Disclaimer: Monk isn't mine. I don't own Karen or Leland either or any other of the unoriginal characters
Rated T for the disciplinary spanking/belting of an adult
Karen checked the clock for the 45th time. It was 2 in the morning. Where the hell was Leland? He was in big trouble that's where he was. He was supposed to bring the kids back four hours ago and he didn't even bother to call. She couldn't reach him either. Karen was furious. She took a deep cleansing breath and she was still furious!
Finally he got back with the boys. After hugging and kissing her children she sent them upstairs to bed.
"Night mommy," Max said, "I love you"
"I love you baby"
"Love you buddy," Leland said
Karen glared at Leland which told him he would be soon facing her idea of the pointer or something much worse.
"Night mom," Jarred said, "I love you"
The minute the boys were upstairs Karen grabbed her ex-husband's arm and let him into the sunshine room to give him a good LONG lecture.
"Leland what the hell were you thinking," she asked him, "I was worried sick. I couldn't get a hold of you."
"I guess I really screwed up," Leland mumbled
"Ya think! Look, Leland I hate to do this I really do but I have to do something."
"You're gonna get mad at me aren't you?"
"No," Karen said, "that's not enough to teach you a lesson. Until further notice you are grounded from seeing the kids"
That hit Leland like ice cold water. He felt his knees begin to buckle and he had to sit down so he wouldn't collapse.
"Karen that's… that's not… even fair. I'll miss them like crazy"
"Good. It will teach you a very important lesson that you need to learn"
"But I-"
"Leland do you remember a few years ago"
"Not really"
"You remember… when we had an argument?"
"When didn't we have an argument," Leland mumbled
Karen reminded him of the incident she was speaking of.
"Right I remember," Leland said, "but I still don't think you're being fair"
"You're entitled to you're opinion Leland," Karen said, "but I really don't care right now"
"Karen," Leland whined, "it's not fair"
"I think it's very fair Leland," Karen said, "actions have consequences and even adults need to be held accountable for their actions. You of all people should know that"
"But Karen," he whined
"Do you want some cheese with that wine," Karen asked sarcastically
"No I want to be able to see my boys. We already lost Jennifer. How can you make me miss seeing my boys?"
"HOW could you make me worry like you did? How can you be so insensitive as you were?"
"Okay," Leland acknowledged, "I was wrong in what I did"
"Gee! Do you think! I'm 'shocked' that you were able to figure that out"
"Karen I had to-"
"You did have to do what you did a few years ago. I UNDERSTAND THAT BUT I DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU DID TODAY. I DO NOT YET FORGIVE THAT. YOU HAVE GOT TO LEARN YOUR LESSON."
"How about giving me one more chance"
"There will be plenty of chances after I say your punishment is over"
"I still love you Karen"
"I still love you too," Karen said, "but I will not cave. I am uncompromising when it comes to our children."
"Well can we at least try to work things out," Leland asked
"Yes," Karen replied, "but that doesn't take away from your punishment"
"I know," Leland replied tears flowing freely out of his eyes
The next day both Randy and Monk noticed that something was wrong with Leland. He was a guy that kept himself together well but he looked like had hadn't slept in a year, his hair was mussed up and he had bags under his eyes.
"Captain," Monk asked, "are you okay?"
"No Monk I am not okay," Leland replied seeing no reason to pretend with his friend, "I am far from okay"
Monk waited patiently for Leland to continue.
"Last night I got the boys home very late," Leland explained, "Karen was furious and rightfully so. I…"
"What happened," Randy asked
"I was grounded from seeing the kids for GOD KNOWS how long"
He waited for the jesting and the jeering to come but it never came.
"Leland," Monk said, "I'm sorry. I know that must be tough"
"You know," Randy said, "I know what you're going through"
"Do you?"
Randy nodded
"It's hard to go through tough times," Randy acknowledged, "nobody likes it. It really hurts"
Leland was surprised at Randy's insightful behavior. Normally he was a bit clueless.
"That's very insightful of you Randy," Leland complimented him
"How long," Monk asked
"I don't know," Leland responded, "Karen is really mad right now so I'm sure it will be at least a year"
"I doubt that," Monk said, "though it will probably seem that long"
Leland didn't say a word. He just realized that he was going to have to miss Jared's 12th birthday party"
Karen was at home doing her yoga when a gentle knock at the door was heard. It turned out to be Monk.
