I don't own the characters or anything else..

Summary: Don feels hopeless. Colby shows him he cares. Slight slash and maybe established relationship. reference to Don cutting and thinking of suicide.

Don parked his car on a cliff that had a spectacular view of the whole city of LA; most of it anyway. It was midnight and Don couldn't sleep so he came out here with a bottle of Jack Daniels trying to drown his sorrows of the last case that didn't go so well. They didn't get to the girls in time, all because of him. He was responsible for causing (however indirectly) the deaths of the three little girls who hadn't even had the chance to live. He took a swig straight from the bottle, and felt the alcohol numb his pain a little. He didn't do this often, come up here in the middle of the night and try to forget that he had the world's worst and best job at the same time; try to forget about one of the worst cases of his career.

He forced himself to take another sip from the bottle, even though he knew it wouldn't do him any good, he was too upset to get drunk. Right now, he felt like curling up and crying in a place where no one would see. But he couldn't do that, he was supposed to be brass-balls Don Eppes. He wasn't supposed to get drunk just to forget the horrors of the day. So he drank deeply again from the bottle and then threw it out the car window. He hated this; he used to be able to deal with the pressures of the job, but now…..

He turned on the radio for background noise, because to be honest, sitting alone in the dark was starting to creep him out. He heard a melancholy tune and it made him think of foggy graveyards and tortured souls.

Suicide is painless
It brings on many changes
and I can take or leave it if I please

The game of life is hard to play
I'm gonna lose it anyway
the losing card I'll someday lay
so this is all I have to say:

Huh, Don thought, never heard that before. It somehow described how he was feeling; if he was going to die anyway, he'd rather it be by his own hand than by the bullet of some crazy son-of-a-bitch.

Deeming he was sober enough, Don drove back to his apartment and did something he hadn't done since his days playing minor-league baseball. He sat in the bathroom, on the ledge that the bathtub provided and cut into his wrist with a razor blade. Don immediately felt the pleasure that the alcohol couldn't give him. It stung, but in a good life-affirming way. It made him feel alive and not like the mechanical robot he had been feeling like the past few weeks. Craving the feeling again, he sliced horizontal cuts up and down his forearms, the blood cascading to land in a puddle on his jean-clad thigh.

He sighed and thought back to the song he heard in the car, what was it about again? Oh yeah, suicide. Don sat there and thought how easy it would be to just dig the blade in a little deeper and he would never have to deal with the pressures of the job again. His mind turned to who would miss him. Charlie was busy with Amita; Dad could finally focus all his attention on Charlie. David would finally be able to take over as SAC after Don was gone and he probably wouldn't be so hard on Colby. He didn't have a girlfriend recently and Don realized that he had never felt so alone. He turned the blade so it lay vertically along his forearm. He was just about to press the blade into his skin when his phone rang loudly. He opened it:

"Eppes," he said his voice a little hoarse.

"Hey, Don. Sorry to call so late," Colby's voice sounded cautious, it was well after midnight at this point.

"Not a problem, what is it, Colb?"

"Nothing, just couldn't sleep," he took a pause before asking "Hey, do you wanna come over and watch a movie or something?"

Don knew they had work tomorrow and it would be a bad idea to stay up so late, but he felt like he needed someone right now.

"Sure thing, Colby; I'll be over in ten."

Don cleaned up the bathroom and used some hydrogen peroxide on his cuts. He wrapped some gauze over his forearm and after changing his blood stained jeans, slid a long sleeved shirt over his head.

He arrived at Colby's apartment exactly ten minutes later. He and Colby silently made their way to the couch and sat down.

"Top Gun or Dirty Dancing?" Colby asked.

"Dirty Dancing," Don replied.

Colby popped the disk into the DVD player and went down the hallway for a short time before he came back with a large blanket. He sat down and draped it over himself and Don. Don muttered his thanks and settled back to watch the movie.

In truth, Don stopped watching the movie after Baby was carrying watermelons. He was more aware of the fact that Colby had fallen asleep with his head on Don's shoulder and was making little sleep noises. Don thought it was kind of weird but was enjoying that someone was thinking about him enough to draw comfort from his presence. Maybe he shouldn't have tried to kill himself earlier. Now the thought disgusted him, how could he even think about leaving when he had a wonderful team and a great family?

"Hey Colb?" Don said softly.

Colby groaned to let Don know he was listening.

"You're a lifesaver"

Colby grumbled something and snuggled deeper into his shoulder, his arms looping around Don's waist.

Don felt himself falling asleep after that, just as the movie was ending and Colby's head fell into his lap. He stroked Colby's soft hair and rubbed his back laughing softly when the ex-soldier inhaled deeply and started snoring so lightly it could be mistaken for loud breathing.

How could I ever think of leaving this? Don mentally kicked himself before his eyelids became to heavy and he started snoring softly too.

So...what did you think? If you loved it, hated it or anything in between let me know and review! BTW should there be more chapters? A sequal maybe? I'll work on it. But in the mean time...the review button is right there.