Written for my wonderful cousin on his 21st Birthday. Can also be found over on Ao3 and on my Tumblr.
Disclaimer: I own nothing at all.
Pretty in Pink
When Sam saw, the result of Gabriel's latest trick on Dean, he worried if he would ever see his boyfriend alive again.
It was no secret that Gabriel loved playing jokes. Sam lost track of the times he had been teleported out the Bunker and dropped in the middle of some strange land. He was also running out of fingers to count how many times Gabriel shifted into a cat and followed Dean around the Bunker, causing Deans' allergies to play up. Not even Castiel was safe. Castiel would often awake to find everything he touched turn either feathers or would come alive. That prank had been a messy one, when Castiel had touched the books in the library and they came to life, reciting their passages at full volume, much to Dean's annoyance.
It was probably because of Sam's relationship with Gabriel that stopped Dean from trapping and frying himself some extra crispy angel wings. Or maybe that Dean was slightly fearful of what Gabriel could do without warning.
But this, was just taking it to the whole next level. Sam looked at Gabriel who was standing looking very pleased with himself in the garage of the Bunker. Sam cringed as he looked at what used to be a very beautiful car, the pride and joy of Dean's life.
"So what do you think? I think it is a natural improvement myself. The shading is something I would like for myself, but I think it would suit Dean. Sets off his eyes pretty nicely. What do you think Sam?"
"Well. Dean is defiantly going to be…surprised."
Gabriel smiled at Sam and stepped back to admire the new changes to Dean's car. Gone was the gorgeous black paint job and the beautiful model and it its place was a beach jeep, not so different from a popular children's franchise Sam was aware about. The paint job was a hideous shade of bright pink with purple flowers and stars splattered around. The license plate now read "PRTY N PNK" and the wheels were the most disgusting yellow. It looked as if someone had thrown up a variety of fruit sweets on the car.
"That is not the best bit." Gabriel said, flipping a switch in the jeep. Music started to blare and Sam covered his ears. The song was the popular Barbie Girl song that irritated Sam when it came out first time around. Oh Dean was going to fry himself some archangel tonight.
"I was thinking of playing Taylor Swift because we both know that is Dean's guilty pleasure but then I thought, what about Barbie Girl? It seems to fit a lot better. Obviously Saturday Night was an option, but not even I am that cruel."
"You know he is going to make you extinct right?" Sam asked Gabriel, thanking anyone who was listening when Gabriel turned the music off. "That I'm probably going to have to be the one who goes to Heaven and explain why their resident archangel is dead. And I do not want to tell them it was over a pink jeep."
"It'll be worth it though. Admit you have wanted revenge for all those pranks on him. Think of this as your revenge."
"Ah no. Keep me out of this. I value life thank you. I did not survive Lucifer for my own brother to finish what Michael wanted." Sam held his hands up. "You're on your own with this one."
"Hey Sammy, Gabriel what is…" Dean had walked into the garage holding a beer before he stopped dead in his tracks and dropped his beer on the floor with a loud smash. Sam saw Dean's saw clench up like it always did when Dean was on the verge of throwing a fit. He stepped back, away from Gabriel and pressed himself up against the wall.
"Hey Deano. Do you like it? I was sceptical myself, but after some consultation with Sammy over here I finally managed to finish my project." Gabriel smiled brightly at Dean, ignoring the warning shake of the head Sam threw at him.
"Gabriel. What have you done to my car?" Dean said in a low, deadly voice.
"Improved it. That old thing was going out of fashion. I reformed it into the modern trend of today."
"It's hot pink. With purple stars." Dean growled. "And yellow wheels. It looks like something out of a Princess show on TV."
"The correct pink would be fuscia Dean. I know it can be confusing but let us not get our colours mixed up."
"I'm going to fucking kill you…" Dean warned, advancing closer to Gabriel.
"And it just does not have a great new paint job and body. Check out what happens when you switch it on." Gabriel lent over and flipped the switch. Sam covered his ears.
The loud, happy pop music blared out of the large speakers that were installed on the back of the jeep. Dean growled again, deep in his throat as he cringed at the music.
"It has a great sound system. One all your friends would be jealous off. It only does play this song unfortunately, but hey, one small fault is not going to cause any harm."
"I am going to pluck out your wings, one wing at a time and personally stomp on every wing as I go along." Dean threatened the archangel who was bouncing on his heels, sucking on a lollipop. "And then I'm going to take your vessel's body, once I exorcise you out of it, and hand deliver it to the doors of Heaven myself and send it back as an example for other feathered dicks who think of tampering with my baby. Turn her back. NOW!" Dean thundered the last part, lunging at Gabriel who jumped out Dean's way with a cry of laughter.
"Oh Dean. I am upset by your comments. After all, it was Sammy's idea. I just did the design."
"Oh no. I had no part in this thank you." Sam protested when Dean whirled around to look at him.
"Sam! You're meant to be on my side. You know. Your boyfriend's side?!" Gabriel whined.
"Sorry, I value my life thank you." Sam called back. "Please don't kill my boyfriend?" Sam added as a plea to Dean.
"Oh killing him is not on the list of things I wish to do to that son of a bitch." Dean huffed. "Change my baby back to her original perfect form. Now." Dean shouted to Gabriel.
"Hmm. Nah. I quite like this." Gabriel laughed from where he was now sitting on a stack of boxes. "Improvement."
"Gabriel I swear I will escort you to Hell personally if you do not change Baby back." Dean threatened, shaking his fist at Gabriel.
"Gabe. Please." Sam asked. "I cannot take any more of that Barbie Girl song." Sam pleaded, adding in the puppy dog eyes for good measure.
"Fine. But I want tons of sex for this." Gabriel sighed, snapping his fingers and returning Baby back to her old pristine condition. "And I mean tons."
"Gross." Dean huffed. "Listen here you holy terror. Touch my Baby again and you will never live to see another day. Ever. And for God's sake stop referencing your sex life in front of me. It's disgusting."
"No. Call it revenge for those times you bragged about yours." Gabriel stuck his tongue out to Dean and fluttered over to Sam, landed a big, sloppy kiss on Sam's cheek. Sam smiled and patted down Gabriel's hair who purred in response.
"This is new levels of disturbing." Dean shook his head. "Now piss off, I need to check if Baby is OK, no thanks to you."
"Aye-aye Sir." Gabriel mock saluted then grabbed Sam's arms and disappeared. Dean shook his head and walked over to Baby, stroking her exterior and mumbling sorry and threats to Gabriel about her. Dean slid inside the car and checked the interior all over before deciding everything was in condition. Sighing, he switched her on and smiled as he heard the engine purr.
Well, he was smiling until he heard the irritating notes of Barbie Girl again. Dean kept trying to switch the song off, but every radio station seemed to play that song. Dean slapped his hands against the wheel.
"GABRIEL!" Dean shouted. "Fix this NOW!"
All he got in response was loud laughter from somewhere in the Bunker, before the song changed to another pop song that was ten times more irritating than the first song.
Meanwhile in Sam's bedroom, Sam watched in amusement as Gabriel flicked through a playlist on the laptop. "Don't you think you're pushing him?"
"Hey he said don't mess with the car. He never said anything about the radio."
Sam only shook his head. Yes Gabriel loved his pranks. Perhaps a little bit too much. But Sam wouldn't have him any other way.