Pairing: Wishshipping, Yuugi x Jounouchi
Premise: Yuugi and Jou have been together for a while and fooled around a few times but never actually 'done the deed', if you will. Yuugi was excited about the idea of it at first, but then his doubts start getting the best of him.
Summary: [Post-canon, AR, M/M, Lemony] The first time is not always the best time.
Continuity: A mix, as usual. I really am fond of Jounouchi's English voice but I don't like compromising by adapting things to the entire English anime, haha.
Notes: Awkward sex for Yllimilly, because she's wonderful and gives me attention and love. We were discussing Wishshipping, so that's what I'm going with.
I have to tell you, it's really hard for me to write PWPs without *any* background behind them at all. It feels kind of cheap to me, like a bit of a cop out. Pillow Talk was the first true PWP I've written for YGO and that went over pretty well, so hopefully I can get the hang of it. Just drop a review and let me know what you all think. Feedback on the interaction would be particularly helpful, if you're so inclined.
Warnings: None~
"Ew, Jou, take it out," Yuugi protested. Arms outstretched, he pushed Jounouchi back and frowned. "I'm not gonna kiss you if you're chewing gum. That's weird!"
The two were hanging out at Jou's apartment. Yuugi wasn't the biggest fan of the old, messy space; there had never been a time he recalled when it wasn't messy. Junk littered the floor, from used tissues to dirty clothes and spilled food. Things that seemed to burrow into nooks and crannies, strange textures that would creep onto exposed skin. It was repulsive. Jounouchi's room was the only relief, spotless by comparison. It was small and cramped, closer to a closet than a bedroom, but there was barely enough space for the both of them in it.
So the living room it had to be.
The den consisted of a couch that cracked and creaked when anyone sat on it, as well as a leather chair. That chair was considered Jou's father's "spot". Although Jounouchi himself had no trouble cursing the man while lounging in it, the image of an enraged father was enough to keep Yuugi well away from it. No matter how often the two of them talked, or dueled, or held each other on that couch, Yuugi never felt comfortable there.
There were days that Jounouchi and his father fought, days where he would turn up to school with bruises. It hurt Yuugi to see them and, considering that this place was likely where he'd gotten them, gave him an uneasy feeling whenever he stepped inside. Spending time at the Game Shop was difficult because his grandfather was always hovering, but Yuugi felt better there. Jou held a sort of pride in being without constant adult supervision, though, and it was difficult to insist on leaving without insulting him.
Jounouchi rolled his eyes, a roguish smirk spread across his face. He loomed close. "You don't think it's kinda sexy? Like, what if when we're done you're chewing it instead?"
Yuugi knew the expression all too well; the familiar tug of those lips had been the start of plenty of shenanigans.
"Yuck." Shaking his head, bright eyes shut themselves and he grimaced.
"I dunno what the problem is. We swap spit anyway, right?"
He supposed that it was true. "I guess."
Saliva swirling around in their mouths wasn't what Yuugi focused on when they were together. The environment wasn't helping. A single glance around the room was all that it took to remind him that this was not the place to comfortably talk about bodily fluids.
Some small object in the room squeaked or crunched, and Yuugi hastily turned toward the apartment door, heartbeat quickening. Jou's place wasn't where he wanted to be, and nearly every sound could have been a sign of Jounouchi's father returning home. He'd seen it before.
The door would slam open, the man entering carrying a sullied bag that looked as though it had been rolled in dirt, his clothes disheveled and ill-fitting. He would shout about being hungry and then complain about his day, regardless of if anyone listened. If Jounouchi hadn't taken time to make dinner and he had company, Yuugi had exactly 3 seconds to get moving towards the door before the nearest object was scooped up and thrown in his direction.
"Stop worryin' about it," Jou told him, and rough hands clamped down firmly on his thighs. "I toldja, he ain't comin' home 'til late. Real late. You won't even be here."
Although Jounouchi was smiling, lips quirking at the ends as they tended to, something was desperate about the way his eyes gleamed.
Yuugi's face was immediately conquered by a blush.
Sighing, he tried to suppress his paranoia. He felt like a pervert, not being able to be modest when it counted. What was it about the idea of sex that got him going? He tried to rationalize his thoughts. It wasn't any different from going to school or doing homework or dueling. All of the emphasis was in his head, he told himself.
None of that helped at all. Molten lava still flowed through his veins, still set his face on fire and threatened to melt him from the inside out. He didn't want Jounouchi to think that he wanted it that badly. The more he tried to push it away from his mind, though, the more determined those thoughts stay put. It just didn't feel like it was the right time, sitting there on Jou's couch. The idea of it nearly caused him to gag.
Yuugi had always been very cautious about when and where the two of them were allowed the express affection for each other. There was just too much pressure from everyone, and having their relationship be publicly known wasn't something that he felt capable of handling. The possibility of being viewed as a queer bothered him greatly. Dating his best friend wasn't strange at all!
Anzu still went out with some of their old classmates, and so did Otogi. Both of them were good looking and none of them had trouble finding partners. Honda and Shizuka had hit it off well from the beginning. None of them were never questioned or pestered about who they were seeing, and Yuugi wanted much of the same for himself. He wasn't ready to sit down and have a conversation with his friends or with his grandfather. It wasn't necessary.
Jou didn't want to talk to anyone about their relationship, either. He would rather let actions speak for his feelings, and he didn't seem to care about anyone else understanding how he felt. When the two of them managed to sneak away their small, intimate moments almost always turned into heavy petting sessions.
Somehow he always knew where to touch or tease, knew just how to go about chipping away at Yuugi's resolve. Jounouchi used to beg; there were never any doubts to be had about what he wanted.
There was something appealing about the primal way that Jounouchi would look at him; it had never failed at turning him on. Kisses between them were always rough and full of hunger, and it was intimidating for Yuugi to see and feel how badly another person desired him. The idea of someone holding themselves back for what they thought was a worthy reward, especially when he himself was the prize, made him feel important and sexy in some strange way. He liked the idea of someone earning him. It was selfish and low, but Yuugi endured.
Not that Jounouchi was at all modest or patient; he waited in his own way. After having been told no (several times), Jou held himself back. Occasionally there was grumbling, but no more pressure. No more petting. They digressed to kisses, necking and a few gropes, and Yuugi tried to be stricter about his boundaries.
When lips closed over his throat it took every muscle in Yuugi's body to stop the accompanying shiver. His hands immediately moved between his legs; it shouldn't have been so easy to get a rise out of him.
A chuckle reverberated against his skin. "Mmm… ya don't hafta do that, y'know ...not today."
Amethyst eyes nearly rolled back at the sensation.