"Got some time for an old friend," he asked
"Of course I do," Karen replied, "I always have time for an old friend
She opened the door and let him in.
"So," she asked, "how are you doing? I know you've kind of been going through a bit of a tough time"
He nodded.
"Every day seems like a year," he told her, "it's not the easiest thing in the world"
"No I wouldn't imagine it is"
"You see it's like this," Monk said, "Leland's really upset about what happened"
"Good. He should be. He scared the heck outta me"
"I know. I know he deserves this but I was thinking maybe you could compromise just a little. I mean your kid's birthday party is in a few days. Let him go to that"
Karen looked at him with a 'you've got to be kidding' look on her face.
"Can I ask you a question," she said
"Didn't you just ask one," he replied, "when you asked if you could ask a question"
She gave him the look.
"I have to put that on my list of fears" Monk laughed a little, "getting the look"
"Adrian," Karen asked, "when you put a prisoner in jail or prison do you allow them 'days off' because it's a 'special occasion'?"
"Unfortunately no," Monk said sighing, "but Leland isn't exactly a prisoner"
"No, but he messed up very badly and he needs to pay for his transgression"
"But-"
"If he had called I would have said 'okay, have a good time' and I wouldn't have been worried sick. No, I can't cave on this one"
"Can't?"
"Can't! Don't you think I still love him? Of course I do. Don't you think that I want to and I'm willing to work things out? Yes, I am! I'm not willing nor am I able to bend on this"
"But he's never had to miss one of the kids parties before"
"He's never been grounded from seeing the kids before," Karen pointed out
"So don't you think you ought to set a time limit for this? Say, 2 weeks-"
"Two weeks? Why, because Jared's party is in 2 week?"
"It's not fair to Jared that his dad miss his party," Monk argued
"Please don't make me feel worse about this then I already do," Karen implored, "you know what it is to have to make a tough decision like this"
"Yes I do," Monk replied, "but think of the good of your children"
"I AM THINKING OF THE GOOD OF MY CHILDREN," Karen yelled, "He screwed up REALLY badly. He needed to be punished"
"I understand," Monk repeated, "but don't you think you might have come up with something less harsh"
"WHAT WOULD YOU DO IN MY SHOES," Karen asked Monk pointedly
"Probably trip," Monk joked
"I'm serious. If you were me and your wife was Leland what would you have done?"
"I would have talked to her very sharply. I would have told her I was worried sick and asked her if everything was okay"
"You know what my momma would have done," Karen asked him, "my daddy would have been hot and raw for a month because she'd have opened a can of whip a$$ on him"
"Well I'm not saying that I approve of that," Monk said, "I don't… but maybe you should do that instead of making him miss Jared's birthday."
Karen was quiet for a minute.
"Maybe you're right," she said, "I'll talk to him about it but he's still grounded from seeing the kids until Jared's birthday party"
"Good girl," Monk said, "that's more like it"
Karen placed her hands on her hips.
"Do I LOOK like a dog," she asked
"No ma'am," Monk gulped
Leland was at home when he heard a knock on the door. He went to answer it. It was Karen.
"Karen," he said somewhat delighted
"Um… can I come in?"
"Of course," he said moving aside to let her in
"Sit," she told him and he obeyed.
She sat down across from him.
"Leland you know I love you right?"
"Yes," he said, "and I love you too"
"Now you know what you did was wrong," she continued
"Yes. I do know that," Leland said, "and I am so sorry about what I did-"
"I know you are," Karen said taking a breath, "but it doesn't make what you did acceptable. You do have to be punished for what you did. However Monk made me see I was being a bit too harsh on you"
"So my punishment is up," he asked and Karen laughed
"Not even close," she told him, "now if my daddy had done what you did my mother would have opened a can of whip a$$ on him. I think you could benefit from a little bit of that"
She opened her purse and removed a thick leather belt from her bag. He looked frightened.
