Harry Potter and the Mental Breakdown
By Three Beavers in a Human Skin Suit
One morning, Harry Potter was bored. He decided that he was going to scare his aunt, uncle, and cousin. He went into the kitchen where they were all eating breakfast and took out his wand. He started transfiguring random objects in the room. The fridge became a giant plant, the stove a doll house, the table a fish, and all the canned food became bags of jelly beans. Petunia, Vernon, and Dudley all were terrified and began screaming really loudly. The neighbors heard them and called the police. The Ministry of Magic's sensors noticed the magic happening at Harry's house and sent over half of their Aurors.
When Harry saw all these people show up, he started firing Body Binding Hexes and Disarming Spells at everyone, even the Muggles. It took three hours before he was finally disarmed.
In all, there was $3,000 in damages, thirty people were Obliviated, and the Dursleys moved across town the next week. Harry was taken to Saint Mungo's and lived out the rest of his days in the mental ward. The rest of his days was not very long however, because since he was in the mental ward he was unable to learn how to defeat Voldemort. Voldemort came to power and ended up blowing up the hospital four years later.
At least Dudley had a lifetime's supply of jelly beans, so all was well.
The End