It's habit, Yuugi wanted to say, the promise of the day forgotten in favor of routine. Instead he remained quiet and focused on breathing; he'd forget to do it if he didn't think about it. Jounouchi being pressed against him had that effect.
"You're so tense, Yuug'. What's wrong?" Jounouchi pulled back, sitting on his knees. "You nervous? 'S not a big deal."
Yes, it was, and Jou would never understand that.
Jounouchi had always been the sort of person that Yuugi wanted to be, at least socially. He was the type of man that said what he wanted, did what he wanted, and seemed to only attract people who could appreciate that kind of honesty. Even Yuugi was enthralled by it. He loved knowing that he was always getting 100% Jounouchi, regardless of the situation. It meant that when Jou had picked him and said that they could date, he had really picked Yuugi - and that made him feel desirable.
Yuugi found it difficult to push himself to be that honest, especially when his words could inconvenience someone else.
"I just... I don't know anything about this stuff, Jou..."
Nothing about this was the way that he'd planned it in his head. There was no dinner, no date and no romantic gesture. They were sitting in Jounouchi's apartment, on a decrepit couch that Yuugi had seen his father lounge in with a beer and half-eaten TV dinner. Not the ideal place for first-time sex. On the other hand, what men spent time thinking about the location of his first sexual experience? Not many of them, if Yuugi had learned anything from his friends, or from Jou. The opportunity itself was blessing enough.
He couldn't bring himself to question Jounouchi's feelings, which were solid and real - of that much he was certain. But none of those feelings had been expressed in a way that made Yuugi feel comfortable. Not yet.
It seemed petty, in his head, to complain more about the how than the why.
"It's okay," Jou told him, and he leaned close. "I'll show you. You gotta relax first." His voice was sweet, the sweetest that Yuugi had heard in a while.
It was enough to smooth over some of his worries.
Taking a deep breath, Yuugi said, "Can we ...not do it on the couch?"
There. A little honesty, but not too much.
Blond brows fought each other above Jounouchi's eyes. "Ah. Well... my room is messy, and you know how small it is..."
Yuugi frowned.
Jou scrambled for a reply. "—but we can go if you want. I want you to be comf'table."
He was not the type of person to hesitate. But Jounouchi wouldn't have offered if he weren't willing to follow through, so Yuugi pushed the issue.
"...then maybe we can go somewhere else?" The apartment was something that he'd talked himself into settling for.
If Jounouchi were unhappy, would he just let it go without saying anything?
"Like where? You said not your place cuz'a Gramps, right? What do ya wanna do, shack up at a hotel?" A laugh followed the suggestion.
The red covering Yuugi's face was enough of reply, not that he could have added anything even if he wanted. Anywhere sounded better than the living room where Jou's father lounged for a living.
"Right. So we ain't got too many options." There was an edge of irritation to Jou's voice, and Yuugi bit his lip. "Look, if you don't wanna, we don't have to."
"It's not that."
Butterflies swarmed in Yuugi's stomach. That single kiss from Jou had been enough to warm him from head-to-toe. He had been thinking about this day all week. Not only had he promised it to Jounouchi, but to himself too. The point wasn't to stop anything from happening, after all - it was merely to change the location.
Jounouchi shifted so that he sat on the couch properly and leaned back as though he was going to watch television. "So what'cha wanna do?" Reaching for the table, he picked up a spare napkin and spat his gum into it, rolled it into a ball and tossed it into the trash bin next to the TV. He made it in easily.
This was the make-it-or-break-it moment, Yuugi knew, and instead of giving in to the churning of his stomach he belted out his answer as best as he could.
"I want to go to a hotel."
He would never tell Jou, but he would feel less cheap in a hotel than he would in the run-down apartment. The place had never really been Jou's, and even though he cooked and cleaned for his dad the place almost always looked like a pigsty. Just from his position on the couch alone Yuugi could make out three carpet stains on the floor and there was no way to tell which were blood, puke or food. There were stories to back all three.
Jounouchi's fists clenched. "Those cost, Yuugi."
There was no way to be sure whether or not Jou was making excuses at this point, but money wasn't a problem. "I have forty dollars that I won dueling this week," Yuugi was quick to tell him. "If that helps."
Money was always a difficult subject for the two of them, and Yuugi tried to avoid speaking about it whenever possible. Jounouchi worked hard to keep some in his pocket and food in the fridge. Sometimes he'd pay rent, too. While Yuugi was more fortunate, he wasn't exactly swimming in coins either and because of that, Jou would very rarely allow him to contribute anything. Even when it was more convenient.
"Just that?" The question made it clear to Yuugi that what he had would not be enough.
Forty bucks for dueling was small, he could admit. "Well, I have more at the shop, Jou, but—"
"Nah, Yuug'." Frowning, Jou stood, and moved toward the back of the apartment, to his room. "Hang on. I got somethin'."
Yuugi heaved a sigh in Jounouchi's absence. He had single-handedly ruined the whole evening. A very large part of him wanted to simply make Jou happy regardless of his own wishes, and that part of him suffered. Seeing disappointment on Jounouchi's face had been what Yuugi had been trying to avoid; the knit brows, the sigh of discontent.
What if Jounouchi just got tired of waiting and decided to put this off until later? Yuugi didn't think that he could wait another week for the time to do this. Despite his negativity, he had done a lot of thinking and justifying - and if they didn't have sex this weekend he wasn't sure that he could talk himself into it again. It wouldn't take much for Jou to find someone else to do it with. No one would be willing to wait forever, right?
When Jounouchi returned he had a wad of cash in his hand, and Yuugi tried to push those thoughts away.
Just seeing that much at once made Yuugi uncomfortable. Was that Jou's savings?
Sex isn't worth that much money. Especially not when he had dueling prize money at home. They could easily walk a few blocks to retrieve it.
But the grin on Jounouchi's face was hard to miss, so Yuugi tried to calm himself. "I got it. D'ya know which one is closest?"
"Jou, I think that we should just go by the shop—" Lips bestowed a shockingly soft kiss to his nose.
"Nah," Jou repeated softly. "I got it."
Yuugi didn't have a response ready. Why did Jou do this to him, surprise him with gestures that made him want to give in to whatever was asked of him? In less than a moment he reconsidered all of his previous doubts. It would be worth the discomfort, the terrible environment, if it was Jou - because he did do sweet things sometimes.
Like kiss him on the nose. Like giving him the time of day. Like waiting.
"Yuug', I think I know a place. It's kinda close t'the school, though."
Still swooning in the wake of Jounouchi's kindness, Yuugi didn't see how that could be a problem. "But it's after six."
Rolling his eyes, Jou pointed out what he missed. "They don't just leave when the school closes - some of 'em hang around. 'Specially the gangs, Yuug'. Teachers too."