"Now," she told him, "you have a choice. You can either accept this, which would be the wisest thing to do and your grounding from the kids will last only 2 weeks… until Jared's birthday party or you could not accept it and it will last as long as I say it will last and I haven't decided that yet. It could be as long as 18 months"
"Karen honey I thought you didn't believe in the use of punishment"
"Not for children," she said, "but you knew what you were doing and you did it anyway and after what we went through with Jennifer that deserves severe punishment"
Leland thought about it for a minute and realized she was right. He needed this for two reasons. First so that she would forgive him. Secondly so that he could forgive himself.
"Okay," he said reluctantly, "do what you have to do"
Karen pointed to a corner and took a timer out of her back
"Stand there," she told him, "until the timer goes off"
"Karen," he whined, "this is embarrassing"
"Nobody's there to see it," she said, "now GO"
She swatted him lightly as he went
"OW," he whined
She didn't respond. She went into the kitchen.
"Where are your pots," she asked him
"Second cabinet drawer on the left"
"Thank you"
She got a pot, put in some water and put her belt in the water. Then she turned on the flame
"Are you making tea for yourself," he asked
"You'll see what I'm doing soon enough," she told him, "now quiet and think about what you did"
"I'm getting board"
"You're not supposed to be entertained," Karen responded sternly, "you're supposed to be thinking about what you did"
"Can I at least sit down? It would be more comfortable"
"You're not supposed to be comfortable. You're supposed to be thinking about what you did"
An hour later the timer went off.
"Okay," Karen said turning off the stove and letting the belt cool, "you can come out now"
Leland did as she said. He didn't want to make her angrier then she already was.
Karen was a small woman and her husband was much larger then she was in height and muscle. She led him into his room and told him, "pants and boxers off"
"What?"
"DON'T make me repeat myself," she told him
Reluctantly Leland took off his pants and boxers. He laid facedown on the bed.
"Um Karen," he said before she began, "you're not gonna be too hard on me right?"
"We'll see," Karen said
"I mean- I know it's going to hurt but-"
"Leland," she told him, "it's for your own good as well as the good of our relationship and our children"
She drew back her hand and lifted it up. She paused a second before she administered the first whack. All the feelings of worry and fear for the thought of her losing her other children came back to her. She had already lost her first-born and she just couldn't lose her other children. She steadied her hand and brought it down right in the middle of his sit spot.
He could hear the resounding smack before he felt it. He knew it would hurt but he didn't expect it to hurt so much.
"THAT," she said, "WAS FOR YOUR INSENSITIVE BEHAVIOR."
The second slap landed on the right side of his rear and it hurt just as much as the first one did. It was followed in quick succession with the 3rd on his left side of his rear.
"Those two were for the fact that you DIDN'T CALL ME when you knew you wouldn't be back until 2 (swat) o'clock (whap) in the (smack) morning (whack)"
"Karen," Leland whined, "this is really (smack) hurting"
"That's (whack) the (thwack) idea (pop) Leland. You (whack) did something (smack) stupid (slap) and you (whack) need to learn (3 swats in quick succession) your lesson. If you (swat) didn't do this (2 whacks) you wouldn't have to be (pop) hurting"
Suddenly the hits stopped.
"Are we done yet," Leland asked trying to hold back the tears.
"Done," Karen laughed, "that was just a warm-up. Do NOT move"
She went into the kitchen and took the belt from the pot. It was still warm but it wouldn't burn him… not in that way at least.
"I'm sorry Leland," she told him, "but this is really for your own good"
His eyes widened when he saw it.
"I hope you won't hold this against me," she told him, "because as angry as I am with you and I am VERY angry with you, I still love you. But I have to do this."
"I can't hold it against you," he said, "first I know I deserve it and second I love you. Could you at least tell me how many I'm going to get?"
"100," she told him, "and it's going to hurt. You need to see just how badly you hurt me by what you did"
"I know I did," he said, "and I am so so so so so so so so so so so sorry"
She doubled the belt in half, drew back and swung. It covered his entire bottom and made him feel like he had been set on fire. He could no longer hold back the tears. He couldn't stop crying.
"Okay," she soothed, "just 99 more to go"
She struck him over and over and over again. The pain grew increasingly at every smack of the belt.
"Okay Leland," she finally said, "this is the last one. After that you're done with that part of your punishment"
"Okay," he sobbed, "I'm ready"
"Good boy," she told him and gave him the last hit.
