Big Red Car
Disclaimer: Stargate: SG-1 and The Wiggles' 'Big Red Car' do not belong to me.
"Big Red Car, pwease?"
Jack glanced at the toddler through the rearview mirror. "No, Danny," he said vehemently.
Beside him in the passenger's seat, his 2IC barely squashed down a giggle. She quickly sobered as her CO narrowed his eyes at her.
The dark haired boy's lip quivered, big blue eyes glistening with tears. "But Jack…"
Jack sighed, chancing another glimpse into the rearview mirror. "Sorry, kiddo. I left the disk at home."
"No doubt on purpose," Sam muttered under her breath.
The colonel shot her another withering look. She gave him an innocuous smile.
Daniel pursed his lips in thought. His eyes glowed bright as an idea occurred to him. "You sing, then!"
Jack groaned, thumping his head against the headrest. "You're kidding, right?"
The toddler steadfastly shook his head, a determined look on his young features.
"Absolutely not!" he said gruffly, pounding the steering wheel with an open fist.
Daniel let out a loud wail, more at the older man's tone of voice than the fact that he wasn't getting his way.
Sam winced. "Maybe you should do it." At the death glare he sent her, she added, "Sir."
Jack let out a resigned sigh, gripping the steering wheel. The crying in the backseat continued on as he kept his eyes glued to the road.
Ten minutes later, Daniel's wails had reached its peak. Sam eyed her CO nervously.
"JUMP IN THE CAR! AND BUCKLE UP," Jack suddenly hollered over the sound of Daniel's throaty sobs. "AND WE CAN RIDE THE WHOLE DAY LONG."
Daniel stopped abruptly, a fugitive tear escaping and rolling down the swell of his chubby cheek. Sam turned her head and smiled at her reflection in the window.
"Ride into town, walk down the street," Jack continued on in a much more normal, less painful pitch, "get back in the car and buckle up into my seat!" At Sam's giggle, he narrowed his eyes and jabbed her gently with his elbow. "Sing!" he hissed.
"What?" Sam asked, appalled.
"Danny, don't you want Auntie Sammy to sing, too?" Jack said, a triumphant grin upturning the corners of his mouth as Daniel's face lighted up.
"Yeah! Sam sing, too! Sam sing, too!" he squealed, kicking his tiny legs against the car seat.
"Sir, I don't even know the--"
"Carter! You sing, and that's an order!"
Sam stared at him incredulously.
"Sam!" Daniel pouted. "Pwease?"
"Yeah, Sam," Jack mimicked. He smirked, batting his eyelashes at her. "Pwease?"
Sam sighed. "Yes, that's the way we do it," she half-sang, half-muttered. "Riding in our big red car."
"Hey! Where's the conviction? The fervor?" Jack said with a winning smile, truly enjoying her discomfort.
Sam gave him a pleasant smile that did not reach her eyes. In fact, her light eyes seemed a bit… crazed. "I hate you, sir," she said with false cheer.
"SAAAAM!" Daniel shrieked in the backseat.
Jack and Sam simultaneously shot the toddler their own withering looks before reluctantly breaking out into song.
"Jump in the car, put on my seatbelt. And we can ride the whole day long…"
Daniel grinned a triumphant grin, waving his arms exultantly as he took his cue. "Yes, dat's da way we do it! Riding in our big red car!"
"Oh, he's so got it coming when he's big again," Jack swore under his breath, pulling into the tunnel leading farther into Cheyenne Mountain.