Summary: Morgan and Reid have been in a relationship for over two years now. When it finally comes time for them to come out to the team, can someone else's jealousy tear them apart?
Torn Apart
By: True Rayanne Adaire
The first thing Derek Morgan sees in the morning is always Spencer Reid. It's been that way for two years and he hopes it'll be that way for the rest of their lives. The two men, who first met in the BAU, have been in a relationship for the past two years. It's a complete secret, of course, because neither man is sure what their teammates and friends will say about it. Besides, they're happy like this. Derek is at least. He's happy with their small apartment; with Spencer's sleeping face as they sleep twined in the king size bed. Happy with the life they've built together and he thinks Spencer is too. Spencer has never expressed being unhappy with it. Not in any words, at least. But lately he's been quiet and rather withdrawn at work. Not his usual self at all. Which is why, on this particular morning, Derek has a speech planned for Spencer over coffee. Now, this is not normally a safe thing to do seeing as how Spencer is not normally a talkative person in the morning. But they may not get home until late and Derek just wants his Spencer back. He wants him back all the time…not just here at home.
"Spence?" He begins, staring at his partner over the dining table.
"Mhmm?" Spencer says, blinking at him.
"What's wrong?"
Spencer just gives him a blank look and Derek sighs. He'll have to explain it fully then.
"You've been really quiet at work lately. I just want to know if there's something wrong."
Spencer sighs, looking at the table. "I dunno…"
And there it is. There's something wrong and Derek will not rest until it's fixed.
"What is it, love?" he doesn't usually call Spencer by any pet names but Spence looks so sad…Derek needs to comfort him somehow. And he doubts morning sex twenty minutes before work will help.
"I'm just kind of sick of hiding things from the team. Feels wrong. I mean…Garcia is always trying to set me up on dates and Johnson keeps shooting these looks at you and…I just want them to know."
Oh. So that's it then. Derek lets out a small laugh and leans forward to press a kiss to Spencer's lips.
"We'll tell 'em then. If it'll make you happy, we'll tell 'em the whole damn story. I promise."
Spencer's face lights up and Derek's heart warms at the sight. "Today?"
Derek laughs. "Today. As soon as everyone's in the office. Now, let's leave or we'll be late. Again."
But Spencer is smiling at him. "We can go together today. If we're gonna tell them, we might as well go to work together."
"In that case…can I interest you in a shower?"
Spencer's answering smile is absolutely brilliant and Derek loves him a million times more. They go to the bathroom and shower together and it's brilliant the way it always is. Even when Spencer insists on getting out first because if not they really will be late. And then they're off to the office to tell the team about them and Derek is nervous. Nervous because he loves Spencer and doesn't want to lose him. He tells himself it's silly. Spencer loves him and he's not going anywhere. So what's with the pit in stomach? Soon, the whole team is there and Spencer grins at him and his worries fade immediately at the sight of that smile.
"Hey guys…Spence and I have some news for ya."
"What's up?" Garcia asks, coming out of her own office for the announcement.
"Spencer and I have been keeping a secret from you all and he wants it out in the open. I do too. We've…uh…we've been in a relationship for a little over two years now." He says and Spencer rolls his eyes.
"It was two years yesterday, Derek." He says and Derek grins.
"I knew that."
"Sure you did."
The team smiles at them like they already knew and Derek misses the look of contempt that Kaylee Johnson, their new team member, shoots at Spencer. Spencer doesn't miss it, though, and Derek sees the sudden look of sorrow that crosses his partner's face. Still, he doesn't say anything. They'll talk when they get home tonight. Talking now would lead to a public display of affection and he's promised himself to avoid those at all costs. And a minute later, Spencer is grinning at something Garcia's said and Derek himself forgets the sad look from a few minutes earlier. They're swept up in congratulations and happy wishes and Derek doesn't miss the fact that Johnson is missing from all the happy wishes. Still, he doesn't think too much of it. He knows she's had a crush on him for a while…and maybe she just needs time to accept it.
