Twilight Story Time

Authors input: This is a random story so don't kill me. My friend hates Edward so this is dedicated to her. So anyone that hates Edward as well will love this story.

"Hey Edward how was your day," Bella asked.

"It was okay. I just hope I can get another elk the next time I hunt," Edward said.

"Okay," Bella said.

"Hey what is that smell?" Edward asked.

"I don't know," Bella said annoyed.

"I am going to check it out," Edward said standing up.

Edward went to the door and was about to open it when the door toppled over him.

Jacob was on the top of the door and yelled, "Did someone call an exterminater? Oh yeah that was me."

"Get of of me you Mongrel," Edward said underneath the door.

"Oh, there you are I was wondering where you were," Jacob said lifting up the door.

Jacob grabbed Edward by the leg and threw him on the other side.

"Good job Jacob," Bella said happily.

"Bella," Edward said.

"Look Jacob is cooler then you. I don't know why I fell in love with you," Bella said poking her nose up.

Edward was looking at Bella shocked when Jacob had punched his arm through Edward's chest.

"Mongrel," Edward said looking at Jacob.

"Now burn in hell," Jacob said in a smile.

Jacobe poored oil on Edward and lit a match. Jacob pulled his arm out of Edward before Edward was fully burned.

"Good job Jacob. Now where is my kiss," Bella said in a saducing way.

Then Bella saw a fist coming out of her chest.

"Don't you dare think about it you slut," said a voice behind her.

"Good job honey," Jacob said smiling.

"Thanks dear," the girl said taking her arm out of Bella.

"Oh, Bella this is my wife Faith," Jacob said wrapping his arms around her.

"What?" Bella said as she was slowly dying.

And Bella fell to the ground and died.

"Thanks you guys. Now we don't have to be a stupid shadown behind them in the next book," Alice said coming in the house.

"Yeah. Without those two around we will have peace," Charisle said.

"Not to mention we won't have to try and kill you," said Aro.

"So let's celibrate," Faith said getting the wine and sparkeling cider.