Even the idea of being spotted by a fellow classmate set Yuugi more on edge than he'd already been, and he couldn't fathom what he'd say to a teacher if they encountered one. He wasn't embarrassed of Jou, but...
"Don't look like that," Jounouchi told him, sighing heavily. "I just got everythin' together. We're still goin', right?"
Yuugi gave his confirmation in the form of a nod. He didn't trust himself to sound confident.
The next few minutes were a blur. Jou rushed the both of them from the apartment and Yuugi was glad to leave the place behind. No matter how much he cared about Jounouchi, he just couldn't see himself losing his virginity in such a ...messy place. Yuugi had always pictured his first time taking place in his own room. In hindsight he didn't really feel comfortable with the idea of having sex anywhere else, even if Gramps was a liability.
His face was flushed red the entire time that they walked. The evening was warm and mellow, a gentle breeze brushing through. Jou walked at a leisurely pace, not too quick or too slow; but after the first few blocks Yuugi's heart pounded. What if someone saw them?
Suddenly, everyone could see his thoughts, the lewd pictures in his head. Every person they passed on the street knew that he, Yuugi Mutou, was going to a hotel to 'give it up'. Each pair of eyes were sizing him up, trying to figure out how much of a whore he would be.
Having sex with someone you love doesn't make you a whore. But he felt dirty, like he was selling himself. Did he make the right decision?
Jounouchi's silence was comforting at first. Yuugi could appreciate the fact that Jou hadn't tried to rub it in. He couldn't think of anything to say that wouldn't make the moment less tense. In spite of all of the porn he'd ever watched or all of the manga he'd ever read, the notion of two people strolling casually to a hotel to have sex unsettled him. It made him wonder how many other couples he'd ever passed had gone to do the same thing.
Soon enough, his thoughts turned to Jounouchi. The other boy's smile, when Yuugi bothered to look up, appeared to be genuine and consistent. What was he thinking of to keep himself so composed, while Yuugi toiled in a harsh land of butterflies and quakes and blushing and sweaty hands?
Maybe if we talk, I'll feel better. He could at least try.
"Uhm, so..." he began, but the thought quickly faded. His heart raced, and he couldn't finish his sentence.
"What?" Jounouchi answered a few seconds later. "Yuugi, did y'say somethin'?"
He still hadn't thought of anything. "No," he said quickly.
You're an idiot.
Approaching the school grounds was the most difficult. They were only passing the building, walking around it, but Yuugi couldn't help but glance toward the building every few seconds. He expected someone to come out of it and with complete accuracy accuse him of exactly what he was doing. Going to a love hotel ...with another boy.
When the small silhouette of a person in the distance exited the school building, Yuugi panicked. He picked up his pace and moved to the outside of the sidewalk. Maybe Jounouchi's shape would keep him from view.
His heart beat against his chest; he thought he might be having a heart attack.
"Yuugi... you okay?"
He was a few steps ahead when he realized that Jou had stopped walking completely. Why would he stop when they can see us?!
When Jou sighed deeply, Yuugi tried his best to calm himself. The goal was to keep Jounouchi happy, somehow. They'd agreed to go to the hotel - he just had to follow through. Just - quickly. The faster they got to the place the less of them anyone could see.
What if Jou thinks I don't want to be seen with him? He was doing everything wrong; he couldn't even be comfortably uncomfortable.
As though to confirm his worries, his companion shook his head. "Yuug'... we don't have to go if ya don't wanna." The expression on Jounouchi's face was sincere. "You look like you're gonna throw up."
That certainly didn't make him feel any better. Shaking his head until he became lightheaded, Yuugi took a deep breath.
"I'm just... I'm nervous. That's all. Let's go." He could care less what direction they were moving in, but they needed to move before anyone saw them or guessed where they were going.
"I keep tellin' ya - ya don't hafta be."Jounouchi shook his head and continued walking. "We're not doin' anythin' wrong."
After another full block they found themselves in front of their destination. To Yuugi's relief, it looked much better than Jou's apartment. The building looked very plain, but the street was clean in front of it and the lights were on (the lights on Jounouchi's apartment building were not, most of the time). Never would he have guessed that this building could have been hotel. It looked more like a dorm, and though Yuugi scoured the exterior for several seconds, he could not find a sign advertising their business. Many of the hotels he had seen in the past had cheesy names based on bad puns strung up in bright, obnoxious lights.
He had nearly climbed the stairs when Jou called, "Hang on a sec."
Unsure of why they were waiting (outside, where people could see them heading in), Yuugi looked back to see Jounouchi tousling his hair, of all things. When he'd finished it looked like he had just gotten out of bed. Then he jogged up onto the landing, next to Yuugi, and trudged forward, opening the door and going through.
Just before he approached the desk, he shot Yuugi a wink.
A woman sat at the counter, slim and pretty with short, black hair. Though she fiddled with paperwork at first, she looked up at the sound of the door opening. A frown crossed her face as Jounouchi entered. With a muted clack the stack of paper hit the counter in front of her.
"I... I uh..." Jou stammered, looking around nervously. "I need a room." Yuugi tried to look as small as possible. His height became an advantage - maybe she wouldn't notice him if he tried hard enough.
The woman did not look impressed. "Right. Sure you do." She rolled her eyes. "Kid, you're too young to be renting from us. You got ID?"
Oh, god. That was something that Yuugi hadn't thought of. Normally, when he stayed in rooms for tournaments and the like, Gramps would reserve them for him. What little identification he had would only tell her that he was a high school student.
Jounouchi sniffed, rubbing his nose, and reached into his pocket and emerged with what Yuugi assumed was an ID and a wad of cash. Clipped together, the stack of bills seemed much larger than was necessary. How much would their room cost? The thought crossed his mind that they may have needed to bribe her to keep her quiet about their presence. This was all so much more trouble than he had wanted.
Placing the items into her hands, Jounouchi leaned in and whispered something into the woman's ear. She sighed, shook her head, and looked down at what she had been given.
Yuugi strained to hear the short exchange between them and he frowned when he failed. What was Jou telling her?
"I know that things are hard for you at home," she said to Jounouchi, "but you can't keep coming here. It's against the rules." She waved the card around. "...I'm not going to question this for now but next time, at least change out of your uniforms. My boss could walk in at any moment." When the woman placed the ID back on the counter as quickly as possible and pushed it towards them. The wad of cash disappeared under her desk.
Until she'd mentioned it, Yuugi hadn't realized that they were still in their school clothes. Even with Jounouchi's jacket, the blue and white was distinct and recognizable. Domino high was just a few blocks away.
The woman pointed at the small check-in ledger in front of Jou. "Sign your name and the appropriate dates there. Room 313. Call the front desk before you come down for anything." She placed a small key, attached to a keychain that bore the hotel's logo, next to the book.