"Wait here," she said, "I'll be back in a minute"
He nodded as she left. He was in agonizing pain but at the same time he felt better. He could tell by the sound of her voice that Karen was no longer angry with him. That was a huge relief. He also knew that he could forgive himself. He also was relieved to know he would be able to see his children again soon. It would seem like forever but it would be soon.
He could feel someone put cream on his sore posterior and it felt soothing to him.
"Thank you Karen," he whispered, "that feels good"
"Can you get up," she asked him
He got up being careful not to let his backside touch any part of the bed.
"Leland believe me," she told him, "I took no pleasure in doing this"
"I know you didn't," Leland said, "and I'm so sorry about making you do it. I know that I had it coming"
As Leland looked up Karen could see that he had been crying. Seeing his tears made her start crying herself.
"No honey don- you don't have to cry. You did what you had to do"
"I know I did," Karen said wiping away a tear, "but I made you cry and I didn't mean to do it so hard"
"I might have done the same thing if I were in your shoes," he said then hugged her and she hugged him back.
"Do you want to try again," she asked
"Yeah. I think we owe it to ourselves and to the boys. We do love each other after all"
Karen nodded.
"This doesn't change the fact that you're grounded from seeing the boys until Jared's party"
"I know"
"And you still can't see them alone until I say you can"
"Isn't that a little harsh"
"Do you and the dog leash need to have a little talk," Karen asked but her tears prevented her from sounding stern.
"No ma'am. I learned my lesson," he said rubbing his sore tush
"Good man," Karen said with a slight smile
"How about tonight-"
"Whatever it is I can't tonight. I have my book club meeting"
"I could wat- never mind"
"You could what?"
"Nothing. I forgot that I was grounded from seeing them"
"You 'forgot'?"
"I was thinking I could watch them while you went to your book club meeting"
"You could if you weren't grounded from seeing them," Karen replied. She didn't sound angry. She sounded sad. The tears started flowing again
"No don't- besides you don't want to boys to see you when you're hurting like this. Think about it. How would that affect them?"
Leland thought about that for a second then nodded. Karen was right. It would probably have a bad affect on the boys to see their father hurting like that though they might get a giggle out of it. They had never gotten in trouble before but they had friends who did and they might have found it funny that an adult got in trouble like a little kid.
Jared was at the age where he'd find it funny. Max would probably cry himself because his daddy was hurting. It would be just like it was happening to him. The boy had EESS so it was hard for him to see anyone hurting especially when it was someone he loved.
Karen kissed his forehead and then left to pick up the boys leaving him in the apartment… still grounded and still sore. Even so he was feeling 100 percent better. The guilt that hung like a shroud over him dissipated a bit. He had been very punished for his misbehavior. He sat on his knees. If he sat on his regular he would have gasped.
He felt exhausted. In a few minutes, though the cream that Karen put on his punished bottom began to take effect. He was feeling a lot better, although he was still tingling.
"I know that I deserved this," Leland said to himself out loud, "and in a way I'm glad it happened but I'm less then happy about being grounded from seeing my children"
He thought of the boys. He thought of what they would be doing now. He thought of Jennifer. He missed her like crazy.
"I miss you honey," he told her, "I know you can hear me. Well, maybe you can't. I hope you can't. If you can't it means you're still alive"
Rarely did Leland allow himself to indulge that possibility. Today though, he needed that comfort. He took that comfort like a pain pill. He took that comfort like a glass of wine or some beer.
The phone rang but he ignored it. The answering machine will get it, he thought to himself, if it's important… but is anything important anymore. I doubt it.
He took comfort in the fact that Jennifer may still be alive. He took comfort in the fact that in just 21 days he would see his boys again. He would be able to hug them. He would be able to be a father again. He also took comfort in knowing that the pain of his belting would go away soon enough. By tomorrow it would be gone. Most of it, if not all of it would be gone anyway. How long could that pain last for?
Feeling tired Leland Stottlemyer took a sleeping pill and slept for the rest of the night.
He woke up the next morning and the cream had worn off. He didn't know that at first. He didn't know it until his backside came in contact with the mattress. He gasped as he felt the burning as though he had sat upon a fireplace instead of a mattress. Two tears one from each eye escaped him.
