Chapter 1: 3. Things You Said Too Quietly
When Nowaki first seduced Hiroki he said it didn't matter if Hiroki came to love him in return. It was enough to make the one he loved happy, to please him. But of course it did matter. Nowaki had always been a giver, but little in his life had given back. Maybe this was why it seemed so natural to give to Hiroki without expectation; the expectation was there all the same. He spoke his love easily, shuddering from it each night, gasping it in tones only for the elder man's ears.
The man protested his closeness, his obsession. It was too hot, too busy, too annoying, he would say. Nowaki would smile that contented grin, but inside his chest would ache.
Having Hiroki was beyond his dreams, but being loved would be paradise.
Nowaki's first hint was when Hiroki offered to pleasure him. Naturally he declined, "oh no, Hiro-san. I couldn't ask you to do that," but the man wouldn't take no for an answer. Watching the pink tint on his cheeks, the endearing distortions of his face, and hearing the satisfied grunts told Nowaki that Hiroki was actually enjoying himself. Hiroki was enjoying pleasuring him.
Nowaki was in shock. He paid closer attention to the man, noticing other small hints such as him ironing his clothes when he wasn't around, giving him shy morning kisses, and more sexual exploration. It was as if Hiroki was opening up to him, slowly.
Finally, one morning when he turned around after giving him his usual goodbye kiss, Nowaki heard Hiroki whisper something. He stopped. What had he said?
Spinning around, he realized Hiroki looked extremely embarrassed at getting caught.
"What did you just say, Hiro-san?"
"Nothing. You're going to be late, idiot."
"Tell me Hiro-san," Nowaki persisted.
"It was nothing. Just thinking to myself," he mumbled not meeting his eyes.
"I doubt that." Nowaki pushed him gently against the wall holding him in place. His hand trailed his cheek, a leg brushing against his. "Please tell me," he pleaded.
Hiroki looked frantic to escape, but realizing there was no way to, reluctantly gave in. His whispered again, but this time Nowaki was close enough to make out the words. Immediately after he was kissing a flushed Hiroki, work forgotten.
I love you too.