Without skipping a beat, Jounouchi replied, "I know the drill; I can handle it." Then he scrawled something down and swiped the key off of the counter, pocketing it casually before walking off.
So much time was spent observing the exchange that Yuugi was nearly left behind. To his surprise, the woman smiled gently at him and bowed her head just slightly as he passed. By the time he was once again at pace with Jounouchi she was no longer in sight.
Yuugi hissed, "What was that?"
Jou was carefully shaping his hair back into its proper place as he continued down the hallway.
"...that's Kanako. She runs the front desk. I sleep here sometimes when dad's being… unreasonable. 'makes a fuss about me being here just for the sake of it, but she's cool. I know her hours, so no worries."
Yuugi tried to hide his surprise. He hadn't been aware that Jounouchi stayed overnight anywhere else besides the Game Shop or at Honda's.
The hotel was a large building, shaped like the corners of a rectangle. Once the two of them rounded the corner by the check-in desk, a long, empty hall stood before them. The walls were an off-white color, the paint smooth and flawless. Yuugi's skin crawled. He felt for sure that this place was filled with secrets - what sort of people stayed at a place like this? It wasn't like any sort of Hotel he had been to before. They hadn't seen a single person since arriving, and straining his ears Yuugi couldn't make out any voices, or noises in the space around them. Even passing the small enclaves in the hall that branched out into rooms, nothing could be heard.
Beneath them the carpet was a dark red, standing stark against the walls. If the secrets in this building were hiding, Yuugi imagined it would be in that floor. The choice in color was odd enough; customers feeling as though they were walking on a path of blood collected from the previous visitors couldn't have possibly been good for business. Though the corridor was lined with tables, vases and fake flowers, none of it was comforting.
At the opposite end of the hall was the elevator, and Yuugi felt that they couldn't have gotten into it fast enough. It was small, perhaps large enough for five people to squeeze in, and it seemed to fit the theme of the hotel. The walls were a dull silver. The chamber hummed as they stepped inside and grew a bit louder as Jounouchi pressed the button that read 3. The two of them rode in silence and Yuugi wasn't sure if that was good or bad.
The two of them were about to have sex for the first time. Shouldn't we be talking? he asked himself. Rather than cold and quiet, shouldn't they have been laughing or enjoying each other warmly? It all felt too mechanical for Yuugi, too far away from the date and dinner and smiles and kisses that he had imagined.
By the time that he looked up at Jou, to open his mouth and say something, the two of them nearly collided as they came to a stop in front of their room. 313, the door read in sophisticated looking numbers. The gold etchings were another reminder that they were in a hotel and not at home, where Yuugi would have felt the most comfortable.
A few seconds was all it took to get the door open. "I'm so glad you talked me into this," Jounouchi told him as they walked in, stretching. "I'm always stingy about money but sometimes it's nice to feel a little comf'table." He turned to the right and flipped a few light switches.
It was hard to reply to Jou with his jaw on the floor.
Their first step inside was into a kitchen area, with countertops on both sides and an overhead cabinet to the left. The right side held a small refrigerator and stove for cooking. Beyond that lay a small den area with a couch and television. He wasn't sure if he could imagine what the rest of it looked like, but it didn't seem like a bad place for what they were planning to do.
"Surprised, right?" Jounouchi showed off one of his goofiest smiles. "It's a real gem. 'Knew you'd like it. The room and the bathroom are down there on the right. There's even another TV!" he added.
Yuugi's face burned and he couldn't stop it. Flashing through his mind in a loop was Jou whispering and the wad of money slipping under the desk.
Jounouchi seemed to read his mind, and crossed his arms. "I hope you're not gonna insult me by askin' how much it cost." His grin was smug. Kicking off his shoes, Jou unceremoniously tossed them into the den. They landed harmlessly on plush, beige carpet but it seemed like bad manners to Yuugi.
It was clear by Jounouchi's tone of voice that there was only one answer to his question. "...N-no, I won't." Carefully, Yuugi removed his shoes and began to walk them over to a clear space where they wouldn't be in the way. Everything seemed so pristine, so orderly, and he was quite worried that he would ruin things somehow.
He didn't make it to the den because Jounouchi had other plans; namely grabbing Yuugi by the waist and hoisting him up onto the open counter. Being picked up or carried was not on a turn on for him - it made him feel like a child - and he clutched his shoes defensively against his chest. Not that it made a difference to Jou.
"Drop 'em," he ordered, lips pressing on Yuugi's neck. That press quickly turned into a soft bite, a few licks. Skin rolled between teeth.
No, no, no. Not here!
But his body wasn't getting the memo. A deep sigh fell from his lips and Yuugi panted shamelessly.
"Jou…" he moaned.
This wasn't what he wanted, but Jounouchi hands were running across his chest, cradling their bodies together and he felt so wanted. A burning sensation filled his chest, and it became difficult to breathe.
Jounouchi was moaning, too. "Can't wait." He pawed at the pair of shoes in Yuugi's hands, prying fingers away.
Yuugi tried his best to fight his urges. He'd made it all the way there - surely Jou could wait just a little longer? Clearing his throat, he called out again. "Jou… Jou."
This time, Jounouchi captured his lips and held them prisoner. The kiss wasn't passionate or hungry. Their lips simply lingered, resting against each other. It was gentle and heartfelt, and when Jou finally pulled away he also took a step back.
"Sorry," he professed. "I couldn't help myself. I finally got you alone, and—" he cut himself off, but the look in his eye finished the sentence for him. He took yet another step back. Then he turned on tiptoe and straightened himself up.
Feeling guilty for wanting to give in, Yuugi told him, "It's okay. Just… give me a few minutes to get settled, okay?"
Now it felt like he made Jounouchi wait for no good reason. Though all he did was place his shoes in an appropriate place and hang his jacket, it all seemed like an excuse. Each second ticked by as though it were two, and his heart pounded loudly. Jou stood there patiently, checked his watch and focused on one of the windows. He looked bored.
Yuugi felt like he'd done something wrong. Logically, he told himself, there was no difference in waiting or not waiting. They would have the entire night and part of the morning. No reason to rush. This was a nice room, bright and posh and everything that he had been hoping for. So instead he took the time to think and calm the butterflies in his stomach.
He didn't want to mess this up. Now that his requests had been met, the pressure of his ability to return the favor was crushing. Jounouchi had waited and even changed location. But Yuugi was new to giving in and giving up and seeing was not the same as doing. He wanted to be a good lay because Jou had worked so hard and done everything that was asked of him. They were already off to a weird start.
It only took a few seconds to put away the things that he'd needed and it felt so petty to be so adamant about it.
What can I say? Yuugi wondered as he finished hanging up his jacket. He was stupid and silly and wasn't making sense.
