Disclaimer: I don't own Saw or it's characters. This is only for laughs, so enjoy!
"Ready," Amanda said to Mark Hoffman. The two Jigsaw accomplices were on either end of John Kramer, preparing to lift him off his medical bed and into a wheelchair. "One, two, three!" They both heaved John up, quickly lowering him into the chair. Mark glared as Amanda pulled the wheelchair around to face the barren stone hallways. They weren't on the best of terms, always trying to outdo themselves in front of John just to see which one was worthy to really be his accomplice. "I've got it," Amanda muttered darkly to Mark, who ceased his attempts to steer the wheelchair and stepped aside. Amanda pushed the chair down the gloomy hallway in silence. They all came to a stop when they reached a woman on the floor. She had long, dirty blonde hair that fell to her shoulders. The mane of hair was underneath the woman's body, which was sprawled on the concrete ground. Her arms were at an angle, as were her legs. The slow falling and rising motion of her chest betrayed the fact she was alive.
"There she is," Mark said to John. "Danica Scott. What do you want us to do with her?" John looked uncomfortable. He scratched his chin and shot a glance at Amanda. She raised an eyebrow. "Well…" John started, clearing his throat in a self-conscious fashion. "First she needs to be stripped nude." Mark choked on laughter, turning away to hide his amusement. Amanda giggled, covering her grin with a hand. Even John allowed himself a small smile. A few seconds passed by when Mark and Amanda's laughter died down. Mark's smile fell from his face when he asked, "Wait…You're serious?" Amanda's eyes went wide as she understood the look John cast her before. John nodded. "Oh, no! Oh, no, no, no!" Amanda protested. "I am not going to do that. Ugh. No." Mark ran from the room in hysterics, and crashes were heard from in another chamber. Mark seemed to be rolling on the floor and knocking down torture items. His laugh boomed and echoed down the halls.
"Amanda…" John warned, his tone cautious. "Make Mark do it!" Amanda whined in horror. The crashing stopped and Mark re-entered the room glaring. "Amanda, I'm a guy. I'm not going to do it. Besides, it's nothing you haven't seen before plenty of times" Mark added. That pushed Amanda over the edge. "Plenty of times?! What the hell is that supposed to mean?!" Mark stepped back as Amanda advanced toward him. "Well, what I'm trying to say- Amanda! Hey! I'm trying to tell you that you're a woman and it's nothing you haven't dealt with before! And god knows what you did for heroin in jail-" Mark didn't get to finish. Amanda threw herself on him, punching every bit of him she could find. "Hey…" John tried to shout weakly, but the two were too engrossed in wrestling each other to listen. "HEY!" John cried. He immediately pulled on his oxygen mask before the yell robbed him of his strength. Amanda and Mark snapped their heads toward them, pausing from their fight. Their pose was almost comical.
Amanda was grabbing Mark's shirt and her fist was poised above her head, and Mark had his face craned away from her fist, his hand around her neck. They both were on the floor next to Danica. "Up," John instructed. Amanda and Mark glanced at mark, then to themselves, quickly scrambling upward and away from each other. "Now I don't want any more fighting, you hear? Amanda, you will undress Danica. And Mark, you will transfer her into the freezer room. Got it?" John said firmly. Amanda nodded unhappily and pushed John back to his medical bed. She later joined Mark next to Danica. They stood there a while in silence, shifting in place awkwardly. Finally Amanda muttered, "You wanna undress her?" Mark stared at Danica. "So much"
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