Monk would love this, he thought to himself, one tear from each eye… an even number.
The pain lasted 3 days. It finally went away. He felt like he just had a mild sunburn now. By the following day he would be feeling much better. He was going to take one more day off just to fully recover.
"Disher speaking," Randy said when the phone rang.
"Randy," Leland told him, "it's me. I'll be back tomorrow"
"Okay. Are you… feeling better?"
"Yes. Yes I am but it still hurts a little"
"It" was a sore throat. He had called in sick with a sore throat because he was embarrassed to tell them what really happened.
"I know what will make you feel better"
"What's that?"
"Come to Nathan's restaurant tonight at 7 o'clock"
"Why?"
"I'm going to be there with a couple of my 'little friends', wink, wink," Randy said
"Huh?"
Randy repeated himself with the emphasis on the word little.
"I'm baby-sitting tonight, wink, wink," Randy explained
"You?"
"Yeah me. It's not so hard to believe. I'm like a big kid myself"
Leland smiled in spite of himself. Randy definitely was like a big kid.
"Okay," Leland said, "just be careful"
"I will," Randy said, "I promise"
"And remember Max needs to have his shot every night"
"I know," Randy said, "to make sure his illness doesn't come back until the doctor confirms he doesn't need to take it anymore"
"Good boy," Leland said smiling
Leland hung up smiling and looked at the clock. Seven o'clock AM. That made it twelve hours until 7 o'clock PM.
There was a knock on the door. Leland answered it. It was Karen.
"Hey," she said, "I just came to see how you were feeling"
"It still hurts a little," he admitted, "but it'll be gone by tomorrow"
"I'm glad," she said, "and I'm sorry I had to do that"
"Don't be sorry," Leland said, "I know you had to do it"
Leland looked at the clock
"Do you have plans tonight," she asked
"Plans?"
"Yes plans… as in the intention of doing something"
Leland laughed
"Karen I do know what plans are. I did graduate elementary school"
"Okay so do you have plans for tonight?"
"Possibly," Leland said looking down avoiding eye contact, "I may be meeting up with a friend later"
"And you're avoiding eye contact because?"
"Oh… I wasn't. I just had something in my eye"
Karen just stared at him. She knew he was full of it.
"You don't have anything in your eye," she said, "so where are you meeting up with your friend"
"Um… at a restaurant," Leland said. At least that much was true so Leland could look his ex-wife in the eye while saying that.
"And what time are you meeting this friend?"
"Maybe 7 o'clock or so?"
"7 o'clock or so and who is this friend"
"R- Rudolph"
Karen raised an eyebrow.
"Rudolph? What's his last name? The red noised rain dear?"
She looked at him sternly but couldn't help but laugh.
"No he's… he's um… a little bit Italian"
"Do I look a little bit stupid," she asked cracking up, "Rudolph… come on"
"He-…"
"Leland don't dig yourself deeper," she said
"I'm not," he explained weakly
"So what restaurant," she asked.
Once again he avoided eye contact.
"We don't know yet"
"Leland, what restaurant are you meeting up with your friend at?"
"N-athan's," Leland admitted
"Sounds like fun"
"You're not mad?"
"Mad? Why would I be mad?"
Leland realized that Karen didn't know that Randy was planning to take the boys to Nathan's.
"I don't know," he said, "you probably wouldn't be"
"Would I Have A Reason To Be," she asked
"Um… no"
"Oh by the way when you see… 'the red nosed reindeer' you can't see the boys alone-
"H-how did you know?"
Karen laughed.
"Rudolph? Leland I love you but you are NOT a good liar"
"I-I'm not?"
"Not even close," Karen laughed, "Rudolph? That was a little too original."
"It was the only name I could come up with," Leland admitted.
"You are NOT to be alone with the boys tonight"
"What if Randy has to go to the bathroom?"
"That's a stupid question," Karen replied
"It's a valid question"
"Leland," she said firmly, "you know what I mean"
"I know. What I don't know is how you figured it out"
"Have a good time tonight," Karen said ignoring his bewildered expression and left laughing
"Rudolph," she laughed, "what a name"