Legoless was checking himself out in the river. A bird flew by and whistled at him and he totally knew what that bird wanted, but he wasn't into that. Legoless put his clothes back on reluctantly taking care to not injure his huge member in the process. A deer was staring at him.

Fuck off deer he said

Suddenly Orcs were all over him, but not in that way. Legoless was glad he had put his clothes on, no one could resist that bod. He griped his shaft and the orcs made satisfying grunting noises and pointed enviously.

Yeah orcs love that shit he talked.

Edward Cullen came through the clearing looking fine.

Whad up Lego? I see your holding your Envy of all Men. Edward smiled.

Yeah bro, lets smack da shit out of these Orcs Legoless jumped into a tree and growled sexily.

Come and get it if you can take it!

Edward bro slapped Legoless from the ground.

Awesome fight scene. Orcs flew everywhere and the awesomeness of their powers combined into Captain Planet.

By your powers combined I am Captain Planet. Captain Planet said.

All the orcs were died but their bloody flesh was still warm and steamy like the shit of a thousand horses.

Fighting orcs always makes the blood flow….to my penis. I said as I walked out of a bush.

I was the sexiest person there. Three bird's whistled at me.

Fuck off birds I said

Legolesses yelled who are you and touched himself rapidly.

Edward got down on all fours and howled.

I'm A.J. I said flipping my hat backwards. You guys like my bod? You know I've heard that Orcs blood makes the best lubricant, like the taste of caramel with the texture of bubble bath. You all should slip that shit onnnn.

Captain Planet was aroused

Legoless was hesitant I've never tried this he yelled!

Don't be such a chick Edward said…unless you want me to pound you like one he added with a wink.

Fucking sexy I said

We jumped into the river and grabbed large Bass and started rubbing each other.

What the fuck are you doing? Said Captain Planet

It's a fish you pussy said Edward and slapped his ass with the Bass.

Ahhh Yeaaaaaaaaaaah I screamed running back to shore for some more Orc blood. I rubbed it all over myself and Harry Potter came out of the woods to stroke my wand.

All five of us want it so bad. They wanted me. I wanted Edward. Edward wanted Legoless. And Harry wanted some seed.

Give it to me Harry Potter yelped.

You want some, you got it, screamed Captain Planet. Power of… SPERRRRRRRRRM!

The Cap let his salty man juices pour out onto the ground.

You're wastin' that shit, screamed Edward as he ran to the salty spout and took in as much as he could. Where the sperm fell, flowers grew.

Legoless ate the flowers and shat them out onto me. Thanks, Legoless, but now here comes yours, I said as I ended the chapter.

TO BE CONTINUED