The day passes quickly with no cases and they go home early. Spencer is quiet as they walk to their car and Derek thinks maybe he's just tired. Until they get inside the car and Spencer speaks, his voice quiet and sad. Derek doesn't like what he hears. In fact, it makes him angry. Very angry. Angry enough to get out of the car and yell at the person responsible. He doesn't, of course, get out and yell at anyone. But he thinks about it.
"Johnson doesn't think I'm good enough for you…" Spencer says quietly.
"When did she say that?"
"When you were getting lunch. She stopped by my desk and…and she…she said…"
"Said what Spence?"
Spencer blinks hard and Derek fights back a wave of anger. "She said that I'll never be good enough for you. I'm an ex-addict and I…and I don't deserve you."
"I'll have a talk with her tomorrow morning. Don't worry about anything she said. She's wrong. You're everything I've ever wanted or needed and I promise I'm never leaving you. Or letting you leave me."
"O…okay. I love you, you know that?"
The words are soft and Derek smiles at him as he starts the car. They share a kiss and Derek murmurs an 'I love you' against his lips before driving off. The next morning, after he's had a while to calm down, Derek sits down with Johnson. She looks so smug, though, that his anger returns almost immediately.
"I'm going to tell you this one time Johnson. If you ever tell Spencer that he's not good enough for me again, I will not hesitate to block you out of our lives for good. I love him. I love him more than anyone in the entire world and I will not let you or anyone else ruin this for me. He is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Do you understand me?!"
"Of course Derek."
She says the words and Derek walks back to Spencer but things don't get any better. He thinks maybe Spencer's believing what she's told him but Spencer never admits to that. But he sees the looks Johnson shoots at them, sees the way she glares at Spencer every time they're in the same room together. It makes him angry but he doesn't say anything. Doesn't trust himself to say anything. If he has to say something again, he'll lose his temper. And that would more than likely end badly. Very badly. So he lets it go. Until one day the unthinkable happens and he has no choice.
It starts in the morning before work. They've been driving together every day since they came out to their team members but, that morning, Spencer insists on driving himself. Derek doesn't argue because he doesn't realize how bad things are going to get. They get to work and Spencer's quiet again. He misses the looks Johnson is shooting them. What he doesn't miss is the way Spencer's face is almost white when he leaves for the day and the small, folded piece of paper on his desk.
I'm sorry Derek. But she's right. I'm no good for you. I…I love you…but it's over.
That's all it says and Derek's heart plummets. He must look like hell because Garcia is next to him in an instant.
"What's wrong Derek?"
Derek hands him the paper wordlessly, hands shaking. Garcia reads it, her own face hardening. When she's done, she asks who Spencer's talking about and Derek tells her, anger mixing with the pain in his system.
"Go home, okay? I'll find Spencer and bring him home to you and we'll deal with this whole thing tomorrow. Hotch will find out what she's been doing. Don't worry. We'll fix this."
Derek can only nod as he heads home to an empty house. Spencer isn't there and it's hours before Garcia turns up with him. Hours of silence, of nothing but Derek and Clooney and the empty apartment that's never been this quiet before. He sits at the dining room table, barely holding back tears, with Clooney at his side. When the door opens and Garcia steps in, pulling Spencer along with her, he's out of his chair in a heartbeat. Half a heartbeat even because he's so relieved to see Spencer. He wraps his arms around the smaller man, holding him so tightly that it's a wonder he's still breathing. Spencer's squeezing him back just as tight though and he thinks maybe they're both crying a little.
When they break apart, the only thing he can say is, "Please don't ever do that to me again."
Spencer rests his forehead against Derek's and murmurs, "I won't. I'm sorry. God I'm so sorry."
They go to bed then, thanking Garcia for everything she's done. The next day, Hotch sits down with Johnson. She's made to understand just how important it is that she stays out of Derek and Spencer's personal affairs. They're long-standing members of this team, he says, and they are important to everyone on it. She apologizes and – surprisingly – it doesn't happen again. Johnson isn't a friend, she could never be that, but they'll have her back at work and that's all that really matters. And two years later, when they marry, she's there with the rest of the team. It's been four years now and they're married with an adopted son that they both adore.
