possible that bugs could eat through our clothes and leave these marks."

"We'll take one of them back with us and that will be our proof."

Jack heard her sigh againandhe wentto the other side of the room.

It had been his ideal to wander around the ruins. Sam had finished her sample collections and had volunteered to come along. SG5 had all stopped what they were doing and stared at them when they walked away. Jack could only imagine what was said once they were alone and now they had been missing for hours there imaginations must have gone into overdrive.

Jack had stepped on a stone that gave way to a sliding wall and they both had been pushed into the room they were in now. It was dark and bothhad lost there torches and their flashlights were left with there packs.

With a sigh he said he was sorry that she had gotten stuck with him here. She didn't answer.

He had secretly wished that she had not heard any of the gossip that had been circulating at the mountain and had silently promised himself that he would look into the worse offenders which just happened to be the team they had been assigned to watch. SG5 had needed Sam and Daniel to help them gather information and now they were in this predicament it was bound to make it to the rumor mill by the time they left the infirmary. He needed to protect Carter and if they didn't have anything better to do then spread malicious gossip then maybe they should be reassigned to Antarctica.

He spoke softly. Not wanting to upset her anymore then she already was.

"We are officers in the Air Force we know the rules and we would never step over the line. No one should ever question your character and your conduct Carter you are the best example of an officer that stays inside the lines, follows the rules and we're lucky to have you in defending the earth."

"Thanks sir I shouldn't let things like that bother me but I just hope General Hammond believes us."

"He's a fair man Carter and he will believe us. He doesn't believe any of the stories I'm sure he's heard them all. So what's the name of my little girl Sam and when did we have the time to conceive her we're so busy saving the planet and stuff I must be a real stud to get you on the first try."

Carter gasped then started to giggle.

"Hey what did I say about giggling?"

Carter started to laugh out loud.

He was smiling now knowing she was starting to relax.

"I should have just listen to you and not want to wander around the ruins I'm really sorry Sam and if it was just Teal'c and Daniel with us we wouldn't have to worry about anything. Just our rotten luck to be on a mission with the biggest mouths at the SGC."

Before Sam could answer they heard there names being called.

"Saved by the Calvary," Jack said.

Sam snorted and came to stand next to him. She grabbed his hand and waited.

"Well if they don't believe us then we are screwed sir."

"If you keep worrying about little things like this then your gonna get wrinkles on that pretty face of yours."

"What!"

"Jack Sam are you in there hey can you guys hear me?"

"Teal'c Danny were here but you guys are going to have a bit of trouble with the door and when you do get it open close your eyes and watch out for the bugs they're in the carpet and just waiting for their next meal."

"Bugs, Jack what bugs."

"Carpet bugs Daniel were in a room with a bunch of carpets and they happen to like me and Carter and decided to feast on our clothes since the carpet seems to be to thick for them."

"So you're saying these bugs eat fabric? How about rubber like your shoes or how about solid..."

"Ack! Daniel get us the hell out of here and you could ask them yourself."

Jack closed his eyes and started to mutter under his breath and felt Sam squeeze his hand and whisper, "patience sir".

I started to count to 10 backwards and she snorted.

"Sir you shouldn't have said anything about the bugs let him find out for himself."

"Carter you do have an evil side to you. I like it!"

The door was blasted open by Teal'c. Jack pushed Sam behind him wanting to keep her out of there sight.

The bugs started to scatter in the light.

"Jack? You were kidding about the bugs right?"

Daniel flashed his light at Jack and was surprised.

"Ah Jack you don't have anything on. Hey Sam you must be in the same boat huh and what's all the marks on your body they look like…"

"Daniel Jackson I believe O'Neill is trying to keep his temper so I suggest we hand them over our jackets so they can get to there packs to retrieve there extra clothing."

Sam head bumped into The Colonel's shoulders he could feel her hair brush against him that made him shiver.

Teal'c handed his shirt to Jack who handed it to Sam and then Teal'c gave him his jacket. He tied it around his waist and Daniel was in the process of picking one of the bugs up with tweezers to put in a jar.

The came out of the room and into the light. Jack looked down at himself and swore.

Sam looked at him and her hand flew to her neck.

"Yeah that's what I was trying to say those marks on each of your necks look like hickeys"

Could this day get any worse.

"Come on lets get to our packs before SG5 get here and make this situation worse Teal'c put the door back into place I don't think the little buggers like the light so that should keep them in."

The made it back to base camp but SG5 was no were around. Jack changed into his clothing and pulled out a mirror to see the damage.

It was not good they did look like hickeys and since they were alone the rumors were going to fly.

Sam changed and didn't look good. She was thinking the same thing he was he was about to go over to talk to her when the radio came to life.

"Dr. Jackson this is Dr. Orr we've found no sign of Colonel O'Neill or Major Carter but we've come across a room with tapestries and carpets but they are infested with bugs."

Sam, Jack and Teal'c all looked up and walked over to Daniel.

"Dr. Orr don't touch the carpets I repeat do not touch or move the carpets."

"Why they're harmless."

"No! Beware of the carpet bugs."

Sam smiled and turned to Jack who smiled back knowing everyone would believe their story now.

He pulled her to the side and said, "feel better?"

"Yes and no think of what we could have done and we wouldn't have been under any scrutiny and think we could have started on our second love child."

She walked away and Jack just stared at her leave with a sway of her hips. She turned around and caught him looking.

"Oh by the way her name is Hope."

Jack let out a doh and said, "Damn bugs."