Step-by-step, he made his way back to Jounouchi's side. Mind still blank for things to say, Yuugi simply tugged on the familiar green coat.
"I'm really nervous," he said. In no way did he want to admit it but Jou would have to be an idiot to not have noticed it already.
When Jounouchi turned back to him, however, he grinned. "No kiddin'."
Without hesitation, his hands sought Yuugi's, their fingers interlacing. "We still don't hafta, you know… if you don't want." The smile faltered just a little, enough to show a hint of disappointment.
No no no no!
Yuugi had made a promise and he wanted to keep it. He wasn't trying to get out of it completely; he loved Jou, and just wanted to do things the right way. That's not it. I'm just… nervous."
After struggling for a few moments, he turned up nothing. No words to explain how he felt. But Jou had waited all this time and, besides that, Yuugi wanted this. It was the pace that concerned him; the moment threatened to fade away as soon as he gave in.
"Try not t'be."
Jou backed towards the bedroom ahead. Their steps were silent on the carpet. Yuugi could hear his heart pounding as they crossed the threshold.
The bedroom, in comparison to the rest, was pretty plain. A small wooden dresser stood on the left and the bed, a standard size - not large or small - was on the right. Aside from that, the room was dreadfully empty. The walls were the same off-white as the rest of the hotel, accented with black around the perimeter where it met the carpet. The single window, opposite the entrance, was decorated with simple red curtains, drawn back to allow light to pour through. The gold tint of the sunset stained everything in its path. It didn't look bad, so far as Yuugi was concerned.
It still felt strange, though. Even when the two of them sat down on the edge of the bed, holding hands, Yuugi felt awkward. Forced, was what came to mind.
Nothing seemed right. Jou being handsy wasn't right; taking the time to be gentle made Yuugi feel almost as though he was being babied. Sighing in frustration, Yuugi tried to get himself together. Clearly, he was the problem. Jounouchi wasn't doing anything wrong.
"Still nervous?" Jou asked. The chuckle that followed made it clear that he knew the answer.
"Y-yeah."
Blond eyes knitted in thought, but Yuugi couldn't decipher his expression. Aside from studying Yuugi's face, Jou looked pretty calm. The light of hunger in his eyes was gone and his grip was light.
"C'mere."
Yuugi could feel the blush spread over his face as he drew close. He leaned over, slowly, towards Jounouchi. Holding his breath, he knew that the kiss was coming. Eyes fluttering closed, he waited. A small puff of breath rolled over his nose as Jou began to laugh. When Yuugi opened his eyes, Jounouchi leaned back, away from him, grin wide and shoulders heaving.
"I'm sorry, Yuug'," he huffed between chuckles. "It's just that, well, you're so serious about this. It's so cute. I wasn't ready."
Yuugi's lips twisted into a disapproving frown.
Another few seconds passed before Jou was able to settle down. "Look, what's it you're worried about? Me? You still feel like we're movin' too fast?"
Again, he was stumped as to how to put his feelings into words. So Yuugi sat, racking his brain for something that sounded close to right.
"No," he said first, because he didn't want to make Jounouchi feel bad. "And… and yes. I just—I don't know! I want to, but—"
Jou sighed, and then withdrew his hand to clutch at his jacket. "If it's that hard t'pick, then we shouldn't."
That wasn't right. It wasn't fair. Jounouchi had put all of his time and effort into today and Yuugi had promised. Yuugi didn't break his promises.
"Yuug', look… you don't hafta feel like you owe me. Let's just relax for t'day alright?"
He felt exposed. How did Jou know? The accuracy shocked him into silence. Jounouchi shouldn't have had to worry about any of this in the first place. Even if he wanted to, what if he couldn't go through with it? His blood boiled at the thought. Since when did he become so ungrateful? The idea of being able to trust his best friend with his life, but not something like this, was beyond infuriating. There was no one else to be upset at.
Fix it, Yuugi told himself. Do something about this right now!
In the heat of the moment, his hands weren't sure what to do. Jounouchi's touch was no longer there to calm him. They ended up in his hair, tugging fistfuls of dark strands.
Aloud, he blurted, "Then ...w-why do I feel like I do?"
Jou sighed again, loudly and dramatically, and shook his head. Then he stood, facing the door. He stretched, arms extended, fingers flexing for just a moment before both hands were planted firmly behind his head. There was yet another sigh, and Yuugi felt like crying.
"You're thinkin' about it too much."
When he turned to look Yuugi in the eyes, he smiled again, as though they had all the time in the world.
Yuugi wasn't fooled. That was the face that Jou made when he accepted something difficult. When things got hard, that was when Jounouchi smiled brightest and laughed hardest. It was the best and worst thing about him.
Jou's smile didn't falter this time. He grasped Yuugi's hands as he moved back toward the bed. Without warning he knelt to the floor. On his knees, they were nearly the same height. Yuugi was only an inch or two taller.
Unable to deny even the possibility of a kiss, Yuugi leaned closer. He wanted so desperately to them both to be happy.
"Feelings don't start here," Jounouchi said, pressing their foreheads together instead. "They start here." The last word was punctuated with a soft punch to the chest.
Then he pushed his lips to Yuugi's.
To say that Yuugi was flustered was an understatement. They shared a few pecks before Jounouchi retreated, moving to sit next to him before they resumed. The two of them made eye contact, and Yuugi quickly looked away. Jou's intensity had always been more than he could handle.
It was as close to bracing as he could get because Jou, as usual, was not one to waste time. When they joined again, Jou held them together, dipping Yuugi back until he was lying on the bed. Looming over him, Jounouchi's kisses quickly descended to his neck. The warmth of the embrace filled Yuugi up - his chest tightened, his temperature rose. It was the start of a slow, vivid torture.
Jou didn't say a word as he continued. His lips made light smacking sounds between breaths, silence prevailing only when his tongue lapped circles on Yuugi's skin. He didn't stay away for long, though. The more kisses they shared, the more hungry he became. Soft, suckling, lingering soon turned into a deep, plundering, never-ending attack that left Yuugi gasping.
It was hard to think of anything with Jounouchi over him, demanding his attention. Yuugi's eyes fluttered open as he tried to make sense of it all. Brown orbs were already watching him, smouldering as they caught Yuugi's gaze and held it. He lasted several moments before a blush conquered his features and he looked away, turning his head.
Jounouchi leaned down, pressing a kiss just behind Yuugi's ear, then whispered, "I'm gonna take your shirt off, if that's alright."
Too flustered to say much else Yuugi nodded and, eager to please, began to squirm out of the garment himself.
"Hey." Jou's voice was quiet. His fingers drummed along Yuugi's side.
Even through his clothes, it was enough to illicit a shiver. "Huh?"
"I'll do it."
