Skirts
"Why can't boys wear skirts?"
.
She was at that age. The age where one question just wasn't enough and girls could do anything boys could do- better. Yes, seven-year old Sakura was a force to be reckoned with.
"Mommy, what's the difference between a boy and a girl?"
"What were those screams I heard all last night?"
"Daddy, how are babies made?"
And her latest inquiry:
"Why can't boys wear skirts?"
First she asked Kakashi-sensei. But he was too busy reading his book-that-must-not-be-named.
"Can I read your book?" Sakura asked.
With a poof, Kakashi was gone.
So she asked Sasuke (and, by default, Naruto).
"Why can't boys wear skirts?"
Naruto laughed. Sasuke rolled his eyes and took a bite out of his tomato.
"They can, Sakura-chan! They can!"
She raised an eyebrow and put a hand on her hip. "No they ca-an't."
"Sure they can! Ever heard of a kilt, Sakura-chan?"
"Kilts aren't skirts."
"Yes they are!"
"No they're not."
"A kilt is a skirt, right bastard?"
"…Shut up, dobe."
Sakura grinned. "So its settled then! You and Sasuke will both go put on skirts!"
Wait- what?
Seven year old logic.
.
"No."
"Please, Sasuke-kun?"
"No."
"Why nooooooooooooooot?"
"No."
Strike three.
"SASUKE-KUN YOU WILL PUT THAT SKIRT ON THIS INSTANT OR I WILL GOUGE YOUR EYES OUT WITH A SPORK!"
She had definitely been spending too much time around Naruto.
"…Fine."
"Thank you, Sasuke-kun! That's so sweet of you! I even picked out this one just for you- to complement the color in your eyes!"
Naruto snorted. "What color?"
Sasuke just rubbed his temples. Her mood swings were giving him whiplash.
(Yes, Twilight had even hit the ninja world. No one was safe.)
.
And that was how Team Seven had ended up in this… predicament.
The fangirls were having a field day.
"Oh my gosh, do you see that? Over there?"
"Oh my gosh, is Sasuke-kun wearing a skirt?"
"Oh my gosh, he is!"
"Oh my gosh, does this means he's gay?"
"It really complements the color in his eyes!"
"Oh my gosh, I knew he was gay! How else would he be able to resist all of this?"
(Cue the jutting of… assets).
"Oh my gosh, this is so perfect! I can totally turn him straight!"
"Oh my gosh, how romantic!"
"Oh my gosh, I'm gonna!"
"No, I'm gonna!"
"NO, I'M GONNA!"
Team Seven watched in horror as the horde of crazed fangirls surged towards the Uchiha, with screams of "Pretty…" and "Let me turn you straight!"
Not even Kakashi-sensei's book-that-must-not-be-named could've scarred them this much.
.
The three young ninjas arrived, panting, at the training grounds, exhausted and frightened.
Sakura grinned. "So that's why boys can't wear skirts!"
Naruto nodded. "Or maybe just Uchiha."
Sasuke felt a headache coming on. Seriously, whiplash.
(So he was a twi-hard. Bite him.)
(No pun intended.)
.
A/N: It's the fourth, my sister is puking in urgent care, I'm still in my pajamas and I'm bored out of my mind. So I wrote this. :)
Review, Alert, Favorite, the whole shebang.
Happy fourth y'all.