"O-okay." Yuugi wasn't sure if he could stand Jou staring at him the entire time. Yuugi could feel those same fingers from before grip the hem of his shirt.
Jou chuckled. "It ain't nothin'. Just relax, 'kay? Don't think about it."
Another nod from Yuugi was the response. Then he closed his eyes and tried to force the tension away. Jounouchi didn't mind him being indecisive or nervous or anxious and, well, that was the best that he could hope for.
He leaned up just a little, to help Jou get the shirt from underneath him. It was pulled off just seconds later and tossed to the side. Then Jounouchi was at it again, this time pressing lips all over Yuugi's chest and stomach, slowly working lower. Yuugi found it hard to keep from curling up.
A soft moan nearly slipped free, and Yuugi clasped his hands over his mouth to stop the noise.
Jounouchi froze where he was, lips hovering just over Yuugi's belly button. He sat up straight and shifted, straddling Yuugi properly. With a long, languid stretch upwards, he pulled off his jacket, first, and then his shirt. He ground their hips together, the friction enough to cause another gasp.
The friction spurned his whole body to grow hot and images of their bodies flush together, naked, flashed through his mind. Something like a squeal broke from Yuugi's lips, muffled by his hands.
When Jounouchi leaned down again, he kissed Yuugi's fingers and gave a soft command, "Move. I wanna hear ya." The smirk on his face was smug, clearly reveling in the ability to force those sounds.
But it was such an embarrassing request. "Jou…"
There was no answer. Instead, lips closed over his neck, sucking and peppering more kisses. They were distracting - tingles running down to his lower half and back up again - Yuugi just wanted them to be naked together already. That was the most intimidating part!
"I'm going to—" It was hard to concentrate. Jounouchi's hands were roaming again, picking and pinching, tapping and probing. Yuugi pushed them away. "—I want to finish getting undressed."
"Hm." The sound was that of disappointment. "'Kay."
The pressure was suddenly gone and, just that fast, that head full of blond hair was out of view. Yuugi sat up, trying to keep his cool, regain some control over his breathing. Fumbling out of his own clothes, he was gripped by self-doubt.
As Jou wriggled out of his jeans, he stretched again and Yuugi watched the muscles pull taut.
It had never occurred to him to think of whether Jounouchi would find his body attractive. The two of them had fooled around a lot before and it never came up. They had never talked about it. But right when he started to feel comfortable, the idea burrowed itself into his brain. He couldn't fight - didn't have muscles - and wasn't much to look at otherwise, either. Yuugi had always been short and that wasn't new, but what if seeing him without clothes was different? Hasty hands wriggling under clothes was one thing - what if seeing made Jou feel too weird about it?
Like fucking a child, he thought dejectedly, and held himself.
But Jounouchi's expression didn't change. That smirk stayed in place, brown eyes taking him in. Yuugi couldn't stand to meet his eyes.
"Still sure? Just checkin'. You look like you're thinkin' again."
Yuugi bit his lips and nodded.
"Nervous?"
This time, he snapped. "What does it look like?"
Jounouchi looked shocked. "Geez. Fine," he said, and sprawled out on the bed face up. "Lemme know when you're ready."
There was no use in pouting about discomfort, it seemed, so Yuugi joined him. "Sorry."
"I know. You're nervous, you said."
With Jou keeping still, Yuugi felt a little braver, moved a little closer. He didn't feel like he'd be swallowed up in the expectations of all that passion. Head resting on Jounouchi's chest, he could feel the heartbeat underneath; fast but steady and strong. Yuugi fit perfectly. An arm curled around him but even that felt comfortable, and he sighed. This was okay. Lying next to each other, bodies touching. A kiss pressed to his forehead and he nuzzled closer, closed his eyes.
"You're too cute, Yuug'."
Yuugi woke with a start, body twisting violently. He didn't recognize his surroundings at first. Everything was nearly pitch black. Slowly, it all came back to him. The bare room, the bed, their conversation, the warmth of curling up next to someone he cared deeply about.
How badly he'd fucked things up.
As he lunged into a sitting position, Yuugi realized that Jounouchi wasn't next to him. Sudden pressure on his legs startled him, and he nearly squealed aloud. He flailed but the force held him still.
"Aww, shit," said Jounouchi's voice said from the darkness. Close by, but not in his ear. "I was hoping I'd get ya while you were 'sleep."
He could feel warm breath on one of knees. The shock brought their surroundings to focus. He could spot the outline of the lonely dresser on the other side of the room. Night sky covered the view outside of the window. Aside from Jounouchi's voice, there was silence. When did he fall asleep? It wasn't enough that he was too nervous about this, but Jou had paid so much for this room - now he had wasted, too.
Jounouchi's presence loomed closer, leaning between his legs, towards—
"Oh, well," Jou said happily. His head dipped down and he took Yuugi into his mouth. Just like that. Like it was nothing.
Yuugi could feel the blush on his face, knew that, if the light was on, his cheeks would be beet red. "Wait—"
"Mm-Mm," hummed Jounouchi with a slight shake of his head.
With such a pleasant sensation enveloping him, Yuugi was helpless to do much besides force his eyes shut and try to resist being completely taken over by shudders. Jou's mouth was warm and moist and good, and he felt bad about it. About not being able to follow things through, about forcing his friend, his lover to such lengths for satisfaction.
Hands snaked their way around the outsides of his thighs, spreading him so that those lips could take him in deeper. Yuugi could feel his cock harden in Jounouchi's mouth and turned his head away, whimpering. He couldn't think clearly with that tongue glossing the tip. Hips reacted to the touch and intensity without his permission; they bucked and had to be held down.
Then there was relief. The heat dissipated and a low voice called for him. "Yuugi."
He waited until the sensations subsided to open his eyes and meet Jou's.
"I'm gonna stop if you don't watch."
That's not fair at all, he thought, and frowned.
"So don't look away."
"I won't," he promised, but wasn't sure if it was one he could keep.
Jounouchi dipped down again, tongue swirling around the shaft before taking it all in again. Yuugi moaned and the sound seemed to almost echo amidst the silence in the room. Brown eyes gazed up at him as a mouth worked below, and the view was too erotic. It wasn't just the sight of it - Jou moaned loudly through each lick and suck and it was clear who enjoyed it the most. Yuugi couldn't handle it. A shudder triggered down his spine and he bucked again, closed his eyes for just a split second—
When his vision focused, he trembled. Jou's hands untangled themselves from his limbs and then, he was being stroked. Hard, fast, and pushing him ever closer. Yuugi didn't want to come, though, not alone. But when Jou pinned his attention on the erection in his hands, pulled that bottom lip between his teeth - each pass from top to bottom and back again brought a host of thrills with them. There was just enough friction to send jolts through his loins, across his stomach and to his fingertips. They threatened to take control of his body and render him helpless to fight them. He'd be writhing soon enough under such rough treatment. It was hard enough keeping his head up to look already.
"W-wait!" Yuugi cried. He panted aloud, struggling to keep himself in check and catch his breath.
Even kneeling, Jou looked predatory. The way he licked his lips, as though he were enjoying a good meal, had Yuugi shivering all over again. "Had enough?" A breathy laugh sounded in the darkness.
Yuugi finally let his full weight rest on the bed, eyes up on the ceiling. "Yes, yes, I can't… I don't think I can take much more."
There were another few long, moist laps from the base of his shaft to the tip. Jounouchi released his grip soon after, and slid off of the bed. Yuugi could finally move - not that he was going to. Heart thumping hard in his chest, erection hanging heavy against his stomach, he could only focus on breathing.
"Mm. Ready?" Jounouchi was suddenly beside him, grinning, pecking a kiss on his lips. Yuugi wrinkled his nose but didn't resist.
For the moment, things felt fine. All the worries that had clawed at him earlier seemed to fall away; even if he wasn't everything that Jou had dreamed of, it didn't seem to matter. That big grin said that he was enough.
Before he could answer, fingers reached between his legs again and gently squeezed. Yuugi hissed at the touch, pre-cum oozing over knuckles, and he sighed. Jounouchi let go of him without complaint, though, distracted momentarily by the task of unwrapping a condom. The crinkle of the wrapper had Yuugi feeling anxious all over again. He found himself wishing they'd had sex sooner - then this moment wouldn't be happening. They'd already know each other, what was comfortable. Making Jou feel good wouldn't be such an intimidating idea.
He wouldn't be thinking You're going to be SO bad at this.
Again, hands set upon him and Yuugi was tempted to tell Jounouchi to stop messing around so that they could get it over with. But a smooth, tight material stretch over his cock and he was nearly shocked into silence as he realized what happened. He struggled to sit up, to see and confirm what he already knew.
This was not how any of this was supposed to go, at all. Yuugi panicked. "What are you doing?"
Jounouchi smirked devilishly as he rolled the rest of the condom down. "Whaddya think?"
"I can't—" Too many expectations, not enough time to adjust.
Not that his floundering stopped Jou from straddling his hips. With knees planted on either side of him, weight not quite pressing down, Yuugi received another kiss.
"Don't think too hard," He was told. "I'll take care of it, alright?" Their erections were pressed together between them, rubbing together, and for the first time he felt Jounouchi's body quake against him.
But it was still a little hard to believe. "You really want me to—"
"I love being fucked." Jou grinned. The confession was spoken in confidence, unapologetic, and his entire expression oozed desire. "'Been thinkin' about it since you picked t'day." He wriggled his arms beneath Yuugi's back, against the sheets below until he could crush their bodies together in a hug.
Because Jou wouldn't see it, Yuugi frowned, jealous that he couldn't voice his own wants so clearly and without concern. Nor could he voice all his fears. He still wasn't sure how to feel about any of this. When Jounouchi pulled back, gazing at him again, the brows were narrowed and lips pursed.
Immediately, Yuugi felt guilty. "Okay."
"...It ain't me, is it?" Jou asked. He sat up straight, weight resting mostly on his haunches. Those lips nearly pouted as he added. "Am I makin' this weird?"
If Yuugi didn't get himself together, they'd be caught in the same cycle from earlier.
"No - no! I'm just …I've never done this." Those puppy dog eyes forced him to be honest. "I don't want to be bad at this."
Jounouchi snorted, and the grin was back just as quickly as it had vanished. "You worry too much. Gotta start somewhere, at least. Now c'mere." Again, their bodies were forced flush against each other, and their lips too.
Yuugi tried to relax into the kiss, to let the other thoughts fade away into nothing. Jou held him, tongue delving in, tasting and pulling the breath from him. And Yuugi did his best to not lose himself in the embrace. When they separated for air, his lips were swollen and though he wanted to say something sweet and tender - so that Jounouchi would know that he was appreciated - he gaped instead and couldn't utter a thing.
Sitting up again, creating space between them, Jounouchi wriggled his hips and smiled.
"Is this really what you want?" Yuugi finally managed to say. It was not at all as sweet as he imagined.
But Jou seemed almost sheepish as he turned away, still grinning. "Nothin' would be more perfect." He hovered over Yuugi for just a moment, hand guiding the erection beneath him to its intended destination. A few strokes were enough to make it throb and straighten. Jou squirmed and, after a bit of resistance it began to slowly slide inside.
Or was he being pulled in? Yuugi just knew that Jounouchi felt smooth and warm and tight, tighter than any mouth could feel. But it was too smooth - when had Jou had time to lube himself? - and he whimpered.
His wasn't the only voice, though. The man above him looked as though he was fit to burst already. Yuugi watched his cock disappear inch by inch until their hips met, bit his lip as Jounouchi screwed his eyes shut and panted over him. As a test, he rolled them up, pushed against the weight hovering over. When Jounouchi trembled, he felt it, and they both moaned.
"Fuck," Jou said, and Yuugi watched him struggle to open his eyes, to look down and breathe and remember where they were. "Wait," he added. "I need a minute. If you fuckin' move I swear to god I'm gonna blow all over you."
"Yeah," Yuugi agreed weakly. Every second of stillness was euphoric suffering, a single unending spasm stroking his whole body. Liquid heat crashed through his veins and desire overwhelmed him. It felt painful and lovely, but he couldn't keep himself steady. Not when every small shift made him shiver, and certainly not with Jou smearing pre-cum all over his stomach.
This was the opportunity he'd been waiting for; to make Jou feel as good as he felt when they were together.
"I'm gonna m-move," he said softly.
Jounouchi shook his head, biting his lip, but it hardly mattered. Bending his knees, Yuugi lifted his hips and grunted; Jou was heavy. He managed anyhow. The first few strokes were quick, more a small bounce than anything, but any motion at all was a relief from the intense feeling of just resting inside.
At some point he pressed back too far into the mattress, slipping out, erection tingling as it was suddenly exposed to what felt like frigid air. Their hips crashed together, but not the way he wanted, and Jou leaned back on Yuugi's knees.
He blushed, unsure of how high his blunder rated on the overall scale, and whispered, "S-sorry," and then let out a nervous chuckle. If nothing else, he now knew that he wanted to be back inside, even if it meant he was reduced to trembling and it was too much for him to handle. Not more than a few seconds had passed and Yuugi already missed it.
There wasn't even a response - Jounouchi was just as displeased with their separation. They aligned themselves quickly and this time, pushing himself in was easier. The friction felt better and above him, Jou seemed to agree, breaths tumbling roughly out in puffs.
It was unlike anything he'd felt before, incomparable - mouths and hands were utterly different. He could feel their heartbeats through their bodies, hard, loud thumps that should have been audible; he could feel each breath they took in mismatched time and it spurned him to start again.
"You feel so good," Jou sighed.
The validation of those words spread through him, and he tried to hold on to them. "You too."
Yuugi impressed himself, settling into a not-too-quick pace. Jounouchi shifted his weight and it became easier to thrust up and with more force; they both moaned together with the effort and worked until they broke a sweat. The heat and the slickness and the squeeze became easier to handle the more he moved, building so that he could handle what had threatened to engulf him before.
Finally, Jou began to push his hips down, straightening his back and jutting them forward. The new angle made a world of difference; Yuugi could feel the depth and it was motivation to keep going until Jounouchi couldn't take it anymore. Hands clenched down on his stomach, bracing, and he couldn't help but smile. Something darker, rougher took hold of him as he watched Jou's face. Yuugi pushed harder and ground their hips together, hands roaming across the body on top of him. He wanted to drive Jou crazy. He wanted to say, 'I love you' with his cock, engrave it on the insides of the boy he loved so that it could never be forgotten.
But the angle changed again, Jou leaning forward and down for kisses. They were hastily given and then Yuugi pushed him back up.
"Stay where you were," he rasped desperately. Selfish, maybe, but he didn't want to lose that feeling. His erection throbbed in time with his heart as he neared the edge. He wanted to come - to see what it felt like, to see how impossible it was.
The smirk Jou flashed wasn't entirely there. It was broken by sudden floods of pleasure, not quite staying in place. "Here, right?" he gasped, hips insistent in their press. Muscles clenched.
It was too much: too hot, too tight, too good. Yuugi felt himself swell with the beginning of an orgasm, succumb to the headiness of it. He was swept away in its current. Limbs seized as they struggled to compensate for internal bliss trying to pull him apart from the seams. After the first several seconds he understood why others claimed to 'blank out' - the sensory overload was so complete, it was impossible to recall any one single sight or smell or sound or feeling; they all mixed together and his body couldn't handle it.
Yuugi became vaguely aware, at some point, of Jounouchi making noise and stroking himself a few times before he came. Warm spurts of cum littered Yuugi's stomach and some small part of him felt a bit disappointed. But that voice was tiny, miniscule in the face of what he'd just experienced and the rest of his brain decided that it didn't matter. He felt good and it didn't make sense to ruin that with worrying.
A tongue rolled around the edge of his ear, and he shuddered violently. When did Jounouchi get off of him? He couldn't remember, hadn't noticed. Nor could he gauge how much time had passed. But when he focused, he felt the lack of weight, the mess on his stomach, the cool air on his skin. They were separated, he realized, and that truly made him sad. No more heartbeat. No more breaths.
"Jou?" He wanted to touch and be as close as possible.
A moan sounded in his ear, too loudly, like a blown out speaker. "Was that okay?" was the whispered question, and concern littered the tones. "You been quiet for a while."
How anyone would worry after something like that made Yuugi anxious. It pushed through layers of numbness to the surface of his thoughts, and he sighed. Had it not felt just as good? The possibility of taking all that he'd felt and not give it back terrified him.
This time, the words came easily. "It was great," he said, smiling. His expression was cautious, tentative, ready to turn any second if need be. Yuugi poured every bit of energy towards focusing. The need to sleep seemed intent on taking of residence in his bones, and he wasn't sure how much longer he could fight it. "...but I'm worried."
Jou sighed, and planted a kiss on the side of his neck. "About what?"
"You."
Get up, clean yourself up, another thought, still small, pushed its way to the top. Not that he felt like moving at all, but it was nice to know some part of him had retained its dignity.
Warmth enveloped him as Jounouchi settled in closer, cradling him. "What—? No! That was awesome, I just - you looked so cute."
Hands roamed over him and Yuugi had to try hard not to shiver at the touches. Doing anything but staring up at the ceiling felt like too much effort, so he let Jou coddle him, pepper his cheek and neck and mouth with kisses. It was so sweet, more than he deserved for being so selfish.
"I just don't want'cha to regret it," Jou confessed, after a few minutes.
Yuugi had been so worked up about being comfortable - though that was actually important - and being attractive to someone who already liked him, and being the best at something he'd never done before… none of that made any kind of sense, he decided, in hindsight.
"I definitely don't," he murmured in response.
"Shower?"
The question was so sudden that he hadn't understood it. "What?"
"Didya wanna take a shower—get cleaned up?"
Exhaustion made it hard to lie. "No, not really."
Jou laughed. "Come on - don't sleep yet. You'll feel better after you wash up." He seemed to think Yuugi was joking.
Several tugs and pokes and annoying quips later, they were both up. Yuugi's body screamed at him for rest, and being under the water only relieved the aches a little. For better or worse, he was more alert at least. Jounouchi seemed unable to keep away even in the shower; he accepted gratuitous kisses and touches, tried to stave off the temptation to engage again. But as badly that Yuugi wanted to be intertwined again, he didn't have the energy.
Soon enough, they were in bed again, wrapped in blankets and huddling together underneath them. He'd nearly drifted off again when Jounouchi asked,
"Yuugi? It was really alright?"
Doing his best to snuggle closer, Yuugi nodded.
"Really?"
To know that, in his own way, Jou was just as nervous brought a lazy smile to his face. "I don't know why I was so ...ugh. I'm sorry," he apologized. "I just really care about what you think, and I didn't want to disappoint you."
"Never," Jou told him, and pressed a kiss to his forehead. "We were both bein' dumb."
That couldn't be right, but Yuugi didn't want to argue. Sleep was calling him and somehow things had turned out fine. "Shh," he said, since nothing else would help. "I wanna sleep."
"Tired you out, huh?" But Jou sounded just as tired - the grin didn't make it whole way across his face. But after a moment, he sighed and pressed them a little closer, arm curled tightly around Yuugi. "It's okay though. As long as you're not nervous."
{FIN}
After having read this over, I can't lie: I think I took it a little too far with the awkwardness. It was distracting at a certain point and I needed help dialing it back. I'd like to thank my friend Sun God Horus for helping me untangle myself from that.
I am, however, proud of the some of the transitions that take place as this story continues, though. A lot of fanfics have very idealistic views on how things go (including some stuff that I've written) and while it's possible for things to happen that way, it doesn't always. This was an excellent challenge and I struggled with it in all the right ways.
P.S. to Milly: I'm sorry that this was so late, but I hope you enjoyed it!
P.P.S.: I normally don't use asterisks to indicate scene shifts, but it seemed a little more appropriate stylistically in this story than a horizontal line insert this time around. Sorry if that bothered anyone!